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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Hell: The world can go to hell
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
Are there any Democrats left? I was under the impression that they had all rolled over and died.
Reader Alexis
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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Katie H. L.
Shipmate
# 1996
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Queen:
erin, I'm sorry you don't find the human race to your taste. But there again it might be your attitude towards other people rather than the people themselves at fault. ![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
Queenie honey, are you joking? Are you? Because if you're not you are seriously in the wrong place, and messing with the wrong person (Erin, that it).
And there are still Democrats left! I'm one..
[sanctimonious voice]and if it is my Christian duty to sacrifice myself so Erin can feel better, I'll be glad to do so [/sanctimonious voice]
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Katie L. just using her middle initial for a while.
Posts: 606 | From: San Francisco, USA | Registered: Dec 2001
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sophs
Sardonic Angel
# 2296
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Posted
Please can someone tell me that Queen didn't tell erin to consider suicide..
please?
Because if she did then she would deserve to be brutally murdered by the hell hosts or erin herself!
It would be a kindness to the human race.
Listen Honey, you don't suggest suicide to people, cos if they are pissed off with humanity they may already want out, and decide to take your advice.
So, in the words of the mighty Erin, Shut the Fuck Up. and next time think before you post.
Asshat.
And Re: the actual topic of the thread... Humanity is so screwed up that God has given up on it. He saw how fucked up he made it and then looked at the world and laughed. Humanity is pure shit, and a nuclear bomb would improve it.
(and yes i am in a bitter and cynical and twisted mood,Oh and Queen, i have considered suicide!)
Posts: 5407 | From: searching saharas of sorrow | Registered: Feb 2002
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
Right on, sophs, that pissed me off, too. And not in a "My, isn't this hellish!" kind of way, either.Erin might have the grace to tell Queenie to talk to the hand, but I think that remark was fucked up. Potty-mouth though she is, I can't remember Erin saying anything that cold to anyone.
I guess the difference is where your heart is.
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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The Riv
Shipmate
# 3553
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Posted
Too much of life is having to deal with people and not being able to enjoy them.
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"I don't know whether I like it, but it's what I meant." Ralph Vaughan Williams
"Riv, you've done a much better job communicating your passion than your point. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about." Tom Clune
Posts: 2749 | From: Too far South, USA. I really want to move. | Registered: Nov 2002
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
Queenie-poo:
Ditto what Sophs and Kelly said.
You should never, ever say that to anybody. ![[Mad]](angryfire.gif)
You're way off base.
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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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Nunc Dimittis
Seamstress of Sound
# 848
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Posted
Erin, remind me what your favourite favouritest chocolate is?
Posts: 9515 | From: Delta Quadrant | Registered: Jul 2001
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The Riv
Shipmate
# 3553
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Posted
Oh yeah, and Emperess (a.k.a. Queen)?
You're wearing no clothes.
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"I don't know whether I like it, but it's what I meant." Ralph Vaughan Williams
"Riv, you've done a much better job communicating your passion than your point. I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about." Tom Clune
Posts: 2749 | From: Too far South, USA. I really want to move. | Registered: Nov 2002
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sophs
Sardonic Angel
# 2296
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Nunc Dimittis:
Erin, remind me what your favourite favouritest chocolate is?
Erin likes Green and Blacks White Choclate.
but i think i should get some for telling you this ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
Posts: 5407 | From: searching saharas of sorrow | Registered: Feb 2002
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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012
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Posted
Hey y'all. Tis a certain lady's (I use this word loosely ![[Wink]](wink.gif) ) birthday soon, and I think a troll is always a nice present.
So quit with the slapping, and leave it to... Erin.
Viki
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“Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Posts: 10787 | Registered: Jul 2001
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
*sigh*
It's my fault, I suppose, for letting up on my daily practice of beating the everliving shit out of newbies just because I can. I don't really have time for this right now, but I am willing to make the sacrifice for the sake of the Ship.
In some other thread, our current Village Idiot told a long-time member that "we didn't need any Nazi supporters around here". Remind me who the fuck you are, and when I gave you permission to pass judgment on who we do and do not need around here. I'll let you know when you've put in enough time to spout off with those sorts of things. Until then, the syphilitic goat carcass is in need of servicing.
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
Viki: ![[Yipee]](graemlins/spin.gif)
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
Let's see.
The Queen has made seven posts and two of them have been very far out of line.
I think that's some kind of record.
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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Scot
Deck hand
# 2095
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Posted
That's it?
Some people have the staying power of a fart in a whirlwind.
I'm looking at a full day of dealing with asshats, and I had planned to deal with it by mentally tossing them into the pit with Erin. Unfortunately her last meal seems to have succumbed quickly, leaving her laying in the sun, semi-comatose, while she digests.
Now what am I going to do for a safety valve? Someone's going to get hurt today.
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“Here, we are not afraid to follow truth wherever it may lead, nor tolerate any error so long as reason is left free to combat it.” - Thomas Jefferson
Posts: 9515 | From: Southern California | Registered: Jan 2002
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Moth
Shipmate
# 2589
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Posted
I first read this thread not long after the OP yesterday. 'Right,' I thought, 'I have a spare 15 minutes, what can I post to cheer Erin up?'. I thought long and hard about hugs and kindly meant advice, but my asbestos wings are at the cleaners, and I'm not the stuff of which martyrs are made.
So I thought I'd post her a nice link to a Dilbert cartoon, the one where he says he hates everyone - even tiny babies he's never met are just weasels. But it's not in the archive any more, so that plan failed. ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
Next, I rememembered a nice little news item I'd heard on Radio 4 about crocodile-eating toads, but I couldn't find it on the website, and maybe I just imagined it. I was half-asleep when I heard it, and naturally enough, alligators haunt my nightmares, as I'm sure they do every shipmate's. So that idea went the way of the first. (But I did discover a type of bell-ringing called 'erin sextuples' . That worried me a lot...).
Then I recollected to myself a charming little song ShadoK sings around the house from time to time, entitled 'People ain't no good', originally by, apparently, as I discovered on enquiry to him, a popular beat combo known as 'The Cramps'. I looked for a nice link to the lyrics or music on the web and... you've guessed it, no such link could I unearth. I did learn a lot about menstrual cramps, though. ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
So that was 15 minutes wasted and no post. ![[brick wall]](graemlins/brick_wall.gif)
However, I see a nice troll came trip-trapping by for you to play with, so maybe you won't mind!
So I posted this to let you know I did try. I am just a miserable failure at keeping you happy, just like everyone else!
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
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"There are governments that burn books, and then there are those that sell the libraries and shut the universities to anyone who can't pay for a key." Laurie Penny.
Posts: 3446 | From: England | Registered: Apr 2002
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Nightlamp
Shipmate
# 266
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Posted
Do ya think the troll has gone or has been eaten?
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I don't know what you are talking about so it couldn't have been that important- Nightlamp
Posts: 8442 | From: Midlands | Registered: May 2001
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Merseymike
Shipmate
# 3022
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Posted
This is more like it. Erin back to normal. I was starting to get worried.
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Christianity is not a problem to be solved, but a mystery to be experienced
Posts: 3360 | From: Walked the plank | Registered: Jul 2002
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
Don't you worry, Mikey, normal service will resume as soon as the Ark is over.
And while I do appreciate the efforts to cheer me up (and I am SO THANKFUL for the troll y'all gave me as an early birthday present), I'm just PMSing. As soon as I medicate myself with chocolate and salt I'll be mellow again.
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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heathen mama
Shipmate
# 3767
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Posted
Yesterday a motorist died on I-95 after hitting a cow. Sarky, the effort you put in to cheer Erin up is truly impressive!
For my part, I have sent a 5lb box of Chocolate-Covered Salty Trolls and a Michael Dukakis chew toy.
HM, who is currently strapping on her Republican-proof chain mail and heading to colder climes.
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I shaved my armpits for *this*?
Posts: 569 | From: the first state | Registered: Dec 2002
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duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Scot:
Some people have the staying power of a fart in a whirlwind.
[Kansas long haired dude] ![[Votive]](graemlins/votive.gif) Dust in the wind, all we are is dust in the wind....ooooohhhhhh whoooooaaaa oooohhhh... [violin solo]
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♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
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ChastMastr
Shipmate
# 716
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
(Refraining from joining the "maggoty eyes of Jesus" debate. This has got to be the most macabre derailment I have ever seen.)
I could...
No, better not. ![[Projectile]](graemlins/puke2.gif)
David
has no intention of posting links to Uruk-hai slash fiction, here or anywhere else. Barf...
quote:
Originally posted by The Wonderful Nanny Ogg:
quote:
Originally posted by chukovsky:
Yes, you can, if it's the right kind of can. That's how you make banoffee pie too.
Oh no - NOT banoffee pie ![[Help]](graemlins/help.gif)
I remember banoffee pie. Man, that was weird. Weirder still was that it was called "American style banoffee pie." (As you may guess, banana-toffee flavour is... utterly unknown in the US.) I did not, alas, get to taste it. But the concept sounded pretty odd.
Oh, and sophs: ![[Not worthy!]](graemlins/notworthy.gif) Well said!
quote:
Originally posted by Scot:
Some people have the staying power of a fart in a whirlwind.
"You have sown the fart, now you must reap the whirlwind."
quote:
Originally posted by Scot:
Now what am I going to do for a safety valve? Someone's going to get hurt today.
You know, this has got to be the gassiest thread I've seen on the Ship.
... OH! I just figured out what people are betting on! How long till the Queen is eaten!
I'm really slow.
Erin, you have whatever hugs I am permitted to give here, for what it is worth.
David
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My essays on comics continuity: http://chastmastr.tumblr.com/tagged/continuity
Posts: 14068 | From: Clearwater, Florida | Registered: Jul 2001
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sophs
Sardonic Angel
# 2296
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Posted
Has The Queen gone? I was looking forward to some more dumb ass comments so i could practice insulting people ![[Waterworks]](graemlins/bawling.gif)
i wanna play with a troll
Posts: 5407 | From: searching saharas of sorrow | Registered: Feb 2002
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Mad Geo
Ship's navel gazer
# 2939
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Posted
Damn, and I almost went for May 5th.....
Always a pleasure to watch Erin service new trolls.
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Diax's Rake - "Never believe a thing simply because you want it to be true"
Posts: 11730 | From: People's Republic of SoCal | Registered: Jun 2002
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Moth
Shipmate
# 2589
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by sophs:
Has The Queen gone? I was looking forward to some more dumb ass comments so i could practice insulting people
i wanna play with a troll
This is the most shocking thing on this thread so far. I remember Sophs when she was a Really Nice Girl, and scz used to rush about pming us in the cafe to remind us how young and innocent she was!
Who could have corrupted her so?
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"There are governments that burn books, and then there are those that sell the libraries and shut the universities to anyone who can't pay for a key." Laurie Penny.
Posts: 3446 | From: England | Registered: Apr 2002
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by ChastMastr:
has no intention of posting links to Uruk-hai slash fiction, here or anywhere else. Barf...
You know, until just now I had no idea there was such a thing as Uruk-hai slash fiction. And I could have LIVED A LONG TIME WITHOUT THIS KNOWLEDGE, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Moth:
Who could have corrupted her so?
It was a community effort.
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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ChastMastr
Shipmate
# 716
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by duchess:
[Kansas long haired dude] Dust in the wind, all we are is dust in the wind....ooooohhhhhh whoooooaaaa oooohhhh... [violin solo]
Hmmm, you may like Kerry Livgren's later religious albums then...
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My essays on comics continuity: http://chastmastr.tumblr.com/tagged/continuity
Posts: 14068 | From: Clearwater, Florida | Registered: Jul 2001
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jlg
What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98
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Posted
The Troll with the Tiara was last seen in MW, where I almost took a chunk out of her myself. It will give me great pleasure to bring her to the attention of Erin's teeth. If the Tiara-wearing one doesn't show up, MW has another couple of newbies who show signs of troll-potential.
By the way, Erin, be glad you're an extrovert -- some of find your OP describes the general condition of life, not just a bad day or two.
Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RuthW:
You know, until just now I had no idea there was such a thing as Uruk-hai slash fiction. And I could have LIVED A LONG TIME WITHOUT THIS KNOWLEDGE, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!
Welcome to the information age, Ms W.
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Nightlamp
Shipmate
# 266
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Posted
I feel that the queen was a brain dead bloke but I could be 50% wrong.
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I don't know what you are talking about so it couldn't have been that important- Nightlamp
Posts: 8442 | From: Midlands | Registered: May 2001
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Mad Geo
Ship's navel gazer
# 2939
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Posted
Or 52% right.
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Diax's Rake - "Never believe a thing simply because you want it to be true"
Posts: 11730 | From: People's Republic of SoCal | Registered: Jun 2002
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MadKaren
Shipmate
# 1033
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
I don't think you need any specific eyeballs to see people in a manner similar to the way Jesus was reported to have done. All you have to do squeeze your eyes shut, to avoid seeing all their stinking filthy flaws, and chant loudly "la la la la, I know you're all nice in some way".
Which jesus are you talking about RooK honey??
madKaren
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--
Why do people who claim to love God embarrass him in public?
Posts: 866 | From: Jumping along the line between genius and insanity.... | Registered: Aug 2001
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babybear
Bear faced and cheeky with it
# 34
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by sophs:
Erin likes Green and Blacks White Choclate.
Erin likes green things. Green (and Black) chocolate, green emeralds, greenbacks (but only in large quantities). She also like green bugs, cos you can suck out the green goo, and then they taste like chicken!
bb
Posts: 13287 | From: Cottage of the 3 Bears (and The Gremlin) | Registered: May 2001
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Ham'n'Eggs
Ship's Pig
# 629
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Posted
His personal Jesus, of course!
Perhaps a trade in for a better model is overdue?
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"...the heresies that men do leave / Are hated most of those they did deceive" - Will S
Posts: 3103 | From: Genghis Khan's sleep depot | Registered: Jun 2001
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
Sounds OK, just so long as the new one doesn't clash with the black leather upholstry of my car.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
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Posted
Any Jesus at all would be an improvement in Rook's life. He secretly wants to be SAVED BY THE BLOOD OF THE CROSS...COME TO JESUS HOCKEY PUCK. HE WANTS YOU SO BADLY. ![[Love]](graemlins/lovedrops.gif) ![[Tear]](graemlins/tear.gif)
(Erin, the chocolates you got today make you overlook my continue prophesizing of the heathen. I hope my bribe was tasty). ![[Two face]](graemlins/scot_twoface.gif)
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♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
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KenWritez
Shipmate
# 3238
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by duchess:
(Erin, the chocolates you got today make you overlook my continue prophesizing of the heathen. I hope my bribe was tasty).
duchess, my precious NoCal poppet, I entreat you to grab your dictionary and look up the words "prophesy" and "proselytize."
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"The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd." --Quentin Tarantino, Pulp Fiction
My blog: http://oxygenofgrace.blogspot.com
Posts: 11102 | From: Left coast of Wonderland, by the rabbit hole | Registered: Aug 2002
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Ham'n'Eggs
Ship's Pig
# 629
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Posted
Shouldn't that read "COME TO JESUS' HOCKEY PUCK"?
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"...the heresies that men do leave / Are hated most of those they did deceive" - Will S
Posts: 3103 | From: Genghis Khan's sleep depot | Registered: Jun 2001
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
There seem to be some very serious misconceptions floating around this thread.
The worst of which being the assumption that I have not found Jesus. I have. He was on the Crowsnest Highway (#3) heading West. Gave him a lift, and converted him to Platypusism. Boy, did he feel silly after I explained to him how the universe really worked.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Joyeux
Ship's Lady of Laughter
# 3851
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
There seem to be some very serious misconceptions floating around this thread.
The worst of which being the assumption that I have not found Jesus. I have. He was on the Crowsnest Highway (#3) heading West. Gave him a lift, and converted him to Platypusism. Boy, did he feel silly after I explained to him how the universe really worked.
After which you left him behind the sofa for someone else to find?
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Float?...Do science too
Posts: 4318 | From: over th... no, there! | Registered: Dec 2002
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Ham'n'Eggs
Ship's Pig
# 629
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Posted
Duchess, I would get a refund on that stalker's correspondance course.
I think that you will find a dart-gun to be the correct tool for the job.
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"...the heresies that men do leave / Are hated most of those they did deceive" - Will S
Posts: 3103 | From: Genghis Khan's sleep depot | Registered: Jun 2001
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Nightlamp
Shipmate
# 266
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Posted
Duchess you could practice on RooK.
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I don't know what you are talking about so it couldn't have been that important- Nightlamp
Posts: 8442 | From: Midlands | Registered: May 2001
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Mad Geo
Ship's navel gazer
# 2939
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Posted
Kenwritez
Do you think she she meant to prophesize to the proselytized?
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Diax's Rake - "Never believe a thing simply because you want it to be true"
Posts: 11730 | From: People's Republic of SoCal | Registered: Jun 2002
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duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
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Posted
duchess says to self..Darn spell checker...better do a cya here... ![[Embarrassed]](icon_redface.gif)
NOTE:I must address all these concerns... ![[Cool]](cool.gif)
kenwritez - I meant to say I am predicting the future here. Yeah, that's it...that's what I meant. He already is looking for Jesus in his idol...THE CAR
Ham'n'Eggs - I can stalk him secretly in California. I am too darn lazy to drive up to Portland/Newberg/Salem...whatever the ex-pat hockey puck lives in OR and use a dart gun. I would instead beat him over the head with a bible, a more painful weapon for heathen hockey pucks.
Joyeux - He finds Jesus in his idol...THE CAR. He may have the sofa as another idol but I don't know. Let's deal with Rook's idols one at a time (besides that's my idol...I like sitting on my fat-a*& and watching movies).
Nightlamp - See above, in Ham'n'Eggs answer/reply.
Mad Geo - YES YES I did. TEE-HEE.
Rook - Good boy. Use the force, leave the dark side. Jesus is waiting for you. Shine Jesus Shine.
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♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
|
Posted
quote:
Originally posted by madkaren:
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
I don't think you need any specific eyeballs to see people in a manner similar to the way Jesus was reported to have done. All you have to do squeeze your eyes shut, to avoid seeing all their stinking filthy flaws, and chant loudly "la la la la, I know you're all nice in some way".
Which jesus are you talking about RooK honey??
madKaren
(wanders in feeling suicidal.)
RooK, I'd think you of all people would be grateful that some people operate this way.
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
And Erin? I thought PMS made you nice.
(wanders off to tightrope walk the yellow line on a freeway.)
(P.S Happy birthday to St. Erin of the Everglades)
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
ACK!
Axe-blade in the back! Et tu, Bunnius?
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
Sorry, dude, axe was on auto pilot. Anyone got any paper towels?
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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The Queen
Apprentice
# 4489
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Posted
erin if you are feeling suicidal go and see a counsellor. keep away from heroine and drugs like that because those things wont help your depression. i shall pray for you. sounds like you need jesus.
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Subjects: You SHALL continue to curtsy anad bow to me at Wimbledon. If you don't you shall spend eternity in the presence of my sister Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen.
Posts: 15 | From: SOCKPUPPET | Registered: May 2003
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
Is anyone else waiting for Rod Serling to walk on-camera and explain what the fuck happened to The Queen's brain?
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
IMHO:
Either The Queen is a diehard troll wearing a thick asbestos suit
or
She's serious.
For everyone's sake (hers included), I hope it's the former. ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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