quote:

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Originally posted by leo:
Opened a new pack of tea bags and put them all in the teapot instead of the tea caddy. Old age and a hangover to blame.

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Originally posted by Chamois:
I've now got a loaf of bread marinated in gooseberry syrup.

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Originally posted by Firenze:
Putting all the ingredients in the breadmaker except for the liquid. Then, 4 hours later, tipping a load of hot, burnt flour into a biodegradable rubbish bag. Which duly biodegraded on the way to the food bin at the other end of the hall. At this point the doorbell rang.

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quote:

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quote:Originally posted by Chamois:

quote:

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I've now got a loaf of bread marinated in gooseberry syrup.

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You say that as if it is a bad thing...

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Good point. I had the most marinated end of the loaf for breakfast this morning and actually it wasn't bad. Sort of pre-jammed.
 

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Posted by Sioni Sais (# 5713) on :
 
Mrs Sioni had prepared baked apples for pud, leaving instructions for me to put them on a low/middle shelf at gas mark-something.

It wasn't my fault she didn't tell me to take the clingfilm off the top.
 

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Posted by TheAlethiophile (# 16870) on :
 
When I was a student, renting my first house with a few friends and one random acquaintance, we had an enclosed porch, effectively needing to get through two front doors to get in or out. The outer door has a normal mechanism that you needed a key in order to both lock and unlock. The inner door, though, had a Yale lock, so it locked automatically when it was closed, but needed a key to open.

One day I went to pick up the post and the inner door shut behind me. I didn't have my keys on me, so had to wait in the porch for 2 hours before one of my housemates got back and could let me in.

 

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Posted by cattyish (# 7829) on :
 
I have done the bread without water thing. It does smell quite burnt. I have also gone out in my pyjamas with waterproofs on over the top without my house key, only to see Mr C wave at me as he left to go and get a hair cut an hour's drive away.

Cattyish, grateful for helpful neighbours.
 

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Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Ariel:
... "20p x 7 = £10."

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If only ...
 

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Posted by chive (# 208) on :
 
Last month I decided to have a treat of fried egg on toast for my lunch. I heated the grill and the frying pan then proceeded to put the bread in the frying pan and crack the egg into the grill.

I ended up grilling the egg just to make it easier to clean the grill. And it was my last egg.

This is why I rarely cook.
 

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Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :
 
I once wrapped some dinner rolls, which I intended to serve in a straw basket, in aluminum foil and put them in the oven to warm up. A few minutes later I noticed a warm, earthy aroma, sort of like newly mown hay. Checking my oven, I saw that I had put the straw basket in there along with the rolls.
 

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Posted by roybart (# 17357) on :
 
I identify strongly with a number of these posts.
The topic reminds me of Miss Prism (in The Importance of Being Earnest) who confesses in the last act of the play ...

quote:

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In a moment of mental abstraction, for which I never can forgive myself, I deposited the manuscript in the bassinette, and placed the baby in the hand-bag.

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quote:

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Originally posted by TheAlethiophile:
When I was a student, renting my first house with a few friends and one random acquaintance, we had an enclosed porch, effectively needing to get through two front doors to get in or out. The outer door has a normal mechanism that you needed a key in order to both lock and unlock. The inner door, though, had a Yale lock, so it locked automatically when it was closed, but needed a key to open.

One day I went to pick up the post and the inner door shut behind me. I didn't have my keys on me, so had to wait in the porch for 2 hours before one of my housemates got back and could let me in.

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Yep I know that one! That's why whenver I go out the front door even to the bin I put the snip (or what ever your local name is for it) on the door so that it can't catch shut
 

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Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :
 
For a time, I worked in a building which was not very secure, so each time you left your office, you had to lock the door. So, when at home, I decided to nip to the shops, the keys I put in my pocket were the ones I used most frequently....

And unfortunately the other set of house keys were bowling along an autostrada in Italy at the time.
 

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Posted by BessHiggs (# 15176) on :
 
I once rolled my 4-wheeler over on top of me into the same ditch twice in one day. Cause the first time was so much fun, you see...
 

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Posted by comet (# 10353) on :
 
something I've done a number of times. Because learning from your mistakes would be no fun at all...

I drive a very small sedan, but he has the heart of a lion. either that or his owner has the brain of a nudibranch. We get a lot of snow here. a LOT. When faced with a giant snowberm across my driveway, the smart thing to do would be to park and shovel it out. The stupid thing to do is reverse so you can get a good run at it...

So anyway, one morning I was running my son to the bus and we had not gotten out in time. If the snow had just fallen, we'd be okay (it was something like a foot, but dry and fluffy) however I turned around to see an enormous berm at the end of the drive. The plows had actually gone by much earlier than usual. Well, I didn't have time to shovel, so I pulled all the way back, revved the engine, and floored it, shooting down my 50 yard-or-so driveway. Only to slam into the berm full force and get wedged. The snow came halfway up the windows of the car and the doors would not be opening any time soon. So I practically shoved my son out of the hatchback window and made him run the mile to the bus. (he made it!)

Eventually i gave up trying to move it and climbed out of the hatchback myself to go find a shovel.

This wasn't even the LAST time I tried this. There's always the time I had to hand the enormously entertained 140lb dog to a neighbor through the sunroof...
 

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Posted by RuthW (# 13) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Firenze:
Putting all the ingredients in the breadmaker except for the liquid. Then, 4 hours later, tipping a load of hot, burnt flour into a biodegradable rubbish bag. Which duly biodegraded on the way to the food bin at the other end of the hall. At this point the doorbell rang.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Not:
(Several years ago) simmering a chicken carcass for stock all afternoon, then carefully straining the stock... down the plug hole.

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Yes, I have done this. I hate it when circumstances, spoilage or plain idiocy contrive to waste food. Especially food I've been looking forward to.

I've also set the bread maker up to have the loaf ready at the end of the day, but not clicked the pan firmly in. So nothing is mixed, resulting in a layered creation that is, on average, a loaf but in each part is inedible.
 

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Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :
 
Okay, if we're telling doofus in the snow stories--

I moved with my new husband to a large Midwestern city that shall be nameless, to take up a position as grad student/teaching fellow. Naturally my first class was at eight o'clock.
Naturally this Southern California girl had no experience with frozen locks or snow or freakin' anything.

Which was why I set off to teach my eight o'clock class wearing a long skirt and heels. In the passenger side of my husband's truck (he's from Vietnam, yes? not exactly known for snow experience either). With a freakin' huge load of lumber in the camper shell on the back of the truck.

Duh, the doors froze shut right outside of Nameless Hall. We looked at each other. We looked at the clock. What the hell was I going to do, trapped in a truck?

We looked at the back panel window. Oh no, I said. Oh yes, he said. And so I slid open the freaking panel, shucked my heels, and began slithering over the splintery lumber in the tiny space between it and the camper shell ceiling--made it to the tailgate, opened it, and promptly fell out, only to start dancing in a foot of snow, trying to keep my bare feet from freezing.

In full view of about eight students.

Meanwhile, Mr. Lamb had managed to get his door open, and came around to offer me my heels. So as far as the students were concerned, the doors were never frozen at all, and I chose that exit of my own free will.

Die, memory!
 

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Posted by Rev per Minute (# 69) on :
 
Comet - sorry, but what's a 'berm'? To me, a 'berm' is what Inspector Clouseau calls a bomb!

(I guess it's what we call a snow drift?)
 

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Posted by monkeylizard (# 952) on :
 
This is a berm made by a snow plow. Comet's may have been larger than this.
 

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Posted by Adeodatus (# 4992) on :
 
This is one of those "I'm so glad it's not just me" threads, isn't it? For those of us who, having lost our keys, need to check in the fridge, just in case. Or who sometimes need reminding that clothes come out of the washing machine cleaner if you remember to put powder/liquid in.

As some of you know, I paint. A typical painting afternoon involves me sitting at my table with all the kit everywhere. Somewhere on the table there will be a jar of water for my brushes, and also a nice cup of tea. Guess where the brushes invariably end up?
 

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Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :
 
Better than what I've done, which is to take a big swig of the paint water.
 

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Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :
 
My current favourite is: WHERE did I put that sewing needle? It can be quite some time before I notice I'm holding it between my lips or, in the recent case of a paintbrush, in my other hand).
 

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Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :
 
I once, very publicly, hugged the wrong person (condolence style, "I'm so sorry") at a funeral. And had no excuse for it, as I had been working with the man daily for three years.

It wasn't until ten years later that I discovered I was faceblind.
 

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Posted by comet (# 10353) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by monkeylizard:
This is a berm made by a snow plow. Comet's may have been larger than this.

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Thanks, Monkeylizard. about that size, actually. and very wet and clumpy. when the plows go by, these leave big old things like this blocking out driveways.

Sorry Rev, I'm never sure what translates and what doesn't.
 

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Posted by BessHiggs (# 15176) on :
 
I misplace things all the time. I'm actually famous for it (locally anyway). My best trick is to put everything I need to take with me when I leave the house in a very obvious place. Look at said things a couple of times, grab a soda out of the fridge and leave the house. I'll usually get about halfway to town before I remember all the stuff I needed. Then, about 30% of the time, I will have remembered to bring all my stuff, but won't remember that I remembered so I end up tearing the house apart, only to find whatever it was in my pocket all along.

This is why I really do need adult supervision
 

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Posted by Stercus Tauri (# 16668) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by monkeylizard:
This is a berm made by a snow plow. Comet's may have been larger than this.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Alban:
Tissues in pocket is annoying.

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