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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Everlasting....
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Pangolin Guerre:
Xylographer of considerable talent, Teddy bided her time carving an image of Giovanna in a Ferrari - in El Paso!
"'elp!" a soldier cried, as wood chips flew out of Teddy's car.
[edited for page break]
[ 21. July 2017, 21:53: Message edited by: Mamacita ]
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango with Giovanna?
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Nah, said Scaramouche (a new arrival into the scene), for he knew that Giovanna was fatale - for, knowing her past in Argentina, Scaramouche was acquainted with a particular tango homicide.
[ 23. July 2017, 03:17: Message edited by: Pangolin Guerre ]
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
"Dennis Wheatley novels?", said God, as Satan began unpacking his luggage on arrival in Heaven, "If you're hoping I'll give you another chance and let you stay here, you're going the wrong way about it".
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
"Tit for tat, thought Teddy as she caught Giovanna in the sights of her sniper's rifle.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
Flee, Giovanna, lest you bite the dust!
[ 24. July 2017, 17:11: Message edited by: Mamacita ]
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Stunned and hurt by God's cold welcome, Satan repacked his books, and decided that the action would be in El Paso, so summoned his minion Ken the Demon, reluctantly.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
Ken the demon reluctantly accepted his old job back, his attempts at finding any other employment having failed due to the fact that all the available jobs involved work.
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Ed worked his magic and managed to buy a battered Mini from a used car dealership, and he and Anna were off to El Paso, vengeance and passsionate love in his wounded heart.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
He artfully dodged the police as he sped off to Texas.
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Tot, exasperated, screamed for a nice warm bottle.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Hat trick, of course, for Giovanna and -- oh, whichever of her many men friends you care to pick -- she certainly wouldn't have a clue!
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
A Clue game marathon was the order of the day when the assorted angels, demons, ex-beloveds, etc., of all the afore named grew so sick of all the main characters that they pitched in together and locked them all in an adobe house in a quiet neighborhood in Austin, Texas.
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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
As expected, though late to the party, seasoned cop Ray (investigating the guesome murders of the mechanic Jake and his girlfriend Val) and his squeamish-at-the sight-of-blood deputy Bert descended into El Paso.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
So they rented a dented, old, tan van from Rent-My=Wreck, stocked up on Gatorade, fast food and Depends, and headed off to Austin, home of artists, filmmakers, and really good music.
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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Sickened by the motion of the van, Bert vomited repeatedly - blood was not his only bete noir.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
"Oi, Ray and Bert!", exclaimed Ronald McDonald, as Ray and Bert sat eating at McDonalds in Austin, "My friend Scaramouche and the others are all locked in an adobe house! Help them!" He gave them the address of the house and then went off to have something to eat at Burger King.
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Kingston is a lovely place, thought Bert as he contemplated a change of career.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Are, er, we talking about Kingston, Jamaica; Kingston, Ontario; or Kingston, New York? wondered Bert's friends -- if Kingston, New York, at least it isn't Poughkeepsie.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Siesta time, thought Giovanna, oblivious to being in the cross hairs of vengeful Teddy.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
[punting]
Dying for a beer, Ray and Bert walked into an El Paso dive for a Corona (limes supplied by Giovanna), only to see at the bar Ken the demon, now on his eighth tequila.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
"Quila, Quila, is there anywhere here for me to hide!?", asked Ken panic-strickenly to the barmaid, "I've just seen my boss come in here and I'm supposed to be working!"
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
In gross inebriation, Ken experienced a prescient hallucination of the boss's arrival, having eaten the worm and chatted with a nonexistent coyote.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Wet Kipper
Circus Runaway
# 1654
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Posted
yo ! tell that crazy lady I ain't playing no fool
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- insert randomly chosen, potentially Deep and Meaningful™ song lyrics here -
Posts: 9841 | From: further up the Hill | Registered: Nov 2001
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Oolite is a word I found in my dictionary after I had a few minutes of head-scratching following the last post by Wet Kipper.
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I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Per Ken's tequila-induced precognitive vision, Satan arrived, not in search of Ken, but of drinks after a bad series of days.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
"Day Six", Ken wrote in his diary, "I've been hiding inside Satan's head now for six days, the one place he's least likely to suspect and he's become really lazy due to 'The Ken Effect'. He's going to start suspecting something soon though and then he'll get an exorcist in. That should be a laugh!".
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Ghostly visions started to disturb Satan's sight as he knocked backed a succession of Bourbons, not leaving his bar stool for six days, causing him to wonder hypochondriacally, Is it the booze, or a tumour?
[ 04. August 2017, 15:56: Message edited by: Pangolin Guerre ]
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
"At, um, our customary hour," mused Satan, "we will make an appearance that will leave their tails spinning."
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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no prophet's flag is set so...
Proceed to see sea
# 15560
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Posted
In gall bladders, sometimes there are very painful stones.
Posts: 11498 | From: Treaty 6 territory in the nonexistant Province of Buffalo, Canada ↄ⃝' | Registered: Mar 2010
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Estimating that he had now been drinking for eight days uninterrupted, Satan forgot about his head (booze? tumour?), and turned his thoughts to the shooting pain in his abdomen, wondering whether it might be gall stones, or the bad nachos.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
"Ach! Ostensibly appendicitis," opined the good Doctor Schadenfreude, whom Satan regularly consulted in crises such as the present.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Resentment and bitterness only get worse if they are allowed to fester.
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I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Terminal resentment and bitterness, in the case of Theodora.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Dora the Explorer never ran into Ken or Giovanna on her adventures.
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Reservations made at El Paso's swankiest Argentine restaurant, Scaramouche hoped there to lull Giovanna (who unwittingly had escaped Teddy's shot) into a false sense of security, and his revenge for the tango death of his porteno comrade upon her to wreak.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
A knowing nod from Satan, followed by a wink, reminded Scaramouche, however, that this was the very restaurant where Satan had acquired a nasty case of appendicitis.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Scaramouche had found that it was difficult to dance a fandango with a ruptured appendix.
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
"Dixon, watch what you're doing with those castanets...aaaaaaargh...f*** f*** f***...aaaarghohhhhh!!!", yelled Dave Roberts the guitarist, in agony, to his musical partner Steve Dixon, both of them from Barnsley in England.
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Glandular fever, the diagnosis of which had apparently escaped our good Doctor Schadenfreude, had, you see, infected all of the heroes and heroines of our ragged little fable.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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no prophet's flag is set so...
Proceed to see sea
# 15560
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Posted
A bleak and terrible lingering illness, featuring festering boils in armpits, pus oozing from bodily crevices, and gangrenous snot from orifices I shall not name, were Satan's disgusting, yet deserved gifts, bestowed on vile and despicable toadies such as Scaramouche and his ilk.
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Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
\_(ツ)_/
Posts: 11498 | From: Treaty 6 territory in the nonexistant Province of Buffalo, Canada ↄ⃝' | Registered: Mar 2010
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
Silken hair fetchingly gathered back, elegant Giovanna took her seat across from Scaramouche, and wondered at his oozing of effluent.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
"Fluent in medical jargon I am not," offered Giovanna, "but let me simply ask you, Moochie: Are you sick?"
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Eutychus
From the edge
# 3081
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Posted
Yo, us Icknield Way walkers are not usually so fluent in gangsta.
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Let's remember that we are to build the Kingdom of God, not drive people away - pastor Frank Pomeroy
Posts: 17944 | From: 528491 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Urfshyne
Shipmate
# 17834
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Posted
Angst? Actually, I'm not anxious but livid!
Posts: 98 | From: Maidenhead - lost | Registered: Sep 2013
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
"I'd like a burger, fries and a large coke, please", said Ronald McDonald to the waiter at the posh restaurant, "Oh hi, Moochie. Are you going to introduce me to your lady friend? No Mr Waiter, please don't throw me out! I went to a lot of trouble to buy this dinner jacket!" Giovanna was unimpressed by Scaramouche's friend and Scaramouche sat embarrassed and devastated, the whole evening's effect ruined.
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Pangolin Guerre
Shipmate
# 18686
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Posted
In Ed's breast pocket was a Lonely Planet guide to demonology - he, thinking to use it on Giovanna, unaware that he might have to use it to exorcise Satan of Ken.
Posts: 758 | From: 30 arpents de neige | Registered: Nov 2016
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Kentish ragstone was used in the construction of many churches in the south-east.
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I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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