Ship of Fools: OK God ..... why?

Thread: OK God ..... why? Board: Oblivion / Ship of Fools.

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Posted by Boogie (# 13538) on :

Why is sugar so pleasurable and yet and so bad for us humans in any decent quantity?

Answers on a postcard.

What are your lighthearted ‘why’ questions for God?

Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :

Isn't it St. Augustine who said that all sins are fun except envy? So why isn't envy fun too?

Posted by Brenda Clough (# 18061) on :

At least sugar I know the answer to. Until very very recently, sugar and all sweet foods were surpassingly rare. You got them if you ate perfectly ripe fruit, the one month of the year the fruit was ready, or you lucked onto a honeybee hive or something. We evolved to like sugar (it's better for you to eat ripe fruit than green or rotten), but never to have sugar by the carload for no effort, as when we drink sodas or eat cupcakes. And so our systems are flummoxed, when suddenly we overload them with sugary cereals and breakfast muffins that have more sugar than most cavemen ate in a week.

Posted by Boogie (# 13538) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
At least sugar I know the answer to. Until very very recently, sugar and all sweet foods were surpassingly rare. You got them if you ate perfectly ripe fruit, the one month of the year the fruit was ready, or you lucked onto a honeybee hive or something. We evolved to like sugar (it's better for you to eat ripe fruit than green or rotten), but never to have sugar by the carload for no effort, as when we drink sodas or eat cupcakes. And so our systems are flummoxed, when suddenly we overload them with sugary cereals and breakfast muffins that have more sugar than most cavemen ate in a week.

I’m not looking for excuses [Biased]

Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :

Why is it that I can do amazing things sometimes, but still cannot get out of bed most days?

Can't I just be normal?

Posted by Sipech (# 16870) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
What are your lighthearted ‘why’ questions for God?

Why is is that when I'm looking for a hankie, I can never find one, but 2 minutes after an explosive sneeze, I can suddenly find 3?

Why is it that whenever I come to pull the blinds, whether up or down, the first one I pull always takes it in the wrong direction?

Posted by Hedgehog (# 14125) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Sipech:
Why is it that whenever I come to pull the blinds, whether up or down, the first one I pull always takes it in the wrong direction?

This one is just the operation of the immutable law of statistics: in any 50-50 chance, you are bound to get it wrong.

Posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe (# 5521) on :

Why, if the traffic light is a "delayed green," is it always my side of the road that is delayed while the other side sallies through the intersection with impunity?

Posted by Boogie (# 13538) on :

🎵🎶. We plough the fields and scatter
the good seed on the land,
but it is fed and watered
by God's almighty hand:
you send the snow in winter,
the warmth to swell the grain,
the breezes and the sunshine,
and soft refreshing rain. 🎶🎵

Yes, but why not send just the right amount of ‘soft refreshing rain’ on each field and garden - and send it at night? Simples.

Posted by Stercus Tauri (# 16668) on :

Well, God, did you start going bald at the age of thirty?

Posted by Anglican_Brat (# 12349) on :

Dear God, why doesn't coffee make me lose weight?

Posted by Adeodatus (# 4992) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Anglican_Brat:
Dear God, why doesn't coffee make me lose weight?

Dear God, why doesn't anything make me lose weight?

And why is there never anything to watch on 200 channels of tv?

Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :

Why does it always take me three goes to get a USB connectin in?

Posted by Moo (# 107) on :

Dear God, why did you create poison ivy?

Moo

Posted by no prophet's flag is set so... (# 15560) on :

Dear God, what would chairs look like if our knees bent the other way?

Posted by Hedgehog (# 14125) on :

Dear God,

Why has it never occurred to you to schedule mornings for later in the day?

Sincerely,

Your Friend,
Hedgie

Posted by Pigwidgeon (# 10192) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Hedgehog:
Dear God,

Why has it never occurred to you to schedule mornings for later in the day?

Sincerely,

Your Friend,
Hedgie

Or at least schedule sunrises later in the morning, when people can enjoy them?

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
Or at least schedule sunrises later in the morning, when people can enjoy them?

Er ... isn't that called "winter"?

Posted by Uncle Pete (# 10422) on :

Dear God: Did you ever think of starting us out old and becoming progressively younger?

[Tear]

Posted by Sipech (# 16870) on :

Why, when eating out, is the price of the meal inversely proportional to the size of the portions?

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

But directly related to the detail with which the individual ingredients of each dish are described? (At least we don't seem - yet - to have started describing the physical dishes themselves, "loving crafted out of the finest porcelain, painstakingly decorated by artists who have served the company for an average of 30 years, carefully fired in traditional bottle kilns fuelled by hand-hewn Welsh coal and delivered to our restaurant by a vintage carriage drawn by a pedigree Suffolk Punch").

Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan:

quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
Or at least schedule sunrises later in the morning, when people can enjoy them?
Er ... isn't that called "winter"?

God, why Winter? Can't we all have long days all year around?

Posted by balaam (# 4543) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Why, if the traffic light is a "delayed green," is it always my side of the road that is delayed while the other side sallies through the intersection with impunity?

And exactly the same when you are returning, which I have always found odd.

The TrueReason™ is that traffic lights are in league with Cthulhu, that is the only way they could be so soul destroying.

Posted by Piglet (# 11803) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Adeodatus:
... why is there never anything to watch on 200 channels of tv?

You've got the BBC and Dave - stop complaining! [Devil]

Dear God, why does breakfast, which could be so enjoyable, have to happen in the morning?

Posted by Ian Climacus (# 944) on :

Work meetings. Why?

Work appraisals? Even more why? Did Jesus do 360 reviews with the Disciples?

[ 11. October 2017, 09:54: Message edited by: Ian Climacus ]

Posted by Kittyville (# 16106) on :

And if I may add to that, Ian:

Dear God, why staff surveys? And why repeated gee ups to complete "voluntary" staff surveys in order to hit regional targets?

Posted by Huia (# 3473) on :

So why does my cat throw up a fur ball before she goes outside? (sigh).

Huia

Posted by Hedgehog (# 14125) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Huia:
So why does my cat throw up a fur ball before she goes outside? (sigh).

A reputable news source has reported it is because a carpet's hairball-locking microfibers are ideal, plus it is cushy on your paws.

Posted by jedijudy (# 333) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Hedgehog:

quote:
Originally posted by Huia:
So why does my cat throw up a fur ball before she goes outside? (sigh).
A reputable news source has reported it is because a carpet's hairball-locking microfibers are ideal, plus it is cushy on your paws.

So true!

Posted by Huia (# 3473) on :

Hedgehog - Thank you, that is the work of a genius - why hasn't she been awarded some prestigious award?

Huia

Posted by Graven Image (# 8755) on :

Dear God why when I love to sing can I not carry a tune. I am so bad I was once kicked out of the junior choir. Nobody gets kicked out of junior choir.

Posted by churchgeek (# 5557) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Why, if the traffic light is a "delayed green," is it always my side of the road that is delayed while the other side sallies through the intersection with impunity?

The other day I was stopped at an intersection with a street* that had a wide median, so there were two separate lights, and room for one, maybe two cars sitting at the second light (i.e., in the part of the intersection where the median was in the other street). My light turned green just in time for me to get to the median as that light turned red. I sat through two different red lights at one intersection!

Obviously, it was timed for traffic headed the opposite way I was going. There must be some good reason the lights for the east-west traffic can't all change at the same time, but it probably can't be explained on a postcard.

*A service drive to a freeway, actually, with traffic merging, so the median is created by that merge. IOW, both lanes going the same direction!

Posted by Og, King of Bashan (# 9562) on :

Traffic signal / hankie hybrid paradox:

Why is it that when I'm driving and need a red so that I can blow my nose, I hit every green light in town, but when I'm desperate to get to a bathroom, I hit every red light in town?

Posted by Baptist Trainfan (# 15128) on :

It's the same if you want to stop and look at your map or look for a street name on a wall (I don't do SatNav).

Posted by Og, King of Bashan (# 9562) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan:
It's the same if you want to stop and look at your map or look for a street name on a wall (I don't do SatNav).

Or if your kid drops her teddy and is loudly demanding that you pick it up for her off of the floor of the car.

Posted by churchgeek (# 5557) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Og, King of Bashan:
Traffic signal / hankie hybrid paradox:

Why is it that when I'm driving and need a red so that I can blow my nose, I hit every green light in town, but when I'm desperate to get to a bathroom, I hit every red light in town?

My car has a little nook in the dashboard to the left of the steering wheel that is so random...I'm not sure what it's for. (Keep in mind, this is an American car, so the driver's on the left side.) But it perfectly fits one of those little tissue packs, and I have a trash container in the door not far below it. Between my regular allergies and a couple recent colds, I've gotten pretty good at blowing my nose one-handed while driving! (Not in any tricky traffic, of course.)

Posted by Sandemaniac (# 12829) on :

OK, God, why... does this bloody cold keep coming back? I can go between feeling absolutely fine to hawking stuff up you could camouflage tanks with in the space of a couple of hours. I have stuff to do that I can't feeling like shite!

AG

Posted by Patdys (# 9397) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Ian Climacus:
Work meetings. Why?

Work appraisals? Even more why? Did Jesus do 360 reviews with the Disciples?

I understand Judas was particularly uncomplimentary.

Posted by Bene Gesserit (# 14718) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Kittyville:
And if I may add to that, Ian:

Dear God, why staff surveys? And why repeated gee ups to complete "voluntary" staff surveys in order to hit regional targets?

Ian Climacus and Kittyville, you have so hit those nails on the heads!!

Posted by Pigwidgeon (# 10192) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Patdys:

quote:
Originally posted by Ian Climacus:
Work meetings. Why?

Work appraisals? Even more why? Did Jesus do 360 reviews with the Disciples?
I understand Judas was particularly uncomplimentary.

This report from the "Jordan Management Consultants" on the various Apostles has been around for a long time.

Posted by no prophet's flag is set so... (# 15560) on :

Why am I being stalked by Paul Young, his mullet haircut, sensitive new age guy dance moves, and his song Everytime You Go Away. I have heard it 4 times this week in 4 different locations.

Posted by Moo (# 107) on :

Try staying in the same place.

Moo

Posted by Jengie jon (# 273) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Kittyville:
Dear God, why staff surveys? And why repeated gee-ups to complete "voluntary" staff surveys in order to hit regional targets?

Alright, and why do they have to be bunched together. Lets put it this way I think my morale may be rising too its normal level from where it got sunk after answering three of them in one week.

Jengie

Posted by Ian Climacus (# 944) on :

Is this a sign of your wrath on Sydney?

Posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider (# 76) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Jengie jon:

quote:
Originally posted by Kittyville:
Dear God, why staff surveys? And why repeated gee-ups to complete "voluntary" staff surveys in order to hit regional targets?
Alright, and why do they have to be bunched together. Lets put it this way I think my morale may be rising too its normal level from where it got sunk after answering three of them in one week.

Jengie

I just don't do them.

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