Thread: Heaven: What to play with in church Board: Limbo / Ship of Fools.


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Posted by Erroneous Monk (# 10858) on :
 
A certain thread in Purgatory is very close to triggering a Hell Call. However in an attempt to lighten the mood, whilst also providing a forum for more hellish comment on the subject, I thought we could discuss what we'd like to play with (and have our children play with) in church.

I would like a Wii with a programme that enables you to hold the handsets, and see yourself on screen saying the Mass, doing the hand-waving etc. Something along the lines of Roman Catholic Priest-Hero.

I think this would be entertaining and would also encourage vocations. Any parent, therefore, who encouraged their child to play with this should surely be commended?

Any other suggestions?

[ 18. February 2010, 14:32: Message edited by: jedijudy ]
 

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Posted by Spike (# 36) on :
 
This doesn't belong here. Off to Heaven with yhou

Spike
Hellhost
 

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Posted by jacobsen (# 14998) on :
 
Oh yes. And how about liturgical dressed dolls -male and female priests, monks and nuns. Dressing and undressing them, and mixing up the various items of liturgical wear , albs, stoles, berettas etc - would keep kids happy for hours. And at last we could solve the vexed question of whether religious bods wear knickers or not.


(A less expensive version of the game might use paper dolls.) Can't you hear some gleeful athiest in the making squeak up "Look, Mum, Father Fred's wearing a frilly thong!"


Not to mention "Why are the traditional nuns wearing Moslem veils?"

 

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Posted by Erroneous Monk (# 10858) on :
 
Although, if Father Fred is anything like Action Man, he will have plastic underpants and No Willy.

"Mummy - why does Father Fred have no willy?" would be a great question to be asked at the top of toddler voice during the Eucharistic prayer...
 

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Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :
 
Is this the right time to ask what Pee Wee Herman played with in church?
 

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Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :
 

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"Mummy - why does Father Fred have no willy?" would be a great question to be asked at the top of toddler voice during the Eucharistic prayer...

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quote:

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"Not weeing in the bath."

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quote:

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Originally posted by jacobsen:
And at last we could solve the vexed question of whether religious bods wear knickers or not.

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Now that's a question that had never crossed my mind before. And one that will no doubt fascinate me in the next Sunday Service. Oh deary me...
 

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Posted by leo (# 1458) on :
 

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Originally posted by Matariki:
Baptist Trainfan said;

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"Not weeing in the bath."

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Lord have mercy upon us, and incline our hearts to keep this law.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Otter:
Building blocks, Erector sets, Lego, and other building toys, and build churches out of them.

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Or build houses with them, with the option of building in the sand tray or on a rock. At the end of Mass, the celebrant pours holy water over the houses and the congregation observe which stand and which fall.
 

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Posted by Taliesin (# 14017) on :
 
...Is there a 'children's sayings in church' thread?? If so, I need to add my son's as a 5 year old, totally derailing the minister's 'Talk to young people'

Minister: who is the most important person here?

my son: I am. (deadpan)
 

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Posted by jedijudy (# 333) on :
 
This is what I play with in church.
 

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Posted by Zacchaeus (# 14454) on :
 

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Originally posted by amber.:

quote:

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Originally posted by jacobsen:
And at last we could solve the vexed question of whether religious bods wear knickers or not.

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Now that's a question that had never crossed my mind before. And one that will no doubt fascinate me in the next Sunday Service. Oh deary me...

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quote:

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Originally posted by Erroneous Monk:

quote:

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Originally posted by Otter:
Building blocks, Erector sets, Lego, and other building toys, and build churches out of them.

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Or build houses with them, with the option of building in the sand tray or on a rock. At the end of Mass, the celebrant pours holy water over the houses and the congregation observe which stand and which fall.

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When oldest son was 5 or so he built an exquisitely elaborate multi-layered lego cathedrral. He proudly showed me each level, showing me where the priests go in, the people sit, etc. Then I asked about the lower level:

"That's the alligator dungeon" he said.
"Alligator dungeon?"
"for the Baal worshippers".

Time to ease of the OT readings I'm thinking....
 

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Posted by PataLeBon (# 5452) on :
 
This thread reminds me that I used to play communion in the shower stall at my house where I grew up.

To this day I don't know why I thought that was appropriate...
 

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Posted by Tilley (# 13687) on :
 
DD builds churches out of the soft toy blocks that are kept in a box in a side aisle. It distracts her from complaining that the choir is too noisy.
 

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Posted by mousethief (# 953) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by PataLeBon:
This thread reminds me that I used to play communion in the shower stall at my house where I grew up.

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To whom did you give communion? No, wait, I'm sure I don't want to know.
 

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Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 
I was a little geek; I played with the hymnal. Particularly if the sermon was boring. Needless to say, I got to learn the hymnal pretty intimately.

I would read through all the services we used, as well as the significant number we didn't use. I would read through the Psalms. I would locate my favorite hymns and "sing" them in my head. I would try to work out the foreign language pronunciation of the hymn titles. I tried to see if I could follow the notation or figure out the meter keys.

As I got older, I would take sermon notes for confirmation class. This continued after i got confirmed, only I would use my paper and pen to argue with the Pastor regarding his main points. I still do this. Any time a minister observes me with my head down scribbling furiously after they have said something, they should be worried.

During the service itself, my older sister and I devised a way to communicate with each other using the hymns.

(To the tune of "Ein Feste Burg")

Me: What time do yo-ou think Sun-day School starts?
Sis: E- lev'n O'clock, as u-su-al

You get the idea.

Also, our church usually had slips of blank paper in the pew holders, which I would draw on. I found this to be meditational as well as creatively stimulating.

One last note: Youth Specialties published this little gem. I once lent it to my pastor, with a note asking him to please have it back to me by the next Sunday, as I would undoubtedly need it.
 

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Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :
 

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Originally posted by jedijudy:
This is what I play with in church.

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I had a feeling you might say that.

One of my fellow-altos in the choir makes little boats out of cough-sweetie papers; she had enough to singe the King of Spain's beard until the Altar Guild found them ...

ETA: we measure sermons by how many boats she can make.

[ 08. January 2010, 01:32: Message edited by: piglet ]
 

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Posted by Janine (# 3337) on :
 
Seems like with a shower stall you'd want to play "Confessional".
 

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Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by piglet:
One of my fellow-altos in the choir makes little boats out of cough-sweetie papers; she had enough to singe the King of Spain's beard until the Altar Guild found them ...

ETA: we measure sermons by how many boats she can make.

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You will now be Quotesfiled!
 

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Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :
 
Oh dear - is it going to hurt?
 

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Posted by QJ (# 14873) on :
 
as a kid, church was tough to endure and i got pinched a lot by mom. they sang "blessed be the tie that binds" and as the third son and plump, the shirts passed down by my skinny older brother had tight collars enhanced by ties that seemed to bind. as a kid i never understood why those ties were blessed.
games for kids
count the heads. take a paper and put columns for the different kinds of heads.
bald heads
toupees count for two
big hair ladies
ladies with mens hair cuts
ladies with wigs
ladies with root growth needing dye.

another bonus game for immediately after church would be to pay out a dime for every hunk of gum pulled off the bottom of the church pews. this could be a once a year game played 6 months away from easter. kind of a gummy egg hunt.
 

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Posted by churchgeek (# 5557) on :
 
I also read hymnals and wrote on slips (I think offering envelopes) in the pews. My sister & I wrote notes back & forth.

This is one more of the many, many reasons churches should have hymnals and not use projectors. Kids can amuse themselves undisruptively with a hymnal; not so much with the projector.
 

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Posted by daviddrinkell (# 8854) on :
 
A four-manual pipe organ does me all right...
 

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Posted by Stejjie (# 13941) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Drifting Star:
Grandmother's Footsteps as they go up for communion.

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Posted by Jengie Jon (# 273) on :
 
My father practised his mathematics with the hymnboard.

Then for the older kids there is the long honourable tradition of preacher cricket. Rules vary congregation to congregation but it works on common nuances of the preacher.

For adults who want to spice up the service, there is taking bets on the theme of the sermon. Easier amongst English dissent (where the hymns are chosen to fit the theme) than amongst the CofE where such a link is rarer.

For littlies (those under five) there is how far can I get away from my parents before someone notices and brings me back. Its a form of grandmothers footsteps only the rest of the congregation are grandmother.

For charismatic services there is chorus bingo! With the shout of "alleluia" rather than bingo when all five of your chosen choruses comes up.

Jengie
 

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Posted by amber. (# 11142) on :
 

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Originally posted by Zacchaeus:

quote:

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Originally posted by amber.:

quote:

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Originally posted by jacobsen:
And at last we could solve the vexed question of whether religious bods wear knickers or not.

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Now that's a question that had never crossed my mind before. And one that will no doubt fascinate me in the next Sunday Service. Oh deary me...

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You mean that you didn't know that they have to wear them in the correct liturgical colours, with sackcloth knickers for Lent? They come from the special vicar's knickers shop.

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Crumbs, I have a whole new respect for the Bishop's Chaplains and their wardrobe-sorting-out duties
 

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Posted by Erroneous Monk (# 10858) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by daviddrinkell:
A four-manual pipe organ does me all right...

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quote:

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Originally posted by Erroneous Monk:

quote:

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Originally posted by daviddrinkell:
A four-manual pipe organ does me all right...

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Yeah, but why can't all the children have one, eh?

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Originally posted by Presbyopic:
There is a friend of ours in church who sits with his wife directly in front of us every week and draws an very elaborate sketch on his offering envelope during the sermon. The picture is always based on whatever our pastor preaches that day. We, being near him get to see the sketch first during the offering. If you look around during the offering, you'll see other families taking a quick peek at his envelope as the plate passes each week.

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That seems realy cool. Who could complain?
 

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Posted by ErinBear (# 13173) on :
 
Drawing or doodling is excellent. I did it for years when I was very little, and still occasionally do so (I confess). The church I attend even has blank notepads in the pew for people who want to take notes or children who need to doodle. Good thinking.

As a child I also grew fond of origami. Bulletins are handy for so many things. It is easy to make many squares and if you have memorized a number of origami patterns, you can entertain yourself well and quietly for a good long time.

Blessings,
ErinBear
 

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Posted by Benny Diction 2 (# 14159) on :
 

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Originally posted by ErinBear:
Drawing or doodling is excellent. I did it for years when I was very little, and still occasionally do so (I confess). The church I attend even has blank notepads in the pew for people who want to take notes or children who need to doodle. Good thinking.


Blessings,
ErinBear

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quote:

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Originally posted by Erroneous Monk:

quote:

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Originally posted by daviddrinkell:
A four-manual pipe organ does me all right...

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Yeah, but why can't all the children have one, eh?

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quote:

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Originally posted by mousethief:

quote:

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Originally posted by PataLeBon:
This thread reminds me that I used to play communion in the shower stall at my house where I grew up.

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To whom did you give communion? No, wait, I'm sure I don't want to know.

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To my imaginary friends.

And I didn't know what a confessional was at that time, or I'm sure I would have figured out how to play that too.
 

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Posted by cliffdweller (# 13338) on :
 

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Originally posted by Benny Diction 2:

quote:

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Originally posted by ErinBear:
Drawing or doodling is excellent. I did it for years when I was very little, and still occasionally do so (I confess). The church I attend even has blank notepads in the pew for people who want to take notes or children who need to doodle. Good thinking.


Blessings,
ErinBear

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Is the blank note pad ting in pews common to Californian churches? I visited one in Fresno 3 or 4 years ago and there were some pads in the pews there. (Though the sermon was good enough not to require any doodling.)

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quote:

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Originally posted by Kelly Alves:

quote:

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Originally posted by Presbyopic:
There is a friend of ours in church who sits with his wife directly in front of us every week and draws an very elaborate sketch on his offering envelope during the sermon. The picture is always based on whatever our pastor preaches that day. We, being near him get to see the sketch first during the offering. If you look around during the offering, you'll see other families taking a quick peek at his envelope as the plate passes each week.

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That seems realy cool. Who could complain?

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quote:

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Originally posted by QJ:
as a kid, church was tough to endure and i got pinched a lot by mom. they sang "blessed be the tie that binds" and as the third son and plump, the shirts passed down by my skinny older brother had tight collars enhanced by ties that seemed to bind. as a kid i never understood why those ties were blessed.
games for kids
count the heads. take a paper and put columns for the different kinds of heads.
bald heads
toupees count for two
big hair ladies
ladies with mens hair cuts
ladies with wigs
ladies with root growth needing dye.

another bonus game for immediately after church would be to pay out a dime for every hunk of gum pulled off the bottom of the church pews. this could be a once a year game played 6 months away from easter. kind of a gummy egg hunt.

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quote:

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Originally posted by cliffdweller:
One of my former pastors who'd been raised by missionary parents in China used to doodle Chinese characters during long, boring meetings. He swore he was just writing the alphabet or taking notes, but I suspecting he was actually writing "that is the stupidest idea I ever heard!" or "will that cliffdweller ever shut up?!"

Now we have a lot more native Chinese speakers/readers in the congregation he'd never get away w/ it though.

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quote:

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Originally posted by amber.:

quote:

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Originally posted by Erroneous Monk:

quote:

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Originally posted by daviddrinkell:
A four-manual pipe organ does me all right...

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Yeah, but why can't all the children have one, eh?

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I'd recommend a harmonica each. Just the thing for any boring bits...

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quote:

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Originally posted by Presbyopic:
But have you ever tried to sing a hymn when the person singing beside you is singing completely different lyrics? It's very difficult.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Erroneous Monk:

quote:

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Originally posted by Presbyopic:
But have you ever tried to sing a hymn when the person singing beside you is singing completely different lyrics? It's very difficult.

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Heh heh heh. Have you ever tried singing a hymn when the pianist/organist is playing the tune of a completely different hymn? Once, due to an error of transposition on the hymn number board, I started playing "My God, Accept my heart this day" while the congo were singing "Glorious things of thee are spoken".

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During Advent and Christmas our musical director inexplicably had us sing the words of the Doxology to a Christmas hymn instead of it's own perfectly adequate tune, (can't recall which one) but depending on how you looked at it, the Doxology had too many words for the notes or the hymn had too few notes for the words.Every week for over a month the congregation completely butchered the whole thing and ended up falling about laughing. I think she may rethink the whole thing next year.

ETA fixed code

[ 09. January 2010, 21:15: Message edited by: Presbyopic ]
 

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Posted by Presbyopic (# 10596) on :
 
Just remembered the tune.


The Doxology to the tune of O Come O Come Emmanuel.

Try it and see. It doesn't fit very well. But it kept up well entertained for a few week.
 

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Posted by jedijudy (# 333) on :
 
Presbyopic, that reminds me that one of my friends told me that the church he was going to sang the Doxology to Regent Square during Advent. I thought that would be a bit peculiar.

Which reminds me that I was another "child playing with hymnal" when I was young. I would sing using all the words from the first score (verses one through four, or whatever,) then all the next score and so on down the hymn. Just to mix it up, you see, so I was probably confusing the adults near me. I would also change parts, singing one verse in soprano, the next alto, and tenor and bass. Again, just to mix it up.

I must have been eight or nine Y-O.
 

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Posted by ErinBear (# 13173) on :
 
In regards to notepads in the pews, I have seen it in a few other churches. I know that for my church, we hoped it would be helpful to adults and children. We also hoped it would help children in particular use the notepads rather than the offering envelopes, because that form of paper for doodling is much cheaper for the church and - let's be honest - there's more of it easily available if they feel the need to keep doodling, rather than using up the whole pew's supply of envelopes. We want the children to feel welcome, yet also want envelopes to be available for other people too. I think in our case, that's a big reason the notepads went into the pews.

Blessings,
Erin
 

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Posted by QJ (# 14873) on :
 
a comment on presbyotics foreign singers -
attending church in the bible belt of missouri, the family down the road became happy devout christians and attended church with energy. they were sort of hillbillies. i love to sing from the pews, and when they started up while sitting next to me, well, my brain ground to a halt, i could not think a note. often enought after that they sat near enougth to me that i had to push almost all music out of my head except the piano so i could sing also. i'm sure god loved their singing, but i would want to try a korean minstrel nearby before deciding which is more difficult.
your story is pretty funny though.
 

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Posted by Gracious rebel (# 3523) on :
 
Jedijudy has just reminded me of another hymn singing game I used to play in church as a youngster. I would sing the correct words to the correct tune BUT never slurring any syllables, just singing one syllable to each note of the tune. In this way, depending on the tune, I could often end up way ahead of the congregation, sometimes even getting ahead by a whole verse IIRC. (this needed a tune with lots of slurred syllables and several verses, such as 'O Thou who camest from above'.)
 

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Posted by Angel Wrestler (# 13673) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by QJ:
as a kid, church was tough to endure and i got pinched a lot by mom. they sang "blessed be the tie that binds" and as the third son and plump, the shirts passed down by my skinny older brother had tight collars enhanced by ties that seemed to bind. as a kid i never understood why those ties were blessed.
games for kids
count the heads. take a paper and put columns for the different kinds of heads.
bald heads
toupees count for two
big hair ladies
ladies with mens hair cuts
ladies with wigs
ladies with root growth needing dye.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Presbyopic:

During Advent and Christmas our musical director inexplicably had us sing the words of the Doxology to a Christmas hymn instead of it's own perfectly adequate tune, (can't recall which one) but depending on how you looked at it, the Doxology had too many words for the notes or the hymn had too few notes for the words.Every week for over a month the congregation completely butchered the whole thing and ended up falling about laughing. I think she may rethink the whole thing next year.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Presbyopic:
But have you ever tried to sing a hymn when the person singing beside you is singing completely different lyrics? It's very difficult.

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It happens every time the person putting the words on the screen does them in a different order from the ones in the book. Which is about once a service.
 

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Posted by ecumaniac (# 376) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Erroneous Monk:
I would like a Wii with a programme that enables you to hold the handsets, and see yourself on screen saying the Mass, doing the hand-waving etc.

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quote:

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Originally posted by ecumaniac:

quote:

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Originally posted by Erroneous Monk:
I would like a Wii with a programme that enables you to hold the handsets, and see yourself on screen saying the Mass, doing the hand-waving etc.

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Wish granted!

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Posted by Presbyopic (# 10596) on :
 
Is making bets during a church service some sort of sin even if money doesn't actually change hands during the service?

This morning we sang "Here I am Lord" following the ordination of some Elders. This hymn has a small run of notes after the first line that is meant to be just music, no singing.

I bet my husband 10 bucks that someone would try to start singing the next line of singing during the music only portion. My bet was $10 per verse that this happened. There are 3 verses in the hymn.

Edit some typos

I made twenty bucks

[ 17. January 2010, 23:09: Message edited by: Presbyopic ]
 

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