Ship of Fools: Best Putdown

Thread: Best Putdown Board: The Simmies 2009 / Ship of Fools.

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Posted by Simon (# 1) on :

A great putdown redraws the battlefield, leaving your opponent nowhere to go. Whether it's a withering one-liner, the pulling apart of a straw man, or a new and intriguing use for a decaying piece of agricultural equipment, we want to honour the author of the best putdown of 2008.

When nominating on this thread, please follow the format shown in the next post. If you don't have all the info you need to complete the nomination fields, you're not yet ready to nominate. Just make a regular post asking for the help of others in finding what you're looking for.

How to find out the URL for an individual post: go to the post and find the tiny page icon which is just to the left of the date (at the top of the post). Right-click the icon (or on a Mac, control-click it) and select "copy link" from the dropdown menu. You can now paste the link URL into your nomination.

Please note: Your nomination post should simply contain your nomination and nothing else.

Posted by Simon (# 1) on :

NOMINATION

I nominate: Shipmate who made the putdown

For: Best Putdown

Posted on the thread: Thread title

URL: Insert clickable link to the individual post here

My reasons for nominating: Your comments in full here

Posted by kingsfold (# 1726) on :

I nominate: Zappa

For: Best Putdown

Posted on the thread: Sir Pellinore
URL: When you kick Jesus off the Right Hand of the Father™, would you whisper a prayer in the ear of the Creator for those of us less perfect than your self?

Thanks (in anticipation, of course).

My reasons for nominating: it's elegant, it's sarcastic, it's subtle but not too subtle ... what more do you need?

[fixed the link]

[ 12. December 2008, 02:34: Message edited by: Scot ]

Posted by Esmeralda (# 582) on :

Kingsfold, your link does not link to the post you think it links to. Only to the thread.

Posted by Sandemaniac (# 12829) on :

Nomination

I nominate: Spiffy

For best putdown

Posted on the thread: This is Science?

URL: You are so clueless, you are standing in the Conservatory holding a Lead Pipe and wondering what all the shouting is about.

Reason: Succint, pithy, funny and utterly appropriate. Spiffy also came out with another blinder here. I can see I'm going to have to keep an eye on her...

AG

Posted by kingsfold (# 1726) on :

Buggeration. Let's try that again...

I nominate: Zappa

For: Best Putdown

Posted on the thread: Sir Pellinore
URL: When you kick Jesus off the Right Hand of the Father™, would you whisper a prayer in the ear of the Creator for those of us less perfect than your self?

Thanks (in anticipation, of course).

Reasons stand as above. Plus it's the sort of thing I wish I'd thought of.

Posted by Yerevan (# 10383) on :

quote:
Originally posted by kingsfold:
Buggeration. Let's try that again...

I nominate: Zappa

For: Best Putdown

Posted on the thread: Sir Pellinore
URL: When you kick Jesus off the Right Hand of the Father™, would you whisper a prayer in the ear of the Creator for those of us less perfect than your self?

Thanks (in anticipation, of course).

Reasons stand as above. Plus it's the sort of thing I wish I'd thought of.

Seconded

Posted by Doublethink (# 1984) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Yerevan:

quote:
Originally posted by kingsfold:
Buggeration. Let's try that again...

I nominate: Zappa
Seconded

Thirded ! (I actually came into styx this evening to post that very quote ...)

Posted by frin (# 9) on :

What a shame that the rules mean that as a host Zappa is not eligible for nomination for this award.

Further nominations are welcome.

'frin
Host of the Shippies

Posted by kingsfold (# 1726) on :

Double buggeration.

Still, even if Zappa isn't eligible, I think it deserves an honourable mention!

Posted by Gwai (# 11076) on :

I will have to wait until I'm off work to post an official nomination, but Spiffy definitely has some putdowns that I think deserve this one.

Posted by Socratic-enigma (# 12074) on :

NOMINATION

I nominate Arrietty

for Best Putdown

on the'Golden Asshat' thread (in Hell)

In response to RuthW's comment

quote:
"As for those complaining about the Golden Asshat Award both here and in the Styx: grow up, get a sense of humor, get a sense of proportion, and get a life."

Arrietty succinctly replied:

quote:
"This could be equally useful advice for those who are getting ratty about people complaining about the Golden Asshat award, of course.

If you don't like complaints about the Golden Asshat award why read them?

'Ouch!' (RuthW slinks off scraping pie from face)

S-E

Posted by Zwingli (# 4438) on :

Such a shame this post by Ken is a month or two too old. It could also have been a nominee for Best Post, Best Hell Denizen, and ironically for Best Theologian.

Posted by kingsfold (# 1726) on :

Now that the rules have been changed, can my nomination of Zappa be reinstated? Or do I have to repost the nomination?

Posted by Flausa (# 3466) on :

Red Carpet Gown on

Kingsfold, there's no need to repost your nomination. We'll be sure to pick it up when putting the poll together.

Red Carpet Gown off

Posted by kingsfold (# 1726) on :

Thanks Flausa.

I am glad it's now included - it was particularly fine!

Posted by Moo (# 107) on :

NOMINATION

I nominate Firenze

For Best Putdown

Posted on You're all Asshats, the lot of you

The woman that rared you would drown nothing.

It is very clear and succinct and so completely dismissive.

Posted by comet (# 10353) on :

so seconded! I am in awe of that woman.

and I'm totally stealing that putdown for my own use, too.

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

Firenze has what is known as 'a way with words'. There are precious few of them posting in the circus (Ariel is another) so they tend to get noticed when they do. I'm glad to see she has been nominated.

Posted by Hart (# 4991) on :

NOMINATION

I nominate Doublethink

For Best Putdown

Posted on thread: Belle Ringer's Church

Link: OP

Reasons: For saying what many were thinking in a much more subtly and cunnily passive aggressive way than I ever thought possible. I'm not sure Belle even realized she was being insulted.

Posted by Geneviève (# 9098) on :

NOMINATION

I nominate: Moo

For: Best Putdown

Thread: Sad Cunts

Link: here

Reason: Moo always uses language precisely and in most cases graciously. Here, however, her response to a regrettable OP is a masterpiece, and without stooping to the crude language of the OP'er.

[ 21. December 2008, 00:28: Message edited by: Geneviève ]

Posted by Rossweisse (# 2349) on :

I second the nomination of Moo. Brava. [Overused]

Ross

Posted by Spike (# 36) on :

NOMINATION

I nominate: dj_ordinaire
Thread: Children and what to do with them (Ecclesiantics)
Link here

Reason: dj_o has a way with words at the best of times anyway, but this one really made me laugh.

[ 24. December 2008, 07:33: Message edited by: Spike ]

Posted by Geneviève (# 9098) on :

Excellent nomination, and especially as it is not in Hell.

Posted by Gort (# 6855) on :

NOMINATION Best Putdown

I nominate: Presleyterian
For: Best Putdown

Posted on the thread: Golden Asshat

URL: Here.

My reasons for nominating:
So many strong contenders but Presley's putdown was not only withering but satisfyingly topical to current events.

[ 30. December 2008, 02:16: Message edited by: Gort ]

Posted by Flausa (# 3466) on :

NOMINATION

I nominate: Preslyterian

For Best Putdown

Posted on the Thread: Golden Asshat

URL: Having the discretion to leave a thought, opinion, or complaint unexpressed isn't a concept I'd expect you to grasp.

My reason for nominating: This putdown is timeless, succint, and expresses an acute knowledge of the opposing poster while being adaptable to a wider target range. Besides which, Preslyterian is probably the only Shipmate whose posting abilities would encourage me to read all her posts again. She can say in less than 2500 posts what it can take others 10000+ much less elegant posts to say. My posts want to be her posts when they grow up.

[ 06. January 2009, 13:48: Message edited by: Flausa ]

Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on :

NOMINATION Best Putdown

I nominate: Presleyterian
For: Best Putdown

Posted on the thread: Golden Asshat

URL: Here.

My reasons for nominating:
I have to 3rd Gort and Flausa because my immediate response upon reading it was "OUCH! Thank God it wasn't me." - the mark, in my mind at least, of a truly excellent putdown.

Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on :

Uhm...my 'reasons for nominating' would make a tiny bit more sense had I linked to Flausa's nominated post, which was actually the one I had in mind.

Posted by RooK (# 1852) on :

My posts want to have Presleyterian's post's babies.

Posted by Gort (# 6855) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
Uhm...my 'reasons for nominating' would make a tiny bit more sense had I linked to Flausa's nominated post, which was actually the one I had in mind.

That'll learn ya to cut and paste my posts. Sure Flausa's link is succinct but this one is better.

Posted by Sine Nomine (# 66) on :

quote:
Originally posted by Gort:
That'll learn ya to cut and paste my posts.

Momma said crime didn't pay. But did I listen? Nah.

Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :

NOMINATION

I nominate: Spiffy

For: Best Putdown

Posted on the thread: The Sunday after Christmas

here

My reasons for nominating: This is a completely unexpected angle on a putdown - not nasty in any sense, but a very funny retort which squarely puts Amos's compliment in a completely new light, as someone trying to get out of doing something by flattery of another. Which wasn't Amos's intention at all.....

Well, it made me laugh, anyway - and right on the last day of the competition, too! [Cool]

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