Ship of Fools: "A lawyer in California is pushing a ballot measure to legalize killing gay people"

Thread: "A lawyer in California is pushing a ballot measure to legalize killing gay people" Board: Oblivion / Ship of Fools.

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Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :

WTH????? (From Vox.)

Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on :

Democracy in action.

Someone could always start a new ballot measure advocating the killing of anyone who voted for the first ballot measure. Eventually, the whole thing could descend into the Hatfields and the McCoys, but with better clothes.

[ 23. March 2015, 10:03: Message edited by: orfeo ]

Posted by Twilight (# 2832) on :

There's a nut case in California.

Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :

orfeo--

Just FYI: the Hatfields and the McCoys made peace, some years back.

Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :

Twilight--

Don't be jealous--I'm sure there are some nuts where *you* are, too.
[Biased]

Posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider (# 76) on :

If you're a literalist it makes perfect logical sense. God's going to burn them in hell for all eternity in conscious torment, so obviously killing them is barely significant, and anyway he said to do it in Leviticus, and what's more if they lead others down the path of approving their wicked lifestyle the same will happen to them. So best kill 'em now.

It's exactly the logic the OT uses to justify killing people for worshipping other Gods.

[ 23. March 2015, 10:53: Message edited by: Karl: Liberal Backslider ]

Posted by Sioni Sais (# 5713) on :

If one is into literalism, doesn't that make working as a lawyer pretty dubious?

Posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider (# 76) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Sioni Sais:
If one is into literalism, doesn't that make working as a lawyer pretty dubious?

One is reminded of the story told of God walking around Heaven where it shares a fence with Hell (turns out they're side by side rather than above and below). God notices that there's a dirty great hole in the fence, spots a demon on the other side and tells him to call his boss, pronto. So the demon runs off and returns with Satan himself. God insists on having it fixed. Satan does a French-Knight-Taunting-Arthur as in Holy Grail. God stomps off in high dudgeon.

"Where're you going?" asks the Devil
"Getting myself a lawyer!" God snaps back

Devil starts laughing "Where are you going to find a lawyer?!"

Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Golden Key:
orfeo--

Just FYI: the Hatfields and the McCoys made peace, some years back.

As a response, this makes about as much sense as telling someone they can't make a reference to Hitler because he's dead.

Posted by Sioni Sais (# 5713) on :

quote:
Originally posted by orfeo:

quote:
Originally posted by Golden Key:
orfeo--

Just FYI: the Hatfields and the McCoys made peace, some years back.
As a response, this makes about as much sense as telling someone they can't make a reference to Hitler because he's dead.

If that lawyer was to propose the death penalty for an inability or unwillingness to recognise allusion, simile or metaphor he might just be onto something.

Posted by jbohn (# 8753) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
There's a nut case in California.

Film at 11. [Biased]

Posted by Prester John (# 5502) on :

quote:
Originally posted by jbohn:

quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
There's a nut case in California.
Film at 11.

<cough>Jesse "contrails are a government conspiracy" Ventura</coug>

Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on :

At first I thought it was a "Modest Proposal" gag until I realized that he was from Orange County.

I wonder what Westboro will say?

Personally, I think he should go volunteer his services to Isis as their official execute-the-western-dog-fags point man. Then when they realize he is a Christian, they'll hand him over to their execute-the-western-dog-Christians point man and that will be that.

I think Jonathan Swift might have agreed.

Posted by lilBuddha (# 14333) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Lyda*Rose:
At first I thought it was a "Modest Proposal" gag until I realized that he was from Orange County.

That thought crossed my mind as well, but the article mentions he also attempted to have the King James Bible added to the curriculum for it "rich use" of English.

Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :

Ohfergoshsakes.

I'm from Orange County (well, it was just over the backyard fence, does that count?)

Everybody's got their flakes and nuts. I don't particularly want this one. Can we agree he's from Jerklandia or something?

Posted by IngoB (# 8700) on :

I guess as an emergency counter-measure one could propose the "kill all lawyers" act...

Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on :

HEY!

Posted by romanlion (# 10325) on :

Lawyers are people too....allegedly.

Posted by saysay (# 6645) on :

Latin is a dead language buried in the dust
First it killed the Romans and now it's killing us

Semper Ubi Sub Ubi

Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on :

[Confused]

What's Latin got to do with anything?

Posted by Doc Tor (# 9748) on :

quote:
Originally posted by saysay:
Semper Ubi Sub Ubi

Latin phrases (even charmingly pointless puns) like all quotations not in English, require a translation beneath...

DT
HH

Posted by saysay (# 6645) on :

Sorry, forgot.

Semper Ubi Sub Ubi

Always Where Under Where

In the US, a lot of legal paperwork is either written in Latin or contains a lot of Latin. The fact that a lot of people don't know any Latin and don't understand what they're signing is part of how the powers that be keep the people down.

Posted by Dave W. (# 8765) on :

quote:
Originally posted by IngoB:
I guess as an emergency counter-measure one could propose the "kill all lawyers" act...

Someone has already proposed the Intolerant Jackass Act...

quote:
Originally posted by saysay:
In the US, a lot of legal paperwork is either written in Latin or contains a lot of Latin.

I would be very interested in seeing US legal paperwork written in Latin! Can you direct me to some examples?

Posted by jbohn (# 8753) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Prester John:

quote:
Originally posted by jbohn:

quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
There's a nut case in California.
Film at 11.
<cough>Jesse "contrails are a government conspiracy" Ventura</coug>

Point for Prester John. [Big Grin]

Posted by Stercus Tauri (# 16668) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Golden Key:
WTH????? (From Vox.)

There's a list of neologisms circulating around the internet, my favourite being: "Ignoranus: one who is not only ignorant, but also an arsehole". I hadn't expected to find it so useful so soon.

Posted by saysay (# 6645) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Dave W.:

quote:
Originally posted by saysay:
In the US, a lot of legal paperwork is either written in Latin or contains a lot of Latin.
I would be very interested in seeing US legal paperwork written in Latin! Can you direct me to some examples?

Sadly, no. I signed a non-disclosure agreement as a condition of employment (and the food and housing that that employment sometimes brings).

Posted by Dave W. (# 8765) on :

There's a lot of US legal paperwork written in Latin, and it's all covered by your employer's non-disclosure agreement?

Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on :

It's a BIG law firm.

Posted by RooK (# 1852) on :

I can back up saysay's claim that there's a lot of US legal paperwork written in Latin - except for the part about there being a lot of it, or necessarily US legal documents, or in Latin. But other than those minor quibbles, I'm sure it's completely correct, and that there's an important and unquestionable reason why it would be entirely guarded by an NDA.

Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :

quote:
Originally posted by saysay:

In the US, a lot of legal paperwork is either written in Latin or contains a lot of Latin. The fact that a lot of people don't know any Latin and don't understand what they're signing is part of how the powers that be keep the people down.

Worked for The Church for centuries.

My own illimitable power is doubtless down to possessing 'O' Level Latin (tremble, peasants).

Posted by Pyx_e (# 57) on :

It must be spring or something

He was on TV last night, ranting. The BBC seemed to delight in his madness. It was a bit funny when he railed against his "Hindu Judge" for fining him but then accepted the fine rather than go to goal for 45 days.

The Bible says it, so it must be true. QED.

Posted by Dave W. (# 8765) on :

quote:
Originally posted by orfeo:
It's a BIG law firm.

She works for Opus Dei, Attorneys at Law, and she can't talk about it because ... deadly albino monks?

Posted by Golden Key (# 1468) on :

Oh, but Silas wasn't just a deadly albino monk. He wanted very much to be good, but he was too broken and manipulated.

(Presuming you're referencing DVC.)

Posted by Ariston (# 10894) on :

Huh. I used to work in a business—academic publishing—whose purpose was basically hoodwinking smart people into giving us something for far less than it was worth. There were several other people in my office who were proficient in Latin (as well as French, German, Spanish, Italian, Hebrew, Greek, Syriac, and Esperanto). Heck, we probably could have run our standard contract over to the School of Canon Law and/or Department of Greek and Latin and worked with them to get the whole thing translated into Latin. Medieval Latin. In the style used by the Papal chancery in the late 14th century when writing to the Holy Roman Empire as used by the anonymous scribe who used a Tyrolian script and had a statistically significant preference for using the velox cursus relative to his contemporaries, though not to Tyrolian scribes in the Papal chancery a generation later.

Maybe it's just because I'm used to seeing contracts and don't notice all the Latin, but I don't remember there being any Latin in ours, or the contracts we signed when we licensed titles from other publishers. Granted, a fair number of our authors were probably more fluent in Latin than English, so we might have been using a language not understanded by the people to sow confusion, but it seems unlikely.

Oh hey, I just remembered—I have an employment contract right here with a company that has a marked tendency to not pay me on time. Sounds like they might be a great candidate for "likely to play linguistic tricks to keep you from noticing what's happening so they can cheat you."

Alright, back. Eight pages of fine print. Unless you count "indemnify," and/or the abbreviations "BA" and "BS," not a single word in Latin.

[ 24. March 2015, 15:44: Message edited by: Ariston ]

Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :

Any nation with E pluribus unum on its Great Seal is clearly up to no good.

And the Vatican runs the US legal system? I thought it was the Illuminati*?

*Latin again. See?

Posted by Honest Ron Bacardi (# 38) on :

Did the Illuminati win? Shame - my money was on the reptilians. That's £5 down the drain then. Should have made it an each-way bet.

Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :

Just WHO was offering the odds and taking your money? That's the person/thing/spectral emanation I would be worried about.

Posted by Eliab (# 9153) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
Devil starts laughing "Where are you going to find a lawyer?!"

Our most worthy patron:

Sanctus Ivo erat Brito,
Advocatus et non latro.
Res miranda populo.

(St Ivo was a Breton, an advocate, and not a thief. An astonishing thing to the people.)

Posted by Teufelchen (# 10158) on :

quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
I can back up saysay's claim that there's a lot of US legal paperwork written in Latin - except for the part about there being a lot of it, or necessarily US legal documents, or in Latin. But other than those minor quibbles, I'm sure it's completely correct, and that there's an important and unquestionable reason why it would be entirely guarded by an NDA.

Posted by LeRoc (# 3216) on :

quote:
RooK: I can back up saysay's claim that there's a lot of US legal paperwork written in Latin - except for the part about there being a lot of it, or necessarily US legal documents, or in Latin.

But it *is* paper.

Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on :

To be vaguely fair to saysay, lawyers do have some history of using Latin (and apparently it's crappy Latin at that) to talk about various legal concepts.

Thankfully, the trait has largely been bred out at this point. Although I did have a situation a few years ago where I was copying from a not-that-old law that had "prima facie" in it. Someone wanted to know why I changed it. I said because I'm writing in English.

Posted by Gee D (# 13815) on :

How do you deal with subpoena? Hint - as 1 word, it's now English; 2 is the Latin origin. I would have thought that prima facie was now English, as even journalists use it from time to time. What about mandamus and certiorari (that continues to use the old pronunciation, not the new "kerteeyorerajri").

Posted by orfeo (# 13878) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Gee D:
How do you deal with subpoena? Hint - as 1 word, it's now English; 2 is the Latin origin. I would have thought that prima facie was now English, as even journalists use it from time to time. What about mandamus and certiorari (that continues to use the old pronunciation, not the new "kerteeyorerajri").

Yes, subpoena is now English. Hint - it's not written in italics. It's a pretty good sign that something hasn't become part of the English language if it's still written in italics. Prima facie is borderline but I'm pretty sure it was prima facie when I came across it.

I've never had to write about mandamus or certiorari. I suspect we're stuck with them, especially mandamus because it's mentioned in the constitution.

Posted by John Holding (# 158) on :

I think habeus corpus is still normally italicized.

John

Posted by M. (# 3291) on :

Habeas corpus, not habeus.

M.

Posted by jacobsen (# 14998) on :

What's Latin for picky?

Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :

quote:
Originally posted by jacobsen:
What's Latin for picky?

Dolor in clunibus?

Which, as we all know, means 'pain in the buttock'. I tried Google translate on the more colloquial Pain in the arse, which it rendered 'dolor in asinum' - or pain in the donkey. Which in turn reminds me of the young lady of Madras who had a most beautiful ass. It was not, as you'd think, firm, round and pink, but grey, long-haired and eats grass.

Posted by Doc Tor (# 9748) on :

Point of order: wouldn't the young lady in question most likely have a brown bottom, if she were indigenous to the Indian sub-continent?

Posted by Dave W. (# 8765) on :

quote:
Originally posted by John Holding:
I think habeus corpus is still normally italicized.

John

In this 2008 US Supreme Court decision it appears without italics, as does certiorari. Other incidental bits of Latin are italicized, though - e.g., id., inter alia - as are titles of other cases.

Posted by quetzalcoatl (# 16740) on :

On the subject of brown/pink bottoms, I think that empirical research is required at this point; and I am willing to undertake it, and hopefully a certain amount of sponsorship will be forthcoming from interested parties.

[ 25. March 2015, 09:58: Message edited by: quetzalcoatl ]

Posted by Adeodatus (# 4992) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Firenze:

quote:
Originally posted by jacobsen:
What's Latin for picky?
Dolor in clunibus?

Which, as we all know, means 'pain in the buttock'. I tried Google translate on the more colloquial Pain in the arse, which it rendered 'dolor in asinum' - or pain in the donkey. Which in turn reminds me of the young lady of Madras who had a most beautiful ass. It was not, as you'd think, firm, round and pink, but grey, long-haired and eats grass.

It depends whether the pain in the arse is in the buttocks or in the ... er ... outlet. The latter, I think, would be 'dolor in ano', if I remember my declensions right. English has to resort to 'arsehole' to distinguish between the options. Oddly, of course, in English slang, the arsehole is the person themselves, not the location of the pain they're causing.

Posted by Firenze (# 619) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Doc Tor:
Point of order: wouldn't the young lady in question most likely have a brown bottom, if she were indigenous to the Indian sub-continent?

She could have been a memsahib.

Posted by Doc Tor (# 9748) on :

But surely the limerick would have mentioned this important fact? I demand accuracy in my doggerel!

Posted by Helen-Eva (# 15025) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Doc Tor:
But surely the limerick would have mentioned this important fact? I demand accuracy in my doggerel!

Two suggestions to improve accuracy.

1. There was a memsahib of Madras, who had a most beautiful ass. It was not as you'd think, firm round and pink but grey and long-haired and eats grass.

Or alternatively:

2. There once was a girl from Madras, who had a most beautiful ass. It was great of renown, though not round or brown, but grey and long-haired and eats grass.

*tries to think of something more useful to do*

Posted by Callan (# 525) on :

I've always wanted to learn Latin.

But you know how it is. Quondam thing after another.

Discreetly slips out, collecting coat on the way

Posted by Ariston (# 10894) on :

What the heck have they put in the water that makes everyone commit thread necromancy?

Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on :

Cos we wuv you. [Axe murder]

Posted by Teilhard (# 16342) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Helen-Eva:

quote:
Originally posted by Doc Tor:
But surely the limerick would have mentioned this important fact? I demand accuracy in my doggerel!
Two suggestions to improve accuracy.

1. There was a memsahib of Madras, who had a most beautiful ass. It was not as you'd think, firm round and pink but grey and long-haired and eats grass.

Or alternatively:

2. There once was a girl from Madras, who had a most beautiful ass. It was great of renown, though not round or brown, but grey and long-haired and eats grass.

*tries to think of something more useful to do*

Still and all, either way an ass poops,
requiring a toilet or scoops;
matters not what she eats -- grass or sweet treats --
her gastro-colic reflex makes "ooops" …

Sorry, mates … [Hot and Hormonal]

Posted by Ariston (# 10894) on :

No.

There's an analogous case to Godwin's Law—once a thread devolves into toilet humor, any chance of meaningful discussion is over. Or, given that this thread died and sank blissfully, was already over.

Fuck that.

THREAD CLOSED

—Ariston, Hellhost

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