• everytime a newbie says they thought this was a christian website, take a drink!
• every time they tell RooK that he doesn't scare them, take a drink!
• Every time they claim this place is full of meanies with potty mouths, take a drink!
• and if they flounce, drain the cup and refill!
• Is accusing the H&A of being unfeeling bastards on power trips worth a drink, or "drain the cup"?
• I'll also propose a "Drink, then find the nearest blunt object" for any of the phools who think they're being big and clever by adding "Oh, since we're in Hell: Fuck."

• Whenever somebody uses the phrase "read for comprehension", drink!
• Whenever somebody refutes anything with a single solitary and otherwise unsupported piece of supposed personal experience, drink!"
• Whenever somebody uses an acronym that isn't found on the first page of any search engine, drink some GIN!(2)

quote:

---

Originally posted by Rook:
(1) Keep in mind that drinking and posting rarely mix well, and are not officially advised...

---

quote:

---

...Unless you have a Designated Editor.

---

...upon reflection one might have considered altering?

Naaaaaaaaaah, couldn't happen:

Especially when it's 100F (110 in one's un-airconditioned apartment), and you're looking for a distraction.

Besides, I never remember anything I've said the following day (and I trust no one else does)

...

So, this is Heaven: Nice place - I must remember to drop by here again some time

in the next 12 months

or so



S-E
 

---

Posted by dogwonderer (# 12169) on :
 

• every time someone who has a higher post count than 3000 says ‘this place ain’t what it used to be’, take a drink

• every time someone says ‘preview post is your friend’, take a drink

• every time comet mentions the word Alaska, take a drink

• every time someone says something awed and sycophantic about Erin, finish whatever’s left in the bottle and take a diazepam

• for every use of the term "ad hominem" take a straight shot
• if you see someone Junior Hosting before the host arrives, the host has to take a drink. or two.
• the axe murderer smily means drain your cup!

quote:

---

Originally posted by Socratic-enigma:
Besides, I never remember anything I've said the following day (and I trust no one else does)

---

oh... Hosts have long memories. loooooong memories.

and a willingness to use it against you however far in the future it may become necessary.

just part of the comprehensive service we provide.
 

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Posted by Codepoet (# 5964) on :
 
Everytime an Eccles regular mentions GIN, drink some
 

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Posted by Sir Kevin (# 3492) on :
 
Every time you're playing a game in Circus and the post after yours is rubbish, take a drink!

Every time someone posts at the same time as you and makes even less sense, take a drink!
 

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Posted by The Wanderer (# 182) on :
 
Everytime someone in Purgatory mentions Calvinism take a drink. (Things will begin to make sense then )
 

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Posted by Jon J (# 11091) on :
 
Everytime someone makes a comment which is potentially offensive and thinks that by putting a , or after it, they make it OK, have a drink.

[ 05. January 2008, 12:58: Message edited by: Jon J ]
 

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Posted by Doublethink (# 1984) on :
 

• Everytime a post in styx with a tech query is followed by another post from someone else thanking the volunteers take a drink - if it includes a smilie take two, and drain the cup and refill for a bowing smilie
• Everytime someone mentions the organ fund, drain your cup, calculate the cost of the drink and donate a sum of that value
• Everytime someone you have posted in reply to is suspended, finish off the bottle and log off for 24 hours
• Everytime someone you have posted in reply to is permenantly banned, hold an alcohol fuelled wake and invite at least two other shipmates to share it with you and log off for 48 hours
• Whilst reading the prayer thread, have a pitcher of long island iced tea by your side - add an ice-cube for every votive smilie and take a drink for every group of three votive candles. Vodka shot for every prayer post that included reference to someone else's prayer request. (For the sake of your liver this activity should be limited to 5 minutes).
• Everytime you see a host post in their offical capacity you must drink a quarter of a pint of carrot juice
• Everytime a swearword is included in a post to you, you must add a dash of angastura bitters to your current drink

quote:

---

Originally posted by Doublethink:

• Everytime a swearword is included in a post to you, you must add a dash of angastura bitters to your current drink

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:
Everytime someone makes a comment which is potentially offensive and thinks that by putting a , or after it, they make it OK, have a drink.

---

Every time you make a comment that is potentially offensive --

And you put in a smilie like or to show that you don't particularly care if it's offensive or not -- 'cause you're feel plenty of bonhomie toward the guy you're answering (even though you think his opinion has all the well-thought-out long-lasting value of sneezed-in tissue paper) --

Mail him a bottle of Tequila. With an especially hairy-larva worm in it.
 

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Posted by Jon J (# 11091) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Janine:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:
Everytime someone makes a comment which is potentially offensive and thinks that by putting a , or after it, they make it OK, have a drink.

---

Every time you make a comment that is potentially offensive --

And you put in a smilie like or to show that you don't particularly care if it's offensive or not -- 'cause you're feel plenty of bonhomie toward the guy you're answering (even though you think his opinion has all the well-thought-out long-lasting value of sneezed-in tissue paper) --

Mail him a bottle of Tequila. With an especially hairy-larva worm in it.

---

Jon goes off to look up the word 'bonhomie' in the dictionary.
 

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Posted by Hart (# 4991) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by dogwonderer:

• every time someone who has a higher post count than 3000 says ‘this place ain’t what it used to be’, take a drink

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Hart:

quote:

---

Originally posted by dogwonderer:

• every time someone who has a higher post count than 3000 says ‘this place ain’t what it used to be’, take a drink

---

Every time someone who has a lower post count than 300 says `this place ain't what it used to be', take many drinks.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Liverpool fan:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.

---

But remember to take a drink afterwards.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by beachlass:
Anytime a newcomer with a post count lower than 5 starts a thread take a drink.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by jlg:

quote:

---

Originally posted by beachlass:
Anytime a newcomer with a post count lower than 5 starts a thread take a drink.

---

If they start a thread in Hell, take an additional two drinks.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mamacita:
If you see botched UBB code from someone with less than 100 posts, take a drink. If it's from someone with over 100 posts, take two. Unless you're a host on that board, in which case you can drain your glass.

---

If the botched code is by a fellow host, correct it, and then mock them unmercifully in your [ETA: ]

Making damn sure you don't botch your own code.
 

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Posted by Liverpool fan (# 11424) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Liverpool fan:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.

---

But remember to take a drink afterwards.

---

ITTWACWS

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Liverpool fan:
What does that mean?

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Liverpool fan:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Liverpool fan:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.

---

But remember to take a drink afterwards.

---

ITTWACWS

---

What does that mean?

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Liverpool fan:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Liverpool fan:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.

---

But remember to take a drink afterwards.

---

ITTWACWS

---

What does that mean?

---

There is a thread in the Styx that answers your question.

Moo
 

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Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 
Every time somebody uses the phrase tu quoque, balance your glass on top of your head, shout "DO AS I SAY, NOT AS I DO!", and drain the glass.

Every time somebody uses a or a to mollify a truly foul insult, take a drink and tell everyone in the room you didn't.

[ 06. January 2008, 00:03: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]
 

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Posted by Beautiful_Dreamer (# 10880) on :
 
Every time you see the person who thinks they know everything get something wrong, take a drink.

If they actually admit to being wrong, break out your snowblower. Hell has frozen over.
 

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Posted by Liverpool fan (# 11424) on :
 
Thanks Moo. This website is almost Quaker-esque in having all these abbreviations.

Anyway, thanks Jon. I shall indeed do so.
 

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Posted by Zwingli (# 4438) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by The Wanderer:
Everytime someone in Purgatory mentions Calvinism take a drink. (Things will begin to make sense then )

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by The Wanderer:
Everytime someone in Purgatory mentions Calvinism take a drink. (Things will begin to make sense then )

---

I think Calvin would approve. One of his conditions of settlement in Geneva was a good cellar of wine.

Jengie

p.s. he was trying not to have to accept the post.
 

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Posted by sabine (# 3861) on :
 
Hmmmm.....it would be fun to see all of you sliding off your chairs and staggering around after taking those drinks.

All I would have to do is use all the phrases and smilies mentioned on this thread--all of them! If I had time, I could do it all in one post, and then we'd have to have a belly-up meet!

Bwahahahaha! (what, no drinks for the devil smiley??)


love and kisses

...and don't take the diazepam!

sabine
 

---

Posted by comet (# 10353) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally post by The Wanderer:
OK - my comment was meant to raise a smile, rather than to cause offence. Clearly I got that wrong. I apologise.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Beautiful_Dreamer:
Every time someone tries to make a joke but it completely bombs, take a drink.

---

• If Mousethief hands you a Mousethief Cooler, take a drink. (Duh)

quote:

---

Originally posted by The Wanderer:
OK - my comment was meant to raise a smile, rather than to cause offence. Clearly I got that wrong. I apologise.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Jon J:
Every time you check a shipmate's profile and they have hilariously reinterpreted the question 'Favourite Boards' - take a stiff one.

---

Hey, I resemble that remark.

If the bottom line of the profile reads Profile last updated by Erin take two drinks, with a chaser.

If the profile was last updated by Simon, drain both bottles.
 

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Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 
Ok, two more for Hell:

If several people completely depart from the Op for two or three pages to discuss what Hell is for, how to navigate Hell, or what makes the Hellions cooler than any other shipmates, take three very large swigs of your favorite laxative.

If someone tells somebody else to "stay out of the kitchen if you can't stand the heat" and then later gets inordinately offended over something really stupid, (or vice-versa), take a big mouthful then spit it right back in your glass.

(Circus)

if somebody gets genuinely offended on the Offended thread (hey, it's happened), take a drink of a Shirley Temple.

(Heaven)

If someone (for instance) hops onto a "favorite book/ movie" thread with no other contribution than "your favorite book/ movie sucks", take a drink of Zima. And like it.


All boards:

Every time shipmates discuss a hostly action on the thread itself rather than taking it to the Styx, send that host a bottle of their favorite libation. (sorry, pet peeve of mine.)
 

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Posted by Beautiful_Dreamer (# 10880) on :
 
(Circus)

If someone posts on a 'quote thread' using a movie/song/book quote that no normal person would have heard of, take a drink.

If someone actually guesses one of these obscure references correctly, take two drinks.

If someone quotes a book/song/movie and attributes the quote to the wrong person or misquotes, take a drink. Take two drinks if they argue when they are corrected.

(Hell)
When someone personally insults you and only succeeds in making themselves look like an ass, drain your bottle.
 

---

Posted by Spike (# 36) on :
 
Whenever a newbie starts a Styx thread asking why a board such as Hell is necessary on a Christian website, take 3 drinks and, while you're at it, post a Hell call against that poster.
 

---

Posted by jedijudy (# 333) on :
 
When someone quotes a post and adds "What he/she said", take a drink.
 

---

Posted by Gort (# 6855) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Spike:
... and, while you're at it, post a Hell call against that poster.

---

• If a newbie issues a new battle cry (It's WAR WITH NO RULES!), get out the beer bong - it's time to funnel-chug.

• Someone confuses SoF with real life
• Someone doesn't realise that SoF can play a part in real life

quote:

---

Originally posted by The Wanderer:
OK - my comment was meant to raise a smile, rather than to cause offence. Clearly I got that wrong. I apologise.

---

The Wanderer - I took no offense, and I'm sorry that it came off that I did, I found your post humerous. Calvinism makes all our heads spin occasionally, as do many other -isms; I just don't like it used as an insult especially when misapplied, which is not what you were doing.

Jengie Jon - if Calvin is mentioned, take a glass of wine.
- if Luther is mentioned, grab a beer.
- if Zwingli is mentioned, buy Zwingli a beer.
 

---

Posted by Sioni Sais (# 5713) on :
 
If someone claims that "this is a lame Hell thread/call" have a drink. If they claim that this is the lamest ever, have three. If someone requests a new TICTH thread, buy a host a drink.
 

---

Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Zwingli:

if Zwingli is mentioned, buy Zwingli a beer.

---

Zwingli, Zwingli, Zwingli, Zwingli, Zwingli.

There, that oughta keep you on the floor for a few days.
 

---

Posted by Jon J (# 11091) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by WatersOfBabylon:
When IngoB and MadGeo start duking it out over the true nature Buddhism, just grab the whole bottle. You're gonna' be here for a while.

---

Very True.

 

---

Posted by Sober Preacher's Kid (# 12699) on :
 
For Purg:

Whenever one of the Orthodoxen assert they are the One True Church and the West is fallen/heretical/has cooties, take a shot of Ouzo or Vodka, depending on the source. This may require two shots.

If one of the Roman Catholics mentions they are the One True Church, down some Marsala or Port.

If one of the Anglicans asserts they are the One True Church, drink a shot of Gin.

If one of the Reformed says they are the One True Church, down a shot of whisky. No water, that's cheating. It's full Presbyterian Fire for you.
 

---

Posted by beachlass (# 4979) on :
 
If someone from the United Church of Canada asserts that THEY are the One True Church, ask what they have been drinking, (or smoking) and if they are going to share.

After you've picked yourself up off the floor, and controlled the hysterical laughter, that is.
 

---

Posted by Sober Preacher's Kid (# 12699) on :
 
All right, all right, I 'fess up. I said the United Church was the One True Church.

It was drinking Bacardi 8 on the rocks. Want shome, I'ff shtill got haff a bottle left. <hiccup>
 

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Posted by Beautiful_Dreamer (# 10880) on :
 
When you see someone accuse someone else of doing something, and then they do that thing themselves, take a drink.

If they try to justify why it is okay for them to do X but not for the other person, take two drinks.

Drain your bottle if they actually manage to convince anyone or sound coherent.
 

---

Posted by beachlass (# 4979) on :
 
Whenever someone interrupts the current conversational thread to hurl incoherent insults and demand that a host close the thread because it isn't to their taste: drink.
 

---

Posted by jlg (# 98) on :
 
Aw, did someone step on your precious little toes somewhere? Poor baby.
 

---

Posted by Mamacita (# 3659) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by beachlass:
Whenever someone interrupts the current conversational thread to hurl incoherent insults and demand that a host close the thread because it isn't to their taste: drink.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by jedijudy:
When someone quotes a post and adds "What he/she said", take a drink.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Marvin the Martian:

quote:

---

Originally posted by jedijudy:
When someone quotes a post and adds "What he/she said", take a drink.

---

What she said.

:glug:

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