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Source: (consider it) Thread: Hell: 'Support' threads
*The lowly Church mouse*

Ship's Animal & Nature Lover
# 4690

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Are support threads really for the giving and receiving of support or just the opportunity for small groups of people to form cliques?
There are a few at the moment where every Tom, Dick & Harry jumps in with an 'I've been there', 'I've done that' when, in fact, they have not the experience to offer any valuable support.
Mutual back slapping is not support, it is a way of saying 'I'm better than you' and showing off.

[ 29. April 2005, 22:08: Message edited by: Sarkycow ]

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Surrounded by water, swans, ducks, birds & animals.

Posts: 1333 | From: Surrey | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
RooK

1 of 6
# 1852

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I know exactly what you mean. *

* TRANSLATION: I am better than you, and I'm showing off.

Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged
Pyx_e

Quixotic Tilter
# 57

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They all ignoring you again Angel?

P

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It is better to be Kind than right.

Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Anselmina
Ship's barmaid
# 3032

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You're so right, Angel. Like I was once on this support thread and everyone was so 'oh yeah, like I've really been through it,' and 'hey, you know, I so know what you mean'. And I thought 'hang on! this is, like, so not true. How can you know anything about how it really was?!'

And, you know, it was just so false! And I really, really think, Angel, you should get a little group together and have a thread all of your own where people can be really sincere, like, and not at all congratulatory or superior - just full of really, really valuable and relevant experience that proves they have a right to post.

You should do that. No, you should, really. Please allow me to offer you my support.... [Two face]

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Irish dogs needing homes! http://www.dogactionwelfaregroup.ie/ Greyhounds and Lurchers are shipped over to England for rehoming too!

Posts: 10002 | From: Scotland the Brave | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
*The lowly Church mouse*

Ship's Animal & Nature Lover
# 4690

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Thank you Anselmina! [Overused]

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Surrounded by water, swans, ducks, birds & animals.

Posts: 1333 | From: Surrey | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Anselmina
Ship's barmaid
# 3032

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
Thank you Anselmina! [Overused]

I was being tongue in cheek, you know? So I'm not sure this is a good thing. [Confused]

Nevertheless, I'll take my notworthies wherever I can get' em [Big Grin] !

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Irish dogs needing homes! http://www.dogactionwelfaregroup.ie/ Greyhounds and Lurchers are shipped over to England for rehoming too!

Posts: 10002 | From: Scotland the Brave | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
Lyda*Rose

Ship's broken porthole
# 4544

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Well, if you are feeling left out 'cause you are not pregnant, depressed, have "special" children, have a chronic disease, haven't just broken up, haven't fertility problems, or aren't taking care of elderly relatives, get a life- as in one in "interesting times". That's how all those lucky posters got to belong. [Roll Eyes]

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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

Posts: 21377 | From: CA | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged
*The lowly Church mouse*

Ship's Animal & Nature Lover
# 4690

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On the contrary, I am not feeling left out at all. I am just sick of seeing so many threads dedicated to, so called, support when they are in fact only a stage for showing off your achievements.

I have sympathy for people going through a hard time, whatever the reason, but, to have these clubs formed out of people wanting to display their various aspirations, trying to prove they are intellectually superior to the majority of posters is unacceptable. [Mad] Go jump!

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Surrounded by water, swans, ducks, birds & animals.

Posts: 1333 | From: Surrey | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Craigmaddie
c/o The Pickwick Club
# 8367

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I'm a fairly regular contributor to at least one of the support threads in All Saints and haven't noticed much "mutual back-slapping" there. What I have noticed is people sharing their feelings and experiences with other people who are in the same or similar situations, thereby gaining often very useful advice and, perhaps more importantly, a sense that they are not alone in their problems. I see that as a very positive thing.

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Via Veritas Vita

Posts: 1093 | From: Scotchland, Europeshire | Registered: Aug 2004  |  IP: Logged
*The lowly Church mouse*

Ship's Animal & Nature Lover
# 4690

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Perhaps you are one of the IN crowd then - good luck to you!

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Surrounded by water, swans, ducks, birds & animals.

Posts: 1333 | From: Surrey | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Caz...
Shipmate
# 3026

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
On the contrary, I am not feeling left out at all. I am just sick of seeing so many threads dedicated to, so called, support when they are in fact only a stage for showing off your achievements.

Care to name some? The only one I can think of is the thesis support one; unless you see going through the breakdown of a marriage, suffering from depression or suffering miscarriages and enduring intrusive medical intervention as achievements.

You're talking bullshit.

[ 14. March 2005, 20:37: Message edited by: Caz... ]

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"What have you been reading? The Gospel according to St. Bastard?" - Eddie Izzard

Posts: 1888 | From: here to there | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
Pax Romana
Shipmate
# 4653

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I agree. I also occasionally contribute to "support" threads, or at least read them. I don't think anyone is trying to feel superior in these cases. What I do see are people sharing experiences and trying to be of help.

And we always have the option not to read and/or contribute to a thread that doesn't interest us or for which we do not have anything useful to contribute.

And I get ignored a lot, too, and it's no big deal at all. There are a lot more important things to get excited about.

Pax Romana

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********************
I used to wake up at 4 A.M. and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness.
James Thurber

Posts: 4598 | From: New York City | Registered: Jun 2003  |  IP: Logged
*The lowly Church mouse*

Ship's Animal & Nature Lover
# 4690

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OK then, take the thesis support thread, if you must Caz....

Is everyone treated similarly and given support? - I don't think so!

Do all people posting on it receive the same warm welcome? - I don't think so!

Is it a private club that only the chosen few / 'in-crowd' may join? - Yes I think so!

edited to add Caz.. name


[Devil]

[ 14. March 2005, 20:41: Message edited by: Angel* ]

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Surrounded by water, swans, ducks, birds & animals.

Posts: 1333 | From: Surrey | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713

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You don't have to read them Angel*.

Would you like a "Help I'm drawn to threads I have nothing to do with" thread? I'm sure someone could start one for you; or they would if they weren't afraid of you biting their head off.

--

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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"

(Paul Sinha, BBC)

Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004  |  IP: Logged
Craigmaddie
c/o The Pickwick Club
# 8367

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
Perhaps you are one of the IN crowd then - good luck to you!

What - do you really think people want to be having to deal with depression, relationship difficulties, or infertility problems?

Personally, I don't think you have much of a case here and are just looking to piss people off - for whatever reasons you may have.

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Via Veritas Vita

Posts: 1093 | From: Scotchland, Europeshire | Registered: Aug 2004  |  IP: Logged
Caz...
Shipmate
# 3026

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
OK then, take the thesis support thread, if you must Caz....

Is everyone treated similarly and given support? - I don't think so!

Do all people posting on it receive the same warm welcome? - I don't think so!

Is it a private club that only the chosen few / 'in-crowd' may join? - Yes I think so!

I don't have a clue. I've never posted there as I'm not doing, have never done and am never likely to do a thesis. I wouldn't have a clue what to say! So I've never even been into it.

Is that it then, are you doing a thesis that no-one seemed that interested in? Cos otherwise I still don't get it.

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"What have you been reading? The Gospel according to St. Bastard?" - Eddie Izzard

Posts: 1888 | From: here to there | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
Craigmaddie
c/o The Pickwick Club
# 8367

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
OK then, take the thesis support thread, if you must Caz....

Is everyone treated similarly and given support? - I don't think so!

So - just to clarify - are you just referring to the Thesis Support thread? I've had a look at your Recent Posts and can't see anything that you've posted to that particular thread - certainly not within the last two years at least.

Are you taking up cudgels for other shipmates here? If so, it would help if you could be more specific about the instances where you feel they weren't made to feel welcome...

[learn to spell, Craigmaddie...]

[ 14. March 2005, 20:53: Message edited by: Craigmaddie ]

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Via Veritas Vita

Posts: 1093 | From: Scotchland, Europeshire | Registered: Aug 2004  |  IP: Logged
*The lowly Church mouse*

Ship's Animal & Nature Lover
# 4690

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Point made then!

Show is over, bring on the popcorn please.

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Surrounded by water, swans, ducks, birds & animals.

Posts: 1333 | From: Surrey | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Jack the Lass

Ship's airhead
# 3415

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
OK then, take the thesis support thread, if you must Caz....

Is everyone treated similarly and given support? - I don't think so!

Do all people posting on it receive the same warm welcome? - I don't think so!

Is it a private club that only the chosen few / 'in-crowd' may join? - Yes I think so!

edited to add Caz.. name


[Devil]

OK, as the most recent person to mention something I'm actually proud of on the Thesis thread (as opposed to a tale of unmitigated woe), permit me to take this personally.

You're talking bollocks. I'm sorry if people feel unsupported on the thread, I joined it to get help and advice in my application which I have found, and now people seem interested enough for me to want to tell them when I'm reaping the benefits of the support/advice/kicks up the backside they have given me. I certainly have no intention of being part of an in-crowd, I've not got much stomach for gushing praise, and I just use the thread as much or as little as I feel I need to. As postgrad study is something that is important to me at the moment it's a thread I often use as an extension to the prayer thread to pray for others having a tough time with their studies as that's something I can really relate to. I'm so terribly sorry that me not posting a votive or a yippee every 5 minutes gives the impression of lack of support or care.

And what the hell happened to not reading a thread you're not interested in? You should try it sometime.

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"My body is a temple - it's big and doesn't move." (Jo Brand)
wiblog blipfoto blog

Posts: 5767 | From: the land of the deep-fried Mars Bar | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Nicolemr
Shipmate
# 28

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ok, i am puzzled. checking angels recent posts shows that prior to this thread she last posted on the pets thread i started, back in febuary. which believe me, if she wants to post on again i'd be overjoyed to see reserected, and will be overjoyed to respond to her on.

prior to that however, she doesn't seem to have posted since may 2004. and not on any support type threads at all that i can see.

so, angel, why don't you try actually posting on a support thread and see if people respond to you?

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On pilgrimage in the endless realms of Cyberia, currently traveling by ship. Now with live journal!

Posts: 11803 | From: New York City "The City Carries On" | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Craigmaddie
c/o The Pickwick Club
# 8367

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
Point made then!

Glad you've got it the point as I certainly haven't...

quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
Show is over, bring on the popcorn please.

Grow up.

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Via Veritas Vita

Posts: 1093 | From: Scotchland, Europeshire | Registered: Aug 2004  |  IP: Logged
Chocoholic
Shipmate
# 4655

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quote:
Originally posted by Craigmaddie:
Grow up.

She's older than you. Trust me on this. [Big Grin]
Posts: 773 | From: London | Registered: Jun 2003  |  IP: Logged
Vikki Pollard
Shipmate
# 5548

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Oooh, this is the nearest I've ever been to saying, "Fuck off", in Hell!

Oh...

What an anti-climax.

You are welcome on the Support Thread for those who are going through separation and divorce any time, if that's what would help. Some people who aren't going through that right now even post to encourage those who are. (You know who you are - thanks).

Likewise, if you happen to have an infertile teenage daughter, I'm sure you will receive the same level of support as I have.

If however you have been slightly less than proactive in your posting and feel put-out because nobody's paying attention, then why not do as some have suggested already and start your own thread?

Seriously, the level of compassion and empathy on here is wonderful. Personally I find it helps to keep off the threads which aren't relevant to me, but then I only get 150 hours Internet access a month.

There is no need to feel left out on here. There is even less need to whinge about it. I believe you were possibly trying to close the subject a few posts ago. Unfortunately I think people here are still waiting for specifics as you obviously have something in mind. Come on. you've got this far - get it off your chest. We're all here for you...
[Roll Eyes]

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"I don't get all this fuss about global warming, Miss. Why doesn't the Government just knock down all the f**king greenhouses?" (One of my slightly less bright 15 year old pupils)

Posts: 5695 | From: The Far Side | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Spiffy
Ship's WonderSheep
# 5267

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I can't believe I wasted all my time reading this sorry excuse for a thread when I should have been working on my thesis.

Oh, wait, no, I've finished my thesis! Neener neener neener! [Razz]

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Looking for a simple solution to all life's problems? We are proud to present obstinate denial. Accept no substitute. Accept nothing.
--Night Vale Radio Twitter Account

Posts: 10281 | From: Beervana | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Vikki Pollard
Shipmate
# 5548

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Aw well done Spiffy.

How are you FEELING about that?

Well done! [Big Grin]

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"I don't get all this fuss about global warming, Miss. Why doesn't the Government just knock down all the f**king greenhouses?" (One of my slightly less bright 15 year old pupils)

Posts: 5695 | From: The Far Side | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Spiffy
Ship's WonderSheep
# 5267

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I'm feeling rather anticlimatic...

it was done in January. [Devil]


Right now I'm just worrying about how to fix a pair of pants I just tore. Has anyone ever had a similar experience? I just need someone to empathize with me...

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Looking for a simple solution to all life's problems? We are proud to present obstinate denial. Accept no substitute. Accept nothing.
--Night Vale Radio Twitter Account

Posts: 10281 | From: Beervana | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Gremlin
Ship's Cryptanalyst
# 129

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
OK then, take the thesis support thread, if you must Caz....

Is everyone treated similarly and given support? - I don't think so!

Okay, as a semi-regular contributor to the Thesis Support thread I think I'll have my shot.

The thread is about asking for advice/support/information regarding how to start/keep going/finish a doctoral, masters or degree thesis (or any other major piece of solo research work). Do those of us who already have their <insert particular qualification> go there to post "I've got mine, so up yours!" ?

No.

When I go there, it is my intention, if I can, to offer advice (if you're seriously ill for 6 months during your thesis, you could try asking for a pause in your funding*), offer guidance (when presenting to a large crowd, stick to three (relatively) simple points**), or encouragement (it's hard to finish, but it is worth it!***) all based upon my experience of being there and doing it.

I am sorry if this comes across as self-satisfaction, and if (when was the last time you asked for support on the thread in question, btw?****) you don't get a 'Yay!' for turning up to an occasional meeting with your supervisor. (For some people, this can be an issue, for which, to the best of my memory, they are quite likely to be given quite a lot of support in the thread at issue)

Gremlin

* I was ill for six months in the middle of my PhD research, and got just such a pause
** I hated (still do) speaking to crowds, I always stick to K.I.S.S. now - if they want the sticky details, they can read the paper.
*** I've done it, I know it's worth it.

**** I've just checked the Search engine, and there's no record of you ever posting on the Thesis Support thread. In fact, the only post of yours in All Saints at all is this one (last February!!) in the Wedding dates 2004 thread! So SHUT THE FUCK UP!

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Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...
Oh I get it... like humour... but different.

Posts: 5221 | From: Isle of Man | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
FutureFr
Shipmate
# 9145

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quote:
Originally posted by Spiffy da Wonder Sheep:

Right now I'm just worrying about how to fix a pair of pants I just tore. Has anyone ever had a similar experience? I just need someone to empathize with me...

Oh man, totally. I work at a hospital and bending down my big ass ripped the lower portion of my pants. I tried to repair them by putting one of those neat-o iron on patches but to no avail, my pants weren't having it. I had to throw them away. Tragic!
Posts: 56 | From: Marion, Indiana | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged
Sine Nomine*

Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631

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You might want to check out the weight loss thread in All Saints.
Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged
Lyda*Rose

Ship's broken porthole
# 4544

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I'm beginning to think Angel* just wanted to post a thread in Hell to see who would show up.

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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

Posts: 21377 | From: CA | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged
Og: Thread Killer
Ship's token CN Mennonite
# 3200

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What, her own support thread in hell?

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I wish I was seeking justice loving mercy and walking humbly but... "Cease to lament for that thou canst not help, And study help for that which thou lament'st."

Posts: 5025 | From: Toronto | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged
PataLeBon
Shipmate
# 5452

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quote:
Originally posted by Spiffy da Wonder Sheep:
Right now I'm just worrying about how to fix a pair of pants I just tore. Has anyone ever had a similar experience? I just need someone to empathize with me...

Ew..I've done that. My only suggestion is to by a new pair. And stay way from cheap pairs of pants, IMHO.

As far a support threads go, if you don't like them, don't read them.

I don't [Biased] Well unless there's one about how to deal with paint, glue, and marker on clothes *sigh*

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That's between you and your god. Oh, wait a minute. You are your god. That's a problem. - Jack O'Neill (Stargate SG1)

Posts: 1907 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2004  |  IP: Logged
Spiffy
Ship's WonderSheep
# 5267

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quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
You might want to check out the weight loss thread in All Saints.

*sobs* I think I need to create a "I've been sideswiped by a Sine-liner" thread.

And I tore 'em when a little dear, darling, loving, I'm going to kill 'em student stepped on the cuff. They're repaired now, but I pricked my finger with the needle. Where's my damn support thread?

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Looking for a simple solution to all life's problems? We are proud to present obstinate denial. Accept no substitute. Accept nothing.
--Night Vale Radio Twitter Account

Posts: 10281 | From: Beervana | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Mamacita

Lakefront liberal
# 3659

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
I have sympathy for people going through a hard time

Apparently not.

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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.

Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged
Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468

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Spif, dear, use duct tape on the pants, and stitch up your finger with support thread! [Biased]

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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
*The lowly Church mouse*

Ship's Animal & Nature Lover
# 4690

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Marmacita posted:
quote:
quote:Originally posted by Angel*:
I have sympathy for people going through a hard time

Apparently not.

If you knew me at all you would know that I am a very soft and sympathetic person, I take to heart peoples troubles and do my very best to help whenever I can - so that post is unacceptable.

I know of one person who has posted helpful and supportive things on the thesis thread but received no acknowledgement whatsoever. As though the person does not even exist - that is what I am referring to. This smacks of an 'In Crowd' to me.

That's it. I have made a few of you think. Gremlin does make helpful contributions to the thread but is wrong in his statement:

quote:
**** I've just checked the Search engine, and there's no record of you ever posting on the Thesis Support thread. In fact, the only post of yours in All Saints at all is this one (last February!!) in the Wedding dates 2004 thread! So SHUT THE FUCK UP!

I have very often in the past posted on the prayer thread in All Saints but have not been active on the boards in the last few months due to pressures of my own.

Gremlin, please check again on the search feature, you will find that the vast majority of my posts are actually in a supporting role and many in All Saints.

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Surrounded by water, swans, ducks, birds & animals.

Posts: 1333 | From: Surrey | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
QLib

Bad Example
# 43

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quote:
Originally posted by St. Seraphim of Sarov: unless there's one about how to deal with paint, glue, and marker on clothes *sigh*
Yeah - it's this, be careful with paint, glue, indelible marker pens and other stuff - like tomatoes - that mark clothes. 'Cos washing out stuff like that can be quite wearing and you have to dry them too and sometimes the marks don't come out and then your clothes are spoilt. So you take care now *mwah* *mwah*

(P.S. Am I in yet? [Ultra confused] )

[ 15. March 2005, 07:59: Message edited by: Qlib ]

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Tradition is the handing down of the flame, not the worship of the ashes Gustav Mahler.

Posts: 8913 | From: Page 28 | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Pânts*

Ship's underwear
# 4487

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quote:
Originally posted by nicolemrw:
ok, i am puzzled. checking angels recent posts shows that prior to this thread she last posted on the pets thread i started, back in febuary. which believe me, if she wants to post on again i'd be overjoyed to see reserected, and will be overjoyed to respond to her on.

prior to that however, she doesn't seem to have posted since may 2004. and not on any support type threads at all that i can see.

so, angel, why don't you try actually posting on a support thread and see if people respond to you?

Maybe she reads and observes. Maybe she doesn't want to post on them cos she mightn't have 'experience' of whatever it is. But she is still allowed to read, observe, and come to informed conclusion isn't she?

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I'm not here any more. Dial 999 to get me. (No. Please don't really. Bit you could PM me on my new number cos I never get PMs!)

Posts: 8380 | From: The Stables | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged
Vikki Pollard
Shipmate
# 5548

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Absolutely.

In fact there are cliques on here, as in any community. I take it for granted that a certain type of support thread ('Geez Mate I've run out of Suncream Factor 85' might be one) will attract a small clientele who will of necessity form a rather impenetrable group.

I have seen threads where people's comments have been 'ignored' - it's happened to me too. But I see that as more like a coment getting lost in a large group conversation. You don't always get time to do more than skim read. Or you might be like me, read through and forget 3 of the 5 posts you felt like responding to. I always assume it isn't a deliberate act of ignoring. Of course, I may be wrong [Ultra confused] .

Sometimes if I think that's happened on a thread, I post, picking up the dropped idea to give it another run for its money. That's an option open to everyone on here. Just be prepared for it not to be taken up a second time!

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"I don't get all this fuss about global warming, Miss. Why doesn't the Government just knock down all the f**king greenhouses?" (One of my slightly less bright 15 year old pupils)

Posts: 5695 | From: The Far Side | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Pyx_e

Quixotic Tilter
# 57

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I don’t mine being ignored. It’s when some fucker says exactly the same as I did 10 posts later and all his/her bumchums go “Ohhhh you are so wise and funny, when I grow up I want to be like you ….. ( sfx asskissing ).”

Shitheads.

P

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It is better to be Kind than right.

Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Janine

The Endless Simmer
# 3337

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But... but... Pyx_e, can't I be just like you when I grow up? Would you hate that so very very much? [Frown]

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I'm a Fundagelical Evangimentalist. What are you?
Take Me Home * My Heart * An hour with Rich Mullins *

Posts: 13788 | From: Below the Bible Belt | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
Sine Nomine*

Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 3631

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
If you knew me at all you would know that I am a very soft and sympathetic person, I take to heart peoples troubles and do my very best to help whenever I can - so that post is unacceptable.

Not really.

Apparently there is a discrepancy between the real life you and your ship persona that you might want to think about addressing if this bothers you.

We can only go by the words you type, which certainly in this instance come across as sour and judgmental.

Posts: 10696 | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged
daronmedway
Shipmate
# 3012

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In support of the spirit (but not necessarily the content, tone, or style) of Angel's OP; here is what C.S. Lewis has to say about the 'inner ring'.

Angel, perhaps the article will help you understand exactly why you're so cheesed off. And, Angel's detractors, perhaps it will help you to understand why your're so cheesed off with Angel being cheesed about not being in the 'inner ring' of which you also would secretly like to be part. [Two face]

Posts: 6976 | From: Southampton | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
Firenze

Ordinary decent pagan
# 619

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
I know of one person who has posted helpful and supportive things on the thesis thread but received no acknowledgement whatsoever. As though the person does not even exist - that is what I am referring to. This smacks of an 'In Crowd' to me.

Really? I don't necessarily expect a response to a post, unless I made a specific request. It's enough that I've made a comment, and other people have read it. (Or not, of course: I've been known to skim threads myself.)

It would never occur to me that non-response constituted negation of my existence, or indicated that I was being purposefully excluded - any more than the fact that I don't respond to 99% of the posts I read means that I am dissing those posters. I enjoy many posts without feeling I have to applaud, I agree with many without needing to add anything, many I read as I would the paper - for a point of view which is interesting, but not necessarily of moment - and so on. And I suppose that everyone else is the same.

Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Flausa

Mad Woman
# 3466

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
I know of one person who has posted helpful and supportive things on the thesis thread but received no acknowledgement whatsoever. As though the person does not even exist - that is what I am referring to. This smacks of an 'In Crowd' to me.

Sounds to me like you have your own 'In Crowd' Angel. You have obviously taken offense on behalf of someone which means that you and someone have been talking privately about that offense. How more 'In' can you get?

If you were really truly supportive and nurturing, you'd encourage said individual to post their offense rather than letting them whinge to you and not act.

Alternatively, you may be taking up an offense on behalf of someone who really wasn't really offended. In which case, you need to sod off and get a life.

Posts: 4610 | From: bonny Scotland | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Amorya

Ship's tame galoot
# 2652

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quote:
Originally posted by Angel*:
I have sympathy for people going through a hard time, whatever the reason, but, to have these clubs formed out of people wanting to display their various aspirations, trying to prove they are intellectually superior to the majority of posters is unacceptable. [Mad] Go jump!

So going through a hard time is now congruent to intellectual superiority? Why did no-one tell me?

When I were a lad, we didn't have any of these new-fangled support groups. If we had problems, we were hit sixteen times by an ogre with a giant whip, and we all said thankyou afterwards. An' y'know why? 'Cos we were lucky!


Amorya

Posts: 2383 | From: Coventry | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged
mousethief

Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953

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All this reminds me of a certain poster we used to have -- always moaning about the "in crowd" and taking offence when somebody's post wasn't answered. Hmmm.

Angel, if you're really worried about there being an in-crowd which keeps other people out then you really do need something. I'm not sure what that something would be: a good swift kick in the rear, or intensive counseling, or perhaps a pitcher of Mousethief Coolers? And clearly poor m.t.tomb feels left out too, quoting CS Lewis at us to help us mend our evil ways. Did the sadsack internationale just let out, and you missed your bus home?

When one appears to be left out of the inner ring, it could be because people are whispering behind your back, intent on making you feel like an outsider. Or it could just be because you're a jackass (or jennyass) and people are reacting naturally to the personality you display. I know where my money is.

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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...

Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
Matrix
Shipmate
# 3452

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quote:
Originally posted by Mousethief:

When one appears to be left out of the inner ring, it could be because people are whispering behind your back, intent on making you feel like an outsider. Or it could just be because you're a jackass (or jennyass) and people are reacting naturally to the personality you display. I know where my money is.

Or it could be that the inner ring is a myth. Perpetuated by those who wish there was one so they could join.

M

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Maybe that's all a family really is; a group of people who miss the same imaginary place. - Garden State

Posts: 3847 | From: The courts of the King | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
mousethief

Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953

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quote:
Originally posted by Matrix:
Or it could be that the inner ring is a myth. Perpetuated by those who wish there was one so they could join.

Perpetuated by denial. Very slinky! Damn, we're clever.

This reminds me of Life of Brian: "Only the messiah denies his true identity!"

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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...

Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
Kelly Alves

Bunny with an axe
# 2522

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(Torrid confession)

I have to admit, at the risk of suffering rotten tomatoes in the puss, that I find the endless discussion of liturgical configurations abit tedious. So you know what that means? I stay the fuck out of Ecclesiantics.I am sure I am not missed.

If support threads give you a rash, stay the hell out of All Saints. Seems simple to me.

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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.

Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged



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