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Source: (consider it) Thread: From brain to mouth
jedijudy

Organist of the Jedi Temple
# 333

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First, I have to confess that I have never been paid to be a speaker of any type. That would be a horrible disaster and cause confusion and laughter among my listeners. Any distraction oooh! Shiny!! and my words tend to wander.

It's good to know I'm not alone, but hearing word wandering by professionals is always surprising, even though it happens fairly frequently.

For instance, as I was driving home today, I was listening to our local NPR station. The newscaster, who was subbing for the normal program host, was reporting on the successful test of a missile in North Korea. He told us that the Koreans had "successfully launched an inter-galactic ballistic missile."

So, please share things you have heard (or said!) that were not at all the intended message!

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Jasmine, little cat with a big heart.

Posts: 17620 | From: 'Twixt the 'Glades and the Gulf | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged
Jay-Emm
Shipmate
# 11411

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When warning about some spilt oil that I'd mostly cleared up, informing a female colleague, that it would be should be ok to do their job with care, but not to do any dancing or pole vaulting in that area. At least that was the brain version [Hot and Hormonal]
Posts: 1581 | Registered: May 2006  |  IP: Logged
Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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The following is my favorite Freudian slip story of all.

Many years ago I worked for a short time as the word processing supervisor of a small law firm in Houston, Texas. This was still in the days of the proprietary word processing systems: Vydec, NBI, Wang, IBM System 6, and so on. This particular firm used Wang.

Shortly after I had been hired, the senior partner, whose first name was Bill, threw a party at his house for all attorneys and supervisory staff.

I fell into conversation with Bill's wife, and naturally we talked about word processing and what a fascinating concept the notion of automated document production was. (It was in those days!)

In the course of our conversation, Bill's wife told me she often dabbled with the system. "I just love to play with Bill's Wang!" she told me.

I believe I was able to keep a straight face.

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"We're not in Wonderland anymore, Alice." – Charles Manson

Posts: 10124 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061

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About twenty years ago the Chesapeake Bay was afflicted with pfisteria (sp?) bacteria, better known as 'flesh-eating' bacteria. Fish were caught in the Bay with lesions, displayed horridly for the TV cameras in extreme closeup. The local newscasters went wild, with headlines about the Pfisteria Hysteria, frantic consulting of experts on camera to learn if it was safe to eat the fish, what about boaters, and so forth.
A newsman was clearly reading the stuff as rapidly as he could off of the teleprompter. Repeatedly over the course of the news segment he spoke about these frightening micro-orgasms, their effect upon the drinking water supply, a report on the micro-orgasms from an NIH biologist. My husband and I listened to this and laughed until we fell on the floor. The children stared at us in wonder.

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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

Posts: 5060 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged
Stercus Tauri
Shipmate
# 16668

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Perhaps this overlaps a little into spoonerism territory. I remember a CBC radio newsreader one morning who realised a little too late that it was actually Turkish Kurds he was trying to talk about.

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Thay haif said. Quhat say thay, Lat thame say (George Keith, 5th Earl Marischal)

Posts: 819 | From: On the traditional lands of the Six Nations. | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged
SusanDoris

Incurable Optimist
# 12618

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quote:
Originally posted by jedijudy:
First, I have to confess that I have never been paid to be a speaker of any type. That would be a horrible disaster and cause confusion and laughter among my listeners. Any distraction oooh! Shiny!! and my words tend to wander.

It's good to know I'm not alone, but hearing word wandering by professionals is always surprising, even though it happens fairly frequently.

For instance, as I was driving home today, I was listening to our local NPR station. The newscaster, who was subbing for the normal program host, was reporting on the successful test of a missile in North Korea. He told us that the Koreans had "successfully launched an inter-galactic ballistic missile."

So, please share things you have heard (or said!) that were not at all the intended message!

[Big Grin] [Big Grin] [Big Grin] Aaaah, if only that inter-galactic travel were possible!!!

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I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.

Posts: 2872 | From: UK | Registered: May 2007  |  IP: Logged
SusanDoris

Incurable Optimist
# 12618

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Brenda Clough

[Big Grin] [Big Grin] [Big Grin] thank you!!

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I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.

Posts: 2872 | From: UK | Registered: May 2007  |  IP: Logged
Firenze

Ordinary decent pagan
# 619

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I remember that talk from the package holiday rep and the solicitations that we go to the evening of flamingo dancing...
Posts: 17224 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
jedijudy

Organist of the Jedi Temple
# 333

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Some very appreciated laughs going on here!

Once, the TV newscaster was telling us about a submarine that could go 50,000 miles beneath the surface of the ocean. I'd see that movie!

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Jasmine, little cat with a big heart.

Posts: 17620 | From: 'Twixt the 'Glades and the Gulf | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged
Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061

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An image: the sign at the meat counter says "Boneless Skinless Children's Thighs."

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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

Posts: 5060 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged
Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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They go well with brats for the barbie.

--------------------
"We're not in Wonderland anymore, Alice." – Charles Manson

Posts: 10124 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Graven Image
Shipmate
# 8755

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About 40 years ago during a very cold winter Mr Image was seeking to buy a knitted neck collar that one could wear as an extra layer under a shirt or V neck sweater, known as a dickie. He was unable to find any in the men's shop and I suggested being that women also wore the same thing he might be able to find them in a women's apparel shop. So the next day he went up to the sales person in a women's store and asked, "Do you handle men's dickies?" We will never know as he turned and left the store in a red faced hurry.
Posts: 2562 | From: Third planet from the sun. USA | Registered: Nov 2004  |  IP: Logged
Ohher
Shipmate
# 18607

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En route to the tutoring center where I teach is a framed B&W photograph showing the exterior of a shop. On the shopfront is sign which reads "BRAINS 25 cents."

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Formerly Foolhearty. Back after somewhat less than 40 years in the wilderness.

Posts: 129 | From: New Hampshire, USA | Registered: Jun 2016  |  IP: Logged
wild haggis
Shipmate
# 15555

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In Clydebank we had a butcher in 1950s called Mr Tough (absolutely true). The notice above his shop was "IF it's Tough's it's tender!"

There's a story about making black pudding..............

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wild haggis

Posts: 51 | From: Cardiff | Registered: Mar 2010  |  IP: Logged


 
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