quote:

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Originally posted by Kaplan Corday:
... Do couples contemplating matrimony have a duty to not bequeath embarrassing wedding photos to posterity?

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Absolutely not. Wedding photographs are, to my mind, a wonderful record of what the fashion was at the time. Everyone is dressed in their best, even if to modern sartorial sensibilities that looks amusing (at our wedding my mother wore turquoise tights, to match her outfit, which was very fashionable in 1988).

If it gives a good laugh to your children and grandchildren, so much the better!
 

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Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :
 
It's for amusement, of course!

In 100 years no one will know or care who those weirdoes were in the wedding photos. Only the amusing ones will survive. Won't someone think of the great-great-grandchildren?
 

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Posted by Meg the Red (# 11838) on :
 
The 80s made for awesomely tacky weddings; even my brother's nuptials - tasteful as they were - involved teal cummerbunds. We bridesmaids wore teal georgette dresses with matching pumps, and Sarah Ferguson-esque bows clipped into our heavily-gelled hair. We were hot .

Mr. Red and I married at a historic site and dressed accordingly - if you're going to look outdated, you might as well go whole hog.
 

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Posted by Spike (# 36) on :
 
We went fro traditional and I wore morning dress. That said, the photos may still look like a period piece as it was before this dreadful fashion crept in of tying the cravat like a tie.
 

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Posted by PeteC (# 10422) on :
 
I was freshly permed in an afro, and wore a honest to God beige business suit with green attachments. My wife wore a beige dress. We dressed the children conventionally for their age. Thank Goodness, I have no pictures to remind me (she took them all when we split).
 

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Posted by BessHiggs (# 15176) on :
 
Husband #2 and I got married at a hockey game so our wedding photos feature the bride in a home white team jersey, groom in the alternate dark blue jersey, matron-of-honor, best man and pastor all in the red travel jerseys. I think they're pretty cool looking
 

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Posted by Anglo Catholic Relict (# 17213) on :
 
1987. I made my own dress from silver brocade, and based it on pictures of weddings from Ladybird fairy tales; Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty. Long silver dress, long trail, long veil. It was not fashionable then, and is perhaps a bit worse now, because sleeves are definitely never worn these days, and mine had sleeves.

H wore a lounge suit. I might have been tempted to go for something more formal, but my dad flatly refused to wear anything other than a suit.

I am pretty sure the brides of today who invariably opt for sleeveless and strapless will look immensely dated in years to come; I verged for two years, and honestly could not see the difference between any of the dresses that presented themselves. I found/find it hard to understand anyone wanting to get married half naked. As for black dresses for bridesmaids; they are not going to look good in years to come, I suspect.

[ 12. January 2014, 16:59: Message edited by: Anglo Catholic Relict ]
 

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Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Spike:
We went fro traditional and I wore morning dress. That said, the photos may still look like a period piece as it was before this dreadful fashion crept in of tying the cravat like a tie.

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quote:

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Originally posted by North East Quine:
1989. My husband and the other men wore formal kilt outfits which could be worn today without looking at all out of place. My bridesmaids and I were in very shiny satiny material, blinding white for me and a blue-y green for my bridesmaids - that does look very 1980s now.

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Yes to a lot of that. D. and his father wore lounge-suits (unlike my s-i-l, I couldn't persuade D. into a morning suit). Being English, he wouldn't wear a kilt, although his b-i-l did*, claiming some loose connection to the Campbell clan. The men on my side of the family all wore kilts, as did some of the guests (kilts weren't as common at Orkney weddings then as they are now).

Our dresses were of the shiny, satiny stuff; the bridesmaids' ones were bright, electric blue and mine was ivory, with puffy sleeves and lots of bows and pearls.

I'm very glad we got married before the strappy/strapless fashion took off; some of us just haven't got the arms for it.

* Actually he only wore it later on; he and my s-i-l travelled separately to the wedding as she couldn't get off work until the day before. He decided to come up from Kent by train, and took what he stood in (a pair of jeans and a tee-shirt), while she brought his hired kilt in her suitcase. She was held up because of fog, and didn't get there until more than half-way through the reception, so he borrowed an old brown suit that my f-i-l had brought with him.
 

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Posted by MrsBeaky (# 17663) on :
 
1976 for us and the photos (all 30 of them) are a source of hilarity to our adult daughters mainly because of my husband's hair and how ridiculously young I look. (Simple dress, empire line and puff sleeves)
Two of our daughters have had their own weddings. And one of them already finds her taste has changed significantly and says she'd do some things differently if she was doing it today....still her photos will provide her daughters with many a smile to come!
 

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Posted by The Intrepid Mrs S (# 17002) on :
 
Miss S married last year, and yes, she wore a strapless dress - except that in church she had a lace shrug, high at the front and tied at the back, with elbow-length sleeves. When she got to the reception, she took the shrug off and had effectively a different dress. Lots of people commented on the shrug - what a good idea, and how beautiful she/it looked.


My dress, from 39 years ago, had long sleeves and a high neck (with a tiny keyhole!) all trimmed with ribbon and guipure lace, and I made my bridesmaids dresses myself. They wore Viyella - imagine today's bridesmaids in Viyella! - but it was the end of October and I didn't want them to freeze.

The Dowager Mrs S still has the coat and hat she wore, and I had the devil of a job persuading her not to wear it to Miss S's wedding!

NEQ - I was thinking of doing a triptych of The Dowager's wedding photos with ours and Miss S's Great minds, hey!

Mrs. S, never going to fit that dress again!
 

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Posted by la vie en rouge (# 10688) on :
 
My wedding dress is Going To Have Sleeves, dammit. Partly because I’ve made an art form out of refusing to do anything the same way everyone else does it, but also because I think strapless dresses are highly unflattering on women who don’t have very toned arms (which is most of us).

My wedding dress will be made by my mother because making a wedding dress is one of her life’s ambitions and she may never speak to me again otherwise. I want to go with an original 1950s pattern because in the 50s it was in fashion to be a woman with a bust and waist and hips and those dresses are flattering and elegant. Also, because as I mentioned, I refuse categorically to have the same strapless meringue that everybody wears.

I also detest seeing women dressed in black at weddings and fully intend to put a thing on my invitations telling them it’s not allowed. (I don’t really intend to be Bridezilla on the whole, but on this one point I shall be intractable.)
 

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Posted by North East Quine (# 13049) on :
 
La vie en rouge, I was a bridesmaid in September. The bride is known for her impeccable taste. The dresses were made from a 1950s Vogue pattern, and I don't think those photos will date in the way that a strapless / sleeveless dress would. The bride looked elegant and lovely.
 

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Posted by Zacchaeus (# 14454) on :
 
The other issue with the strapless sleeveless dress is that unless it is well made and well fitted it gapes at the front and reveals all.

I was at a wedding once where the ribbons came undone on the bridesmaids version and she revealed all too as it slipped down!!

The other thing I hate about them is that when anybody has a tatoo it is imopssible not to see them. One bridesmaides I saw, had a rose that clashed with the colour of the dress, and when they are on the ladies back the congregations get to see it very clearly above the dress for the whole of the service.

of course I am probably just hopelessly old fashioned about tatoos.....

[ 13. January 2014, 10:59: Message edited by: Zacchaeus ]
 

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Posted by chive (# 208) on :
 
My sister is getting married in a couple of months and has asked me to be a bridesmaid. I am quite dykey looking with a shaved head so bridesmaid's dresses may be an issue.

We've eventually agreed that I can wear a purple tail suit. Don't know what later generations will think of this.
 

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Posted by bib (# 13074) on :
 
My late mother was married in England during the 2nd World War. She had planned to wear her best dress, but was persuaded to buy a wedding dress from the top supplier in Liverpool. She left it at the shop for a few alterations and the shop was bombed a few days later. Amazingly the dress was found amongst the rubble still in its special box. My daughters still think that their grandmother's dress is lovely and much nicer than my dress from the 1970s. I think it is often necessary to skip a generation for fashion to return. Incidentally, my niece wore my mother's dress to her own wedding and looked so much like my mother in her wedding photos - a very special bonus.
 

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Posted by Moo (# 107) on :
 
My daughter who married in 2004 would gladly have worn the dress I wore in 1962. Unfortunately, it couldn't be made to fit.

It was a white cotton brocade with short sleeves and a neck that was somewhat low-cut, but not revealingly so.

Moo
 

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Posted by L'organist (# 17338) on :
 
Mine are pretty timeless because we stuck to tradition: morning dress for men, seemly dress for women with hats. Bridesmaids in pastel dresses with a waist.
 

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Posted by LeRoc (# 3216) on :
 
When I look at the wedding pictures of my parents, my father looks exactly like ... me.
 

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Posted by Jane R (# 331) on :
 
NEQ, we got married in the same year!

Mine was a Laura Ashley dress, back in the days when they did dresses for Real Women. With sleeves. Neckline low but not outrageously so. No train (I danced the Gay Gordons in it). Bridesmaids were wearing green mid-calf-length dresses, also from Laura Ashley.

The sleeves on the women's dresses look a bit odd now (why on earth did we think that puffed elbow-length sleeves were elegant?) but everything else has held up remarkably well. The person who looks most outdated in our wedding photos is the guest who came in a Posh Wedding Outfit with matching hat - electric blue cocktail dress with one of those fussy little frills about the waist and a very low neckline.
 

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Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by la vie en rouge:
... My wedding dress will be made by my mother ...

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So was mine; she had been making clothes for me off and on all my life, and because they were made for me, they fitted perfectly. She had a few conniptions along the way, bless her, but it looked lovely in the end (shiny material notwithstanding ).
 

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Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :
 
With the money I saved while I was at college (I know, I know), I bought some material to make a wedding dress and some hiking boots. In explanation, I feel I must add that I didn't actually wear them together.
 

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Posted by Badger Lady (# 13453) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by la vie en rouge:
My wedding dress is Going To Have Sleeves, dammit. Partly because I’ve made an art form out of refusing to do anything the same way everyone else does it, but also because I think strapless dresses are highly unflattering on women who don’t have very toned arms (which is most of us).

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A rose after my heart. I had sleeves and a 50's style dress (nipped in waist and a full floor length skirt).

I don't like strapless dresses and a small conservative part of my psyche felt it Wrong to have bare shoulders in a church. Also, I don't really have the, ahem, assets, to ensure the dress would stay put (which would definitely be wrong in a church!).

It actually made dress shopping alot easier as 80% of dresses were automatically ruled out.

At my parent's wedding my dad had impressive side burns and my mum a rather ill advised perm.

Looking at photos of 1990s Pakistani weddings the groom's party are wearing turbans with an large piece of material sticking up (a bit like an ice cream wafer). These seem to have gone out of fashion in the early 00s.
 

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Posted by la vie en rouge (# 10688) on :
 
I was naively optimistic that the Duchess of Cambridge's wedding dress would bring sleeves back into fashion. I'm a bit disappointed it didn't happen.
 

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Posted by Og, King of Bashan (# 9562) on :
 
The Queen of Bashan got us a big print of one of our photos for our third anniversary on Tuesday. Still too early to tell how it will age, but then both of us wore vintage and relatively timeless stuff, so I have high hopes.
 

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Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on :
 
I rather dislike strapless wedding gowns, too. They just look like white evening gowns, not proper wedding gowns. I guess you can tell I'm getting on to sixty.

I wasn't too crazy about Kate's wedding dress however. It probably looked lovely up close, in person with its fine details, but from a distance it was a bit boring.
 

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Posted by Anglo Catholic Relict (# 17213) on :
 
I am afraid the cynic in me suspects that the strapless ones are far cheaper and easier to make, and hence more profitable to the manufacturers. I have made three wedding dresses in my time (one of which was mine), and I think ten bridesmaids' dresses; all had sleeves of some kind.

I suspect the cheapness is responsible for the perpetuation of this 'fashion' for what is really an unusually long time, imo. But the idea of wearing something additional to the church is a good one, not least because of the unpredictability of the weather.
 

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Posted by Kitten (# 1179) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Anglo Catholic Relict:
I am afraid the cynic in me suspects that the strapless ones are far cheaper and easier to make, and hence more profitable to the manufacturers. I have made three wedding dresses in my time (one of which was mine), and I think ten bridesmaids' dresses; all had sleeves of some kind.

I suspect the cheapness is responsible for the perpetuation of this 'fashion' for what is really an unusually long time, imo. But the idea of wearing something additional to the church is a good one, not least because of the unpredictability of the weather.

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They may be easier to make but they're a bugger to alter
 

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Posted by Boogie (# 13538) on :
 
1979, my MIL made my dress out of broderie anglaise. It was A line, had sleeves, was size eight and gorgeous!

I kept it but not well enough, it got mildew in the damp loft of our old house

My bridesmaids wore a multi-coloured liberty print with tiny flowers, also made by MIL
 

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Posted by Graven Image (# 8755) on :
 
My Christmas week evening wedding in early 60's had a dress with long sleeves and lace trim. Looks dated today but still pretty. Hubby and Groomsmen in evening wear. Bridesmaids in long green chiffon dresses and flower girl in red-velvet. All carrying silver baskets of holly with large red bows and ribbons. Grandchildren love looking at the pictures. They are still to young to laugh and point.
 

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Posted by The Intrepid Mrs S (# 17002) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Kitten:

quote:

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Originally posted by Anglo Catholic Relict:
I am afraid the cynic in me suspects that the strapless ones are far cheaper and easier to make, and hence more profitable to the manufacturers. I have made three wedding dresses in my time (one of which was mine), and I think ten bridesmaids' dresses; all had sleeves of some kind.

I suspect the cheapness is responsible for the perpetuation of this 'fashion' for what is really an unusually long time, imo. But the idea of wearing something additional to the church is a good one, not least because of the unpredictability of the weather.

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They may be easier to make but they're a bugger to alter

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quote:

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Originally posted by The Intrepid Mrs S:


Mrs. S, never going to fit that dress again!

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quote:

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Originally posted by Sir Kevin:
I wore a light brown tux

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quote:

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he also drove us away to the reception in my full-size convertible which I still own in addition to taking the photos there.

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My (about to be) brother-in-law was a mechanic, and rustled up a couple of borrowed matching white Ford Fairlanes.

Our photographer was a teenager from our church.

When I look at the weddings in our church and in our family today, and what people pay for cars, photos, reception, music, honeymoon etc, ours appears in retrospect to have been incredibly cheap and amateurish.

Our wedding was in the morning (we tell people now that we didn't want to waste the whole day if the marriage did not work out)and followed by a morning tea catered for by the church ladies in the church hall.

Today an overseas honeymoon seems more or less obligatory, but we just went down the coast.

I was thinking of honeymoons the other day when looking at the frozen Niagara Falls on the TV news, being reminded of Oscar Wilde's comment (made during the days when Niagara was a favourite honeymoon destination, and most brides were virgins)that the Niagara Falls were the second great disappointment of many an American woman's married life.
 

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Posted by The Intrepid Mrs S (# 17002) on :
 
Master S has a history of 'interesting' hairstyles (red and/or green mohicans, black and white check, etc etc) so when he travelled to the States to attend the wedding of a very good friend from his days studying in Poland, I gave him the 'these photos are going to be around a long time, you don't want to embarrass Kim' talk, and he wore a relatively subdued style.

Turns out the marriage was over before he'd finished paying for his trip! Maybe that says as much about his money management as their commitment, however.

Mrs. S, very conventionally styled herself
 

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Posted by L'organist (# 17338) on :
 
la vie en rouge

Your proposed wedding dress sounds lovely.

Yes, the Duchess of Cambridge's dress did lead make some of us to hope that the fashion for sleeveless and/or off-the-shoulder dresses would fade but not so far. And its not just toned arms that are called for - IME there are few females of normal weight who can carry off a strapless number successfully.

Looking over family wedding photographs, the dresses worn by brides from about 1880 all look remarkably similar, the differences being ruffles around the neck or length of train. And the same pearls feature in at least 4 generations!
 

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Posted by The Intrepid Mrs S (# 17002) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Kaplan Corday:

quote:

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Originally posted by The Intrepid Mrs S:


Mrs. S, never going to fit that dress again!

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Recently the women at our church had an evening to which they took along their wedding dresses and, where still possible, modelled them.

Oddly enough, the men have never had an evening at which they could compare old wedding suits.

Funny, that.

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I bet I know what excuse they'd come up with - they were all hired! But I do remember our best man saying in his speech that he was wearing his wedding suit - from one year previously! - and could no longer do up the jacket

Mrs. S, looking out the muumuu and judicial robes again
 

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Posted by Heavenly Anarchist (# 13313) on :
 
1999. I wore an ivory Georgian-style matt satin dress with pale gold brocade bodice (made by my best friend/bridesmaid from a 19th century pattern book). My husband wore second hand black tails, and grey breeches, red brocade waistcoat and pale gold cravat all made by him from Georgian patterns. He also sported some wonderful matching sideburns. My bridesmaid had a simple long sleeveless green dress and the best man had a morning coat, red waistcoat, gold cravat, shaggy sideburns and ginger dreadlocks.
We got married at St Helen's, Bishopsgate and certainly captured everyone's attention when catching the train at Liverpool Street Station afterwards
 

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Posted by Jane R (# 331) on :
 
My Other Half wore a new grey suit that subsequently became one of his work suits. A few months after the wedding, he pulled his notebook out of his pocket to take notes at a press conference and some leftover confetti fluttered out as well...

Fortunately none of the other journos noticed, or he'd never have heard the last of it.
 

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Posted by North East Quine (# 13049) on :
 
We got married during the Great Poll Tax Clusterfuck. I had 14 days from the date of our marriage to register change of name / address, or face a large fine. No, the regulations didn't permit advance registration. So we had to call into the council offices to register en route for our honeymoon.

I was delighted to discover that someone had a) pinned a badge which played "here comes the bride" to the inside of my coat, positioned to play when I sat down and b) stuffed my pockets full of confetti. I kept leaning on the badge so that it played continually, and also kept pulling my hankie out so that the council office floor was covered in confetti.

My husband got fed up of the badge very quickly. We had our first marital tiff in that council office, surrounded by confetti, and with "here comes the bride " playing tinnily from the general area of my bottom.
 

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Posted by Jade Constable (# 17175) on :
 
My parents married in 1991 and my mum's dress was very of it's time. It and the bridesmaid dresses were made by one of my mum's aunts. Mum's was in very pale peach satin with a darker peach underskirt - it was knee-length and the underskirt was pencil-shape with the overskirt coming over it like flower petals, if that makes sense. Big shoulder pads Myself (I was two) and the other bridesmaids were in peach sailor dresses and the older bridesmaids had straw boaters - I think they realised a hat would not stay on my toddler head.

I have seen a few brides with sleeved dresses but not that many. Black bridesmaid dresses look nice though, as do grey - some of us, myself included, look dire in pastels and neutrals look so much more modern. At my best friend's wedding, the bridesmaids were in navy. We just picked our own dresses and most of them could be worn again, only the groom's sister chose a 'proper' bridesmaid dress. Bride wore this with a 'modesty panel' in the neckline, by the way. Sleeves!

I love a nice tattoo though, even better if they get blinged up in honour of the day - like here.
 

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Posted by Sherwood (# 15702) on :
 
Intrepid Mrs. S -

I read your earlier post and ended up web searching for Viyella as I didn't know what it was. I found the companies website and have now got a couple of hats, a bow tie and a hankie added to my "window shopping" folder! I think my wife may despair when she sees the tweed trilby I like.

On topic, my wife and I ended up having to get married earlier than we had planned due to bureaucratic nonsense when I first moved here, and her aunt didn't have time to make her the dress she wanted. After specifically vetoing white, she then couldn't find a dress she liked in another colour and ended up in a white one anyway. And gorgeous she looked too, even if I am biased.

[ 14. January 2014, 16:11: Message edited by: Sherwood ]
 

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Posted by Gussie (# 12271) on :
 
In 1999, I wore a gold and cream dress from Monsoon with a gold wrap. Husband wore chinos , vaguely matching jacket and plimsoles. It was all very informal, no official photos , home made programmes, food from Marks and reception in our not very big flat.
 

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Posted by Kaplan Corday (# 16119) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by North East Quine:
"here comes the bride " playing tinnily from the general area of my bottom.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Sherwood:
Intrepid Mrs. S -

I read your earlier post and ended up web searching for Viyella as I didn't know what it was.

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Viyella was WARM, though sadly not Hot - but for a late October bridesmaid in an unheated Saxon church it was just the job!

Mrs. S, preferring Viyella to Crimplene any day (something else for you to google, Sherwood!)
 

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Posted by ArachnidinElmet (# 17346) on :
 
The notable thing about my parents wedding photos is that my very white mixed European mother is wearing a red wedding sari, and my father, of Tamil ancestry, is in a very 70s 3 piece pale grey western suit sporting 'burns. I hadn't noticed until a friend mentioned it to me; it had always seemed perfectly normal.

As a bridesmaid a few years ago, I ended up wearing a beautiful deep iridescent green V-neck sleeveless dress, with my mother making a wrap in matching material from a nearby Indian shop. In the increasingly unlikely event that I get married, it would be tempting to dust off the dress and give it a second outing.
 

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Posted by georgiaboy (# 11294) on :
 
All of this prompted me to dig out my parents' wedding pix. Mother's dress was heavy white satin, high neck with a sort of ruffled collar, and long sleeves, with some sort of trim at the cuff, can't quite see it in the picture. She was only a bit over 5 ft tall, so the finish of the hem made for a rather grand train. Her sister, the only bridesmaid, wore a deep blue velvet gown which she made herself, with a bateau(?) neckline and short sleeves. Both carried enormous bouquets of roses, at least 18 inches tall, with trailing ribbons with rosebuds at the ends. These modern bridal flowers with bare stems showing just don't measure up, IMNSHO!
 

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Posted by Edith (# 16978) on :
 
I made my dress in 1973, it cost £10, the bridesmaids wore Laura Ashley dresses st 3/11 a yard also made by me. And we have no photographs because the 'friend' who promised to take them arrived late, and husband's father forgot to put any film in the camera. All we have are three or four 'snapshots' which random guests happened to take. I'm still quite cross after 40 years.
 

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Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :
 
I can remember being amazed at seeing a rather trendy relative's wedding photos - there she was in Dame Edna glasses and a wedding mini-dress! The trouble with being trendy is that your choice starts to look extremely dated almost immediately.
 

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Posted by Jade Constable (# 17175) on :
 
Shorter wedding dresses are surely quite normal?
 

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Posted by SvitlanaV2 (# 16967) on :
 
My mother got married in a mini-dress in the late 60s. Her excuse was that everyone wore mini-skirts then and you couldn't really opt out. She wouldn't be very impressed if I started wearing them, though!
 

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Posted by anoesis (# 14189) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by SvitlanaV2:
My mother got married in a mini-dress in the late 60s. Her excuse was that everyone wore mini-skirts then and you couldn't really opt out. She wouldn't be very impressed if I started wearing them, though!

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quote:

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Originally posted by anoesis:
the four who are myopic all elected to wear contacts for the day.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Kaplan Corday:

quote:

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Originally posted by anoesis:
the four who are myopic all elected to wear contacts for the day.

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What's wrong with glasses?

I don't wear them myself, but (TMI alert) find them quite sexy.

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There's nothing wrong with glasses. I find them quite sexy also, but suspect I wouldn't if I had to wear them. All I was thinking of is that the style of glasses frames do change quite markedly over the years. My parents-in-law both wear glasses and the ones my mother-in-law is wearing in her wedding photo are beyond ghastly, while my father-in-law is wearing the heavy-framed black ones that are just starting to come back into fashion, second time around...
 

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Posted by L'organist (# 17338) on :
 
I've spent the past couple of days laid-up with 'flu so thought I'd use the time constructively and go through old family photographs.

As well as the usual school, graduation and team pics there are lots of weddings. The dividing point seems to be around 1960: before that two-thirds of the grooms are in uniform, later than 1960 the military dress is less common.

My earlier thoughts about bridal wear are confirmed: dresses are full length, mainly with waist and all with at least elbow-length sleeves; some have trains; all brides have veils, nearly all wearing pearls.
 

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Posted by Jade Constable (# 17175) on :
 
That's still following fashion just as much as modern bridal wear.

Personally if I got married (which is quite a large if!), I am unlikely to wear white or any other pale colour since they don't look great on me, and would not like to wear a veil since I have nice hair that I'd want to wear loose. Brides have more choice nowadays which is a good thing. Veils are actually relatively recent - in medieval times, women wore their hair loose to signify virginity (not that signifying virginity would be important to me). Also given that it's very likely that there would be two brides at my wedding, coordinating with my bride would be important
 

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