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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Heaven: Homosexuality
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
We haven't had a decent row in Hell in ages, and I had a rotten day. Woke up feeling vaguely homicidal, but NO ONE gave me an excuse to eviscerate them today. And no one came up with forfeits for hellhosts if this whole thing goes south, so to speak. Very remiss of somebody. quote:
Originally posted by Yaffle:
Does Graham Norton exist when nobody's watching? And what are the implications of this for a post-modern calvinist theology which integrates the insights of pelagian neo-orthodoxy, with particular reference to the liturgical revision pioneered by Vatican II?
Who cares? The postmodernists are just making it up as they go along; any good Episcopalian in the US can tell you that they'll drive the church into the ground before they figure out that the butts their heads are up are not merely linguistic constructs. Calvinism cannot be rehabilitated, pace the earnest if rather pale postings in Purgatory. Pelagianism is patently false, and really not even a very interesting heresy; anyone who doesn't believe in original sin and can't see the world for the sorry, stinking, fallen place it is has been smoking way too much cheap weed. "Neo-orthodoxy" is practically a contradiction in terms, and I'm sure the hidebound hands of our Orthodox brothers and sisters will crush it as unworthy. As for the liturgical revisions of Vatican II, see the postmodernists. And who the heck is Graham Norton anyway, and why on earth do You Brits think We Yanks are gonna catch all your references when OUR cultural imperialism has been so much more successful than yours in recent years? I will say one thing for this thread, though: it's the best one on homosexuality I've ever seen. Need I say it? TEAM C
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
I've gathered Team A together for a group hug and then we're going to ascribe queer stereotypes to all the smilies. After that we will all relate our first homosexual or near-miss homosexual encounter in the manner of the 'Which was the first album you bought' thread (which we will do by private message since this is heaven after all).
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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babybear
Bear faced and cheeky with it
# 34
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Posted
I fear I must jump out of the drawer and declare myself for Team A.I also must come clean and declare that it was I who came up with the forfeits for some of the hosts. clare's was that she had to host a round of Mornington Cresent.  We were only half way through the list of hosts when someone (may he be forever blessed) ran over here and divulged the forfeit system. I thought it wisest not to create any more forfeits. But I have seen the error of my ways, and I humbly beg forgiveness for thinking up disagreable tasks for my fellow hosts. bb - the contrite ( and who is worriting that forfeit is not spelt correctly) [I have just run it through a spell-checker, and it looks fine.]
Posts: 13287 | From: Cottage of the 3 Bears (and The Gremlin) | Registered: May 2001
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Nunc Dimittis
Seamstress of Sound
# 848
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Posted
Get your facts straight. Since when has Graham Norton been a US comedian? (Although I have to confess he has made front page news in every Diocesan newspaper in the Anglican Communion.Graham Norton is the Bishop of South Yarrawarrawee. His sexual deviance has been sprouted around the world after he raved naked with a blue light on the front lawn of his episcopal palace. It was revealed by private sources that this behaviour was triggered by excessive stress levels. The Bishop, it was told, was secretly seeing most of the members of his diocese - and apparently had fathered, unbeknowns to any of his partners, several entire families. He apparently "married" several men, who were convinced he was interested in them. Stephen* claims to have had a seamy relationship with the Bishop, which involved nuns and confessionals. "Oh, I never even knew he was a bishop! Although I wondered where he obtained all those FABulous stimulants and sex toys. Well, fancy that!" This feeling is mutual throughout most of Bishop Norton's diocese. His actions have prompted the more evangelical wing of his diocese to demand not only the bishop's resignation, but his deprivation of holy orders. Some have also suggested that the Bishop may require serious psychiatric handling before he make an appearance in public again. Moves are underway to investigate the disappearance of tat from several parishes (originally banned for "lack of the appropriate Faculty"), apparently connected with the Bishop's activities. *All names have been changed to protect individuals' privacy. ___________ Definitely TEAM C. This thread belongs in HELL!!!!  I DEFY anyone to tell me Bishop Norton is not crazy!
Posts: 9515 | From: Delta Quadrant | Registered: Jul 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
I think team C is winning!  And I've run out of heavenly ideas to keep us here. Oh woe. Ooooh. I wonder how many expressions of sadness we can think up...
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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Joan the Outlaw-Dwarf
Ship's curiosity
# 1283
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Posted
*returns group hug*Oh my dear sarky, that was an obvious statement, but tat is never ob
vi
ous especially when
(the rain-time shining) Fiddletats come out to play in Just
Spring
(green for correctness) oops, have I
g
o
n
e
and turned this (always and everywhen)
MW?
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"There is a divine discontent which has always helped to better things."
Posts: 1123 | From: Floating in the blue | Registered: Sep 2001
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Ham'n'Eggs
Ship's Pig
# 629
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Posted
Team G are on a roll!
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"...the heresies that men do leave / Are hated most of those they did deceive" - Will S
Posts: 3103 | From: Genghis Khan's sleep depot | Registered: Jun 2001
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Joan the Outlaw-Dwarf
Ship's curiosity
# 1283
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Posted
Bloody men are like bloody busses -
Which is why it's good we don't need them.
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"There is a divine discontent which has always helped to better things."
Posts: 1123 | From: Floating in the blue | Registered: Sep 2001
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babybear
Bear faced and cheeky with it
# 34
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Joan the Dwarf:
MW?
Honey, don't you even think that! MW has quite enough tat queens already. This thread is obviously suited to Heaven. Just look how many posts it has, in such a short space of time. Heaven is its natural home. Quite a few times in the reading of this thread I have had a major guffaw, twice I have even slapped my desk. I keep getting strange looks from my husband, and he is quite forgiving about SoF-frivolities. This is just Heavenly. bb
Posts: 13287 | From: Cottage of the 3 Bears (and The Gremlin) | Registered: May 2001
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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012
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Posted
RuthW why do you need a reason to eviscarate anyone? You're a hellhost, so use your powers! If you need some practice the stupid frigging idiots who think Heaven's the place to be should do nicely!With all this group hugging, it's obvious Team A have spent worrying amounts of time in group therapy - possibly for alcohol-related problems? And as for the Joan thing... All I can say is RuthW, polish your claws, and go maul someone. Tomb'll show you how, if you need a reminder.. Viki (P.S. If people get flamed in a post, does that send the thread to Hell?)
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“Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Posts: 10787 | Registered: Jul 2001
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Joan the Outlaw-Dwarf
Ship's curiosity
# 1283
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Posted
Of Man's First venture to the Fruit
Of that Forbidden Love, whose silent Name
Brought Balance to the World, yet came in woe,
With loss of'Acceptance, till one greater Man
Restore us, and then gain the blissful Seat,
Sing Heav'nly Muse...
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"There is a divine discontent which has always helped to better things."
Posts: 1123 | From: Floating in the blue | Registered: Sep 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
Well let's! Protest songs included. I'll start with the hoary old chestnut 'We Shall Overcome'.
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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Belisarius
Lord Bountiful of Admin (Emeritus) Delights
# 32
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Posted
From The Drew Carey Show:Misunderstanding Female Character: Are you gay? Drew: Of course I'm not gay! Would I have this kind of [overweight] body if I were gay?
[Edited to avoid a coup for Team C]
[ 28 January 2002: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
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Animals may be Evolution's Icing, but Bacteria are the Cake.
Andrew Knoll
Posts: 8080 | From: New York | Registered: May 2001
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Joan the Outlaw-Dwarf
Ship's curiosity
# 1283
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Posted
A HOMOSEXUAL ther was, a man,
Y lovyere-lik and lusty, cleped "Ann".
He was as fressh as is the month of May,
And ne enow espyen Doris Day.
Upon his arm he baar a gay bracer
(Much liken of the younge Soho pacer),
And hose smal he war on his behind,
And t-shirt wit y-streached in this kind.
Full semely he minced in the strete,
And sayde "Oooo" to al the folk he mete.
And to the ilke sayth to maken hay:
He was a verray, parfit gentil gay.
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"There is a divine discontent which has always helped to better things."
Posts: 1123 | From: Floating in the blue | Registered: Sep 2001
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Scarlet
Mellon Collie
# 1738
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Isegrim:
Isegrim (thats me) wrote:
I challenge everyone to continue posting this thred without using the smilie for the next 20 posts.I bet you can't  !
15 posts later...
Spike wrote:
Sheesh. Yet another brain dead Team A type with no sense of humour who can't tell the difference between a joke and the real thing.
Told you so!!!
BAH HUMBUG !!!!!!  and by the way - is your signature to be taken as a sexual threat ??? (signing on for the C Team - faithfully yours)
[Tsk--Team A has clean up Team C's mess again.]
[ 28 January 2002: Message edited by: Belisarius ]
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They took from their surroundings what was needed... and made of it something more.
—dialogue from Primer
Posts: 4769 | Registered: Nov 2001
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