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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Circus: Should I challenge Chorister to a Duel?
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dyfrig
Blue Scarfed Menace
# 15
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Posted
I feel deeply insulted.
Here Chorister clearly directs her hurtful "nee nar" in my direction. Not just "neenar", which I could cope with, but "nee nar", that pause in between filled with venom and contempt.
It is more than a man can stand.
But I am vexed - is my honour best served by merely telling her to piss off, or is this matter only that can only be resolved by one party ending up dead?
I call on you fine people to assist me in this dilemma.
Should I challenge Chorister to a Duel?
[ 03. May 2011, 13:32: Message edited by: Chorister ]
Poll information
This poll contains 1 question(s). 74 user(s) have voted.
You can't view the results of this poll without voting.
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"He was wrong in the long run, but then, who isn't?" - Tony Judt
Posts: 6917 | From: pob dydd Iau, am hanner dydd | Registered: Apr 2001
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Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
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Posted
As with most polls - including political elections - my choice isn't there.
My answer?
"Yes"
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
I can't really advise you one way or another because the decision has to be yours but I would ask whether or not you think it is seemly for someone British to act in such a way?
Certainly Foreigners might act in such a manner and, to an extent, one has to allow this as they weren't brought up any better but surely we Britishers should be setting an example.
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Welease Woderwick:
I can't really advise you one way or another because the decision has to be yours but I would ask whether or not you think it is seemly for someone British to act in such a way?
Certainly Foreigners might act in such a manner and, to an extent, one has to allow this as they weren't brought up any better but surely we Britishers should be setting an example.
Pshaw. FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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Ariston
Insane Unicorn
# 10894
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Posted
If any of us can figure out what the @#$% the Code Duello is for MAAN, I'll gladly be your second!
Chorister, you are officially a . . . well, I'm not sure if a man of honour like myself should be using that sort of strong language in mixed company. ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
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“Therefore, let it be explained that nowhere are the proprieties quite so strictly enforced as in men’s colleges that invite young women guests, especially over-night visitors in the fraternity houses.” Emily Post, 1937.
Posts: 6849 | From: The People's Republic of Balcones | Registered: Jan 2006
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Scarlet
Mellon Collie
# 1738
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Posted
I tried to vote, but couldn't pick just one answer. This issue is so multiple choice.
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They took from their surroundings what was needed... and made of it something more.
—dialogue from Primer
Posts: 4769 | Registered: Nov 2001
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
I'm with lil Buddha.
FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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Timothy the Obscure
Mostly Friendly
# 292
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Posted
You should keep in mind that the person challenged gets the choice of weapons. It might be wiser to provoke her into issuing the challenge, since I believe she is a soprano (if I'm mistaken and she's an alto, go right ahead).
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When you think of the long and gloomy history of man, you will find more hideous crimes have been committed in the name of obedience than have ever been committed in the name of rebellion.
- C. P. Snow
Posts: 6114 | From: PDX | Registered: May 2001
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Lyda*Rose
Ship's broken porthole
# 4544
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Posted
I voted for Hell. I'm in the mood for a dogpile, just not Silver Faux's.
I'm just not saying who I'd land on. ![[Two face]](graemlins/scot_twoface.gif)
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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano
Posts: 21377 | From: CA | Registered: May 2003
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Bean Sidhe
Shipmate
# 11823
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Posted
Heavens, yes. When does hosting the Circus get anyone flak? GO FOR IT!!!
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How do you know when a politician is lying?
His lips are moving.
Danny DeVito
Posts: 4363 | From: where the taxis won't go | Registered: Sep 2006
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Ariston
Insane Unicorn
# 10894
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Posted
She killed the Thread of Pointlessness we had a while back before I'd won. Take Her Down! Kill! Kill!! KILLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ![[Mad]](angryfire.gif)
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“Therefore, let it be explained that nowhere are the proprieties quite so strictly enforced as in men’s colleges that invite young women guests, especially over-night visitors in the fraternity houses.” Emily Post, 1937.
Posts: 6849 | From: The People's Republic of Balcones | Registered: Jan 2006
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
I'm not sure about this. Is it really Gentlemanly to challenge a lady to a duel? As WW implied, it doesn't seem Quite Cricket.
[pedant alert ON] You don't drink cream teas, you eat them. [/pedant alert OFF]
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
Did you actually mean "Cad" and "Bounder"?
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by piglet:
I'm not sure about this. Is it really Gentlemanly to challenge a lady to a duel?
Well...
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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Lyda*Rose
Ship's broken porthole
# 4544
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by piglet:
I'm not sure about this. Is it really Gentlemanly to challenge a lady to a duel? As WW implied, it doesn't seem Quite Cricket.
No?
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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano
Posts: 21377 | From: CA | Registered: May 2003
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
I'm with you on this, LR! A duel is a duel regardless of gender.
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
Need I mention I have met both LR and MT and know them well!
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
I should very much like to see Chorister have a fight in a boutique. You go, girl. Squash Dyfrig down to a size 8 in purple and leave him on the reduced items pile.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Imaginary Friend
Real to you
# 186
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Posted
Is that a euphemism?
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"We had a good team on paper. Unfortunately, the game was played on grass."
Brian Clough
Posts: 9455 | From: Left a bit... Right a bit... | Registered: May 2001
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Imaginary Friend:
Is that a euphemism?
I didn't know we had a brass band.
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Is this the time to mention I wasn't directing nee nar at Dyfrig (who is the unneeniest nar I could ever wish to meet)?
No, thought not.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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The Rogue
Shipmate
# 2275
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Posted
Who will choose the weapons? The challenger or the challengee? What weapons would those blood-thirsty shipmates who want a duel like to see used?
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If everyone starts thinking outside the box does outside the box come back inside?
Posts: 2507 | From: Toton | Registered: Feb 2002
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
How about cursing in Svenska (Swedish)? Or in German? Du ar inte fran Sverige? (You're not from Sweden?) Or French?
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
Option 7-- "Please challenge her! Pretty please! I can't wait to see her wipe the floor with you!"
![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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Angel Wrestler
Ship's Hipster
# 13673
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by piglet:
[pedant alert ON] You don't drink cream teas, you eat them. [/pedant alert OFF]
[tangent alert] Really???? ![[Eek!]](eek.gif) Cream tea isn't tea with cream in it???? [/tangent alert]
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The fact that no one understands you does not make you an artist.
(unknown)
Posts: 2767 | From: half-way up the ladder | Registered: May 2008
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
Mais non. It's a scone with lovely thick clotted cream and home-made jam*, and is v.v. yummy.
Tea with cream in it?????? ![[Ultra confused]](graemlins/confused2.gif)
* or if you're in Essex, Tiptree jam, which is the next best thing.
[ 18. October 2010, 01:32: Message edited by: piglet ]
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by piglet:
Mais non. It's a scone with lovely thick clotted cream and home-made jam*, and is v.v. yummy.
Tea with cream in it??????
* or if you're in Essex, Tiptree jam, which is the next best thing.
A sone? Don't you mean several scones?
It is actually accompanied by a pot of tea and is best served in a farmhouse where they make the clotted cream on the premises.
Tiptree jam is of the Gods - but then I am an Essex boy. It was also available in Liverpool if you knew where to look.
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
All this talk of dueling and, as of yet no blood on the sand. The only *duel* so far in MAAN came to naught but apologies. So dreary... sigh
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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Tortuf
Ship's fisherman
# 3784
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Posted
I am so sorry.
Next time I will commit seppuku, just for you.
Posts: 6963 | From: The Venice of the South | Registered: Dec 2002
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by lilBuddha:
All this talk of dueling and, as of yet no blood on the sand. The only *duel* so far in MAAN came to naught but apologies. So dreary... sigh
Given the way it has been talked up by its instigators, that appears to be what they want.
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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Ariston
Insane Unicorn
# 10894
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Posted
And looking at this thread, I see a lot of people clamoring for Chorister's blood without being willing to lay their own on the line.
Come on, you yellow-bellied pantywaists! The hosts have practically begged for some off-kilter personalities to have it out at ten paces.
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“Therefore, let it be explained that nowhere are the proprieties quite so strictly enforced as in men’s colleges that invite young women guests, especially over-night visitors in the fraternity houses.” Emily Post, 1937.
Posts: 6849 | From: The People's Republic of Balcones | Registered: Jan 2006
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Banner Lady
Ship's Ensign
# 10505
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Posted
Isn't it up to the duellists to choose their seconds (and maybe their thirds, fourths and fifths) or are we back to talking about cream teas again?
Scones at 10 paces perhaps?
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Women in the church are not a problem to be solved, but a mystery to be enjoyed.
Posts: 7080 | From: Canberra Australia | Registered: Oct 2005
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Ariston
Insane Unicorn
# 10894
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Posted
Now there's a good idea!
Hmmm . . . fruit or cheese, though?
This sounds like my kind of duel!
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“Therefore, let it be explained that nowhere are the proprieties quite so strictly enforced as in men’s colleges that invite young women guests, especially over-night visitors in the fraternity houses.” Emily Post, 1937.
Posts: 6849 | From: The People's Republic of Balcones | Registered: Jan 2006
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Banner Lady
Ship's Ensign
# 10505
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Posted
AA, well, if they had to use one of MY scones, it would be entirely possible to do permanent damage. I think they would still have to choose their weapons very carefully, even if it WAS scones!
Now as to location....hmmm....the coffee & chat room perhaps?
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Women in the church are not a problem to be solved, but a mystery to be enjoyed.
Posts: 7080 | From: Canberra Australia | Registered: Oct 2005
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dyfrig
Blue Scarfed Menace
# 15
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Posted
The various contributions above are all terribly interesting. Of course, as "interesting" posters do tend to get banned from the Ship, I don't think I should rely on any of your opinions, so as to avoid guilt by association.
As the duel rules have yet to be clarified, it seems premature to act on the outcome of the vote, and anyway I am rubbish at iambic pentametre. Once the form, nature, purpose, effectiveness, potentiality and essence of the duel system have been fully enunciated and systematised, we will be in a better position to determine the best course of action.
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"He was wrong in the long run, but then, who isn't?" - Tony Judt
Posts: 6917 | From: pob dydd Iau, am hanner dydd | Registered: Apr 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
This Cream Tea was tucked into into by shipmate number 1613, who declared it delicious, as I recall. (Note, if you will, how the cream is spread liberally on top of the scone and a dollop of strawberry jam placed strategically on top.) However, it is well-known in Creamtealand that scones more than two days old make excellent weapons, being harder than cannonballs as a rule.
Dyfrig has been extremely kind in giving me a jewel, him being a proper Diamond Geezer, an' all. I shall wear it with pride and call it 'Beryl'.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Lyda*Rose
Ship's broken porthole
# 4544
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Banner Lady:
AA, well, if they had to use one of MY scones, it would be entirely possible to do permanent damage. I think they would still have to choose their weapons very carefully, even if it WAS scones!
Now as to location....hmmm....the coffee & chat room perhaps?
Ah, I see you are a specialist in dwarf battle scones. I trust the hold up for many years. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano
Posts: 21377 | From: CA | Registered: May 2003
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jedijudy
Organist of the Jedi Temple
# 333
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Posted
Lo, for many years have I been aboard this Ship, and after all this time, even though ITTWACW it appears I am mistaken. Shock. Horror.
Chorister, can I be your second? I can contribute a batch of donuts my mom made which were weapons in disguise.
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Jasmine, little cat with a big heart.
Posts: 18017 | From: 'Twixt the 'Glades and the Gulf | Registered: Aug 2001
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
As Harry Hill would say, I like Dyfrig, and I like Chorister, but which one is better.....
There's only one way to find out.........
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Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
Chorister's all right (sometimes). I'm contributing a vat of cold porridge for her defence.
(This was the stuff that in medieval days they used to pour over the ramparts onto the enemy, fire at them from trebuchets, etc. It clogged up their armour, seized up their joints and extinguished the will to live.)
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Leaf
Shipmate
# 14169
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Posted
<Ariel, I expect that in your version of 1984, the cage strapped on to your face would contain porridge creeping slowly toward you.>
Posts: 2786 | From: the electrical field | Registered: Oct 2008
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lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Tortuf:
I am so sorry.
Next time I will commit seppuku, just for you.
Boring! Isn't about the blood, but the action. Don't care whether is a sword or these silly things.
Challenger: I challenge you to a duel! Except not really, I am so very sorry for my part in creating the perceived need for a duel.
Challenged: I accept! Also not really and I apologize for my behaviour as well.
sigh
[ 18. October 2010, 19:11: Message edited by: lilBuddha ]
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I put on my rockin' shoes in the morning
Hallellou, hallellou
Posts: 17627 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008
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Banner Lady
Ship's Ensign
# 10505
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Posted
Lyda Rose, indeed, I am a specialist in battle scones. But they are nothing compared to my rock cakes. Those things really take the biscuit.
And Ariel, I will pit my bread pudding against your porridge any day. I have been known to make it to the consistency of plaster. A much sweeter and claggier death will ensue.
BL. Culinary armourer to the needy and desperate.
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Women in the church are not a problem to be solved, but a mystery to be enjoyed.
Posts: 7080 | From: Canberra Australia | Registered: Oct 2005
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Ariston
Insane Unicorn
# 10894
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Posted
You know, I think this is turning into a better duel than anything on the real Field of Hono(u)r.
And BL, I see you your Killer Bread Pudding and raise you a batch of "We're out of baking powder, so let's just use soda" fruit scones. If your throat doesn't dissolve, it must be made of steel.
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“Therefore, let it be explained that nowhere are the proprieties quite so strictly enforced as in men’s colleges that invite young women guests, especially over-night visitors in the fraternity houses.” Emily Post, 1937.
Posts: 6849 | From: The People's Republic of Balcones | Registered: Jan 2006
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jedijudy
Organist of the Jedi Temple
# 333
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Posted
I can also contribute concrete fudge upon request.
Perhaps MAAN should have been in the Circus all along?
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Jasmine, little cat with a big heart.
Posts: 18017 | From: 'Twixt the 'Glades and the Gulf | Registered: Aug 2001
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Lyda*Rose
Ship's broken porthole
# 4544
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Posted
Oh, man, I haven't seen good cement fudge in years. I had a friend who could make it come out like obsidian. I always wanted to see if you could knap it into spear points. ![[Cool]](cool.gif)
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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano
Posts: 21377 | From: CA | Registered: May 2003
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Banner Lady:
And Ariel, I will pit my bread pudding against your porridge any day. I have been known to make it to the consistency of plaster. A much sweeter and claggier death will ensue.
Right. I'm unveiling the super-weapon - Traditional British Christmas Fruitcake. Baked by old ladies who survived the war, any amount of German bombs and what Hitler could throw at them, and outlived most of their families, there is nothing to compare with this cake. Weighing approximately 1 ton, each cake comes encased in thick, rock-solid, tooth-shattering white icing, for which special equipment is needed to cut it. Inside, the cake, which according to tradition will have been left in a dark place to grow in strength and power over the months, will have a frighteningly solid consistency, interspersed with grit.
It is a test of manhood that any British male will be given, and expected to eat without protest, at least one large slice of this every Christmas and expected to be complimentary, or at best, show no signs of distress. That, and the porridge, will be my contributions.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Gill H
Shipmate
# 68
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Posted
I am so disappointed at the lack of a duel. I've been watching this just to gear myself up:
Bunfight at the OK Tearooms
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*sigh* We can’t all be Alan Cresswell.
- Lyda Rose
Posts: 9313 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Ariston
Insane Unicorn
# 10894
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Posted
Look, your fruitcake may be quite useful as a defense (and as a test of Young Eligible Men seeking Paternal Approval), but honestly? Lifting one of those things, much less using it in combat, is nigh-well impossible. It reminds me of the Nazi V-3 cannon project; sure, giant guns are useful, so long as you can aim them . . .
Instead, I'll be arming myself with some of the greatest Terrors of Trail Food: jalepeno squeeze cheese (think EZ Cheez with bits of jalepeno, all packed into a giant ketchup packet), cans of ham (beware, the edges of those lids are sharp!) and . . . PEMMICAN BARS.
Think of British Fruitcake in bar form, but without the cherries or icing. It's like eating lead, and a trip through the human body doesn't change a thing.
To all would-be opponents: You Have Been Warned.
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“Therefore, let it be explained that nowhere are the proprieties quite so strictly enforced as in men’s colleges that invite young women guests, especially over-night visitors in the fraternity houses.” Emily Post, 1937.
Posts: 6849 | From: The People's Republic of Balcones | Registered: Jan 2006
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