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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Heaven: Dear Sine...
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iGeek
Number of the Feast
# 777
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Gort:
watch their eyes in the course of casual conversation. The gay guy will look you in the eye and the nellie straight will be shifty and talk too much.
Though the gay guy may occasionally flick his glance downwards to check out, errm, other areas of interest.
You put it so elegantly, Sine (it *is* your thread after all), but I would have thought the presumption would be that a church organist is gay and that if he's going to come out, it would be as straight. IME, mind you.
Posts: 2150 | From: West End, Gulfopolis | Registered: Aug 2002
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lola:
I was brought up to never read at the table. How does this apply to dining alone in a restaurant whilst travelling on business? I have sometimes taken my newspaper or a book to dinner when eating in the anonymous hotel chains most business travel seems to involve.
quote:
A lady traveling alone with her maid (or without one), of necessity has her meals alone in her own sitting-room, if she has one. If she goes to the dining-room, she usually takes a book because hotel service seems endless to one used to meals at home and nothing is duller than to sit long alone with nothing to do but look at the tablecloth, which is scarcely diverting, or at other people, which is impolite.
Emily Post said it in 1922. It hasn't changed. Do however make sure you read a book, preferably Trollope, and not a newspaper.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Alfred E. Neuman
What? Me worry?
# 6855
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Posted
Dear Sine,
Recently, I was invited by an attractive widow to accompany her and a couple of her women friends to a cabin she owns on a mountain lake. She went out of her way to explain that she wasn't in the habit of inviting men for weekend outings, was a little embarrassed but enjoyed my conversation and thought that it would be fun to have me along to "liven up" her regular group of women friends. She made it clear that there was an extra bedroom for me and hoped that I didn't think her intentions were "untoward". I should add that I know her only as passing acquaintance. Being the bonehead I am, I was flattered and accepted without hesitation.
A couple of days later, I was walking by her condominium and she saw me. As it was nearly noon, she invited me inside for coffee and cookies. She has an immaculate home, well appointed with fine furnishings and art typical of an older, single woman's home (knick-knacks, ya know?). This conflicted slightly with my former impression of her being a scruffy, athletic, outdoorsie type. She drives a bright red Jeep CJ-7 Laredo.
As I ate my cookies, panic slowly welled up. The Hummel figurines mocked me from the glass shelves... I could hear them silently laughing at my rash decision. She monopolized the conversation and was intent upon discovering my opinion regarding dating as "a serious matter that should be undertaken with marriage as a goal". I struggled back with lame comments including keywords like "fun, recreation, casual, get-to-know-a-person"... all in vain. Then she asks me, "How do you feel about pre-nupts?" I was dumbfounded and speechless. Her Bichon Frise stared at me knowingly. After a lengthy monologue regarding her efforts to cut back on anti-depressants, I made up a reason to excuse myself, thanked her for the coffee and cookies, then beat a fast retreat towards the door.
You know what I'm going to ask... How do I get out of the weekend cabin invitation? I'm basically a nice guy and don't want to be rude or hurt her feelings. I hate to lie with some phony excuse, but a fun weekend with the gals is freaking me out. Should I just break my leg or something? Any advice would be appreciated. (Yeah, I know I screwed up)
--Suffocating in Seattle
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--Formerly: Gort--
Posts: 12954 | Registered: May 2004
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Dee.
Ship's Theological Acrobat
# 5681
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Posted
quote:
Being the bonehead I am, I was flattered and accepted without hesitation
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif) ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif) ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
Oh wow,
I cant wait to see how Sine suggests you get out of this one...personally I would go for self harm.
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Jesus - nice bloke, bit religious
Posts: 2679 | From: Under Downunder | Registered: Mar 2004
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Nutmeg
Ship's spice girl
# 5297
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Posted
I am also waiting to see sine's excellent suggestions too.
I thought of self harm too Dee- NZ, although constantly rehashing your last relationship and why you believe it failed usually scares most people off. Embellishing the story to include group sex and other 'unsavoury' practices might seem like fun at the time, but could result in some very nasty rumours.
![[Ultra confused]](graemlins/confused2.gif) ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
Posts: 2285 | From: under the verandah at the rum distillery | Registered: Dec 2003
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anglicanrascal
Shipmate
# 3412
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Gort:
Then she asks me, "How do you feel about pre-nupts?" I was dumbfounded and speechless.
Wow: a Pre-Pre-Nupt!
Posts: 3186 | From: Diocese of Litigalia | Registered: Oct 2002
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Alfred E. Neuman
What? Me worry?
# 6855
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Posted
Yeah, yeah. Yuck it up, Jokesters. All good humour is based on the misfortunes of others.
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--Formerly: Gort--
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
Gort's post sounds like something I've read before. I'm trying to think where.
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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duchess
Ship's Blue Blooded Lady
# 2764
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Posted
Gort,
Just tell her that you are unable to make it since you have an obligation you can not get out of. Try for example to find somebody who is in dire straights...needs to move that day or go volunteer somewhere do-gooder (old folks home, soup kitchen)...then you feel this is for reals and you are not making it up.
"It turns out I have this commitment to sing Gershwin songs at the old folks home that day. I am sorry I am unable to make it."
"I am going with my church to the soup kitchen to help out..."
"Turns out my friend Cody had to move across state to Spokane and has not packed! He swears I volunteered to help him!"
"My son needs me..."
[I swear I heard the theme from JAWS in my head when I read your post...]
[ 16. September 2005, 04:28: Message edited by: duchess ]
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♬♭ We're setting sail to the place on the map from which nobody has ever returned ♫♪♮
Ship of Fools-World Party
Posts: 11197 | From: Do you know the way? | Registered: May 2002
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KenWritez
Shipmate
# 3238
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Gort:
How do I get out of the weekend cabin invitation?
What a softball question! Jeez, I can answer this one with duchesses' hand tied behind her back.
Next time you see her, preferrably before the weekend event, you have two options:
1) Mention how much you enjoy being friends with her. "Gosh, I enjoy being friends with you." Then, to that little bon mot, append this: Tell her she reminds you of your mother or sister.
If you need the big guns, then go to Step 2:
2) Talk on and on about a new woman you just met at work and how crazy you are about her. Make sure the woman you describe is completely opposite to the widow so there is zero chance she'll think you're talking about her.
I think these will spike her wheels, but if you need more, I have them. (Finally, I get a chance to put into play all the "dump him, fast" strategies used on me! ![[Devil]](graemlins/devil.gif) )
Of course, there's always *coffcoff*honesty*coffcoff*. You could tell her: "I'm sorry, the situation has become such that I'm not comfortable any longer with going. I appreciate your willingness to invite me with your friends." Short, honest, to the point.
[ 16. September 2005, 05:53: Message edited by: KenWritez ]
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"The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd." --Quentin Tarantino, Pulp Fiction
My blog: http://oxygenofgrace.blogspot.com
Posts: 11102 | From: Left coast of Wonderland, by the rabbit hole | Registered: Aug 2002
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RooK
1 of 6
# 1852
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Posted
I don't have anywhere near the élan enthralled in Sine's pinkie finger, but I'm inclined to offer advice anyway. Simply put, Gort, I suspect that you are very much like me socially. Meaning, of course, that you're a complete lunk-head with respect to subtlety and grace. Of the few things left to you in the realm of the quasi-charming are integrity and honesty; I suggest that you do not foresake these. You have made an agreement, and I think it would work out best for you if you were to genuinely bust your ass to keep it regardless of personal difficulty. Because frankly a capacity to suffer for your honour is what makes it noteworthy in the first place.
I'm not saying that you should succumb to any strange ideas she might have about who or what she wants you to be. I'm saying you should hold yourself to a high ideal out of principle, and give the lady a chance to surprise you. At the very worst you'll have a funny story at the end of it all.
Posts: 15274 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA, Earth | Registered: Nov 2001
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babybear
Bear faced and cheeky with it
# 34
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Posted
Yes, do go, and then tell us all about it. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif) It will be far cheaper than breaking your leg etc.
Besides, she might have a cute friend.
Posts: 13287 | From: Cottage of the 3 Bears (and The Gremlin) | Registered: May 2001
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
I don't have anywhere near the élan enthralled in Sine's pinkie finger
Yes, and that's why I have an advice thread and you don't, Buckwheat. I have an uncanny ability to zero in on the heart of the matter. You have all overlooked the obvious.
The key is the Bichon Frise.
<Dog Allergy>
The woman, naturally, adores the the dog. There is no doubt she is taking little Fu-Fu with her to the cabin. All Gort has to do is call her and tell her he was incapacitated for nearly a day after just his short visit for cookies. There's no way he can spend a week-end in the dog's company. It would kill him at his age.
An added bonus is he'll never have to go into her condo again either and he can run in the other direction when he sees her out walking Fu-Fu.
(Of course he's got to hope she doesn't realize that Bichon Frises are recommended by the AKC as being a good breed for allergy sufferers. If she mentions it, I suggest that he say something along the lines of "Yes, that's what I thought too. Very strange." She can hardly call him a liar.)
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Cosmo
Shipmate
# 117
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
I don't have anywhere near the élan enthralled in Sine's pinkie finger
Yes, and that's why I have an advice thread and you don't, Buckwheat. I have an uncanny ability to zero in on the heart of the matter. You have all overlooked the obvious.
The key is the Bichon Frise.
<Dog Allergy>
The woman, naturally, adores the the dog. There is no doubt she is taking little Fu-Fu with her to the cabin. All Gort has to do is call her and tell her he was incapacitated for nearly a day after just his short visit for cookies. There's no way he can spend a week-end in the dog's company. It would kill him at his age.
An added bonus is he'll never have to go into her condo again either and he can run in the other direction when he sees her out walking Fu-Fu.
(Of course he's got to hope she doesn't realize that Bichon Frises are recommended by the AKC as being a good breed for allergy sufferers. If she mentions it, I suggest that he say something along the lines of "Yes, that's what I thought too. Very strange." She can hardly call him a liar.)
A masterful response of course and one, I'm glad to say, that launched itself into my own dense nut. It will be to Gort's advantage if she does call him a liar. Not only will he be out of the frame for his 'weekend' but he need have no more worries about her advances. She could hardly brand him a liar and then expect him to meet with her again - with or without the mutt.
Cosmo
Posts: 2375 | Registered: May 2001
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RuthW:
Gort's post sounds like something I've read before. I'm trying to think where.
Yes, this rings a bell with me too. I'm sure I've read this elsewhere a couple of years ago.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Custard
Shipmate
# 5402
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Posted
Go along with the intention of enjoying it no matter what.
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blog
Adam's likeness, Lord, efface;
Stamp thine image in its place.
Posts: 4523 | From: Snot's Place | Registered: Jan 2004
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Niënna
Ship's Lotus Blossom
# 4652
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Posted
Gort, you have great instincts. It is possible that she invited you so that her girlfriends could size you to see if you're fit to be her future mate... run for hills!
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[Nino points a gun at Chiki]
Nino: Now... tell me. Who started the war?
Chiki: [long pause] We did.
~No Man's Land
Posts: 2298 | From: Purgatory | Registered: Jun 2003
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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012
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Posted
Y'know, it's just possible that Gort has completely misread all the signs, and this lady was simply interested in a friendship.
But y'know, Gort, break your word, your agreement. Lie to someone you're were beginning to see as a friend.
For heaven's sake, she explicitly made it obvious that she was inviting him for his sparkling conversation, not because she fancied him.
*shakes head*
And, Sine, I'm surprised at you, encouraging Gort to do the dishonourable thing.
Sarkycow
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“Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Posts: 10787 | Registered: Jul 2001
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sarkycow:
Sine, I'm surprised at you, encouraging Gort to do the dishonourable thing.
This is an advice thread. I give advice. He asked how to get out it. I know a good way of getting rid of dead bodies too.
Besides, I think he made the whole thing up anyway.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
This is an advice thread. I give advice. He asked how to get out it. I know a good way of getting rid of dead bodies too.
Besides, I think he made the whole thing up anyway.
And normally you give good advice.
Are you having an off-day?
Sarkycow
(And his story does sound kinda familiar, whatever that means...)
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“Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”
Posts: 10787 | Registered: Jul 2001
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
I know a good way of getting rid of dead bodies too.
How do you do it?
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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Anna B
Shipmate
# 1439
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Posted
<cue theme from Rear Window >
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Bad Christian (TM)
Posts: 3069 | From: near a lot of fish | Registered: Oct 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
If it is real, what if the lady harbours such ardent affections for Gortie that she is willing to put Fu-Fu into boarding kennels for the weekend? Or- get rid of Fu-Fu entirely?
That would bugger things up a bit.
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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Alfred E. Neuman
What? Me worry?
# 6855
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Posted
I see that my old Viagra story has ruined my reputation for trustworthyness. (I thought that yarn was obvious from its context) Anyway, the problem I asked advice for is true and has resolved itself in an odd fashion. Thanks for the help Sine (and others) but I decided to just be honest and just go talk to her about my reservations.
This is exactly what happened: Instead of using the phone, I went and knocked on her door. When she answered, her first words were a little strident. "It's been a week! Why haven't you called me? Yes, I have her number, but keep in mind we have never gone out on a date, I have never used her number and the only sit-down, one-on-one conversation I've had with her was the episode over coffee and cookies. (the cabin weekend was 6 weeks away)
I opened my mouth to begin my spiel. I intended to just explain that I was nervous and uncomfortable about spending a weekend with her and the two friends (whom I've never met). I meant to apologize and ask if she would like to go have dinner sometime instead. I didn't get a chance to speak. I couldn't even answer her question about not calling. Immediately after that first question, she says, "Oh, I get it! You don't want to go to the cabin! I stood there like a wooden cigar-store indian.
I stammered, "Well, I..."
She interrupted with, "It's OK. I understand. Actually, I've been thinking it was a mistake inviting you out of the blue like that since we hardly know each other. Since you were here for lunch the other day, I've realized that we probably aren't on the same wavelength about dating. I tried to explain to you how serious the subject is to me, yadda yadda, blah blah, I'm a Christian woman and I don't believe in sex outside of marriage!" (I swear this is true, also I have NEVER said anything about sex to her) "Yackity yack, It seemed from our conversation that you have a more casual attitude towards relationships than I, soooo... (on and on)"
All I could do was stand there and nod like a bobble-head dummy wearing a deathmask and sporting a frozen grin. Eventually, I was able to extricate myself with a few mumbled apologies and escaped.
So ends the saga of Gort, The Selfish and Unreasonable. Thank you all very much for your kind considerations. I'll just go back to my cave now.
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--Formerly: Gort--
Posts: 12954 | Registered: May 2004
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jlg
What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Cosmo:
[content deleted because it's irrelevant to this post]
What on earth are you doing up here in Heaven?
Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by jlg:
quote:
Originally posted by Cosmo:
[content deleted because it's irrelevant to this post]
What on earth are you doing up here in Heaven?
I have a following you know. Even RooK was up here. The human drama on this thread is immense. Immense I tell you. Mothers, daughters, husbands, wives, love, jealousy, hatred, revenge, table settings...
It's life in a nutshell. Of course Cosmo reads it. All the best people do.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Moo:
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
I know a good way of getting rid of dead bodies too.
How do you do it?
That answer will cost you. But it involves strangling, carpets, and NFL stadiums.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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samara
Shipmate
# 9932
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Posted
And back to table settings. Well, sort of.
Tell me, how does one deal with leftovers at a restaurant? I can almost never clear my plate. Are doggie bags frowned on in polite company?
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Bookworms will rule the world (after we finish the background reading).
Courtesy of Trouble in China
Posts: 439 | From: Canada | Registered: Aug 2005
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Auntie Doris
Screen Goddess
# 9433
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
Of course Cosmo reads it. All the best people do.
Or maybe that should read, "All the best people read Cosmo"
Auntie Doris x
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"And you don't get to pronounce that I am not a Christian. Nope. Not in your remit nor power." - iGeek in response to a gay-hater :)
The life and times of a Guernsey cow
Posts: 6019 | From: The Rock at the Centre of the Universe | Registered: May 2005
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by samara:
how does one deal with leftovers at a restaurant? I can almost never clear my plate. Are doggie bags frowned on in polite company?
I think it's always best to pretend it's something the dog might actually eat*. That is to say, ask for the leftoever filet mignon to be boxed up, but not the house salad you didn't finish. That just looks pathetic and cheap.
This jerks one of my chains because my sister will ask for anything that's not nailed down to the table to be boxed up. I'm quite sure it's a - if you'll pardon the expression - leftover from her graduate student days, but sheesh. Those 2 tiny slices of pizza aren't what's standing between her and bankruptcy anymore.
(*So Ok, the dog in this house loves carrots, but you know what I mean.)
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Anna B
Shipmate
# 1439
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Posted
Dear Sine,
I am sick and tired of being served salad at the incorrect time, i.e. before the main course. Unfortunately, my husband believes that I am wrong, and when it is his turn to make dinner, he insists on serving salad first. How can I establish the correct procedure in our household? I am beginning to contemplate pulling a Lysistrata.
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Bad Christian (TM)
Posts: 3069 | From: near a lot of fish | Registered: Oct 2001
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RainbowKate
Shipmate
# 9331
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Posted
Dear Sine,
As fate would have my brother and partner have graduation ceremonies on the same day, 2000 miles apart. Brother is getting is B.A. and partner her M.A. I have told my parents and brother that I am attending my partner's graduation, and we are then packing a moving van and moving her back east. We've been in a long distance relationship for two years and got officially engaged a year ago. If we could get married we would have already.
Now, my brother is dissapointed but understands that my duty is first to my partner. My partner understands if I feel I should attend my brother's instead. My parents are furious with me and claim I have "destroyed" my brother's graduation. I'm just confused. Am I right in attending my partner's graduation over my brother's?
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Coffee is the answer
Posts: 1227 | From: Left at the loophole | Registered: Apr 2005
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RainbowKate:
Am I right in attending my partner's graduation over my brother's?
This is one that only you can answer, in conjunction with your partner and with prayer. But let me ask this: If your brother is ill and frightened, your parents are unreliable, and your mother is tormenting him, who else will be there for him? Is there anyone besides you?
A difficult choice. What you don't want to do, however, is let your parents' opinion influence you either way - either to cave to guilt and go, or not go just to show your independence. Try and keep them out of your mind when making your decision. Concentrate on your partner and your brother and their relative needs on what is a special day for each of them.
Good luck.
[ 17. September 2005, 19:04: Message edited by: Sine Nomine ]
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Prophetess:
I am sick and tired of being served salad at the incorrect time...How can I establish the correct procedure in our household?
Of course you're not wrong. What's with your husband? Did he used to be a waiter or something? Or from California, which I believe is where this particular abomination, along with so many others, originated?
However...I tend to cut people who will cook a meal for me a lot of slack, because the obvious answer would be for you to do all the cooking, and we don't want that, now do we?
But if you really want to make a point, you could just ignore your salad and desultorily play with your bread and butter until the main course arrives, then eat your room-temperature and disconsolate looking greenery afterwards. Wilted lettuce is a small price to pay for being right.
Probably better though just to serve the salad correctly on your nights in the kitchen. That will annoy him since he thinks you're doing it wrong, but he can't say much if you just smiled sweetly when it was his turn.
A little passive-agressive perhaps, but marriage is, after all, a rough proposition. Not for the faint-of-heart.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Anna B
Shipmate
# 1439
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
Did he used to be a waiter or something? Or from California, which I believe is where this particular abomination, along with so many others, originated?
![[Overused]](graemlins/notworthy.gif) Got it in one. He was born in Long Beach and grew up in the Valley. Apparently there are some things that even a Princeton education cannot eliminate.
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Bad Christian (TM)
Posts: 3069 | From: near a lot of fish | Registered: Oct 2001
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
Tell him that Helen Brown, in her famous West Coast Cookbook wrote in 1952:
quote:
Visitors to our Coast never fail to be impressed by our salads. Whether it's their excellence, which we modestly acknowledge, or the fact we serve them as a first course, which awes them, we are not sure. Actually, that salad-first custom, though almost invariably followed in restaurants, is not so common at home; we are quite apt to serve them with or after the entree as before it. Still it would be fun to know what started the restaurants on this curious habit, and when.
Nobody knew more about food history on the West Coast than Helen Brown. Not even James Beard.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Anna B
Shipmate
# 1439
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Posted
More about salad... perhaps, Sine, you can enlighten me on a point which has bothered me for some time. Among my Francis I wedding silver is a beautiful salad serving set as well as the salad forks that were part of the covers. How in the world am I supposed to serve salad without damaging the silver, as will happen when it comes in contact with anything acidic? It's been almost ten years now and the salad forks especially have little black spots on them that refuse to be polished away.
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Bad Christian (TM)
Posts: 3069 | From: near a lot of fish | Registered: Oct 2001
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Prophetess:
It's been almost ten years now and the salad forks especially have little black spots on them that refuse to be polished away.
I always put the flatware (except the knives) in a plastic dishpan of very hot soapy water with a little ammonia added as soon as I clear the table. If there are any tarnish spots I dip the tines in silver dip after washing and then rinse again. Don't let it air dry. Use a terry dish towel and dry immediately.
If all else fails go to Williams-Sonoma and get some Wenol™ metal polish. Don't use it on plate though. Actually you ought to have some Wenol™ anyway. Good for copper and brass too.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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RainbowKate
Shipmate
# 9331
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Posted
quote:
What you don't want to do, however, is let your parents' opinion influence you either way - either to cave to guilt and go, or not go just to show your independence.
Good advice, Sine. Thanks. It's really the power struggle between mom and I that this is about. It's hard to put that aside. It's also hard to want to be at my brother's when I know it will be full of my mother's drama.
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Coffee is the answer
Posts: 1227 | From: Left at the loophole | Registered: Apr 2005
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RainbowKate:
It's really the power struggle between mom and I that this is about.
Someone needs to tell your brother that in case he mistakenly thinks it's about him graduating from college.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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RainbowKate
Shipmate
# 9331
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Posted
quote:
Someone needs to tell your brother that in case he mistakenly thinks it's about him graduating from college.
Oh, he's aware. In our family any event is All About Mother. Currently she's giving him hell because he won't tell me that I have to come to his graduation instead of my partner's. So he's torn between wanting me to be there, and not wanting mom to think I've decided to go because he laid a guilt trip on me.
But it's time I quit playing her games and figure out what I need to do without watching the Mother Insanity Meter. Someone's got to act like an adult.
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Coffee is the answer
Posts: 1227 | From: Left at the loophole | Registered: Apr 2005
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Sine Nomine
Ship's backstabbing bastard
# 66
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
Mothers, daughters, husbands, wives, love, jealousy, hatred, revenge, table settings...
It's life in a nutshell.
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Precious, Precious, Sweet, Sweet Daddy...
Posts: 16639 | From: lat. 36.24/lon. 86.84 | Registered: Dec 2002
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jlg
What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by RainbowKate:
But it's time I quit playing her games and figure out what I need to do without watching the Mother Insanity Meter. Someone's got to act like an adult.
You have just taken the first step towards a much less stressful life. Now practice saying "I know, Mother, but that's what we have decided to do", which is going to be your response, repeated ad nauseamas necessary, to whatever your mother says, asks, threatens, demands, shrieks, etc.
Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
I can concur that that Broken Record technique indeed works with Unruly Mothers. (I totally feel you, RainbowKate)
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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RainbowKate
Shipmate
# 9331
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Posted
quote:
"I know, Mother, but that's what we have decided to do", which is going to be your response, repeated ad nauseamas necessary, to whatever your mother says, asks, threatens, demands, shrieks, etc.
This is good advice. So far I've been trying to treat her as a rational adult, but clearly that is not the way.
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Coffee is the answer
Posts: 1227 | From: Left at the loophole | Registered: Apr 2005
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Dee.
Ship's Theological Acrobat
# 5681
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Posted
quote:
So far I've been trying to treat her as a rational adult,
There it is, that's your problem right there. It took me 30 years to learn not to do that and now I have worked it out my life is much easier. Welcome to sanity Rainbow Kate now repeat after me "I am not responsable for my mothers happiness"
good and now the aforementioned line...
quote:
"I know, Mother, but that's what we have decided to do",
Excellent,and God go with you ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
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Jesus - nice bloke, bit religious
Posts: 2679 | From: Under Downunder | Registered: Mar 2004
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Prophetess:
It's been almost ten years now and the salad forks especially have little black spots on them that refuse to be polished away.
I was told many years ago that you can get permanent black spots on silver from an interaction between water and the tarnish-proof cloth that lines silver chests.
When you wash and dry silver, you might leave a tiny bit of water somewhere. The solution is that after you wash and dry it, leave it out to air for at least a few hours before you put it away. (I usually wash my silver in the evening, leave it on the dining room table overnight, and put it away in the morning.)
I don't know for a fact that this is true, but I have assumed it was, and my silver does not have any black spots.
Moo
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Kerygmania host
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See you later, alligator.
Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lola:
I was brought up to never read at the table. How does this apply to dining alone in a restaurant whilst travelling on business? I solved the problem by eating fish and chips on the prom looking out to sea.
There was a time when a classy restaurant would not seat a woman by herself . . . but that time has passed.
It has to be assumed that diners who patronize the hotel's dining room are guests of the hotel. After all, local residents would surely know of better (and more reasonably priced) dining spots. As such, you are perfectly entitled to occupy a table by yourself, with book or otherwise, and no one should suspect anything other than that you are traveling by yourself on business and that it is time for your evening meal.
I do, however, like your solution of dining on the veranda, provided that the weather and view are both pleasant. Or you could order room service and dine in your nightgown.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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samara
Shipmate
# 9932
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sine Nomine:
. . . leftover from her graduate student days, but sheesh.
You outed me! And the occasion which prompted the question was a "welcome to new people" dinner for our resesarch lab.
Thanks. I shall be more at ease. Though generally I just let them box whatever they wish.
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Bookworms will rule the world (after we finish the background reading).
Courtesy of Trouble in China
Posts: 439 | From: Canada | Registered: Aug 2005
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