|
Source: (consider it)
|
Thread: Stuff
|
Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
|
Posted
I was watching a BBC program the other day on the immense growth of the storage business in the UK (especially).
One of the comments made, and not completely followed up on, was that we are a nation of hoarders, we like our stuff. But the point made was that this is out heritage, our memory - we retain our memory in stuff, not (as for Israel) in a corporate, collective, national memory.
Of course, this is partly because we are a combined nation - a good thing, but a problem in terms of racial memory.
There is a whole lot in the bible about not holding onto stuff, things, which would seem to contradict this approach. And yet Israel had their memories in their race. Memories have always been important, so is it so wrong to accumulate stuff?
And yes, this is personal. I am a hoarder. I hold onto stuff, because (for me) stuff is my memories. If you get rid of my stuff, you kill my memories.
--------------------
Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
|
Posted
On the other hand, have you looked at a modern British house lately? Not only are the rooms incredibly small, at the lower end of the market they don't have sufficient market - certainly no built-in wardrobes. Add into the mix that many are fitted with boilers that have no need to a hot water storage tank and you can cross an airing cupboard off the list as well.
Next time you look at a new development or house, look for two specific things:
1. Is there a cupboard that will house a full-size ironing board, plus laundry basket, etc?
2. Is there a cupboard that will accommodate an upright vaccuum cleaner, broom, mop and bucket?
The answer to both of these is likely to be no.
Add into the mix the absence of a coat cupboard or space for one and the need for storage becomes apparent.
And they nearly all only have one living room, so you can forget storage for books, etc as well.
--------------------
Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
| IP: Logged
|
|
Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
|
Posted
Have been dotting about North America for the past few weeks and have been noticing the vast sheds offering 'self storage' (in Canada they encouragingly add 'heated'). And yet the houses we've stayed in have been roomy - and all have basements, which UK ones rarely have.
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Desert Daughter
Shipmate
# 13635
|
Posted
A great solution to the "storing the hoard" problem can be found in Japan: Traditional houses only maintain that minimalist interior because there's often a "Kura" behind the house, a sort of store-house on the premises, where things are put that aren't in actual use in the house (also for decoration items such as hanging scrolls that can only come out in a specific season).
If ever I build a house, there will be a Kura to go with it.
--------------------
"Prayer is the rejection of concepts." (Evagrius Ponticus)
Posts: 733 | Registered: Apr 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
Nicodemia
WYSIWYG
# 4756
|
Posted
Hanging onto one's own stuff is one thing.
Going out and trawling round antique/charity/junk shops and BRINGING MORE STUFF HOME is entirely another.......... ![[Help]](graemlins/help.gif)
Posts: 4544 | From: not too far from Manchester, UK | Registered: Jul 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
|
Posted
L'organist mentions the pokiness of modern British homes but the size of modern furniture doesn't help either. A typical armchair is as wide as an old-fashioned sofa, and upstairs most double beds are 5' or 5'6" and singles are 3'. Back in the day, when houses were smaller doubles were 4'6" and singles were 2'9" if you were lucky.
Mrs Sioni and I rationalise our reluctance to dispose of anything as a consequence of a childhood that involved packing all our worldly goods into a few packing crates every three or four years. We have been in this house, our largest ever, for fifteen years and it is creaking!
--------------------
"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
|
Posted
I'm a declutterer. I try to hold lightly on to stuff. But I do have a briefcase in which I keep special memories, some from childhood.
My brother has a farm with plenty of outbuildings - and a huge, airtight container - where the whole family keep tons of stuff.
They never go and look at it, so I can't see the point tbh. If it were me I'd have a mammoth declutter and just keep a small box full of really special memories.
My Mum and Dad lived like me - but my husband's Mum didn't. She had a tidy house with a loft jam packed with useless stuff. It took two months to clear out, 80% went to charity. She really shouldn't have left it to us to do ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
--------------------
Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Firenze:
Have been dotting about North America for the past few weeks and have been noticing the vast sheds offering 'self storage' (in Canada they encouragingly add 'heated').
Whereas here in Arizona they all offer air conditioning.
--------------------
"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
| IP: Logged
|
|
Uncle Pete
Loyaute me lie
# 10422
|
Posted
Most of my memories are pictures on the wall (which haven't been added to since about 2006 (unless one is removed to make place for another). I keep pictures on the computer or on disks for all my trips. Otherwise there is very little clutter. And I have only added one piece of furniture without deleting another since 2001.
--------------------
Even more so than I was before
Posts: 20466 | From: No longer where I was | Registered: Sep 2005
| IP: Logged
|
|
Arethosemyfeet
Shipmate
# 17047
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
quote:
Originally posted by Firenze:
Have been dotting about North America for the past few weeks and have been noticing the vast sheds offering 'self storage' (in Canada they encouragingly add 'heated').
Whereas here in Arizona they all offer air conditioning.
In Scotland the key feature is "dry".
Posts: 2933 | From: Hebrides | Registered: Apr 2012
| IP: Logged
|
|
Twilight
Puddleglum's sister
# 2832
|
Posted
That's how I keep memories, too. A shoe box of photos, a special journal kept over the years, my fathers paintings on the walls and a very few knick knacks that bring special memories, like the teapot my mother and I used together when I was young and my first teddy bear.
I think the hoarders get off track when they think they have to keep everything their mother ever touched or every toy from their childhood. Not only is it not necessary, we do have memories in our brains, but if you save too many things then they all get shoved away in basements or attics and you aren't really seeing them at all.
I love the clean, free feeling of spaciousness. We three adults live quite comfortably and even beautifully, I think, without any basement, attic, cluttered closets or storage units. We have a few boxes of Christmas stuff in the garage but everything else is either on display as select décor or it's in it's place in a cupboard because it's actually used regularly.
Don't be afraid hoarders! You won't forget your prom if you don't keep that old dress.
Posts: 6817 | Registered: May 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
|
Posted
Many hoarders keep stuff "just in case" it is needed rather than because of emotional attachment. When extreme, even newspapers have to be kept "just in case" a vital article is needed one day.
--------------------
Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
Cathscats
Shipmate
# 17827
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
I think the hoarders get off track when they think they have to keep everything their mother ever touched or every toy from their childhood. Not only is it not necessary, we do have memories in our brains, but if you save too many things then they all get shoved away in basements or attics and you aren't really seeing them at all.
I agree. I used to tell the story of the home I visited as part of my duties where I sat in a small living room and talked to the family. The mother then died, and when doing a post-funeral visit about a month later I remarked that the room seemed bigger. The husband told me that what I had, without really looking at it, taken for a wall behind the sofa where I sat, was really a wall of boxes in which the wife kept ever birthday or Christmas card ever sent to any of the large family. The first thing he did was get rid of them...
That was just a story till I came to be part of clearing out my mother's house. There we discovered a cupboard groaning with notebooks - she was a writer amongst other things. These were not the lost gems of her creativity, though. These were pretty banal notes on every book she had ever read (or so it seemed). Many of them ended with the words "I won't want our read this again, so I can get rid of it." But she hadn't - the books were also all there.
One member of my family wanted to insist that every item of mother's found a "meaningful" home - this was allowed to include charity shops. My inclination would have been to get a skip and get rid of things before there was too much time to think about them and their memories. It's when you think about what to keep for too long that you forget that memories are in the mind. Or are they?
[code]
[ 26. April 2014, 21:14: Message edited by: Eutychus ]
--------------------
"...damp hands and theological doubts - the two always seem to go together..." (O. Douglas, "The Setons")
Posts: 176 | From: Central Highlands | Registered: Sep 2013
| IP: Logged
|
|
Twilight
Puddleglum's sister
# 2832
|
Posted
quote:
These were pretty banal notes on every book she had ever read (or so it seemed).
A few years ago, I was just beginning to fill a notebook like that, when I discovered that Amazon would keep all my "reviews," for me. God bless 'em.
Posts: 6817 | Registered: May 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Huia
Shipmate
# 3473
|
Posted
When our family house was sold last year I posted home or brought back some items I wasn't ready to get rid of. Since then a friend has sold some old toys for me on Trade Me (NZ's equivalent of Ebay) and some things have been disposed of through Freecycle. After the quakes I disposed of a lot of stuff because I want my life to be more simple.
I still have a long way to go to achieve this because I and trying to do it thoughtfully to avoid the kind of remorse that would lead me to increasing the clutter.
Huia
[ 27. April 2014, 00:13: Message edited by: Huia ]
--------------------
Charity gives food from the table, Justice gives a place at the table.
Posts: 10382 | From: Te Wai Pounamu | Registered: Oct 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061
|
Posted
I have found Goodreads very useful for keeping t5rack of books. They allow you to note books you want to read, to mark ones read, and to add reviews if you feel like it. I review, not necessarily for others to read, but so that I can remember what I thought about the work after reading it. Then, later on when I run across a review or something, I can go check on Goodreads and discover to my astonishment that I read the book in 2011.
--------------------
Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page
Posts: 6378 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014
| IP: Logged
|
|
Galloping Granny
Shipmate
# 13814
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
Many hoarders keep stuff "just in case" it is needed rather than because of emotional attachment. When extreme, even newspapers have to be kept "just in case" a vital article is needed one day.
My dear aunt's expression was 'It might Come In'. She had magazines on her bed tied in bundles each containing a serial, that one day she meant to give to an Old Folks' Home for the inhabitants to read. She never did, but each night she had to lift the bundles on to the floor so that she could go to bed.
We have 40 years' accumulation in the big attic and all the vast cupboards but I can't get the Grandad to get rid of anything – even the crystal carafe that's sat in the fridge with decades old water that we don't use (but after nagging he gave it to our son, who was delighted). OTOH I wanted to sell some pretty plates, several chipped, of my mother-in-law's, but son begged me not to – they've spent decades unused in a cupboard. Ever tried to sell 70 years of stamp collections? Nobody wants them.
GG
--------------------
The Kingdom of Heaven is spread upon the earth, and men do not see it. Gospel of Thomas, 113
Posts: 2629 | From: Matarangi | Registered: Jun 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
lapsed heathen
Hurler on the ditch
# 4403
|
Posted
I have a habit of keepings because 'they might come in handy' and they never do, so every so often (not often enough) we have a clear out.
Predictably enough soon after that you need the exact thing you threw out. ![[Frown]](frown.gif)
--------------------
"We are the Easter people and our song is Alleluia"
Posts: 1361 | From: Marble county | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by lapsed heathen:
I have a habit of keepings because 'they might come in handy' and they never do, so every so often (not often enough) we have a clear out.
Predictably enough soon after that you need the exact thing you threw out.
I have a cupboard that is a 'halfway house'. Stuff scheduled for 'out' stays there a while, then goes. I would rather buy another <whateveritis> than have a cluttered up house. I think this has only happened once in the last four years, I got rid of a steam cleaner I'd never used - then needed one. The new one is much better than the ancient one anyway - so that was a win too ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
--------------------
Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
|
Posted
I think I hoard stuff because it was useful once, so it might be again. I don't hoard newspapers, but I do hoard books - and IT journals at the moment, but I will probably let them go once I have finished my PhD.
I prefer the physical to the virtual, by and large.
But stuff is the repository of my memory store. The version in my hear keeps getting confused and messed up. There are all sorts of things I remember that didn't happen. If you take away the physical objects, I will be lost.
I sometimes thing that those people who want to declutter actually want to lose the past, lose their memories. Not you Huia - I know you have specific and good reasons for wanting to.
In the past, we would hold the memories in family, in heirlooms, but these are all sold on flog-it these days. I don't understand why we have no attachment to the past any more.
--------------------
Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
|
Posted
I think I now hang onto stuff for my children because, as parsonage children, my sibs and I were unable to just leave stuff in a family home.
That having been said, I have made (continue trying actually) efforts to declutter: major problem is how to keep in good nick music for several instruments all of which gets used over a 3-4 year cycle...
--------------------
Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
| IP: Logged
|
|
Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Schroedinger's cat:
In the past, we would hold the memories in family, in heirlooms, but these are all sold on flog-it these days. I don't understand why we have no attachment to the past any more.
It's not a case of *no* attachment - the form of the memories has changed. There are so many photos and videos now that physical heirlooms are not as necessary imo.
--------------------
Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
Zacchaeus
Shipmate
# 14454
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by lapsed heathen:
I have a habit of keepings because 'they might come in handy' and they never do, so every so often (not often enough) we have a clear out.
Predictably enough soon after that you need the exact thing you threw out.
Yep that used to happen to my dad all the time, which was why he never threw anything away anymore
..
When he died we cleared a garage full of 'just in cases'
Posts: 1905 | From: the back of beyond | Registered: Jan 2009
| IP: Logged
|
|
Olaf
Shipmate
# 11804
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Schroedinger's cat:
There is a whole lot in the bible about not holding onto stuff, things, which would seem to contradict this approach. And yet Israel had their memories in their race. Memories have always been important, so is it so wrong to accumulate stuff?
And yes, this is personal. I am a hoarder. I hold onto stuff, because (for me) stuff is my memories. If you get rid of my stuff, you kill my memories.
I think this is the very obstacle to be overcome: we need to detach the memories from the objects. I go through bouts of throwing away, most of them immediately preceded by watching TV shows about hoarders. Books are my worst problem, but if confronted with throwing them away because of mold, rough condition, or lack of space, I could throw them.
Thankfully, I don't feel the need to save things for anonymous other people who might need them in the future. I think this is because my family's ages were positioned such that none were in childhood during the Great Depression or wartime rationing eras.
Posts: 8953 | From: Ad Midwestem | Registered: Sep 2006
| IP: Logged
|
|
Leorning Cniht
Shipmate
# 17564
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Olaf:
I think this is the very obstacle to be overcome: we need to detach the memories from the objects.
My stuff is not memories per se, but does act as an aide-memoire - so, for example, the glass vase that used to sit on my grandmother's window ledge recalls her to me whenever I see it. The service sheet for my godson's Baptism reminds me which hymns were sung, which helps me bring the whole service into brighter memory.
But all in all I don't have an excessive volume of sentimental "stuff". On the other hand, I am guilty of "don't throw that out, it might be useful" in the first degree.
In my defense, I re-use something from my collection of might-be-usefuls fairly regularly, and it's not actually encroaching on space I would otherwise have a good use for.
ETA: Books. Umm, yes. Well. But books are small, and I do re-read most of them.
[ 28. April 2014, 03:27: Message edited by: Leorning Cniht ]
Posts: 5026 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2013
| IP: Logged
|
|
Leorning Cniht
Shipmate
# 17564
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
There are so many photos and videos now that physical heirlooms are not as necessary imo.
I love heirlooms, but genuine heirlooms aren't "stuff". Genuine heirlooms are things that you actually use on a regular basis.
So if you have a letter opener, say, that belonged to your great grandfather, and you use it to open letters every morning, that's great. If it's gathering dust on a shelf, that's not so great.
Posts: 5026 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2013
| IP: Logged
|
|
Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
|
Posted
But why is stuff such a problem? I am a person of the world, and while I am in the world, things help me to maintain my connection to the world and the history I have there.
I mean, I can't die yet, because I still have 15 books on my to-read pile. There is a sense where without my stuff, I will have no reason to carry on.
--------------------
Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
Talitha
Shipmate
# 5085
|
Posted
I don't like stuff. My heart sinks when I walk into a cluttered room, and lifts when I walk into a spacious one.
My husband is a bit of a hoarder, although not a terrible one. But he does like to keep books and magazines he's read once and won't ever re-read, and clothes that are too small or too tatty to wear. It's mainly that the clutter doesn't bother him so he'd rather live with it than spend time sorting and decluttering. I declutter what I can.
We also have a frequent pattern where we have an X that is a bit broken or substandard, so I buy a new X, hoping to throw away the old one, but it turns out the old one is better in one small way I hadn't realised, so we have to keep it as a spare.
There's also the issue of relatives buying us stuff, particularly stuff which has no practical purpose and is just for decoration. It feels rude to take it straight to the charity shop, but having it gather dust for a couple of years and then go to the charity shop isn't much better.
Then there's our daughter's Sunday school craft projects... You just can't keep them from every single week, but you can never be sure which ones she's going to become attached to.
Posts: 554 | From: Cambridge, UK | Registered: Oct 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Talitha:
We also have a frequent pattern where we have an X that is a bit broken or substandard, so I buy a new X, hoping to throw away the old one, but it turns out the old one is better in one small way I hadn't realised, so we have to keep it as a spare.
Haha! I have just done that. I bought a flymo which also vacuums the grass up, it's great. But it doesn't cut quite as short as my original flymo (which I was going to ebay) so I have kept both.
--------------------
Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Schroedinger's cat:
But why is stuff such a problem? I am a person of the world, and while I am in the world, things help me to maintain my connection to the world and the history I have there.
I mean, I can't die yet, because I still have 15 books on my to-read pile. There is a sense where without my stuff, I will have no reason to carry on.
Not at all - there are plenty of things to do which don't involve any stuff.
Getting rid of things which are unused is different from keeping stuff we use often. My brother's stored stuff is never even looked at, never mind used.
--------------------
Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
Talitha
Shipmate
# 5085
|
Posted
Also, there's not much demand for second-hand stuff any more, presumably because new stuff is getting relatively cheaper. So if you hope to get some money for your decluttering you often can't (we just failed to sell a fairly recent multifunction wifi printer), and even if you're happy to give it away for free it can be hard to find a taker (local furniture charity shop said they're fully booked for collections and it'll be over a month before they can pick up our spare bed that we no longer have room for).
Posts: 554 | From: Cambridge, UK | Registered: Oct 2003
| IP: Logged
|
|
Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
|
Posted
I think some of us have memories that grow dim without triggers to act as reminders, and I'm one of them ![[Waterworks]](graemlins/bawling.gif) . I discovered this when I came across an ancient service sheet etc. and all sorts of things came back that never would have if I had simply sat down to remember that occasion.
--------------------
Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
| IP: Logged
|
|
Pomona
Shipmate
# 17175
|
Posted
It's important to distinguish here between those who just have too much stuff, and those for whom hoarding is an expression of mental illness.
A lot of the hoarders I know who are either mentally ill or borderline grew up during rationing or otherwise very hard times.
--------------------
Consider the work of God: Who is able to straighten what he has bent? [Ecclesiastes 7:13]
Posts: 5319 | From: UK | Registered: Jun 2012
| IP: Logged
|
|
Belle Ringer
Shipmate
# 13379
|
Posted
I have too much stuff. For all the reasons ranging from laziness (decisions are work) to "memories" to "I might want to do that hobby again some day" to "it just needs to be fixed and it will be good again" to "what if I want it again and it's out-of-print (no longer made)" - and so on.
A small church I visit 3 times a year (special events) has newly taken to silent auctions of donated goods to raise funds for youth programs or whatever. I said call me ahead of time next time, I have a house to clean out. Did manage to slip half a dozen things from the "regifting" pile into the second day of their current silent auction, most had bids by the time I left. A tiny start.
Posts: 5830 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2008
| IP: Logged
|
|
Panda
Shipmate
# 2951
|
Posted
There's always the option of taking photos of things instead of actually keeping the things. I've got all the pictures of everything that might be sentimental that I sold on Ebay - mostly children's clothes. although some very special ones I've kept to make into a patchwork quilt one day (really, I will, I promise).
It's pretty good, but I admit I regret one little pair of shoes... if I hadn't actually received the money for them I think I'd have kept them. But I took a pic of them in my hand, and I can just about feel them, IYKWIM.
Posts: 1637 | From: North Wales | Registered: Jun 2002
| IP: Logged
|
|
Photo Geek
Shipmate
# 9757
|
Posted
My biggest problem is finding someone to help me haul things away. Even just taking a load of stuff to Goodwill is hard as I get older.
--------------------
"Liberal Christian" is not an oxymoron.
Posts: 242 | From: Southern Ohio, US | Registered: Jul 2005
| IP: Logged
|
|
Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061
|
Posted
Do they do Freecycle where you are? You could probably google to find out. Freecycle is like recycle, only free -- it is a site to post things that you would like to give away, so that they don't go into the landfill. As such it is intensely local, focused on neighborhoods or towns.
But I have gotten rid of oh so many useful things on Freecycle -- half-sheets of plywood, three-quarters of a can of blackboard paint, cat beds rejected by resident felines, clothing outgrown or rejected by offspring. Once someone says they want it, you tell them your address and pop it out on the front step in a plastic bag for pickup.
--------------------
Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page
Posts: 6378 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014
| IP: Logged
|
|
CuppaT
Shipmate
# 10523
|
Posted
I love Freecycling, and have given people everything from a working trash compactor to baby finches. I've gotten a few good things myself, too!
I am NOT a hoarder. I think the thing that cured my sisters and me was when my older sister was helping my mom prepare to move out of the house we'd all lived in forever. Cleaning out a cabinet, she held up a set of teeth! My mom said we had to keep those, not throw them out, as they were her mother's, and you never know when they might come in handy! (Grandma had been dead 15 years.)
--------------------
Stand at the brink of the abyss of despair, and when you see that you cannot bear it any longer, draw back a little and have a cup of tea.
~Elder Sophrony
Posts: 919 | From: the edge of the Ozarks | Registered: Oct 2005
| IP: Logged
|
|
Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by CuppaT:
I am NOT a hoarder. I think the thing that cured my sisters and me was when my older sister was helping my mom prepare to move out of the house we'd all lived in forever. Cleaning out a cabinet, she held up a set of teeth! My mom said we had to keep those, not throw them out, as they were her mother's, and you never know when they might come in handy! (Grandma had been dead 15 years.)
But if she's gone to where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth, she might need them. (Though I am sure that, being your grandmother, she's in a better place than that.)
--------------------
"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
| IP: Logged
|
|
Nenya
Shipmate
# 16427
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by CuppaT:
I am NOT a hoarder. I think the thing that cured my sisters and me was when my older sister was helping my mom prepare to move out of the house we'd all lived in forever. Cleaning out a cabinet, she held up a set of teeth! My mom said we had to keep those, not throw them out, as they were her mother's, and you never know when they might come in handy! (Grandma had been dead 15 years.)
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif) Reminds me of the time my mum, an ardent declutterer, threw away my dad's spare dentures. The difference being that my dad was still alive (though not actually wearing them) at the time.
I'm a hoarder and completely understand the attachment to things as memories - in my case it's particularly papers and books. I'm trying hard to clear years' worth of children's school timetables, notes, letters... When I hold these things in my hands it's as though I'm given a bit of their, or my, lives back. A while ago I decluttered a drawer full of their early school work. It represented hours of their young lives practising the formation of letters and numbers. I still feel sad that I haven't got those things any more. We sorted out my mum's house after she died and decluttered the books. I kept a boxful but there are others which held memories - and, yes, of course I still have those memories - which had to go. I cried long and hard over it and it still makes me sad.
I'm having to accept that's the kind of person I am and I really do have to let some things go and live with the sense of loss. Our fairly sizeable house is straining at the seams with boxfuls of old papers I don't need. Decluttering it is hard work. But the flip side is that I long for space and a decluttered house and I don't want to leave it all for the children to sort out when I have shuffled off this mortal coil.
One thing I really am good at, though, is decluttering clothes. Mr Nen and I recently shifted bedrooms in order to decorate ours and everything of mine that came out of my double wardrobe (which contains both summer and winter clothes) went back in again because I use it.
The stuff in his triple wardrobe, however, was another matter. ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
Nen - glad to be busy today and have an excuse to take a break from the decluttering.
--------------------
They told me I was delusional. I nearly fell off my unicorn.
Posts: 1289 | Registered: May 2011
| IP: Logged
|
|
L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
|
Posted
I've a tendency to hoard: coming low in the order of a load of siblings I had very few things absolutely new, as opposed to new-to-me, growing up so maybe that accounts for it.
Added to which our mama kept all the 'important' bits of paper: school reports, examination certificates, music exams, etc, etc, etc. Nothing was ever handed over until you either reached 18 or left home. Older sibs got to 18, got their stuff: come my 18th mama had gone but went to look for my papers - NOTHING. All there for younger sibs, few remaining bits for olders, just nothing of mine.
Consequently I make damn sure I've all my children's certificates, etc, in apple-pie order...
--------------------
Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
| IP: Logged
|
|
ecumaniac
Ship's whipping girl
# 376
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by L'organist:
On the other hand, have you looked at a modern British house lately?
5 years of living here (and 4 house moves in that time) have utterly cured me of any hoarding tendency. Keeping "stuff" for memories is a luxury as I just couldn't afford housing that spacious.
I'm looking at yet another house move in August this year, so starting my divestment of extraneous stuff now, beginning with eating all the stores in my food cupboard.
[ 01. May 2014, 20:56: Message edited by: ecumaniac ]
--------------------
it's a secret club for people with a knitting addiction, hiding under the cloak of BDSM - Catrine
Posts: 2901 | From: Cambridge | Registered: Jun 2001
| IP: Logged
|
|
|
Printer-friendly view
