quote:

---

I am in need of your assistance, Am Michael Cole. The Sergeant of the Army of the United States, I have about 15.7 million US dollars that i want to move out of Iraq. I need a good partner,someone i can trust to actualize this venture.The money is from oil proceeds and legal.
But I want to move it by diplomatic means to your house directly or a safe and secured location of your choice using diplomatic security services and my personality as the Sgt. Can I trust you? Once the funds get to you, you take your 20% out and keep 80% for me. Your part of this deal is to find a safe place where the funds can be sent to and my part is sending it to you.
If you are interested reply and I will furnish you with more details. Kindly treat this email confidential as i won't want anything that will jeopardise my image as the Sgt.

Urgently awaiting your response.
Michael Cole.

---

I notice his English is not terribly good, so he may be of the George Bush school of military tactician, also known for interests in oil? Paradoxically this good and honest sergeant's email address is "sgtjohn.brown@us.army.mil" so he may have received some degree of identity confusion, perhaps as a result of shocking experience on the front line.

He has my deepest sympathy. Perhaps there are others like him, whose experiences you might share as you receive them. Perhaps you could suggest how I can help poor Michael Cole / John Brown, or how I should write back to him, what I should suggest he does with his much deserved windfall.

Suggestions, please - and similar tales of woe. The world is such an unhappy place. I just really just want to help.

[ 02. March 2011, 20:37: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
 

---

Posted by Sir Pellinore (ret'd) (# 12163) on :
 
Like you, I have been solicited by people such as this, usually from Nigeria.

I once 'won' a lottery in Spain and had to send in my bank details. Sadly, I was suspicious and didn't comply, hence missing out.



It is a sad world. People more gullible than you or I have been fleeced.
 

---

Posted by Enoch (# 14322) on :
 
This Michael Cole must be quite a guy if he is 'the' sergeant of the Army of the US. Does he mean he's the only one, or so well known that all other sergeants are as nobodies? What wonders do you have that you have been selected by such a person out of all the other inhabitants of the world?

If he uses a different name for his emails, perhaps he is letting you know, as the sort of person who is familiar with such things, that he is in espionage. Or perhaps he is so special that he has dual identity and bilocation.

Don't write back though. Us ordinary people are not special enough for the likes of him.
 

---

Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :
 
Zappa, dear, you have my sympathy. In my capacity as a volunteer at the Cathedral office, I use their general e-mail account, and I've lost count of the number of honourable, Christian widows of Nigerian millionaires, who have terminal illnesses and would like to use us as a conduit for their wealth.

We even had one once telling us that we were beneficiaries in the will of the late Edward Heath (U.K. prime minister in the 1970s).

It's what the "delete" button is for.
 

---

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :
 
A scary number of vicars have been caught out - they are too nice, you see. And they thought the Nigerian spam-mongers were just some more tramps come-a-knocking at the vicarage door for tea and sympathy.

Anyone remember the old-fashioned version of chain letters? Where, if you didn't make copies to send to all your friends (and send a postcard to the first person on the list), some terrible tragedy would befall somebody or something, somewhere? Oh, the guilt.
 

---

Posted by Erroneous Monk (# 10858) on :
 
However you can always console yourself with the scambaiting letters archive of 419eater
 

---

Posted by jlg (# 98) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Chorister:
Anyone remember the old-fashioned version of chain letters? Where, if you didn't make copies to send to all your friends (and send a postcard to the first person on the list), some terrible tragedy would befall somebody or something, somewhere? Oh, the guilt.

---

Luckily, Chorister, I do remember those, but in an earlier and more innocent guise. The ones I received back in the late '50s / early '60s were simply a sort of glorified and innocent (as far as I know) Penpal scheme.

Someone sent you a letter with the names and addresses of ten people. You were to send a postcard to the top person on the list. You then deleted the top name and added your name and address to the bottom and forwarded the letter to ten of your friends.

I forget the exact numbers, but the claim was that within X number of weeks you would receive Y number of postcards from all over the world!

Back then it was just the innocent fun of hoping to get lots of postcards (back when postcards were the postal equivalent of a text message or similar) and maybe even some from Foreign Countries! How exotic!

But, yeah, they usually had the vague but dire warning about breaking the chain.

I did my best, initially, but I don'tremember if I actually came up with ten people, but I dutifully sent off my postcard.

I received three or maybe four postcards. And I got my first dim understanding of Ponzi Schemes. Math on paper is one thing, math as executed through vast numbers of individuals expected to all do the same thing is quite something else.
 

---

Posted by Ariel (# 58) on :
 

quote:

---

But I want to move it by diplomatic means to your house directly or a safe and secured location of your choice using diplomatic security services and my personality as the Sgt. Can I trust you?

---

quote:

---

Once the funds get to you, you take your 20% out and keep 80% for me.

---

Fine. I opened new bank account straightaway specially to receive the funds. To show trust I ask you to transfer some money to this account immediately on receipt of this email. I will confirm safe receipt and Almighty God will protect you from any fears you will have.

As you are military man of action and war hero with many medals, I want to compliment you on your style of writing. It is very fine. Truly, it can be model for the young people. Only one thing, the last two words in last sentence are not need to be there so I cross them out. Trust this is fine with you. I thank you for choosing me out of all people on the internet and look forward to hearing from you immediately at your earliest convenience.
 

---

Posted by Zappa (# 8433) on :
 


Ooooh ... brilliantissimo!
 

---

Posted by jedijudy (# 333) on :
 
Ooh! I have a friend, too!

quote:

---

URGENT AND CONFFIDENSCIAL

---

quote:

---

I wish to know if we can work together with one spirit. i would like you to stand as the beneficiary to my deceased client Mr. Morris Thompson Kogan, who made some deposits of $9.700, 000 (Nine Million Seven Hundred Thousand United states dollars) with my bank he died with out registering any nex of kin

---

quote:

---

You can visit this website to confirm my information's to you at
Egypt Airline flight. website deleted he died without any registered next of kin and as such fund now have an open beneficiary so i want you to stand as one of the family member of late Mr. Morris Thompson Kogan to lam the money out from the bank, the bank must transfer this fund into your account without any much protocols on the way because i will be here to cover you up with my possition in the bank but i dont want the bank directors to be awiar that i am the one that conatct you.

---

quote:

---

if you are interested to work with me in this business transaction do let me know so that i can give you all the comprehensive details on what we are to do for the funds to be wired into your account, before my meeting with you for the disbursement of the fund in the ratio of 60% for me and 40% for you, i urgently hope to get your response as soon as possible as to enable us expedite action immediately without delay.

---

quote:

---

i want you to stand as one of the family member of late Mr. Morris Thompson Kogan to lam the money out from the bank

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by jedijudy:
It sounds dreadful. But why should I check Egypt Airline? Is there a round trip ticket waiting for me?!

---

No, the money's most likely hidden in one of the Pyramids. (You must have heard of those pyramid schemes?)
 

---

Posted by Pigwidgeon (# 10192) on :
 
I heard that the father of the 'Christmas Day Bomber' tried to warn U.S. authorities about his son. Unfortunately Dad was a banker in Nigeria. I can just imagine him sending an email to the F.B.I. and when they discover it's from a Nigerian banker they file it as spam.
 

---

Posted by Joyeux (# 3851) on :
 
My new best friend doesn't even know my name, or anything about me.


Dear Beneficiary
This is to officially inform you that your fund has been duly approved and
programmed for you via ATM Card after due reconciliation with the Audit
Report of the year ended. Your Personal Identification Number is 0920.
The ATM Visa Card is Valued at $7.5M you are advised to contact the
ATM/Department, Access bank plc nigeria . Contact the Treasurer, Secretary,
Director of Access bank plc nigeria , for further direction on how to receive Your
ATM Card. Contact information is as below; Email, Respond immediately with
the under listed Information?s for clarity and avoidance of error; For more
information you can call Mr. ross smith on this phone number :
+2347-8024778322
(1). FULL NAME,
(2). ADDRESS,
(3). PHONE NUMBERS,
(4). STATE/COUNTRY,
(5). OCCUPATION,
(6). SEX, AGE,
Prompt response recommended for immediate attention,
Regards,
MRS. FARIDA MZAMBER WAZIR
EFCC Executive Chairman,
Investigation Nigeria.
Contact the ATM/Department, ACCESS BANK PLC NIGERIA
Name: MR. ross smith
Treasurer, Secretary,
 

---

Posted by Zappa (# 8433) on :
 
Gosh, MR. ross smith is a Very Important Person™ - secretary, treasurer and phone answerer of such an august institution

OTOH, MRS. FARIDA MZAMBER WAZIR may not know you by name, but she clearly understands the joy you will experience at this Very Good News ...
 

---

Posted by Joyeux (# 3851) on :
 
It looks as though they have some competition, though... This group wants to avoid the "fraud stars".

Attn; Beneficiary:

The Board of International Monetary Fund/World Bank and Federal Ministry of Finance Benin Republic are here to notify you of your payment inherited funds of $1.7M USD have arranged to be transfer to you through HEADQUARTER WESTERN UNION SERVICE After the meeting held on 28th of FEBRUARY 2010. with His Excellence the PRESIDENT OF REPUBLIC DU BENIN (DR YAYI BONI) to avoid paying money to the fraud stars that is going on through the global or fraud stars Bankers, and you are required to reconfirm your name and address were you want your fund to be send through HEADQUARTER WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER.

The maximum amount you will be receiving each day starting from tomorrow is the sum of US$5000.00.until the total fund is finished. In order to resolve this problem, please email Western Union Money Transfer Solicitors Fund Verification Department:

And We have already transfer your first $5000.00 so Contact Foreign Operation Manager western union DR. WILLIWM KALU on the M.T.C.N for your picking up with info below.

CONTACT: DR. WILLIWM KALU
FORIEGN OPERATION MANAGER
E-mail: (western_unionpickup@qatar.io)
Phone: 00229-984-868-53

Yours in service.
Mr Andy Ugo, Finance Minister.
F?d?ral Republic of Benin.
 

---

Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :
 
Well I'm glad the government of Benin is on top of things.

Even if their equivalent of Chancellor of the Exchequer is maybe spending a wee bit too much time emailing random people off the internet.

Do you suppose that's what they do at the Treasury here after a hard day's counting? Alastair and a few of the lads write off to people in Lagos offering them shares in the Bank of England on receipt of credit card details? I mean, it's worth a try.
 

---

Posted by Pigwidgeon (# 10192) on :
 
This is one I've never seen before -- I'm accused of sending "Three men and a Lady' (wasn't that a movie???) to claim my money. And they know it was me. But the email was sent to "undisclosed recipients"!

quote:

---

ABBEY NATIONAL BANK PLC EAST LINTON BRANCH ABBEY NATIONAL,
HOUSE 2 TRITON SQUARE REGENT'S PLACE, LONDON, UNITED KINGDOM.
FOREIGN OPERATIONS DEPARTMENT.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Atten: Beneficiary

Definitely, I know that this letter will be a surprising one to you.

Firstly, I will like to introduce myself formally as Mr.Anthonio Lorenzo, The Chief Financial Officer and Executive Director Abbey National Bank Plc. (A.N.B).

You are been officially contacted by me today because your Funds were Re-deposited into the "Federal Suspense Account" of (A.N.B) few month, because you did not Claim your funds as the rightful beneficiary in our corresponding bank.
Well known to all, The Abbey National Bank is the mother Bank of all commercial Banks here in London
This morning at about ( 9:00am Standard Pacific Time) I was alerted by my Secretary that Three men and a Lady were at my Office reception waiting to see me and so I told my Secretary to let them in.

To my surprise they were two Canadians and one London Attorney, and they introduced themselves as (Mr. Tim Parker, Mr. Roland Gulf, both from Canada ), and accompanied with them was a London Attorney with the name (BARRISTER JOHNSON DUKKY). And Miss Rose Joy.
Really these men were unexpected by me because their visit was impromptu. I had to ask them why they came to see me in person and they said that they were here to collect the Inheritance Bill Sum which rightfully belongs to you, on your behalf. These foreigners actually claimed this beyond reasonable doubts.

At this development I asked them who authorized them to come down to London for the Collection of this Payment and they told me that you asked them to come and collect this funds on your Behalf. Infect this was the biggest shock that this Bank have ever received so far because your funds is still in the "Federal Suspense Account" of A.N.B, yet you sent these men to come and collect this Funds on your behalf without notifying us.

The Bank do not understand why you sent these men to come and Collect your Funds on your behalf. If actually you want them to help you collect your funds, at least you should have informed me as the Chief Financial Officer and Executive Director of this Bank.

They actually tendered some vital documents which proved that you actually sent them for the collection of these Funds. Honestly, it really baffles me that you took such decision without my consent.

Here is the document which they tendered to this Bank today:

1. LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION.
2. AFFIDAVIT OF CLIAM.
3. ORDER TO RELEASE.

Actually, these documents which they tendered to this Noble Bank are a clear Proof that you sent them to Collect this Funds for you. Finally, I told them to come back by Monday morning and they promised to come back.

As the Chief Financial Officer of this Noble Bank, I was supposed to Release this Funds to them but I refused to do so because I wanted to hear from you first. Due to the Nature of my job, I will not want to make any mistake in releasing these funds to anyone except you whom is the recognized bonifires beneficiary to these Funds.

Kindly clarify us on this issue before we make this Payment to these foreigners whom came on your behalf.

In receipt of this confidential Letter, you are required to get back to this Bank immediately by email.

Note: that we have only 3 working days to here from you so as soon as we here from you your fund will be wired into your account within 24 banking hours.

SECURITY ALERT

To avoid any Discrepancy and Double Entry Of Claims you are required to Keep every information confidential to yourself, keep off entirely from PUBLIC UNTIL YOUR TRANSFER IS COMPLETED.

Mr.Anthonio Lorenzo
Chief Financial Officer and Executive Director
ABBEY NATIONAL BANK PLC

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by jedijudy:
Ooh! I have a friend, too!

quote:

---

URGENT AND CONFFIDENSCIAL

---

That's a great start!

---

quote:

---

Dear friend,

It is understandable that you might be a little bit apprehensive because you do not know me, Please forgive this unusual manner to contact you, but this particular letter/email is of exceptional and very private nature.

---

quote:

---

My name is Felix Ikpakpa,formal head of (secret)security to the then (late)president of Gabon,OMAR BONGO, who died Last june: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/8090056.stm
I am sending you this mail because I want us to carry out a business transaction of($12.5million)together.

---

quote:

---

Please if you are interested,contact me through my private email below:
EMail;- ikpakpaigho@aim.com

Sincerely,
F.Ikpakpa

---

quote:

---

Greetings,

It is understandable that you might be a little bit apprehensive because you do not know me, Please forgive this unusual manner to contact you, but this particular letter/email is of exceptional and very private nature,as by virtue of my vantage position in Hang Seng Bank Ltd -Hong Kong i have a lucrative business proposal of mutual interest to share with you.There is no way for me to know whether I will be properly understood, but it is my duty to write and reach out to you,TRUSTING that you will give this proposal a positive consideration.

I am Mr.Jon Chan a South Korean and one of the Director of Hang Seng Bank Limited here in Hong-Kong.I will need you to assist me in executing a business project from our bank worth US$25.5 Million.These funds were deposited with our bank by a customer of our bank who is a national{citizen} of your country/region,who unfortunately died in the December 2004 Asia Tsunami disaster. I shall furnish you with more information’s about this operation when l receive your reply.

Should you be interested, please send me those information’s

1.Full names,
2.Age
3.Occupation,
4.Private phone number,
5.Current residential address.

Via this email address :- jonchochan@aim.com


Your earliest response to this letter will be highly appreciated.

Kind regards,
Mr.Jon Chan
Hang Seng Bank Limited
Hong Kong.{Asia}
Email:- jonchochan@aim.com

---

quote:

---

As you read this,I don't want you to feel
sorry for me ...

---

quote:

---

because I believe everyone will
die someday.

---

quote:

---

Please do not be surprise the way I got your contact, its obvious that this proposal will come to you as a big surprise.This is because we have not met you before but I am inspired to send you this email, my Name is Rita Osborne suffering from cancerous ailment.I am married to Sir
Williams Osborne an Englishman who is dead. My husband was into private practice all his life before his death.we live together as husband and wife which lasted for three decades without a child. My husband died after a protracted illness,My husband and I made a vow to uplift the down-trodden and the less-privileged individuals as he had passion for persons who can not help themselves due to physical disability or financial predicament.

---

quote:

---

42 Dryden Street,
Leicester, L15,
England

---

Has that moneygrabbing bastard Brown shortened the UK post codes now, too? And the only Dryden St I can find in Leicester is LE1 3QE. Oh, and damn it, a quick Google earth of that address provides a vacant parking lot in a light industrial estate.

Just another of life's disappointments, I guess.
 

---

Posted by jedijudy (# 333) on :
 
This one will just tug at your heartstrings.

quote:

---

hooper lee says: Dear Beloved,Mi querido amigo I am Mr. Hooper Curtis Lee, at present I am suffering from throat cancer and have a hole in the heart. My attending medical practitioner has just informed me that my days are counted because of my degraded health.

---

quote:

---

My matrimonial situation is such as I do not have a wife and even less children to whom I could bequeath my heritage.

---

Now, couldn't you just cry? He has less than zero children.

quote:

---

It is because of this I would like gracious and with the aim of help stripped to give you this known as heritage rising to a value of $9.5 million US dollars for you to use it to help the orphans, victims of war, HIV/Aids, and expand the work of God in your country, after receiving the fund you shall have 10% for yourself and 5% to cove any expenses you will incur during the transfer of this fund to you in your country and the remaining 85% be for the said project.

---

quote:

---

As you can see this is a very hard to take but I have no option than to will out this deposit before my major operation in few days from now therefore I would like you to think about it very well and forward to me your complete data, full name, address, age, occupation and telephone number, etc. I count on your goodwill and especially the good use of these funds for your endeavours. God bless you and your family. My regards, Mr. Hooper Curtis Lee

---

Yes, indeed. This is a very hard to take. What a great idea! I should will out my deposit, too. Do you find that works for you? I'm just really, really surprised that you need all my complete data. We're such good friends, and I was very hurt that you didn't remember me on my birthday.

ps...if your days are counted, I wouldn't bother with a major operation if I were you. Oh. I'm the operation! I get it now!
 

---

Posted by Oferyas (# 14031) on :
 
For those who want to perfect this art form, there is professional training and support available, such as this
http://j-walk.com/other/conf/index.htm
 

---

Posted by jedijudy (# 333) on :
 
I now have the Real Deal™!! A proposal!!

quote:

---

Hello Love,

How are you doing today?
I am Dr.Benjamin John by name ,a royal naval doctor from UK.I am 40yrs old and have a daughter but with no wife.

I came across your contact in online dating site and decided to write you to let you know that you match my criteria for a woman that I will like to spend the rest of my life with.I am not here for games or child's play,if you know you are for real and ready to settle down, please write me back or call me through my direct mobile no +447-92404-9552 or email me (infodrben-johnson@yahoo.co.uk)

Patiently waiting for your reply.

Dr.Benjamin J.
National naval base
hospital,United kingdom.

CAN I BE UR MAN

---

It must be true love! Even if he talks funny, I'm sure he must be "for real", too.

So, when am I supposed to give him all my money?
 

---

Posted by Zappa (# 8433) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by jedijudy:
I am not here for games ...

---

Bugger. How dull.
 

---

Posted by Avila (# 15541) on :
 
Hey I have a very keen friend - so keen he sent this 4 times!!

quote:

---

Attn: Friend, I am Samuel Reid (Esq.) Attorney and secretary to my late deceased clientof Gulf Stream crude oil. Prior to his unexpected death in August 2006deposited $15.5M USD on trust with a Bank. Eventually, he died in a planecrash and since his death nobody has Apply for the claims of his estate asthe next of kin. He died intestate. It is a situation I have monitored closely. Now having monitored thisdeposit and managed it over the years before his death and hence nobodyhas showed up as the next of kin for the past years. I now solicit foryour assistance to present you as the next of kin as every otherarrangement has been concluded by me. I am only waiting for a foreigner totake possession of the deposit. There is no risk attached to it as theentire document required for claims will be obtained legally by me as hisproxy. I cannot make claim regarding the funds, all I have to do is to donatesomebody as his next of kin and beneficiary to make claim of the said fundfor us to share as Partners. I therefore request you to confirm yourinterest by a return message and I will forward details and moreinformation on how to go about the subject matter. To facilitate a rather more secured link with you, kindly indulge me withthe following: 1). Full Names, sex and Address2). Telephone, Fax and Cell phone numbers Your respond must be direct to: Email: sreidassociate@gmail.com This project is ready for execution as soon as I hear from you. I lookforward to your swift response to this letter. Sincerely Yours. Samuel Reid (Esq.)Principal Partner (Samuel Reid & Associates)

---

not sure what relevance my experience of sex has to do with this no risk transaction
 

---

Posted by Pigwidgeon (# 10192) on :
 

quote:

---

all I have to do is to donatesomebody as his next of kin and beneficiary...

---

If I were you I'd want to know to whom he plans to donate you.

 

---

Posted by Gwai (# 11076) on :
 
Avila, I just want to know how he knows you are next of kin without knowing your name!
 

---

Posted by Zappa (# 8433) on :
 
He DNA tested Avila's web-print ...
 

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