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Originally posted by Sandemaniac:
birdie, on the parenting thread:

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Originally posted by Spiffy:
Besides, my bosom is too beautiful to mar the view with hateful words.

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If we are reborn, I think many of us are still waving our fat little hands around and gurgling at the pretty shiny things hanging over the crib.

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I've always thought the US government views Britain the way you view that cute, fluffy, but rather too yappy small dog that embarrasses you by trying to jump up and lick your nuts when you take it out for a walk.

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that image just made my day!

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Evil Dragon Lady, Breaker of Men's Constitutions

"It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.” -Calvin

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meanwhile, I need to go finishing my encephalitic vacuuming before my perpendicular meeting at the astronomical cafe in a few rabbinical hours.

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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

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The idea that some toppings on pizza are "right" and some are "wrong" just makes no sense at all. Like God has a canonical list somewhere of proper pizza toppings -- the Ten Condiments. Oy.

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sometimes I'm so wonderful I make myself mildly ill.

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Originally posted by Chorister:
Carys, on the 'archaic but beautiful' thread (KJV), on how modern liturgy can be:

just a pooh trap for heffalumps

Wrestling with the modern Lord's Prayer each week, I know just what she means.

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Originally posted by Carys:
And the CinW 1984 is just a pooh trap for heffalumps because it's semi-modernised trad language so thee/thou are out and we have spirit not ghost but other bits are straight 1662 BCP.

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Originally posted by Chorister:
Firenze on the Inquire Within Question Thread:

If I catch any of you furgling a bogie, I'll mung your greebles quicker than you can say
'Gorsafawddachaidraigddanheddogleddollônpenrhynareur-draethceredigion'

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Or "Golf Halt", as that particular railway station has now been renamed

(to boldly go)

[ 19. January 2011, 14:53: Message edited by: Chorister ]

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Hail Gallaxhar

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I think I had the opposite problem of seeing so many colourful warnings about hell that I built it up in my mind as some terrifying and confusing forbidden place, when in reality it's just where people vent their anger and insult people.

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A most promising, relative newby.

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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

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Originally posted by lilBuddha:

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Originally posted by ken:
Where we were supposed to name all the animals but we just killed loads of them instead.

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Well, makes naming them a bit easier.

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Some things are just convenient and accurate shorthand rather than a diabolical plot.

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Originally posted by Firenze:

We like, I daresay, to think of our lives as a sort of rational osmosis, in which we encounter and absorb experience, learn from it, know ourselves to be wiser, more knowledgeable, more mature. But it's not. It is more a series of delusions and catastrophes, infatuations, mistakes and wrong turnings punctuated with a lot of two-in-the-morning's How could I have been so stupid?

But you get through, and realise how much was of your own choice (though you may not have realised it at the time). And true enough, other people behaved badly - but what really rankles is that you were so gullible.

So what I am hearing is the not unfamiliar note of humiliating self-knowledge. My advice would be to embrace your inner (as you feel it be) fool, for, believe me, you have no other self.

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Originally posted by Og, King of Bashan:
Part of incarnation was pooping. You can go see Jesus' Huggies in Dubrovnik if you'd like.

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Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
Wow, that there above was a deep insightful quote.

Here's mine:

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Originally posted by Og, King of Bashan:
Part of incarnation was pooping. You can go see Jesus' Huggies in Dubrovnik if you'd like.

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I am a Pharisee. I am a Sadducee. I am a feminist, man-hating whore. I am a walrus. Whatever. Believe it or not, my faith was not designed to pull the rug out from under you. It's simply me trying to be a disciple of Christ.

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Sure, you nail your colours to the mast, and that's no bad thing, but that's very different to hoisting the Jolly Roger which I feel you've done on this occasion.

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Just

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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!

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Originally posted by Think²:
In future, consider reading before posting - you may have noticed the OPer has disappeared and therefore you are casting your pearls before swine. Bored, angry, swine.

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Originally posted by Hart:
A gentleman never votes for himself. Therefore:

1. Hart...

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Originally posted by Spiffy:
Plants grow, change, and mature, and they somehow manage to do it while rooted in one spot.

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Originally posted by ken:
I am Marticus!

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orginally posted by IngoB:
I'm not being flippant either. We all are lurching toward salvation like a bunch of zombies, propelled by who knows what... The Holy Spirit it may well be, but I think the truth for many of us is that we neither feel particularly holy nor act so - and yet somehow we put one decaying foot in front of the other. What we claim as motivation is often a skin-deep mixture of self-images and learned religious or secular ideals. Bullshit we mumble to explain to ourselves the very weird fact that we are still going that way.

What is however true - for me, sometimes - is me kneeling in front of an icon of the BVM and praying, feeling the fear being sucked out of my lungs. What is true is my life changing suddenly and coherently, speaking very insistently to me about certain things without a single sound. What is true is having looked inside, silently, deeply, and finding something that was not empty (sorry, Siddhartha) and not material (sorry, Dawkins) - nothing special though, just me. God, I fear, is far to near.

To get back to the OP: All this ranting is really like holding your nose at all those zombies lurching past. You know what? We already knew that we stink. Really. But some of us have been bitten in the ass by true religion, the mark of Abel. When you are bitten too, we'll see your rotten flesh moving our way, some way. Brother.

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St Paul asserts that the post-resurrection body is a "spiritual body". I guess modern folk, having been brought up on the mindset of Cartesian duality, imagine that means the resurrection body is all foofy and ghosty and not quite there. But if you ignore Descartes (which I try to do at least four times a day), there's no reason to suppose that a spiritual body is necessarily an un-physical one.

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Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
Yeah. If I flush my wedding ring down a toilet, I'm sure as hell acting out a metaphore.

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Swear to Jesus, it's like all the kids today think it's cool to be strutting around wearing their asshats like they were crowns of glory.

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Hurricanes, blizzards and now two Lutherans posting here about their numinous experiences, it must be the Apocalypse!

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Originally posted by Wood:

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Originally posted by Chelley:
It seems to me that it's about trying to live out both 'loving God with heart, soul, mind and strength' and 'loving your neighbour as yourself' when some are most focused on the first to the detriment of the second and the other on the second to the detriment of the first.

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You mean they're different?

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[ Lamb Chopped]

[ 06. February 2011, 02:36: Message edited by: Kelly Alves ]

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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.

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I have this sinking feeling that G-d wants me to do something but I'm very unclear as to what. I'd kind-of like to tell G-d to just go away and leave me alone, but that generally just makes him bug me more. Annoying deity, that one.

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No, this acquaintance's stupid is all-natural, free range, 100% organic, no drugs or additional hormones added.

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Originally posted by RooK:


Part of my amusement ... has always been the assumption that he's posting whilst simultaneously sporting some rather fabulous head injury. Like, say, a scythe point protruding awkwardly from his left frontal lobe whilst the handle kinks over his right shoulder to lay along his (according to my vision) horrifically hunched back. The doctors all too baffled and frankly enthralled to try removing the thing, leaving the poor bastard with an improbable juxtaposition of gibberish and neuronic misfirings that happen to be in a lobe that generates a sense of certainty.

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I see NO theological necessity for Adam to be real or for the Flood to have happened as my alienation is mine. I couldn't care less how it happened, only that it is resolved in Christ Jesus, God becoming human.

However I do bow the knee to Eden, Adam and Eve and The Serpent being real. Just as Satan is now. It would be nothing for the Holy Spirit to preserve that truth through thousands of years of lost records.

Not that it matters. It does matter that any Christian says that it DOES one way or the other. The wooden and atheist materialist extremes that meet each other in being closed.

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Originally posted by Lynn MagdalenCollege:
It strikes me that this thread is a really good example of how some people are driven (either by wiring or inclination) to nail down every point and possibility and the result is, for example, the Talmud and the Mishnah because the Ten Commandments weren't enough and the 613 specified laws aren't enough because you really need to know exactly where the line is, either so you don't cross it or so you can do pirouettes on the line while blowing razzberries at The Authority Figure.

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And that's the point where the Holy Spirit has to step into the game, or possibly a shotgun...

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...I wish you'd stop quoting me to make your point, it's making me want to disagree with myself.

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I believe that God can, and will love the hell out of us,

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And nowadays, I don't post so much. But it is rock steady. And kind of like the bar in Cheers, I have a stool with a dent in it, I pushed Norm off it.

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'Cos, you know, the devil loves to attack people who serve coffee and cake.

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Originally posted by Fineline:
I find it's only when Christians can admit that they don't have all the right answers and that do make mistakes that I can see through them to God, if that makes sense. When they claim to represent God so completely then they completely obscure God - they get in the way.

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Originally posted by Spiffy:

I myself firmly believe that the awkward, tense feeling when you want to say something but just can't come up with the right stuff is the Holy Spirit slapping her beloved hand over your mouth before you say something really stupid.

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Originally posted by Isaac David:
Postmodernism is probably just an intellectually respectable label for adolescent apathy experienced by adults....

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Bring on the day when the last jargon-sodden therapist is strangled with the pickled guts of the last "non-directive counsellor" and all of them buried under a pyre of rotting pages from self-help books amd tabloid newspapers and women's magazines full of crap popular psychology and pseudo-scientific healthcare lies.

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Originally posted by Birdseye:

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Yeah, go Google "Generational Curse Deliverance". Basically, it says all our problems are because our ancestors were Very Naughty and if we break these generational curses, we'll be filthy rich and successful

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Ah, right I SEE:
"Fed up of carrying your cross?"

"Still washing your robes in the Blood of the Lamb?"

"Tough on the stains of sin, tough on the causes of stains of sin: New Persil Automatic Prayer... who needs Atonement when you can realise your own Eschaton!"

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