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Source: (consider it) Thread: Hell: Calling Erin to Hell
JimT

Ship'th Mythtic
# 142

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I Retort in the Style of JohnBoot that your petty experiences of offense are nothing in the face of centuries of Hideous Protestant Oppression of Catholics.
Posts: 2619 | From: Now On | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Ancient Mariner*
SOF Co-editor
# 105

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This thread has meandered so drearily in the past day or so that I may have to start preaching stewardship again if it doesn't pick up...

[Devil]

Posts: 1087 | From: St Helens (near Liverpool) UK | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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quote:
Originally posted by Grits:
quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:
I admit that I don't understand people who use the word "retard" as a jocular form of opprobrium.

Retard is a word from my youth. I believe my brother and I were especially fond of calling one another that. It's even more pointed when preceded by "You big...", "You stupid...", or any other appropriate adjective. For the Ship of Fools, I guess that adjective would be "King".
I guess if a person uses language like this as a child, and the person's parents do not make the proper correction, that person grows up and thinks that this is appropriate language.

I blame the parents.

Posts: 789 | From: Detroit | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged
Lyda*Rose

Ship's broken porthole
# 4544

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quote:
Originally posted by JimT:
I Retort in the Style of JohnBoot that your petty experiences of offense are nothing in the face of centuries of Hideous Protestant Oppression of Catholics.

I take offence in the Style of JohnBoot that only Catholics suffer Hideous Protestant Oppression. What of the members of churches (small c) of Christ or non-denoms that are endlessly mistaken to be Protestants and receive the contempt of such anti-Prots as JohnBoot?

(Such people even casting aspersions on others' kitchen designs. [Disappointed] )

[ 06. April 2004, 16:07: Message edited by: Lyda D'Flowerd ]

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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

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Anselmina
Ship's barmaid
# 3032

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quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:

I blame the parents.

Spookily enough, I was just thinking of you, JB, and I thought exactly the same thing [Biased] !

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Irish dogs needing homes! http://www.dogactionwelfaregroup.ie/ Greyhounds and Lurchers are shipped over to England for rehoming too!

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Callan
Shipmate
# 525

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Originally posted by Lyda D'Flowered:

quote:
I take offence in the Style of JohnBoot that only Catholics suffer Hideous Protestant Oppression. What of the members of churches (small c) of Christ or non-denoms that are endlessly mistaken to be Protestants and receive the contempt of such anti-Prots as JohnBoot?
Hah! I take offence in the Style of JohnBoot on behalf of all those Protestants who have suffered at the hands of Catholic oppression. Did Latimer, Ridley and Cranmer suffer in vain?

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How easy it would be to live in England, if only one did not love her. - G.K. Chesterton

Posts: 9757 | From: Citizen of the World | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Alan Cresswell

Mad Scientist 先生
# 31

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quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:
I blame the parents.

I Take Offence in the Style of JohnBoot at your evident bigotry against parents.

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Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.

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Sine Nomine*

Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631

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quote:
Originally posted by Anselmina:
quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:

I blame the parents.

Spookily enough, I was just thinking of you, JB, and I thought exactly the same thing [Biased] !
Doesn't it seem more likely he was raised by the sisters in an orphanage. And that the other children teased him and called him a retard? And the only one who was, uh, kind to him was dear Father O'Malley who sat him on his, uh, knee and told him stories about the Old Country?

That would explain a lot. Not everything, but a lot.

I apologize in advance if I have offended any other retard orphan shipmates or their relatives. No. Wait. If they're orphans they don't have any relatives. Never mind.

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JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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quote:
Originally posted by Anselmina:
quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:

I blame the parents.

Spookily enough, I was just thinking of you, JB, and I thought exactly the same thing [Biased] !
Ah, Ms. Anselmina, it is kind of you to weigh in.

A short post, but might I make a suggestion? Avoid clumsy adverbs. Yes, "spookily" is the adverbial form of "spooky", and yes, you should be able to use it, but it trips "clumsily" off the tongue.

It's not fair, but we're trapped within the language we use.

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Alan Cresswell

Mad Scientist 先生
# 31

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quote:
Originally posted by Simply 'Normous:
If they're orphans they don't have any relatives.

Unless they have brothers or sisters. Maybe aunts or uncles, cousins, grandparents, nephews, nieces, children of their own ...

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Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.

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Sine Nomine*

Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631

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quote:
Originally posted by Alan Cresswell:
Unless they have brothers or sisters. Maybe aunts or uncles, cousins, grandparents, nephews, nieces, children of their own ...

Well yes, there is that. But I was going after pathos, or bathos, as the case may be. Picturing JohnBoot as a sort of Oliver Twist. Or maybe Little Nell. Who knows.
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JimT

Ship'th Mythtic
# 142

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But JohnBoot, what are we to think of parents who allow their children to grow up in a polarized world of Catholic/Protestant when the one they worship as Lord instructed Jews to view Samaritans as neighbors? When the founding saint who first systematized their theology refused to divide the world into Jew and Gentile after the coming of Christ?

JohnBoot. You're a good Catholic lad. Justice is not possible in the case of the death of innocents. Death of the guilty cannot restore the innocent to life and innocent blood from "the other side" only compounds the error. Unity under some banner of brotherhood is the only way forward. In the case of Catholic and Protestant, why would good parents and good children not make the banner of unity "Christian" and dispense with the artificial distinction, more likely from Satan than Christ, of "Catholic" and "Protestant?"

Posts: 2619 | From: Now On | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Og: Thread Killer
Ship's token CN Mennonite
# 3200

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quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:

It's not fair, but we're trapped within the language we use.

That language is rather inclusive actually and is hardly trapping us; I believe you are speaking about the cultural trap of believing you have to use what when. But, being trapped by culture would not be unusual for you, eh? [Razz]

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I wish I was seeking justice loving mercy and walking humbly but... "Cease to lament for that thou canst not help, And study help for that which thou lament'st."

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Twilight

Puddleglum's sister
# 2832

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As in the tradition of royalty, I knew little of the King until the day we were crowned. Now I'm getting to know him and I must admit I am very impressed.

In this one thread he has bravely defended people with mental problems (it really is crude and insensitive to use the term "retard" as an insult), he has been helpful with grammar tips and he has irritated Anselmina. I like him!

Shyly,
Queen Twlight

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Og: Thread Killer
Ship's token CN Mennonite
# 3200

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Yes, but his mistress is the Whore of Babylon.


I can just see the 16th century woodcutting now. [Yipee]

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I wish I was seeking justice loving mercy and walking humbly but... "Cease to lament for that thou canst not help, And study help for that which thou lament'st."

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Ultraspike

Incensemeister
# 268

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Maybe we should start a dating agency here in Hell. [Devil]

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A cowgirl's work is never done.

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RooK

1 of 6
# 1852

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Imagine if JohnBoot and Sasha were to breed...
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JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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Er, Ms. Ultraspike, I'm sure you're a wonderful person and that the beauty of Our Creator shines in your face and your figure and your mind, but you're just not my type.

Sine, I believe, though, per the governmental records of the county in which he resides, is single.

Posts: 789 | From: Detroit | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged
Twilight

Puddleglum's sister
# 2832

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Did y'all see how I made the advances yet Ultraspike got the rejection?

It's good to be the queen!

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Sine Nomine*

Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631

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quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
(it really is crude and insensitive to use the term "retard" as an insult)

Yeah. Well, duh. Welcome to Hell, home of the crude and insensitive. I also pick my nose and eat boogers.

I mean, Sasha, what do you do for fun? Oh, right. Start threads in the Styx. Ah well. To each his or her own. What a dull world it would be if we all liked the same things.

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JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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quote:
Originally posted by Simply 'Normous:
I also pick my nose and eat boogers.

Note to Ms. Ultraspike: ignore previous post.
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2

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I don't remember designating anything but a king.

--------------------
Commandment number one: shut the hell up.

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Twilight

Puddleglum's sister
# 2832

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You know what really gets me about you Sine Nomine? You float across this ship all day every day saying any catty, flippant thing that comes to mind with a totally free pass. Time after time I get suckered into a carefree, light hearted, albeit teasing, frame of mind that YOU have started and so I respond in kind and then get burned for it.

My post was joking - any fool should have been able to see that - but noooo - you're going to pick out a mild reprimand about the use of "retard" and make a big deal about it. No one does that to you. No one says , "Oh my Sine's so awful, he just implied that all Catholic priests are pedophiles!" Of course not . Sine is always given the benefit of the doubt. Sine was just kidding. Well other people can kid too, you don't own this board as much s you've been acting like it lately. What a huge wet blanket you can be when it's not your joke.

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NO
Shipmate
# 5477

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Ahh, that'll be because Sine's part of the in-crowd

...or was it because the Admins have all got something against you and treat you unfairly?

...or maybe ...

Oh I don't know, what's your whinge this time? I lose track. Do send me a message if you want me to start your special "I've been hard-done-by" thread for you, in case you're worrying you might accidentally come up with a spectacularly offensive title again like last time. Would you like it in the Styx or Hell?

[spelling]

[ 06. April 2004, 19:58: Message edited by: Norman the Organ ]

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JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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Second note to Ms. Ultraspike: What a scatterbrain suis je! I meant to fix you up with simon, not sine.
Posts: 789 | From: Detroit | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged
Twilight

Puddleglum's sister
# 2832

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quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
I don't remember designating anything but a king.

As the only woman in the "list" I sort of assumed the position. [Biased]

I was going to ask you first, Erin but I didn't want to bother you.

Anyway, Sine just threw a bucket of cold water on my humor mood so I'll abdicate without a fuss.

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Ultraspike

Incensemeister
# 268

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Um, Boot, if you're referring to Captain Simon, he's married. Otherwise I'd go for him in a New York minute. [Big Grin]

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A cowgirl's work is never done.

Posts: 2732 | From: NYC | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Anna B
Shipmate
# 1439

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quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
I sort of assumed the position

Skip the "sort of"---it spoils the view. [Snigger]

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Bad Christian (TM)

Posts: 3069 | From: near a lot of fish | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Sine Nomine*

Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631

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quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
You know what really gets me about you Sine Nomine? You float across this ship all day every day saying any catty, flippant thing that comes to mind with a totally free pass.

I beg your pardon, ma'am. I'll have you know I've been called to Hell twice. I realize that's not a lot by your standards, but it meant a lot to me, and I'll thank you not to belittle it.

quote:

Time after time I get suckered into a carefree, light hearted, albeit teasing, frame of mind that YOU have started and so I respond in kind and then get burned for it.

Sucker.

quote:


My post was joking - any fool should have been able to see that

My post was also joking - any fool should have been able to see that.

quote:

No one says , "Oh my Sine's so awful, he just implied that all Catholic priests are pedophiles!"

Now where did I do that? Oh, you mean the "uh,". Well you see dear, that's just the thing. It's subtle and hard to be called on. I mean you can't just call someone to Hell for "uh", can you? Unfortunately subtlety is just not your thing, and that's a lot of what gets you into trouble. I mean if your best friends won't tell you...

And I'll also give you one of my personal rules to live by: Never start a thread in the Styx. In fact I try to avoid even posting on threads in the Styx. But then that's because I'm an obsequious little ass-kisser. But it makes for a quiet life. You, however, seem to enjoy turmoil. Whatever floats your boat.

quote:

you don't own this board as much as you've been acting like it lately.

Did I mention I made a very generous donation to the organ fund? Yes. I think I did. About six times.
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RooK

1 of 6
# 1852

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(And the rest of the In-Crowd trembles with horror, wondering how their paragon of panache can possibly defend himself from such a withering attack!)

Dammit, Sasha! Can't you just understand that Siné suffers horribly from rug burns, and we need to grant him extra leniency for his horrid behaviour? You're such an inconsiderate bitch.

[damnedest crosspost ever]

Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged
JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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quote:
Originally posted by Ultraspike:
Um, Boot, if you're referring to Captain Simon, he's married. Otherwise I'd go for him in a New York minute. [Big Grin]

Er no, no military Simon, rather my friend Simon. He can be quite garulous about his newt collection, and when he get's excited, you can sometimes tell that he has a pulse. He looks like George Costanza, but not quite as skin-and-bones-ish. He's single!
Posts: 789 | From: Detroit | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged
chive

Ship's nude
# 208

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quote:
Originally posted by someone or other:

He can be quite garulous

Spelling [Roll Eyes]

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'Edward was the kind of man who thought there was no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who hadn't done one-to-one Bible study with him.' Catherine Fox, Love to the Lost

Posts: 3542 | From: the cupboard under the stairs | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
RooK

1 of 6
# 1852

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Right then. That makes perfect sense, JohnBoot. Or, rather, it helps reaffirm the sense we've made of your previous assertions.

You're an idjit.

[ 06. April 2004, 20:43: Message edited by: RooK ]

Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged
Stoo

Mighty Pirate
# 254

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quote:
Originally posted by chive:
quote:
Originally posted by someone or other:

He can be quite garulous

Spelling [Roll Eyes]
Not to mention the abuse of the apostrophe.

I Take Offence in the Style of JohnBoot on behalf of all used and abused apostrophes out there...

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This space left blank

Posts: 5266 | From: the director of "Bikini Traffic School" | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Chorister

Completely Frocked
# 473

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quote:
Originally posted by Ancient Marina:
This thread has meandered so drearily in the past day or so that I may have to start preaching stewardship again if it doesn't pick up...

[Devil]

You could always start a stake on who would Erin most like to marry.....
(but would people want to pay twice?)

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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.

Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Twilight

Puddleglum's sister
# 2832

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quote:
Never start a thread in the Styx. In fact I try to avoid even posting on threads in the Styx.
When I first came here I started a few threads in Styx because Hosts would say to me, "If you want to discuss, [such and such] please start a thread in Styx. I foolishly thought they wanted me to do the thing they suggested. In time, I learned not to believe them and it has now been a long time since I started one.

I know I haven't started a thread in Styx since Norman the Toady arrived. What a mindless follower he is to jump on someone he doesn't know for something he has never seen.

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NO
Shipmate
# 5477

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No, you started it in Hell. Rarely have I seen anyone make such a prat of themselves.
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NO
Shipmate
# 5477

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Oh, and yes I have seen one of your efforts in the Styx as well.

[ 06. April 2004, 20:54: Message edited by: Norman the Organ ]

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RooK

1 of 6
# 1852

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Ah yes, The Auger Incident ended up as a Sasha-thread in the Styx as I recall.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged
Ultraspike

Incensemeister
# 268

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quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:
He can be quite garulous about his newt collection, and when he get's excited, you can sometimes tell that he has a pulse.

Thanks, but I prefer iguanas.

quote:
He looks like George Costanza, but not quite as skin-and-bones-ish.
George Costanza is fat. [Roll Eyes]

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A cowgirl's work is never done.

Posts: 2732 | From: NYC | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Papio

Ship's baboon
# 4201

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quote:
Origianally Posted by Twilight
I know I haven't started a thread in Styx since Norman the Toady arrived. What a mindless follower he is to jump on someone he doesn't know for something he has never seen

Norman seems to have been reading up on old threads and to have been following this one. Good for him. The thing is, Twilight, that you feel able to judge Chive, Norman, Pants, Shuggie, Sine, Erin, Mousethief and myself (to name a few) even though you have never met any of us and we are all totally different people. If anybody decides on the evidence of your posts that you are a fuckwit, on the other hand, then they are clearly stupid because they haven't met you?

What sort of bizarre double standard is that?

[ 06. April 2004, 20:59: Message edited by: Papio* ]

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Infinite Penguins.
My "Readit, Swapit" page
My "LibraryThing" page

Posts: 12176 | From: a zoo in England. | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged
kingsfold

Shipmate
# 1726

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quote:
posted by Choristerrrrrrrrr:
You could always start a stake on who would Erin most like to marry.....(but would people want to pay twice?)

What do you think? I reckon you'd get a load more donations! Though Raspberry Rabbit might have something to say... [Devil]
(toddles off to make Organ Fund donation)

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I came to Jesus and I found in him my star, my sun.
And in that light of life I'll walk 'til travelling days are done


Posts: 4473 | From: land of the wee midgie | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged
JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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I must thank the Messieurs chive, Rook and Stoo for their sharp-eyed corrections of my spelling and punctuation. You three hold me to a higher standard than anyone else on this thread - as you should - and I thank you!

I'll try not to let you three down again.

Posts: 789 | From: Detroit | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged
chive

Ship's nude
# 208

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quote:
Originally posted by some brainless donkey:

I must thank the Messieurs chive...

For the second time in this thread, I am a woman

Do I need to show you all my fucking tits or something? [Roll Eyes]

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'Edward was the kind of man who thought there was no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who hadn't done one-to-one Bible study with him.' Catherine Fox, Love to the Lost

Posts: 3542 | From: the cupboard under the stairs | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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quote:
Originally posted by Ultraspike:

quote:
He looks like George Costanza, but not quite as skin-and-bones-ish.
George Costanza is fat. [Roll Eyes]
Er, that was a bit of waffling on my part. Simon rather likes those containers of ready-mixed cake frosting that you can buy at your Superette. He can lick a half dozen of them out in an evening - did I mention that he has a very talented tongue?
Posts: 789 | From: Detroit | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged
duchess

Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764

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quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:
I must thank the Messieurs chive, Rook and Stoo for their sharp-eyed corrections of my spelling and punctuation. You three hold me to a higher standard than anyone else on this thread - as you should - and I thank you!

I'll try not to let you three down again.

Here's your sign




JOHNBOOT
KING OF DEM RETARDZ

Let all read as he makes haste to the award show


BTW, I am an INFJ, if anybody cares. My work just recently paid for my test.

[ 06. April 2004, 21:09: Message edited by: duchess of delights ]

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♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party

Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged
JohnBoot
BOOTED
# 3566

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quote:
Originally posted by chive:
For the second time in this thread, I am a woman


Whoops! I duly apologize, Mademoiselle chives. I'll try to keep close watch in case you switch again.

Please don't feel that you have to remove any item of clothing for my sake.

Posts: 789 | From: Detroit | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged
RooK

1 of 6
# 1852

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quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:
I must thank the Messieurs chive, Rook and Stoo for their sharp-eyed corrections of my spelling and punctuation. You three hold me to a higher standard than anyone else on this thread - as you should - and I thank you!

Actually, it was neither your spelling or your punctuation that I was responding to. Rather, it was the utter moronic sidestep of saying "actually, I meant my friend Simon". That makes you either painfully disingenuous about pretending to mean Captain Simon instead of Siné, or remarkably fuck-witted for not realizing that this group would interpret "Simon" in a very specific manner.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged
Ultraspike

Incensemeister
# 268

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quote:
Originally posted by JohnBoot:
Did I mention that he has a very talented tongue?

Let me guess, you know this because he's been licking your boots? [Roll Eyes]

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A cowgirl's work is never done.

Posts: 2732 | From: NYC | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Sine Nomine*

Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631

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quote:
Originally posted by Twilight:
In time, I learned not to believe them and it has now been a long time since I started one.

Makes me wonder how long it took you to learn that fire is hot. I hope the scars aren't terribly disfiguring.
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged



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