Thread: Come dine with me game Board: Oblivion / Ship of Fools.


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Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :
 
CDWM is a very naff show where losers who cannot cook inflict their culinary disasters on others, who then reciprocate. It is usually* painful.

* always.

Anyhow, I think we could do a game here on this basis. The idea is you post your evening details up, then the next person scores this out of 10, and posts their own. There are no winners or losers, just a question of how well you can do.

Post should be:

1. The theme
2. Starter
3. Main course
4. "Entertainment"
5. Dessert
6. What do the guests find in your house that is embarrassing
7. What goes terribly wrong.

So I will start:

Theme: Spicy
Starter: Roast peppers
Main: Chill sans carne
Ent: Tai Chi exercises
Dessert: Chilli chocolate ice cream
Find: That my house is a mess.
Wrong: The ice cream doesn't set.
 
Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :
 
FWIW, the Canadian version of CDWM is so bad, it's compulsive.

SC, I'm giving you 7/10. Although the ice-cream didn't quite set, its creaminess almost offset the heat of the chilli, and the Tai Chi has just sent me to ... zzzzz ... [Snore]

Theme: 1970s (dress code: flares, Afghan coats, platform boots etc.)
Starter: Prawn cocktail (obviously)
Main: Steak Diane (please specify desired doneness)
Ent: 70s disco
Dessert: Black Forest gâteau
Find: My large collection of teddy-bears
Wrong: The steak orders all get mixed up, so that the person who wanted "cremated" gets "a good vet could bring this back to life", cuts into it and faints.

[ 16. June 2014, 02:18: Message edited by: piglet ]
 
Posted by TheAlethiophile (# 16870) on :
 
Piglet, for you I would score a 7. Not keen on the sauce that accompanies prawn cocktail. I like steak, but not sure if I want Diane to be cut up into steaks.

We did a 'Come Dine With Me' at my church a few years back. Didn't go terribly well. I said could cater for 4 people as I 4 chairs in my small flat, 4 plates, 4 sets of cutlery etc. So of course I got put into a group of 6, had to buy 2 extra of everything (total cost ~£250, mostly on the chairs) and then 1 person failed to show up.

Still bitter about it. [Mad] Anyway, from what I recall:

Theme: Black tie & silly hate
Starter: Seafood bruschetta
Main: Duck a l'orange
Ent: Naff all. I was just stressed trying to get everything ready
Dessert: Nana's special pudding (crushed meringue, jellied sweet & maraschino cherry ice cream)
Find: I'd not cleared the floor in the bathroom, so there was a pair of grubby socks greeting anyone who went in.
Wrong: It was a horribly hot day and as the kitchen/living room was open plan, combined with the black tie theme, we were all very very sweaty.

[ 16. June 2014, 12:51: Message edited by: TheAlethiophile ]
 
Posted by Jane R (# 331) on :
 
TheAlethiophile, I give you 6/10. This may seem harsh as the food was excellent, but those socks... combined with the very hot weather...!

Just as well you didn't arrange any entertainment, we were all too hot (and suffering from sock fumes) to do anything.

Here's mine:

THEME: The Lord of the Rings

Starter: Bacon and mushrooms (as served by Farmer Maggot)
Main course: Rabbit stew (with herbs, but no potatoes). Piscitarian option of fried fish for any Gollums among the guests.
Dessert: Lembas and some Elven apples followed by Treebeard's special Miracle-Gro brew (guaranteed to put hairs on your chest).
Entertainment: Elrond's karaoke evening.
Embarrassing thing the guests find in my house: A *very* well-thumbed copy of The Sword of Shannara
What goes wrong: Full of fish, "Gollum" gets carried away and tries to pinch my wedding ring. In the ensuing struggle, he slips on the hearthrug and falls into the fire. Explaining what happened to the fire brigade and paramedics is very nearly as embarrassing as being outed as a Terry Brooks fan.
 
Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :
 
Jane R, I am going to score you an 8. The theme was very well thought through, and the option of fish much appreciated by one guest.

THEME: ROCKIN' IT \m/

Starter: Cocktails. Very rock and roll.
Main course: Steak. Done according to taste. Not much else.
Entertainment: Rock band on the Wii
Dessert: Cocktail ice creams
Embarrassing find: An old ABBA album.
What goes wrong: Someone breaks the TV with the Wii controller. Also two guests are so drunk that they throw up in the taxi.

ROCK IT!
 
Posted by Sir Kevin (# 3492) on :
 
Starter: Guinness
Main course: Steak. Done according to taste.
Filet mignon:.Rare
Entertainment: Rolling Stones - current tour on fb.
Dessert: Cocktail ice creams
Embarrassing find: An old Beatles album when they were on the wrong drugs.
What goes wrong: Someone crashes into my beloved Vectra Estate. Also our guests are so drunk that they throw up in the taxi.

ROCK IT!

8 0f 10.
 
Posted by Alban (# 9047) on :
 
Man, this hangover is the WORST. I'll give Kevin a 10, though, the blood level in my alcohol stream is gradually rising, so I might think better of it later. Anyway, on with the meal.

Theme? Who needs a theme? Ummm.

Starter: (Oh how fancy). Let's go with Corn fritters.

Main: What've we got here? Some old steak and some cream - eeurgh, that's off! Let's see, mushrooms, we'll call it Beef Stroganoff.

Entertainment: Nothing like a game of Monopoly for good clean fun.

Dessert: the supermarket had little individual steamed puddings on special, only just past date. I think I can pass them off as my handiwork.
I'll throw in a coffee just to try and top the others. The guy at our local roastery said this Kopi Luwak was the best of the best, and it cost enough, so I'll throw that in the plunger for the end of the evening.

Embarrassing find: Individual steam pudding packets in the bin, that ruse didn't work out very well.

What goes wrong: Someone knows what Kopi Luwak is, and gleefully calls it something vulgar in front of all the other guests.
 
Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :
 
Alban, I'll give you a 7, if only because I happen to like corn fritters and Monopoly.

Theme: A meal you can't refuse.

Cocktails: Banana daquiris, Havana style; amaretto & scotch

Table centerpiece: A severed horse's head

Salad: Antipasto a la Louie's of the Bronx

Bread: Freshly baked by Enzo the Baker

Fish course: Dead fish in bulletproof vest

Pasta course: Spaghetti and meat balls a la Clemenza

Meat course: Veal Marsala a la Louie's of the Bronx

Wine: Jugs of homemade red wine

Dessert: Cannoli; sliced oranges

Entertainment (singing): Vocals by Johnny Fontaine

Entertainment (dancing): The Tarantella

Embarrassing find: The FBI has been photographing the dinner through the windows

What goes wrong: One of the cannolis was poisoned; the guests must use "all their powers, all their skills" to place the body of the hapless guest who ate it in a car and dumped in the New Jersey marshes.
 
Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :
 
I'm sorry, Amanda, I can only give that A 5. The horse's head was eyeing me all evening, and it was 2 IN THE MORNING by the time we got back from the marshes.

WW1
Oysters on the half shell
Barbedwireque - cook over a low gas.
'Hang out your washing on the Siegfried Line' acapella.
Poppy seed cake
I heart Kaiser Bill T shirt
It wasn't all over by Christmas.
 
Posted by Pearl B4 Swine (# 11451) on :
 
"Bring your dog along"
 
Posted by Pearl B4 Swine (# 11451) on :
 
I forgot to grade Firenze: I'd give a 8.75, on style and interpretation. I am surprised that Mustard wasn't on the menu though.
 
Posted by TheAlethiophile (# 16870) on :
 
Pearl B4 Swine, you excel yourself in awfulness. As I'm not Korean, I have an aversion to eating dogs and having their crap on the floor in the eating area. You get 1 for effort.

For my next evening, I shall have as my theme: The Ship of Fools! Each person must come dressed as the avatar of a fellow shipmate.

Starter: Ecclesiantics. There's some disagreement about whether this is actually bread and wine or merely a symbolic act of eating bread & wine, with some compromising by inventing a half way house notion. But ultimately we all share in it.

Main course: Moving into Purgatory, we have the real meaty stuff here. A carnivore's delight it shall be, with a 5 bird roast with all the trimmings.

Entertainment: Lots of pun-based games in a round called The Circus.

Dessert: It has to be something Heavenly. So we begin with angel delight, where guests can top it as creatively as possible with a wide range of things like gummy bears, hundreds & thousands, chocolate sprinkles, etc.

Embarrassing find: Not unlike the mafia party that Amanda hosted, there was a Dead Horse lurking in the adjacent room.

What goes wrong: Two of the guests get involved in a flame war in Hell which rapidly spirals into ad hominems and makes everyone else lose interest entirely.

As I was doing the washing up, I found a mystery worshipper calling card in one of the dessert bowls and waiting with nervous eagerness what the verdict would be...
 
Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by TheAlethiophile:
A carnivore's delight it shall be, with a 5 bird roast with all the trimmings.
Including flame-roasted dove, I would assume?

(Miss Amanda will get her wrap.)
 
Posted by piglet (# 11803) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by TheAlethiophile:
... For my next evening, I shall have as my theme: The Ship of Fools...
For making me laugh, dear Alethiophile, you get 11/10!

[Killing me]
 
Posted by Banner Lady (# 10505) on :
 
Please dust off those trekkie outfits and meet me at Ten Forward...

1. Yes, it's a Star Trek theme (what will YOU be wearing, enquiring minds want to know?)

2. Upon arrival you will be plied with a drink. Please choose from Romulan ale, Clingon bloodwine, Traggle nectar, Draylaxian whiskey, Raktajino, or Tea. Earl Grey. Hot.

3. You will be offered an entree - this is optional. Jumbo Romulan mollusks, Palamarian sea urchin or Ferengi jellied green worm are the starters.

4. The main course is not for the faint hearted. Bergit lung with grapok sauce, rokeg blood pie, Gagh or Cardassian zabu stew are on the menu.

5. Entertainment will be watching old Star Trek episodes. The challenge will be not to spit up your food when William Shatner appears with a perm, and you see Leonard Nimmoy in a onesie.
Actually, the challenge will be not to spit up your food at all.

6. For dessert there will be Uttaberry crepes, larish pie or jimbalian fudge cake.

7. The embarrassing find will be William Shatner's toupee, that has become a sentient being in its own right and is now wandering the universe looking for a job where it will be taken seriously.

What went wrong? We were all taken over by an alien life force - fortunately it was only temporary and we were able to defeat it by changing back into our own clothes at the end of the episode. Cue eerie music....
 
Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :
 
Brilliant. A 10!

The Bankruptcy Department of a prominent law firm stages their annual banquet:

Appetizer: Louisiana Po'Boys
Soup: Broth without any bread
Main course: Choice of crow or cooked goose
Dessert: Humble pie
Entertainment: Karaoke machine programmed with "Side By Side" ("O we ain't got a barrel of money...")
Embarrassing little secret: Entire meal was catered by the local food bank.
Surprise: The court has denied your petition for bankruptcy; all guests must present their credit cards upon leaving.
 
Posted by Banner Lady (# 10505) on :
 
Miss Amanda, for such a thoroughly depressing dinner party, I'm afraid I can only score you a plummeting off the skyscraper -24 floors.

Theme: MINECRAFT
Starter: Fish
Main course: Chicken
Entertainment: Square dancing
Dessert: Cake
Embarrassing find: that the toilet in the house has been completely tiled as though built in a minecraft game.
What goes terribly wrong: finding out that some of the guests really ARE creepers, and having to evict the one that decides to channel his inner HeroBrian.

[ 01. July 2014, 19:20: Message edited by: Banner Lady ]
 
Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Banner Lady:
Miss Amanda, for such a thoroughly depressing dinner party, I'm afraid I can only score you a plummeting off the skyscraper -24 floors.
And after I gave you a 10? I'm devastated, I tell you . . . devastated! (And I forgot to add the beverage to my menu: Spilled milk.)
 
Posted by Banner Lady (# 10505) on :
 
Miss Amanda, I am sure the lawyers would be scoring you extremely highly. In fact, their annual catering contract is in the mail. No need to cry over either forgotten or spilled milk.
 


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