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Life is short, I don't want to spend my whole life bettering myself. Sometimes I want to worse myself.

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Originally posted by ken:

I sort of hope they do get Wales though because then we can use that great quote from "man for all seasons"

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You seem to have perfectly grasped the point I was making, and imagined that I was saying something else.

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Originally posted by mousethief:
Angry at God? Moo

Okay I tried that and I'm still angry.

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Originally posted by John P:

If, when I die, I am accused by the Almighty of not fulfilling my purpose I will honestly reply "Well I'm terribly sorry, but you might have made it a bit clearer."

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a theological scrapbook

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I can believe in six impossible things before breakfast, but I can disbelieve a zillion impossible things before I tuck myself back into bed at night.

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For me, being part of a church gives me a space where I can bounce off other Christians

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Originally posted by Esmeralda:
Apologies for doing this to an apprentice, but Protozoan's statement in Purg gave me a wonderful mental picture:

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For me, being part of a church gives me a space where I can bounce off other Christians

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S/he obviously goes to the Inflatable Church!

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You can dislike us all you fucking want, but do NOT keep insinuating that we're just some sort of fifth column or sleeper cell for the big bad evil fundamentalists. At least give us credit for being honest in what we believe and do.

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Seriously, shipmates
I may not be a
Literary giant or even
Very good at
Exceptionally trite
Rhymes, like some I could mention.

Fancifully, perhaps, I imagine I
Am also not
Usually as big a
Xxxxing twat, as some I could mention.

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I'm not quite sure what a bigass truck is, let alone how you adorn it with super pricy Grills, or what a "Calvin peeing" decal represents, or how you bungee it in a bed, but it all sounds fantastic, and with a couple of England flags added for good measure, just think how you could increase your amusement.

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Originally posted by mousethief:
we're talking round pipes. Perfectly round. There is no edge. It's the exact 180° opposite of having an edge. You can't get any less edgy than a cylinder. Their edgeosity factor is nil. No edgeness. Completely unedgeified. It's not a sword in any way, shape, or form. Give it up.

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So, for me, Christianity is really a philosophical choice, which I accept because it is good. It's a lifestyle I decide (attempt) to adhere to for its own sake, because of its inherent excellence and attractiveness, and not necessarily because it is literally true. Speculative understanding of the immortal gods/God is a fruitless task, about which I am in any case profoundly agnostic. Yet, if what is "good" is true, there is a certain ineffable "truth" at the heart of Christianity.

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I thought men's ordination to the flower guild was a dead horse.

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Originally posted by Tortuf:



Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, kfingers, a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. He hath bore me on his back a thousand times, and now how abhorr'd in my imagination it is!
My gorge rises at it.

We here in the Ship come not to bury Yorick, but to praise him. The trolling that men do lives after them,
The good is oft interred with their bones,
So let it be with Yorick ... The noble jlg
Hath told you Yorick was an asshole:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Yorick answered it ...

He hath brought many agnostics home to Mumbai,
Whose medications did the general coffers fill:
Did this in Yorick seem ambitious?
When that the poor have cried in Mumbai, Yorick hath bragged:

What cause withholds you then to mourn for him?
O judgement! thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason…. Bear with me;
My heart is in the coffin there with Yorick,
And I must pause till it come back to me.

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Originally posted by Leaf:
Wait, wait... so on this thread, mousethief is appealing to the plain meaning of Scripture, while NJA is arguing from his tradition?

I need a drink.

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Originally posted by Moo:
When I read the Greek of the New Testament I am constantly reminded of the words of my Greek professor. His field was classical Greek. He was also a devout Christian. He said that he read the NT with very mixed feelings. As a Christian, he was aware of the holiness of the text. As a lover of the Greek language, he was appalled.

Moo

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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!

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I don't think I could take an anarchist seriously with a double mocha choca frapo capo latte in his hand (unless he was going to throw it on a passing poodle after refusing to pay for it).

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Originally posted by AristonAstuanax:
Bring forth the sinner!

"Do you, romanlion, renounce the Tea Party and all its works?"
«I do.»
"And likewise idiotic arguments?"
«I do.»
"Do you hereby embrace the entire Constitution of the United States of America, including Article Five, and all amendments to this document, having been made according to its direction?"
«I do.»
"Do you so promise before God and us, your brothers and sisters, to turn away from stupidity and embrace right reason, beginning again in a new life on the Ship?"
«I do.»
"Then I now bitchslap thee in the name of the Legislative, Executive and Judicial branches. Amen."

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Pissing into the wind is usually a good idea. I don't know anyone who couldn't do with a little watering now and again.

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Originally posted by Alex Cockell:

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Originally posted by infinite_monkey:
I have GOT to know what the sign for "Kumbayah" looks like.

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Simple. It's the same as "AAAAUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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Originally posted by AristonAstuanax:

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Originally posted by Gracious rebel:

Did anyone else sing one to the tune of Do-reh-mi that started

'S for Sin a dreadful thing
A for Adam who first fell...'

(it spelt out the word SAVIOUR; wouldn't have worked accross the pond as the spelling is different! In fact the ABC one wouldn't have worked either, as Z has to rhyme with 'ahead'!!)

We also sung one in the church children's club to the tune of 'Michael rowed the boat ashore' about the ten commandments (I suspect my father my have written this one). The only lines I can recall are 'Do not steal, and do not kill (alleluia), love in marriage is God's will (allelulia)'

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Why do these sound like the sorts of Horrors Of Religion that people tell their therapists about years later/use in their navel-gazing memoirs about Why They Left Religion?

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Originally posted by MiceElf:
Dammn You.... It was going so well.

Last night I had fondly remembered our girl group rehearsing
"What a Friend We Have In Jesus "
sung to the tune of
"The Carnival is Over" by The Seekers...

O.K. I was 14 then and easily impressed.

Then I woke up at 5.00 AM with Bloody Father Abraham spinning round my head. I have taken a pill, but someone has called the men in coats and I think there is time for one more chorus before the van arrives.

Cos I am one of them and so are you...

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Originally posted by Sioni Sais:
Mousetheif in "This Land is Your Land"

Originally posted by Carex:
I know one person who was treed by a bear and sat up there for several hours with the bear peering up at him trying to remember if it was the Black or Brown bear that can't climb trees.

I have this great mental image of the bear at the foot of the tree muttering, "Now, am I the right kind of bear to climb up after this snack? I'd hate to be the wrong kind of bear and fall out of the tree. Let me remember, let me remember...."

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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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*"Sheesh" is intended as an expression of exasperation, and in no way implies or endorses disrespect for OLASJC.

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Originally posted by mousethief:

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Originally posted by Foaming Draught:

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Originally posted by Eutychus:
another biblical principle

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Take my yolk upon you?

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If your yolk is light, they aren't free-range chickens.

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Man, today started off awful for me, watching Yorick and Numpty slap-fight in this thread is better than unicorns bringing me ice cream and angels farting rainbows.

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You know, if you have nothing to say, you could just say nothing. Saying less than nothing creates a kind of intellectual vacuum that makes a sucking sound that kind of spoils one's enjoyment of the rest of the thread.

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Originally posted by Call me Numpty:

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Originally posted by fletcher christian:
What is church discipline (or lack thereof?) Can you expand on what you mean?

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It's the third defining mark of a true church as defined in the classic confessions of the Reformation. Anglicanism never bought into it, hence the sad sight of some bearded hermit telling an insane witch not to where a pointy hat in church.

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Originally posted by kankucho on the "Who is evangelical?" thread in Purg:
ISTM that anyone who purports to embrace a religion (Christian or otherwise) without recommending it to others is not a believer at all, but merely a customer.

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Originally posted by Spiffy:

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Originally posted by Lyda*Rose:
I'm as patriotic as the next gal. I'll be out on the 4th having a good, old time listening to J. P. Sousa marches and quotes from the Declaration of Independence and the Preamble to the Constitution, singing "America the Beautiful", and cheering the fireworks. There are many things about the US that please me, not the least being freedom of speech.

But then the nutjobs open their mouths and it can be soooo embarrassing to be American.

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I have the same problem, with the added joy of the nutjob being someone I'm related to. My secret shame is the Tea Partiers in my family.

I take solace that my queer, Green Party votin', civil rights demandin', gender-role dismissin', ain't takin' no shit from anyone and that goes double for you, honored Grandfather, self is just as embarrassing to them as they are to me.

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Originally posted by Pigwidgeon in Heaven:
At a South American cathedral the congregation was singing enthusiastically before some major celebration started. I was sure they were singing "Huevos! Huevos! Huevos!" (i.e., "Eggs! Eggs! Eggs!"). It turns out the real words were "Fuego! Fuego! Fuego!" (i.e., "Fire! Fire! Fire!").

(I know just enough Spanish to be dangerous. At least I've never yelled "Huevos!" in a burning building.)

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