Thread: Heaven: The SoF Vestments Fashion Parade Board: Limbo / Ship of Fools.


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Posted by Belisarius (# 32) on :
 
Inspired by the Caption Competition Board and a thread in Hell some time ago.

Each day, a new outfit will be highlighted with color commentary by Paul the Hermit, Maurice, and Lydia Purpuraria, the Patron Saints of Clothing. After about 24 hours or if the comments die out sooner, someone may post a (tasteful, it is hoped) link to a new outfit.

Shall we begin?

< Cue "Girl from Ipanema" on the Hammond Organ >

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*Outfit No. 1 *
***********

Paul < reading from Cue Card >: "More than just a Purple Haze, Bishop Mark is ready for both his Metropolitan duties and the cold Moscow winters in this stylish Epsicopal ensemble.

Maurice: Ooh, good start. Look at how the horizontal stripes add body and volume--

Lydia: I miss the sleeves, though. More sleeve the better, I always say...


[Edit by Coot: doing a bit of formatting for commentators to stand out]

[Fixed link]

[ 19. December 2005, 18:49: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
 

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Posted by Sioni Sais. (# 5713) on :
 
Resolve parking problems by concealing your car under the vestments!
 

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Posted by Mamacita (# 3659) on :
 
Maurice: "And the back view is equally stunning, with an elegant train. See how the red stripes extend the lines of the ensemble."

Lydia: "And, Maurice, those flowing lines are echoed in the dramatic black mitre, with its long veil."

Paul <snippily, checking notes>: "That's called a kamilavka, people!"

<applause>

[ 15. September 2004, 03:48: Message edited by: The Coot ]
 

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Posted by Ags (# 204) on :
 
Maurice: (sotto voce to small,rather grubby man who is pulling at his sleeve) "I don't care if your camel has lost its blanket. You're not having this one!!"

[ 15. September 2004, 03:49: Message edited by: The Coot ]
 

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Posted by Mamacita (# 3659) on :
 
Paul: <reading cue card> If we could have our next model, please.

*Outfit #2*

Organ shifts into medley from Jesus Christ Superstar while model pirouettes.

Lydia: Why, it's the seventies all over again. Will you look at those earth tones, Paul?

[ 15. September 2004, 03:50: Message edited by: The Coot ]
 

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Posted by The Coot (# 220) on :
 
Maurice: <bitchily> Here we have a change of pace, the blues and reds of a full body drape, inspired by British Soccer Hooliganism and American Patriot fervour give way to demi-season colours suggestive of an active outdoor lifestyle involving archery and deer-hunting.
 

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Posted by The Coot (# 220) on :
 
Paul: Yes, Maurice. Quite. Or a game of darts down the pub on a Friday night.
 

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Posted by Miffy (# 1438) on :
 
Member of the audience: I tell you, it was this big!'
 

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Posted by Belisarius (# 32) on :
 
Lydia: To be fair, it does have that kicky, devil-may-care quality for the hierarch on-the-go--the kind of thing you can just slip on when going out shopping...
 

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Posted by Lady Lyda of Roesharon Manor (# 4544) on :
 
Paul: I think I recognize scraps from the parish banner-making project. That burnt orange -wasn't that the hull of the Children's Choir Noah's Ark?
 

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Posted by Miffy (# 1438) on :
 
Member of the audience:

Wide, wide as the ocean...
 

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Posted by Sir Isaac Cootton (# 220) on :
 
Maurice: Oh, Lydia! Naughty me! Mm. And speaking of nautical... those blues and greens. I'm thinking sea. I'm thinking submarines. I'm thinking... PERISCOPE CROSS-HAIRS!

(sings campily)

"Welcome sailor... to the shore..."
 

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Posted by Belisarius (# 32) on :
 
Paul: Take it down a notch, will you? It's hard to believe that you and your regiment got massacred for not making pagan sacrifices.

Maurice: Ooh, and sitting in a cave for 90 years is so manly--

Lydia < whispering >: Will you both shut up?? Keep it up and we'll be dropped from the Calendar...

[ 15. September 2004, 19:43: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
 

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Posted by Sir Isaac Cootton (# 220) on :
 
Lydia: <restoring order> Our next model from that renowned power-house of fashion, St Gregory of Nyssa, shows us how to ac-CESS-orize!


*********
* Outfit 3 *
*********

[ 16. September 2004, 13:05: Message edited by: Sir Isaac Cootton ]
 

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Posted by Belisarius (# 32) on :
 
Maurice: Love the vertical sweep--while it's the opposite effect of Outfit #1, it's just as effective. This outfit just shouts "I'm here, you'd better pay attention."

Paul: I don't know--I think it's a little too busy...
 

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Posted by Sir Isaac Cootton (# 220) on :
 
Maurice: Lydia dear, in your estimation, as a purveyor of fine cloth; where do you see the origins of our model's garment?

Lydia: Ashram, Maurice. Definitely Ashram. Yet there is a hint of... Kamahl and perhaps, if I may savour it a little longer: notes of Demis Roussos thrift shop donation.


[Edit: Because missing apostrophes of ownership as so unfashion-conscious]

[ 16. September 2004, 16:54: Message edited by: Sir Isaac Cootton ]
 

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Posted by Young fogey (# 5317) on :
 
Of course I like the Russian bishop's gear - he's not a metropolitan; they wear a light-blue mantle. (That's what that purple cape is - his mantle or monastic cape, not a cope; purple for a bishop.) The hat indeed isn't his mitre (that looks like a kind of crown); it's a monk's hat, the klobuk (kamilavka with veil). (Almost all Eastern Orthodox bishops are monks as many of you know.)

And I like both the modern-looking priests' pictures too, even though the chasuble isn't something I'd think of using. The wearer is facing the right direction and in a church with a nice reredos too!

The last pic is from St Gregory's Episcopal Church in San Francisco, which I think people expect me to hate. They're wrong about a lot of things but I don't. They're bright, creative people who simply need to be grounded in the church, in the Catholic faith. The priest's garb reflects that tradition (though not recognizably any one rite of it) though that church doesn't practise it.

[ 16. September 2004, 18:43: Message edited by: Young fogey ]
 

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Posted by Ags (# 204) on :
 
Maurice: Mmm, yes, Paul, I do see what you mean, but busy is so now, don't you think? And that Sunset Yellow positively illuminates his skin.

Paul: I think the little black number on his head adds simplicity to the whole affair. Very kosher.
 

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Posted by Mamacita (# 3659) on :
 
Maurice: Of course it's kosher, silly boy. September 16 is Rosh Hashona.

Lydia: I rather like the chunky beads around his neck. Beads are so now.

Paul: You know, the red-and-gold thing picks up the colors from the carpet as well. Nice touch. But whatever that striped cloth is on the seat, well, who put that shmatteh there?


[Cootie made it nice]

[ 17. September 2004, 11:43: Message edited by: Sir Isaac Cootton ]
 

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Posted by Sir Isaac Cootton (# 220) on :
 
Paul: Well Oufit 3 really turned some heads there. And now for something... fresh. Something soft, yet crisp, that whispers... sophia.


*********
* Outfit 4 *
*********
 

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Posted by Sir Isaac Cootton (# 220) on :
 
Young Fogey (as himself): Ahhhhhhhhhh!!! Avert your eyes!!! Look not upon the wanton Jezebel!


[Host notelet: do all be loves and try to format your posts nicely]
 

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Posted by Agamemnonny nonny (# 204) on :
 
Maurice: Nurse, may I have a bedpan please?


Lydia: She's a vicar, not a nurse. And also very pink. Errrr, lovely.
 

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Posted by Belisarius (# 32) on :
 
Audience Member: WOO-HOO! SKIN-TO-WIN, SKIN-TO-WIN, SKIN-TO--

< CLUNK! >

< THUD >

< Dragged out by Ushers >
 

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Posted by sophs (# 2296) on :
 
[random aside, I told my ordinand landlady that I'd buy her one of those for Christmas... ]
 

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Posted by Lord Protector dude of The _uk (# 5671) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Belisarius:
< snip >

< Dragged out by Ushers >

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quote:

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Young Fogey (as himself): Ahhhhhhhhhh!!! Avert your eyes!!! Look not upon the wanton Jezebel!

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I'm flattered.

Actually the model is rather pretty.
 

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Posted by Rossweisse (# 2349) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Sir Isaac Cootton:
Lydia: <restoring order> Our next model from that renowned power-house of fashion, St Gregory of Nyssa, shows us how to ac-CESS-orize!

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quote:

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Originally posted by Rossweisse:

quote:

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Originally posted by Sir Isaac Cootton:
Lydia: <restoring order> Our next model from that renowned power-house of fashion, St Gregory of Nyssa, shows us how to ac-CESS-orize!

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Okay, I'm losing faith in the proposition that the ability to accessorize is what separates us from the lower animals.

I WAS going to ask that old question from the opera house ("Doesn't she have any gay friends who can tell her how to dress?"), but...mmmm....I think I'll just let that one go right by.

Rossweisse // bravo, Sir Isaac Cootten!

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Hmmm, I thought the "official" catwalk outfit was the one on the gentleman presiding, with the orange-and-red stole, brooch, clunky beads, and cap, but all that tie-dye (especially that lacey collared number ) made my eyes roll.

I do like the deacon's stole visible in the front of the piccie, the one in green and brown stripes.

Charlotte (liturgical costumer wanna-be echoing that "Bravo!")
 

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Posted by Agamemnonny nonny (# 204) on :
 
Paul: Hmmm, strongly influenced by, who is it now? Ummm, Chanel? No. Armani? No. McQueen? No. Westwood?? Possibly....
What are we getting here, Maurice?
 

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Posted by Coot of the Caribbean (# 220) on :
 
Maurice: (becoming serious) What we have here, Paul, is inspiration from the discalced Maronite Little Brotherhood of Martha. Note the rainbow tunicle and matching girdle which embodies the spirit of the inclusive, progressive church.

<Reads from Cue-card> Father Mansour, gown by Germaine Greer, handbag by Armani.


.

["I can make a sacrifice AND clear up afterwards" ]
 

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Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :
 
Lydia We've seen a lot of the layered look - umm, well, except maybe the first model. I had a feeling he was changing out of his wet swimming togs under there. But as I was saying - layers, yes; but with a cinch belt? So unforgiving of those extra pounds.

And if you are going to have that number of strong horizontals in the outfit, I think it's a mistake to give up on heels for that extra height. Especially as it would pick up the pointy motif in the hat.
 

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Posted by kingsfold (# 1726) on :
 

quote:

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Paul: ...What are we getting here, Maurice?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Never Conforming:
Maurice: I don't know how I'm going to pick my favourite outfit. They're just *so* special.

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Time for a poll...

[Outfit #1 won by a landslide.]

[ 14. February 2005, 18:46: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
 

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Posted by Goodric (# 8001) on :
 
I have a vacancy for a Team Vicar - do ya think no 4 might be up for it?
 

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