Thread: VOTE! The Golden Asshat Award Board: The Simmies 2009 / Ship of Fools.


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Posted by Simon (# 1) on :
 
Here are the Ship's very own nominations for The Golden Asshat Award. Please see the post below for the nominated threads... and then vote for your choice.
 

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Posted by Simon (# 1) on :
 
Here are the nominations, in chronological order, for The Golden Asshat Award. Please click and read if possible before casting your vote!

1. Golden Asshat Award (the original thread for nominations, now removed from The Simmies board)

2. Golden Asshat (Hell)

3. The Golden Asshat Award (The Styx)

4. You're all Asshats, the lot of you (Hell)
 

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Posted by Patdys (# 9397) on :
 
Long time reader, first time poster.

I am writing to express my concern that management may not have fully considerd the implications of the effect of community voting for one of these threads. The contributors to the threads in question may become distressed if a thread they have contributed to wins this award.
Could it perhaps be possible to vote for the board on which the thread occurs instead, thus not potentially vilifying a particular thread.

Thankyou,
Concerned of Antipodes
 

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Posted by dj_ordinaire (# 4643) on :
 
Too late to have the voting thread included in the nominations, methinks, Patdys!
 

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Posted by Gort (# 6855) on :
 
Gort slides down rope from ceiling to the stage and shuffles over to the microphone...

Good evening, Ladies and Gentlemen! Doublethink has joined me to present perhaps the most contentious award of the ceremony. A sad visage of its original intention, this award has been reduced to memorializing the heated discussion that quickly followed the original "Golden Asshat Award" for an individual shipmate (subsequently removed by protest).

All that remains are the two threads generated by shipmates who felt moved to voice their angst and concern over the recipient being permanently labeled a pariah (and Alan Cresswell's angry response to the shipwreck that followed).

Personally, I would have been proud to receive the original award as recognition of nearly five years of dedicated effort to maintain my aura of disgruntled disaffection. But, alas, it's not to be. So without further ado...

The thread nominees are:

The original "Golden Asshat Award" in the Simmies (deleted).

"Golden Asshat" by fletcher christian posted in Hell, Dec.11, 10:50am.

quote:

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I'm not overly fussed about the simmies, but I couldn't help but notice that the asshat award is the only truly negative one. Essentially you might as well tar and feather someone and permanently label them as shittiest person on board. I hate to say it, but I suspect this will turn into a bout of bullying, nasty remarks and general unpleasantness.

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quote:

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I think that this is a bad idea. I don’t know whether it was conceived as a bit of end-of-year fun, in the same way as most of the other awards, but after two nominations, it quite clearly isn’t being used as just light-hearted banter. It is, essentially, an invitation to make as nasty a personal attack as one’s wits allow on the Shipmate one likes the least.

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quote:

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For the sake of strict adherence to the rules (and, why didn't you kick up a big fuss about Shipmate of the Year and the other threads that wouldn't normally be allowed?) and 'oooh, we've got to be nice to each other' you managed to succeed in turning a bit of fun into a train wreck from which there was no rescuing the original intention...

So, we lost a place to acknowledge the eccentric people who add spice to the general flavour of the Ship, those who help make us who we are and remind us that God made some quite interesting people. Instead we got a mini-Hell, with fresh attacks launched on nominees, 'unfinished business' from Hell threads resurfacing and attempts to settle scores.

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I now turn the microphone over to our lovely Doublethink who will make the announcement!
 

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Posted by Doublethink (# 1984) on :
 
Doublethink enters, following a momentary delay to locate the envelope, she makes her way upto Gort to stand at the podium.

Thank you Gort. The Simmie goes to ...

There is a dramatic pause

You're all asshats, the lot of you

Doublethink places the Award on the podium for the boldest to claim.
 

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Posted by Gort (# 6855) on :
 
Well done, Doublethink! Congratulations to the lot of you!
 

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Posted by Triple Tiara (# 9556) on :
 
<bites fingernails>

Hopes there won't be any protests and catcalls.

Notices lots of fluffy bunnies in the audience.

This one could go either way!
 

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Posted by Gort (# 6855) on :
 
[Gort dodges tomatoes and rotten fruit as he shuffles off stage to avoid the baying mob]
 

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Posted by Doublethink (# 1984) on :
 
Doublethink waits to see who will take the Golden Asshat, its real goldleaf that
 

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Posted by Yorick (# 12169) on :
 
With surprising speed, dogwonderer, Faust, and Yorick simultaneously clamber up onto the stage and shove their way past Security, dramatically grabbing the Golden Asshat Award from Doublethink (pausing to kiss her beautiful cheek), and, blowing a loud raspberry and thumbing their noses at the audience and side-stage dignitaries, make off with it before anyone has the chance to stop them.

Everyone knows we deserve it. The (Unofficial) Golden Asshat Award is ours!
 

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Posted by Gort (# 6855) on :
 
Awww, RATS! I was hoping to claim it after everyone had left, you sneaky devil!
 

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Posted by Janine (# 3337) on :
 
Are they going to keep it each at their own house for a third of each year? Or are they going to all move in together and thus be with their Simmie always?
 

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Posted by Jahlove (# 10290) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Yorick:
The (Unofficial) Golden Asshat Award is ours!

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Run, Doggie, run like the wind
 

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Posted by Janine (# 3337) on :
 
{... and if they do all move in together, will the psychiatrist who was integrating them now lose his publisher's advance on the book he was writing about them?

Heck, the shrink will now no longer be able to pay for his own counseling, much less the brain-bleach...}

[ 01. February 2009, 17:03: Message edited by: Janine ]
 

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Posted by Qlib (# 43) on :
 

quote:

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... and if they do all move in together, will the psychiatrist who was integrating them now lose his publisher's advance on the book he was writing about them?

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I think we have established that she is already in therapy.
 

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Posted by Alan Cresswell (# 31) on :
 
You're all Asshats. The lot of you.
 

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Posted by Lyda*Rose (# 4544) on :
 
I can die happy.
 

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Posted by Lamb Chopped (# 5528) on :
 
It's a kind of unholy trinity, isn't it? (Or am I thinking of Fluffy, the three-headed dog?)
 

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Posted by Chorister (# 473) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Alan Cresswell:
You're all Asshats. The lot of you.

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You cannot believe how long I've waited to see Alan Cresswell say that.
 

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Posted by Yorick (# 12169) on :
 
Mmm. It’s so shiny and nice.

He he he he.
 

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Posted by dj_ordinaire (# 4643) on :
 
All hail doggie!



 

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Posted by Yorick (# 12169) on :
 
Ouch! He didn't mean stones! Stop that!
 

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Posted by Matt Black (# 2210) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Yorick:
With surprising speed, dogwonderer, Faust, and Yorick simultaneously clamber up onto the stage and shove their way past Security, dramatically grabbing the Golden Asshat Award from Doublethink (pausing to kiss her beautiful cheek),

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Which cheek might that be?
 

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Posted by comet (# 10353) on :
 
how high can a beagle reach?
 

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Posted by Yorick (# 12169) on :
 
How low can a Doublethink sink?
 

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Posted by Doublethink (# 1984) on :
 
Doublethink is in the process of getting up.

I heard that !
 

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Posted by Sir Pellinore (ret'd) (# 12163) on :
 
My fear for you all is that the Golden Asshat may be very much like a Boojum.

You could all disappear forever leaving only DoS to amuse us.
 

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Posted by Yorick (# 12169) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Sir Pellinore (ret'd):
My fear for you all is that the Golden Asshat may be very much like a Boojum.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Doublethink:
Doublethink is in the process of getting up.

I heard that !

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quote:

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Originally posted by Yorick:

quote:

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Originally posted by Sir Pellinore (ret'd):
My fear for you all is that the Golden Asshat may be very much like a Boojum.

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How dare you?! I am most certainly not a geometric pattern on the surface of one of the phases of superfluid helium-3, whose motion can result in the decay of a supercurrent, resulting from a monopole singularity in the bulk of the liquid being drawn to, and then "pinned" on a surface!

If you want to diss me that, kindly take it to Hell.

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