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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Hell: Calling Erin to Hell
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
Oh look, Spawn has a crush on me. How cute, in that "my skin has just crawled off my body and is whimpering in the corner" kind of way.
What I don't get is why the dickhead Spawn stays in my playground. And it IS my playground, you knuckle-dragging mouth-breathing cretin, so if the fact that people like me drives you as incoherently batshit as your posts indicate -- after all, no one can say anything nice or complimentary to or about me without you frothing at the mouth like some kind of rabid skunk -- why don't you fuck off to your own bulletin board? Leave me and mine alone, you worthless son of a bitch. You contribute NOTHING to the Ship.
Now piss off, insect.
The usual proprietorial crap. It happens to be more fun playing in your playground, Erin. That's why I'm here and you'll be pleased to know I'm staying.
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Left at the Altar
Ship's Siren
# 5077
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Posted
And Spawn...
If you were suddenly to fall under a train and die a horrible, gruesome death, with your legs and arms mangled and not able to be put back together, we'd probably all miss you enormously. Or at least a bit. Or we'd at least wonder where that annoying little prick had gone to. Maybe. After a week or so. Or a month, maybe.
So I for one, am glad you are sticking around.
[ 02. April 2004, 07:58: Message edited by: Shagged at the Altar ]
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Still pretty Amazing, but no longer Mavis.
Posts: 9111 | Registered: Oct 2003
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Ah, it's all clear now - that's no squished tomato: it's a bright red rubber ball which keeps insisting on bouncing back, no matter how hard you throw it....
(But watch your back - is that Erin's jaws I see just behind you, waiting to take a huge bite ![[Eek!]](eek.gif) )
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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mr cheesy
Shipmate
# 3330
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Posted
Don't tell me, Spawn, you like it here because it gives you ideas for your pathetic little contribution for that excuse for a 'news'-paper.
But then maybe there'll be a 'How I got thrown off of the website of christian unrest' column in the near future.
I still can't yet over the fact that scz was on a CU executive and you were a member of an SCM group ![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif) Best joke I've heard in a long time.
C
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arse
Posts: 10697 | Registered: Sep 2002
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NO
Shipmate
# 5477
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Choristerrr:
Perhaps you should just pocket the £1 000 000 cheque and let Spawn have a board all of his own?
I wonder what it should be called? ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
The Monologue?
Posts: 1250 | Registered: Feb 2004
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
The usual proprietorial crap. It happens to be more fun playing in your playground, Erin. That's why I'm here and you'll be pleased to know I'm staying.
It's more fun playing in my playground because it's MY playground, dumbass, although you are either too stupid or too stuck up your own ass to figure that one out. I'm going with the former, considering that I'd lay money on the fact that you couldn't count your balls and get the same number twice.
At any rate, eat shit and die, asshole.
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Wood
The Milkman of Human Kindness
# 7
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Cheesy*:
Don't tell me, Spawn, you like it here because it gives you ideas for your pathetic little contribution for that excuse for a 'news'-paper.
Hey, be fair. It does have some redeeming features.
Personally, I find its pages soft and absorbent.
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Narcissism.
Posts: 7842 | From: Wood Towers | Registered: Apr 2001
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
There are plenty of rebels on the Ship.
I wish to publicly go on record as to having once disagreed violently with Madam Etheredge about the correct way of preparing Garlic Cheese Grits. She was wrong about it then and she's wrong about it now.
And I stand by that.
--Rebel Nomine
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
It's more fun playing in my playground because it's MY playground, dumbass, although you are either too stupid or too stuck up your own ass to figure that one out. I'm going with the former, considering that I'd lay money on the fact that you couldn't count your balls and get the same number twice.
At any rate, eat shit and die, asshole.
You've made an excellent playground. I just don't go in for public displays of mutual arse-licking. But do what you want, I'll just vomit on the swings.
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Cheesy*:
Don't tell me, Spawn, you like it here because it gives you ideas for your pathetic little contribution for that excuse for a 'news'-paper.
But then maybe there'll be a 'How I got thrown off of the website of christian unrest' column in the near future.
I still can't yet over the fact that scz was on a CU executive and you were a member of an SCM group Best joke I've heard in a long time.
C
I don't think I'll be thrown out of here unless I break the rules. I can't see any commandments against baiting Erin and Norman.
Who's SCZ?
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
Anyone who throws his cigarette butts out his car window hardly has the moral high ground here.
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Simply 'Normous:
Anyone who throws his cigarette butts out his car window hardly has the moral high ground here.
So you're with me on this one, Sine?
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
You've made an excellent playground. I just don't go in for public displays of mutual arse-licking. But do what you want, I'll just vomit on the swings.
My God, you are right, any display of positive sentiment IS "mutual arse-licking". I mean, really, it's not possible that when we say nice things to each other or joke that we could possibly mean it.
Tell me, Spawn, what IS your childhood trauma?
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Wood
The Milkman of Human Kindness
# 7
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
Tell me, Spawn, what IS your childhood trauma?
Pssst! Erin!
His dad was an Archbishop. What more explantion do you need?
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Narcissism.
Posts: 7842 | From: Wood Towers | Registered: Apr 2001
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Wood:
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
Tell me, Spawn, what IS your childhood trauma?
Pssst! Erin!
His dad was an Archbishop. What more explantion do you need?
That unfortunately was an adult trauma. Pyxe recently reminded me of my childhood one - I fell out of a tree and hit every branch on the way down.
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
You've made an excellent playground. I just don't go in for public displays of mutual arse-licking. But do what you want, I'll just vomit on the swings.
My God, you are right, any display of positive sentiment IS "mutual arse-licking". I mean, really, it's not possible that when we say nice things to each other or joke that we could possibly mean it.
Tell me, Spawn, what IS your childhood trauma?
'Positive sentiment' or 'arse-licking'? Which one is it when tongues are lapping at the backside of the playground bully? It must be 'positive sentiment'.
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
So you're with me on this one, Sine?
I'm not quite sure how you got that from my comment, but I am prepared to say that I value your point of view and your knowledge and think the Ship, for me, would be a poorer, duller place without it.
You have even on occasion almost changed my mind on some issues.
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
Look at little friendless Spawn, so desperate for attention that he has to throw a whiny temper tantrum in the middle of a thread which has nothing to do with him. He won't leave a website whose leader he doesn't like, whose ethos he mocks and whose broad sentiment he couldn't be at odds with more if he tried, because even the negative attention is better than the unacknowledged existence he would go back to leading.
It's sad, really. If he wasn't such a dick I would feel sorry for him.
Again: what is your childhood trauma that you hang around a place you don't like? Are you some kind of sick masochist freak?
[ 02. April 2004, 12:06: Message edited by: Erin ]
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Simply 'Normous:
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
So you're with me on this one, Sine?
I'm not quite sure how you got that from my comment, but I am prepared to say that I value your point of view and your knowledge and think the Ship, for me, would be a poorer, duller place without it.
You have even on occasion almost changed my mind on some issues.
You always do this to me, Sine. Get me all emotional and gushy in the middle of a playground fight. I'll go home blubbering in a moment. ![[Tear]](graemlins/tear.gif)
What I meant was my recollection that I wasn't the only one defending the practice of throwing cigarette butts out of car windows. But that may have been my faulty memory.
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
What I meant was my recollection that I wasn't the only one defending the practice of throwing cigarette butts out of car windows.
Correct. But you really don't want to be sharing the moral low ground with the likes of me, now do you?
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
s quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
Look at little friendless Spawn, so desperate for attention that he has to throw a whiny temper tantrum in the middle of a thread which has nothing to do with him. He won't leave a website whose leader he doesn't like, whose ethos he mocks and whose broad sentiment he couldn't be at odds with more if he tried, because even the negative attention is better than the unacknowledged existence he would go back to leading.
It's sad, really. If he wasn't such a dick I would feel sorry for him.
Again: what is your childhood trauma that you hang around a place you don't like? Are you some kind of sick masochist freak?
You missed your vocation as a head shrink. But Erin, maybe you hadn't realised that not everyone needs Ship-of-Fools in place of a life. I like purgatory and hell and that's pretty much it.
Strangely enough, you may not believe this, but I have made some friends on SOF (to make up for my sad lonely realtime life). Trouble is I can't prove it - they begged me not to divulge their identities.
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
Again, I ask: what is your childhood trauma that has resulted in you needing to voluntarily infest a website whose leader you do not like, whose membership you hold in contempt and whose ethos you mock?
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
Again, I ask: what is your childhood trauma that has resulted in you needing to voluntarily infest a website whose leader you do not like, whose membership you hold in contempt and whose ethos you mock?
I've already said I like SOF but you're drawing too many conclusions to say I don't like you or the membership - I don't even know you.
As for that childhood trauma, well it's still too upsetting to talk about...
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Matrix
Shipmate
# 3452
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
I fell out of a tree and hit every branch on the way down.
That might explain what you'd argue with Wood, now what about the croc?
M
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Maybe that's all a family really is; a group of people who miss the same imaginary place. - Garden State
Posts: 3847 | From: The courts of the King | Registered: Oct 2002
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Alan Cresswell
Mad Scientist 先生
# 31
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Posted
"croc"???? now that's what I call living dangerously
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Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.
Posts: 32413 | From: East Kilbride (Scotland) or 福島 | Registered: May 2001
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Amazing Grace*
Shipmate
# 4754
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
You missed your vocation as a head shrink. But Erin, maybe you hadn't realised that not everyone needs Ship-of-Fools in place of a life. I like purgatory and hell and that's pretty much it.
Well, except for your inexplicable love jones for Erin. And you a married man, no? ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
You might want to talk to someone about that.
Charlotte
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.sig on vacation
Posts: 2594 | From: Sittin' by the dock of the [SF] bay | Registered: Jul 2003
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Matrix
Shipmate
# 3452
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Posted
I'm a fast runner Alan...
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Maybe that's all a family really is; a group of people who miss the same imaginary place. - Garden State
Posts: 3847 | From: The courts of the King | Registered: Oct 2002
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Alan Cresswell
Mad Scientist 先生
# 31
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Posted
Can you manage 35 mph ?
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Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.
Posts: 32413 | From: East Kilbride (Scotland) or 福島 | Registered: May 2001
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Matrix
Shipmate
# 3452
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Posted
quote:
from the site Alan links to quote:
"Stay safe and watch from a distance"
Where's the fun in that?
M
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Maybe that's all a family really is; a group of people who miss the same imaginary place. - Garden State
Posts: 3847 | From: The courts of the King | Registered: Oct 2002
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Twilight
Puddleglum's sister
# 2832
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Posted
"Sentiment?" Where's Jennifer with her usual screaching fit over someone being nice in Hell?
Norman really does win the Suck-up Hall of Fame award doesn't he? Some of his very first posts admitted that he didn't know the target person at all but the in-crowd didn't seem to like him so "here's my copy and paste flame!"
Of course there is tremendous competition in this area. Papio comes to mind as well as Shuggie and there are dozen's of timid but eagar to please shipmates who never weigh in until they see how the wind is blowing and then just to echo what's already been said.
Still, they have other awards to win. There's the Ten Thousand Lame One Liners award (sometimes called the Beavis and Butthead award) currently held by Mousethief, and Pants is well on her way to the new Ten Thousand Smilie Posts award although Chive might give her some competition since he finds almost every insult "hilarious" and in need of a laughing smilie.
But I digress. This thread is about Erin and I personally think that her new vision of herself as the lead bully on the playground is a step toward reality. A few weeks ago she seemed to be seeing herself as a Mafia hit man with threats of "consequences that wont be pleasant" or else Mayor of New York during a Sanitation Workers Strike: quote:
Your engagements with the management have never, not once, been anything but a nightmare for me to clean up.
And she wonders why we don't leave.
Throughout the internet, most message boards admins are so low profile you can post on their sites for years without hearing a word from them. Erin is so visible and so wonderfully entertaining. She has her illogical rants and her vague rules that she can apply with blatant discrimination. She has her Mini-Erin's like Sarkycow who feel free to forbid one person from talking about guitars in Hell (cuz that's off-topic) while allowing another to practice his new f*ckwit vocabulary word by using it in a sentence ten times to "make it his own."
I have my own picture of Erin.
There she sits and sweats, way down in Florida in her Air Stream trailer hooked up in a rental spot that overlooks the swamp. Lawn chair sagging under the strain as she chain smokes her way through another page of her very own site. What power, what bliss.
Posts: 6817 | Registered: May 2002
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
Oh, look, Sasha the clinically insane lunatic has crawled out from under her rock. My day is complete.
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
I've already said I like SOF but you're drawing too many conclusions to say I don't like you or the membership - I don't even know you.
And you, sir, are a goddamned liar. All you have to do is read your own words on this thread.
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Pyx_e
Quixotic Tilter
# 57
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Posted
Pyx_e stands bare-chested above the swamp, sunrise breaking orange and gold behind him. Cavalry hat tilted slightly downward and to the left looking straight in to camera he mutters;
"God I love the smell of burning nutters in the morning.
Dozens of Apache gun-ships chop overhead in perfect formation to the sound of the "Ride of the Valakeries"
What a weird fucking thread. Spawn you get to be Marlon Brando and Sasha you get to be Charlie Sheens Dad after he went mad too.
P
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It is better to be Kind than right.
Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001
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shuggie
Shipmate
# 3141
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Posted
<dons his flamed-by-sasha-for-no-particular-reason badge with pride>
Posts: 367 | Registered: Aug 2002
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Matrix
Shipmate
# 3452
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Posted
That weren't no flame shuggie, more of a slightly glowing ember.....
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Maybe that's all a family really is; a group of people who miss the same imaginary place. - Garden State
Posts: 3847 | From: The courts of the King | Registered: Oct 2002
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
And you, sir, are a goddamned liar. All you have to do is read your own words on this thread.
No Erin, I even like what I've seen of some of the people who have been posting on this thread. I sometimes quite like your posts. I think you play the part of playground bully with consummate professionalism and I dislike that, but I don't confuse that with who you really are. This Ship is not the whole of reality.
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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shuggie
Shipmate
# 3141
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Matrix.:
That weren't no flame shuggie, more of a slightly glowing ember.....
Yeah but embered by sasha doesn't quite sound...
...actually sounds like some intriguing sex game. Your place or mine Sash? ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
Posts: 367 | Registered: Aug 2002
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Nightlamp
Shipmate
# 266
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Posted
This must be the most successful April Fool I have seen on the ship and I am so glad I didn't close it when I first saw it.
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I don't know what you are talking about so it couldn't have been that important- Nightlamp
Posts: 8442 | From: Midlands | Registered: May 2001
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Erin
Meaner than Godzilla
# 2
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Posted
Spawn, you are such a fucking liar. If you really meant that, you'd have kept your goddamned trap shut and not turned a fun thread into your own personal vendetta. What makes it doubly worse is that you lured that crazy bitch Sasha out of her straitjacket.
Fuck off and die. Both of you.
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Commandment number one: shut the hell up.
Posts: 17140 | From: 330 miles north of paradise | Registered: Mar 2001
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Spawn
Shipmate
# 4867
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
Spawn, you are such a fucking liar. If you really meant that, you'd have kept your goddamned trap shut and not turned a fun thread into your own personal vendetta. What makes it doubly worse is that you lured that crazy bitch Sasha out of her straitjacket.
Fuck off and die. Both of you.
Let me remind you Erin, this is Hell (yes you don't need to tell me that you invented the concept). I thought that fun threads went elsewhere. Now you're complaining that I'm using Hell for precisely the purpose that it's meant.
Posts: 3447 | From: North Devon | Registered: Aug 2003
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Twilight
Puddleglum's sister
# 2832
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Posted
[Sasha carefully raises her stake with Pyx_e's head on top (complete with fake arrow running through) and fixes it in the sand.]
[Shuggie, sometimes awards are given for specific performances and sometimes, like now, it's for "body of work."]
Posts: 6817 | Registered: May 2002
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Sine Nomine*
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631
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Posted
Alan, that link has proved to be a treasure trove of useful information.
quote:
Alligators were here long before us and have proven remarkably adaptable. Many conflicts between alligators and people are perhaps perceived rather than real. Good judgement can reduce serious incidents to a minimum.
...of course you've got to have good judgement to start with.
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Alan Cresswell
Mad Scientist 先生
# 31
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Matrix.:
quote:
from the site Alan links to quote:
"Stay safe and watch from a distance"
Where's the fun in that?
Oh, I don't know. This thread for example ...
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Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.
Posts: 32413 | From: East Kilbride (Scotland) or 福島 | Registered: May 2001
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Pānts*
Ship's underwear
# 4487
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Posted
Great thread Norman! Hee hee! Look what you started now. Erin with all her favourite people! ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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I'm not here any more. Dial 999 to get me. (No. Please don't really. Bit you could PM me on my new number cos I never get PMs!)
Posts: 8380 | From: The Stables | Registered: May 2003
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chive
Ship's nude
# 208
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Posted
This is fun. Thanks Sasha - you're inclusion of me in your mini tantrum has made me feel so much part of this community.
I'm a girl but don't let that stand in the way of a good bitch.
<Wondering which smilie she should use to make the post as inane as all her others>
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'Edward was the kind of man who thought there was no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who hadn't done one-to-one Bible study with him.' Catherine Fox, Love to the Lost
Posts: 3542 | From: the cupboard under the stairs | Registered: May 2001
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shuggie
Shipmate
# 3141
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Posted
Nice to be appreciated for my body for once.
Chive - we all assumed you were a he - cos you like women and this is a Christian website.
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
(Gratuituous smilie implying sarcasm for the hard of thinking among you. Hi LFD!)
Posts: 367 | Registered: Aug 2002
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Ley Druid
Ship's chemist
# 3246
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Spawn:
quote:
Originally posted by Erin:
Look at little friendless Spawn, so desperate for attention that he has to throw a whiny temper tantrum in the middle of a thread which has nothing to do with him. He won't leave a website whose leader he doesn't like, whose ethos he mocks and whose broad sentiment he couldn't be at odds with more if he tried, because even the negative attention is better than the unacknowledged existence he would go back to leading.
I've already said I like SOF but you're drawing too many conclusions to say I don't like you or the membership - I don't even know you.
Maybe she's projecting her own feelings on to you Spawn.
Dear Leader,
In what manner shall you lead us today? If you tell us to leave, shall we not stay? If you command, shall we not disobey? If you demand it one way, shall we not do it another? If you say "no", shall we not say "yes"? If you insult us, shall we not laugh?
Thine is the leadership, the bulletin board, and the website. Forever and ever. Amen.
Posts: 1188 | Registered: Aug 2002
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Pyx_e
Quixotic Tilter
# 57
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Posted
Have we ever had a "shit magnet" thread before?
P
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It is better to be Kind than right.
Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001
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Twilight
Puddleglum's sister
# 2832
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Posted
Sorry Chive, I thought you were a guy because it's usually just teenage boys who fall out of their chairs laughing when they encounter "bad words" on the net.
Now, Ley Druid's post ? That was funny.
Posts: 6817 | Registered: May 2002
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sasha:
Sasha carefully raises her stake with Pyx_e's head on top (complete with fake arrow running through) and fixes it in the sand.
Get a clue, Twilight. You aren't fit to manage a vigorous buffing of Pyx_e's toenails, much less put his head on a stake. You couldn't ninny-flail a fluffy bunny hard enough to convince it to stop wiping its ass with you. The only things you are a threat to are glasses, with your high-pitched whining.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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Twilight
Puddleglum's sister
# 2832
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Posted
Uh Rook, most of us are laughing, if you can only hear whining then you should probably stop reading out loud, through your nose.
If Pyx_e can be Robert Duvall and Sine can believe Erin's a real alligator then I can be Charlie. Play right, Rooksie.
Posts: 6817 | Registered: May 2002
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