Thread: Someone Please Call Me To Hell Board: Oblivion / Ship of Fools.
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Posted by Tortuf (# 3784) on
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Someone please call me to Hell. I have grievously sinned and must be punished.
After a late night bout of drinking tonic water with Gin in it I find myself with a large gothic letter "I Love Lucy" on my stomach and god only knows what on my back. I know it is there because of the pain, but I am afraid to look.
And, oh yes, I have joined the Westboro Baptist Church. I even have a nekkid picture of Shirley Phelps Roper. She is crazy, but she is kinda hot.
More than that, I have agreed with the Pope that non Catholics might get to Heaven.
And, oh yes, I have posted drivel all over the boards and my husband says I am gay, whatever that means.
Sister Sarky, save me.
Posted by Doublethink (# 1984) on
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Well that's constructive I don't think.
Posted by Jon in the Nati (# 15849) on
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quote:
After a late night bout of drinking tonic water with Gin in it
The problem with gin and tonic is that it has tonic in it. Try bourbon.
Posted by EtymologicalEvangelical (# 15091) on
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quote:
Originally posted by Tortuf
I have posted drivel all over the boards
Funny, but I didn't think telling the truth was a sin. ![[Confused]](confused.gif)
Posted by stonespring (# 15530) on
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Yay!!!!! I get my wish even when they delete my thread! This is awesome!
Posted by stonespring (# 15530) on
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Ok so now that I know what I'm not allowed to do, I'll do something that I am apparently allowed to do but much worse.
I am not saying these things as a form of therapy. I am Asti g these things so that more people will hate me. Yay hatred! It's the only thing I deserve.
I will repeat that I used my mother as a non-sexual mattress as a child. I could not fall asleep without my arms and legs wrapped around her and the lights, tv and fan on or otherwise the Devil would come to take me back to Hell where I came from.
My mother used to believe that I was the reincarnation of her father and that her father had sexually abused her. It was her uncle, not her father that sexually abused her and her sisters when they were children but some energy healer had put it in her head that her father had abused her too. She apologized to me years later but that was only after telling me many times when I was thrashing on the floor and raving and screaming like a lunatic that I was her father and not her son.
When I went through puberty I started sleeping in my own room thank God but I thought that fantasizing about anyone else would be fantasizing about rape since no one would ever consent to having sex with a monster like me so I fantasizes about having sex with myself!
My father used to sprinkle cologne on me when I was having my fits because he thought it was some kind of holy water.
My mother told me when I was a teenager that she received no pleasure from sex and that it is ok for two very close blood relatives to be sexually attracted to each other as long as they do not act on it. Why did she tell me! Because I asked her!
Now read this and tell me that the fact that I have shared these things that should never be shared with strangers on the Internet where nothing that is posted can be taken back ever does not make me someone who does not deserve hatred and abuse forever. This is Hell, isn't it?
I don't want to work out my issues. I want you to despise me. And the smartest thing you can do is ignore me because all I do is cause suffering to anyone who enters my life.
I do appreciate the mockery though. Seriously and with no sarcasm. I am an attention whore, but you know that by now.
I also am loved and supported by many people including a few who would die for me. It's sickening.
Posted by EtymologicalEvangelical (# 15091) on
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quote:
Originally posted by stonespring
Now read this and tell me that the fact that I have shared these things that should never be shared with strangers on the Internet where nothing that is posted can be taken back ever does not make me someone who does not deserve hatred and abuse forever.
Yes, it's true that nothing that is posted can be taken back, but let's face it... one more turd in the sewer isn't really going to be noticed for very long, is it?
quote:
I don't want to work out my issues. I want you to despise me. And the smartest thing you can do is ignore me because all I do is cause suffering to anyone who enters my life.
There is something strangely comforting about "The Big Sulk". If I indulge in it, it makes me feel sooooo important. I mean: I can even get God Himself to hate me!! I must really be that special and important.
Sorry to burst your bubble, but the truth is really very boring and humiliating:
God loves you. Yes, it's hell, isn't it, this 'love' thing.
Yep.
And that means that you sodding well have to grow up and take responsibility for your life, knowing that Someone actually gives a damn about helping you.
By the way... all your crap from the past is just sooo boring. I mean, I could tell you a few stories, but I won't. It's too narcissistic. I mean, I might even give the impression that I have suffered more than most people - and, oh, what a life I've had (don't you secretly admire me for my suffering? I really want you to think: "Just how did you cope with all that?" Yeah, that would make me feel sooooo special!!).
Actually, we've all been through various things, and frankly, no one's interested.
So off you toddle, and go and find someone else to feel sorry for you, 'cos I don't. *yawn*
Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on
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Stonespring, I'd advise your husband to brush up on exorcism, but I'm afraid that without your demons you might have no personality at all.
Torfuf: ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
Posted by passer (# 13329) on
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quote:
Originally posted by Tortuf:
Someone please call me to Hell.
But aren't you a lawyer? If so, this sounds like attempted entrapment, so that you can sue someone and get the money for the gin and tats. This is a typical WBC ploy....
Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on
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No need to slow down on the highway to look at accidents when one can just log onto the ship in the comfort of one's own home. (Or 'office cubicle' as the case may be.)
Posted by Sarkycow (# 1012) on
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Do you need your demons casting out Tortuf? Or can you get rid of Sine by yourself ![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on
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(FYI, stonespring – there are numerous bondage websites you might want to check out if you have not already. Obviously you have been VERY BAD and deserve to be punished.)
Posted by Grits (# 4169) on
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It is what keeps some of us hanging on, knowing that no matter how sucky our lives get, there's always someone here on the Ship who will purport to have it worse.
Posted by QLib (# 43) on
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quote:
Originally posted by stonespring:
Now read this and tell me that the fact that I have shared these things that should never be shared with strangers on the Internet where nothing that is posted can be taken back ever does not make me someone who does not deserve hatred and abuse forever.
(Too many negatives - confusing) Arguably, and assuming that what you've posted is true, it makes you a bit of an idiot, and therefore allows a lot of people to feel good about themselves by feeling superior to you, if only in this one respect. quote:
I don't want to work out my issues. I want you to despise me.
You're out of luck. quote:
And the smartest thing you can do is ignore me
I promise to try after this, though it's going to be hard if you carry on pissing all over other people's threads. quote:
because all I do is cause suffering to anyone who enters my life.
a, I seriously doubt that and b, I'm not planning to enter your life.
[ 29. May 2013, 16:46: Message edited by: QLib ]
Posted by Tortuf (# 3784) on
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Stonerspring
y
I Was Poking Fun Not Giving You A Forum To Make An Ass Of Yourself Again.
Posted by Tortuf (# 3784) on
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Damn Phone
Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on
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“It is a poor workman who blames his tools”
Posted by Sarkycow (# 1012) on
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Tortuf - stupidity will never go out of fashion though. Which is good news for the hellhosts I reckon.
Meanwhile, I could fix your post, but that would be less fun than leaving it as a testament to your annoying phone.
Posted by no prophet (# 15560) on
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stonespring:
If you're not pulling our legs and making stuff up for fun, you need some professional help. If you're not pulling our legs, you've already had some professional help, but either whomever you consulted were not very good at helping you, or you were noncompliant.
Playing out your personal dramas to 'hook' someone shipboard is a relatively silly idea. This apparently is your second attempt. Please consider attending to your troubles responsibly.
Yes, I know, not a very hellish response.
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on
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quote:
Originally posted by EtymologicalEvangelical:
Sorry to burst your bubble, but the truth is really very boring and humiliating:
God loves you. Yes, it's hell, isn't it, this 'love' thing.
Yep.
And that means that you sodding well have to grow up and take responsibility for your life, knowing that Someone actually gives a damn about helping you.
By the way... all your crap from the past is just sooo boring. I mean, I could tell you a few stories, but I won't. It's too narcissistic. I mean, I might even give the impression that I have suffered more than most people - and, oh, what a life I've had (don't you secretly admire me for my suffering? I really want you to think: "Just how did you cope with all that?" Yeah, that would make me feel sooooo special!!).
There is so much weird shit that adults can get up to with children when they think they can get away with it. There's abuse,and then there's using a full palette of various types of abuse as a form of artistic expression.
Those of us who spent time under the care and guidance of Hieronymus Fucking Bosch have two choices-- they can internalize all that crap,and attempt to please living- or- dead relatives by letting them know that their abuse did indeed crush them flat, or they can say "Fuck you, I am not you, I am better than you, and I will never be you."
So, stonespring, by saying you deserve to be hated because Mommy Said So implies that people are chained to the destiny their parents hand them. Is that true of other people who have weird mothers who got them caught up in bizarre psychosexual crap, or as EE says are you just some kind of special little snowflake somehow cosmically exempt from the kind of compassion everybody else in that position deserves?
And I assure you they are many.
If the latter, you can just sit on your thumb with that nonsense. Because by taking that position whether you like it or not, you are taking a position about the situation in general, and joining ranks with the abusers.
[ 29. May 2013, 19:22: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]
Posted by balaam (# 4543) on
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quote:
Originally posted by Grits:
...knowing that no matter how sucky our lives get, there's always someone here on the Ship who will purport to have it worse.
I read that as, "knowing that no matter how sulky our lives get,"
And you know what, that's true too. ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on
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quote:
My father used to sprinkle cologne on me when I was having my fits because he thought it was some kind of holy water.
The Brut.
Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on
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If there is a God, Pyx_e, he will assuredly punish such attempts at humour.
Posted by EtymologicalEvangelical (# 15091) on
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quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves
...or as EE says are you just some kind of special little snowflake somehow cosmically exempt from the kind of compassion everybody else in that position deserves?
I tend to think that the people who deserve compassion are those who have genuinely suffered, as opposed to those who most probably haven't (as much as they claim) - you know, the kind who keep going on about it, especially in a nauseatingly manipulative way.
stonespring's suffering is stonespring's comfort blanket.
I really wouldn't want to deprive the poor soul of that now, would I?
Posted by stonespring (# 15530) on
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Ugh. I'm not supposed to ask people to hate me anymore. So I won't.
To clarify things, I am not blaming my current self on anything my parents did. I dot think they abused me at all. My point is that I abused them repeatedly, and that I continue to abuse them all the time by doing things like post what I did here, which is all true. I have narcissistic personality disorder, which is the same thing that serial killers and mass murderong dictators have. My husband is a surrogate for my parents and he and they know that. Except I get to have real sex with him, when he wants to that is, which has almost always been never, even since before he met me.
I think I joined the Catholic Church because my mother hates the Catholic Church because she thinks it have her mother the moral sensibilities to not stop the sexual abuse of my mom and her sisters by their mentally challenged uncle. My grandmother I am told did not want her brother to be forced to leave their house and she probably did not want the shame of the whole thing to become public. Same old story everyone has heard. My mother cries tears of pain every time she sees Christians praying or singing - choral music of every kind makes her weep bitterly (not happily). So naturally I became very active in Choirs an eventually the Catholic Church. No past life you are my father who raped me (although he didn't really rape her) there!
My Most Reverend Husband has actually performed an exorcism - not on me - which he said was very successful. It wouldn't work on me though. I would just use it as a fun version if role play like I did when my miter used to ask me why her arm hurt so much and I would tell her it was because of past lives in Atlantis and black magic. She actually believes the reason I have any problems is that I have intuitive gifts and that I refuse to use them.
I've always believed that God loves me and He should. I have done some things with my life. I have a degree from a good university although my grades were awful and it took
Me 8 years and millions of dollars of therapy rehab and hospital bills to get it. I now finally have a job that I did not get through my Dad's nepotism (I managed to burn that bridge by having a fit in the office that scared the other employees so much that the told my dad in tears tha I could not work there anymore - not that I ever did any work there). My current job is only a temp position and what I do mostly consists of telling cancer patients and their families, with hardly any training, that we don't have the funds to lay for the medications they need to live (gotta love the US healthcare system!). People at my parish think I'm some kind of super organized prudish pedantic leader destined for success, just like people at my high school did. It all feels like a facade though because I keep breaking down every few months. It just doesn't register with people because I don't fit the type of a f***-up they have in their minds. For one, I've never used drugs in my life.
I'm angry that no one will ever issue me am ultimatum to shape up or get out. All my support is so unconditional that it's suffocating. "Hey Mom, remember the time I threatened to rape you and the Dean of Freshmen at [Top 10 University] heard and I left that school and we drove across the country together? Good times." "Oh honey you're scaring me again. You should let your father give you more money." Did I mention my parents are bankrupt and I feel I'm partly to blame? But my Dad is still going to be president of his home country and will get me and my husband some cushy official position and all the children we could ever want to adopt. Just cut me off already!
I predict 4 possible responses to this:
-nothing (ignore the bastard an maybe he'll go away)
- TL;DR (or yawn)
- get over yourself
-Only you can make your own destiny. Stop blaming your failures on other people.
And I am compliant with my meds and therapy. I also don't have a real diagnosis - just borderline tendencies and narcissistic ego functioning, blah blah. I've always been too high functioning to fit into a diagnostic box. I think laziness iand an utter lack of self-discipline is mostly to blame for everything.
My life is so much better than most people's. It is true though that insults make me happy and compliments make me angry. No one insults me except my husband.
[ 30. May 2013, 03:54: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]
Posted by Ariston (# 10894) on
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Quick question for ya, stoney: given the fact that there are more than a few Hellions in this part of the Ship, fucked up people who give no quarter and expect none in return, sickos who sometimes thrive off another's suffering, how does it make you feel to know that you're giving them what they want? You know, that you're doing something that is in a certain light good, providing a service to people, making a hard day more bearable, or otherwise contributing to someone's transitory happiness?
Look, by offering yourself up as Hellbait, you're doing something with your time and with yourself. Call it fucked up, but you're doing something good. As ample posts above show, for the nutjobs who hang out here, you've made something of yourself.
In other words, whatever else you say, you're not worthless.
Congratulations!
So really, we can't despise you. By hijacking a lame Hell thread (look, someone had to call it lame, it's in The Rules, okay?), you've given us a chance to be witty and banter with each other, to polish our logical chops, and show you that you've defeated yourself.
Ponder that for a while. In your quest to be called worthless, you have given yourself greater worth—and, the fact is, the more you beat your breast, the more you beg us to insult you, the more worth you will attain.
Sorry, but you can't win. Have a nice day!
Posted by Tortuf (# 3784) on
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stonerspring,
You are making this up. I am sure someone who cared could diagnose whatever it is that is wrong with you. It won't be me because I don't care. You are already on my do not read list.
Others here have given you decent advice. My advice to you is to quit making up unlikely crap in the hopes that people will believe you so you can get your jollies.
Of course, if you weren't making stuff up you might not be worth reading anyway. You may never find out.
I am sorry I started this thread. I had hoped it would be an opportunity to have a little fun. However, it seems to have been hijacked by someone who cares not about the community, but feeling superior to the community; hence the lame ass stories.
There have been much better trolls on the Ship than you.
Posted by comet (# 10353) on
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Masochist: beat me! Beat me!
Sadist: No.
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on
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[ADMIN]
Stonespring, you may notice that I edited a bit of your latest post. Be very careful of other people's location information. You may not care who knows where you are/ have been, but I'm willing to bet the Dean of [wherever] does not want to be tied to this conversation.
Kelly Alves
Admin
[ 30. May 2013, 03:58: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
quote:
My father used to sprinkle cologne on me when I was having my fits because he thought it was some kind of holy water.
The Brut.
(on a non-Adminly note) SS, Pyx_e is an emissary from the Great God Perspective, and his guiding light will show you the way.
Seriously how can anyone have any power over you when in your mind you have dubbed them "The Brut"?
Kelly// Daughter of Captain Queeg.
Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on
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You expect too much from Pyx_e, he never makes scents.
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on
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Your attitude stinks.
(OK, I'll stop.)
Posted by Earwig (# 12057) on
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quote:
Originally posted by stonespring:
I have narcissistic personality disorder, which is the same thing that serial killers and mass murderong dictators have.
Just sayin', it's also the thing that I guess quite a few shipmates have, and the thing that lots of brilliant and wonderful mothers and fathers and brothers and sisters have. Our mental does not have to define us.
Posted by Patdys (# 9397) on
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quote:
Originally posted by Ariston:
Quick question for ya, stoney: given the fact that there are more than a few Hellions in this part of the Ship, fucked up people who give no quarter and expect none in return, sickos who sometimes thrive off another's suffering, how does it make you feel to know that you're giving them what they want?
Do you seriously believe this hyperbole? If so, facilitating it is seriously fucked up.
Posted by Tortuf (# 3784) on
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Somebody please delete the damn thread.
Posted by passer (# 13329) on
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quote:
Originally posted by stonespring:
I have narcissistic personality disorder, which is the same thing that serial killers and mass murderong dictators have.
This means that you are very special. You might like to go and find a clear pool into which you could gaze. And stay there.
quote:
Originally posted by stonespring:
I also don't have a real diagnosis - just borderline tendencies and narcissistic ego functioning, blah blah.
Now you seem confused. This means that you are very special. You might like to go and find a fresh poo into which you could step. It would provide a handy explanation for the smell that surrounds you.
quote:
Originally posted by stonespring:
People at my parish think I'm some kind of super organized prudish pedantic leader destined for success
This means that you are very special. If they really think that, it means that they are very special too. You might like to go and find a fool who will enunciate that assessment clearly. You could feed off one another.
quote:
Originally posted by stonespring:
I'm angry that no one will ever issue me am ultimatum to shape up or get out.
This means that you are very special. You might like to shape up or get out. (You're welcome.)
I'm sure that you're already aware that your forum name is an anagram of "strong penis". You need to take yourself in hand, and get a grip.
Oh, and don't forget - it's all about you!
Posted by Sarkycow (# 1012) on
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Attention whore wants attention. In other news, Pope is still Catholic.
Posted by Tubbs (# 440) on
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quote:
Originally posted by stonespring:
I'm angry that no one will ever issue me am ultimatum to shape up or get out.
Admin Tiara on
Well, it looks like this is your lucky day. If you want to continue posting self indulgent, nonsensical twaddle about how messed up you are, then get a blog and post it there. Carry on doing it on The Ship and we'll see you in a few weeks.
Admin Tiara off
Tubbs
[ 30. May 2013, 11:40: Message edited by: Tubbs ]
Posted by Anselmina (# 3032) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Tortuf:
stonerspring,
You are making this up.
Looks that way. Probably a little 'self-abuse' going on at the same, too. Mental or physical, makes no odds.
Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Sarkycow:
Tortuf - stupidity will never go out of fashion though. Which is good news for the hellhosts I reckon..
What the fuck is this thread about?
No, hang on, don't tell me. I'm on holiday.
Posted by Ariston (# 10894) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Patdys:
quote:
Originally posted by Ariston:
Quick question for ya, stoney: given the fact that there are more than a few Hellions in this part of the Ship, fucked up people who give no quarter and expect none in return, sickos who sometimes thrive off another's suffering, how does it make you feel to know that you're giving them what they want?
Do you seriously believe this hyperbole? If so, facilitating it is seriously fucked up.
As much as I believe any other hyperbole.
Posted by rolyn (# 16840) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by orfeo:
What the fuck is this thread about?
Excellent question .
I may be wrong but I think it's about someone who wants to be told that they are a shit and deserve to be roasted in Hell.
Not too sure how long we've got to keep it going before they go away.
Posted by mousethief (# 953) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by rolyn:
quote:
Originally posted by orfeo:
What the fuck is this thread about?
Excellent question .
I may be wrong but I think it's about someone who wants to be told that they are a shit and deserve to be roasted in Hell.
Not too sure how long we've got to keep it going before they go away.
Stoneshit is using us to get his/her self-hating rocks off.
Posted by Patdys (# 9397) on
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quote:
Originally posted by Ariston:
As much as I believe any other hyperbole.
Nice. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
Posted by Otter (# 12020) on
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A hyperbole is an ironic section, which is formed by slicing a double moan with a complane. Other ironic sections are the parabollocks, the ellipsis, and the circle of confusion.
Posted by balaam (# 4543) on
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quote:
Originally posted by mousethief:
Stoneshit is using us to get his/her self-hating rocks off.
You don't get it, do you mousey.
The best way to be mean to a attention seeker is to ignore them.
Posted by Ariston (# 10894) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Otter:
A hyperbole is an ironic section, which is formed by slicing a double moan with a complane. Other ironic sections are the parabollocks, the ellipsis, and the circle of confusion.
You forgot about the degenerate ironics—like when the circle of confusion or ellipsis become so infinitely small they eventually turn into a point.
Posted by Doublethink (# 1984) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by comet:
Masochist: beat me! Beat me!
Sadist: No.
On that basis we really ought to move this thread to All Saints.
Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by rolyn:
quote:
Originally posted by orfeo:
What the fuck is this thread about?
Excellent question .
I may be wrong but I think it's about someone who wants to be told that they are a shit and deserve to be roasted in Hell.
Not too sure how long we've got to keep it going before they go away.
If it's a male, about 2 minutes.
Posted by Pooks (# 11425) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Doublethink:
quote:
Originally posted by comet:
Masochist: beat me! Beat me!
Sadist: No.
On that basis we really ought to move this thread to All Saints.
Oh, yes please. Stonespring deserves a dedicated prayer thread all to herself.
Posted by Twilight (# 2832) on
:
quote:
Except I get to have real sex with him[my husband], when he wants to that is, which has almost always been never, even since before he met me.
My husband never wanted to have sex with me before he met me either. He said I was his fantasy girl but that's clearly just his imagination.
Posted by Evensong (# 14696) on
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Oh Sweet Jesus.
Way too much information people.
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on
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2 minutes, orfeo? Really?
Posted by Huia (# 3473) on
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Stonespring, why not get your own private board then you can play by/with yourself to your heart's content
Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
2 minutes, orfeo? Really?
I'm assuming straight male, of course. The ones that women traditionally complain about.
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on
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Oh right.
(I'm telling you, when you pray to St. Onan, use that time to practice endurance.)
Posted by Twilight (# 2832) on
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quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:
Oh Sweet Jesus.
Way too much information people.
Those were jokes based on the quote from Stonespring's post on page one, not deep confessions. Her line struck me funny because it reminded me of Ogden Nash's poem "I met a man who wasn't there," etc. How could he have not wanted to have sex with her before he had ever met her? Plus fantasies are in the imagination. Get it? Sigh. It's not even 7A.M. and I'm tired.
Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
Oh right.
(I'm telling you, when you pray to St. Onan, use that time to practice endurance.)
He's a saint now? Boy, those liberal theologians can twist scripture in amazing ways.
PS also, I'm protestant. I ain't praying to no saint. Oh God Oh God is as far as I go.
[ 31. May 2013, 14:10: Message edited by: orfeo ]
Posted by ExclamationMark (# 14715) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:
Oh Sweet Jesus.
Way too much information people.
Those were jokes based on the quote from Stonespring's post on page one, not deep confessions. Her line struck me funny because it reminded me of Ogden Nash's poem "I met a man who wasn't there," etc. How could he have not wanted to have sex with her before he had ever met her? Plus fantasies are in the imagination. Get it? Sigh. It's not even 7A.M. and I'm tired.
Er ..... are you SURE SS is female? I think there may be a more modern use of the idea of "husband" here .....
Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
Oh right.
(I'm telling you, when you pray to St. Onan, use that time to practice endurance.)
But Orfeo doesn't have to. As both participants are men, there should be less of a disparity in, erm, completion times.
Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on
:
Depends entirely on who is doing what to whom.
Posted by Twilight (# 2832) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by ExclamationMark:
quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
quote:
Originally posted by Evensong:
Oh Sweet Jesus.
Way too much information people.
Those were jokes based on the quote from Stonespring's post on page one, not deep confessions. Her line struck me funny because it reminded me of Ogden Nash's poem "I met a man who wasn't there," etc. How could he have not wanted to have sex with her before he had ever met her? Plus fantasies are in the imagination. Get it? Sigh. It's not even 7A.M. and I'm tired.
Er ..... are you SURE SS is female? I think there may be a more modern use of the idea of "husband" here .....
I have no idea whether he/she is male or female. It's not relevant to the posts above, is it?
Posted by Kelly Alves (# 2522) on
:
quote:
Originally posted by lilBuddha:
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
Oh right.
(I'm telling you, when you pray to St. Onan, use that time to practice endurance.)
But Orfeo doesn't have to. As both participants are men, there should be less of a disparity in, erm, completion times.
That was a rhetorical "you", I should have said, but boy, does that line have potential as a meditation device...
Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on
:
Meditation device? Would that be an additional setting; Fast, slow and meditation?
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