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» Ship of Fools   » Community discussion   » Purgatory   » Can the Queen disinvite Trump? (Page 3)

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Source: (consider it) Thread: Can the Queen disinvite Trump?
Stercus Tauri
Shipmate
# 16668

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Asking donald fart to eat haggis would be like asking a pig to eat pork. Too many similarities.

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Thay haif said. Quhat say thay, Lat thame say (George Keith, 5th Earl Marischal)

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Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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So Her Majesty won't be serving him haggis, then. What would be some good choices for the menu?

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"It used to be that being crazy meant something. But not anymore – nowadays everybody's crazy!" – Charles Manson

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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713

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quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
So Her Majesty won't be serving him haggis, then. What would be some good choices for the menu?

Would lampreys be a suitable dish? Nothing short of a surfeit naturally.

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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"

(Paul Sinha, BBC)

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Gamaliel
Shipmate
# 812

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quote:
Originally posted by L'organist:
posted by Carex
quote:
Of course he doesn't want to meet Charles - he doesn't have a hot wife.
Not true. While the Duchess of Cornwall may not be conventionally handsome, she has more sex-appeal in her little finger than the fragrant Duchess of Cambridge. Take it from me, flicky-hair does not a temptress make.
Bloody hell, L'Organist ... do we have to put up with your pervy letching?

I need some brain-suds to wash away the images you've conjured up.

I remember a work colleague asking how it was that the Prince of Wales could end up with someone who 'had a face like Iggy Pop's arse.'

To which another colleague responded, 'It could have been worse, she could have had a face like Iggy Pop's face ...'

[Ultra confused]

Well, actually ...

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Let us with a gladsome mind
Praise the Lord for He is kind.

http://philthebard.blogspot.com

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Eirenist
Shipmate
# 13343

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The Times recently had a brief report to the effect that the golf course at Balmoral is to be opened to the public. So there would be no way of keeping TD away, but anyong willing to pay the green fee would be able to go and watch him play.

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'I think I think, therefore I think I am'

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Barnabas62
Host
# 9110

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For any puzzled non UK Shipmates, the medieval King Henry 1 died of 'a surfeit of lampreys'.

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Who is it that you seek? How then shall we live? How shall we sing the Lord's song in a strange land?

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Jack the Lass

Ship's airhead
# 3415

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For the record, vegetarian haggis is delicious. I know it's not the real thing, and would never claim it was, but for those of us who don't eat meat it means we can still participate in the national dish. Plus we always have it for Christmas dinner in place of turkey - it goes perfectly with roast veg.

Re Trump coming to Scotland, it will just be yet another opportunity for some spectacular insults. If he'd gone to London I could imagine the protests consisting of turned backs (which I happen to think would be very effective against his fragile ego). Instead he'll just have to face some more creative wordplay.

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"My body is a temple - it's big and doesn't move." (Jo Brand)
wiblog blipfoto blog

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Enoch
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# 14322

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Prairie Pudding - an empty plate, i.e. miles and miles and miles of b*gg*r all.

Alternatively, tortillas of for that matter, anything Mexican. Or Bombe Surprise with a real bomb in it.

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Brexit wrexit - Sir Graham Watson

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Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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I had envisioned kilted Scotsmen turning and bending over with lifted hem, but I have a vivid imagination.

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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

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Ethne Alba
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# 5804

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Oh hells teeth ,can't we just totally ignore him?
No crowds protesting. Nothing at all.

Anything else, would ....absolutely.... be misinterpreted By Him.
And any travelling media.

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Alan Cresswell

Mad Scientist 先生
# 31

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He could be met by empty streets, with no one but his own staff there. Nothing to see but some wind turbines turning gracefully on the horizon.

But, he'd declare that he was warmly welcomed by crowds of people.

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Don't Brexit if you haven't a scooby how to fix it.

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Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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And when you showed photos or footage of the empty streets he would insist that the images had been doctored, or swapped or something. We here in the US have been there and done this. Subtle is utterly lost upon the Groper of Pussies. Please, UKians, come through with something brassy and bold. That he cannot ignore or spin. Or blame on Barack Obama. Be creative.

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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

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Gamaliel
Shipmate
# 812

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'UKians'? What's wrong with 'British'?

There are Canadians, not Canadish, Californians but not Californish ...

Bold and brassy? Well, we've got Barbara Windsor ...

But he'd probably like her. Ooh, Matron ...

I suppose a mass collective fart might be appropriate given that Trump is UK primary school slang for flatulence ...

It'd be nice to see something creative, placards and banners are sooooo 20th century ...

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Let us with a gladsome mind
Praise the Lord for He is kind.

http://philthebard.blogspot.com

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Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061

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Are there no =bagpipes=? C'mon, guys!

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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

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Augustine the Aleut
Shipmate
# 1472

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quote:
Originally posted by Gamaliel:
'UKians'? What's wrong with 'British'?
*snip*

Northern Ireland is the problematic factor.

British refers to people or things which are from (Great) Britain. UKian is the unfortunate but apt descriptor for the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

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Jack the Lass

Ship's airhead
# 3415

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
Are there no =bagpipes=? C'mon, guys!

He's made a big thing of being piped in when his golf course opened (google "bagpipes donald trump" and there are the images) and I think when he's got out of the plane too - that wouldn't ordinarily be offensive to him, regardless of what many people think of the dulcet tones of Scotland's instrument of war. However, I'm guessing this guy might not be exactly to his taste.

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"My body is a temple - it's big and doesn't move." (Jo Brand)
wiblog blipfoto blog

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Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by Gamaliel:
I suppose a mass collective fart might be appropriate given that Trump is UK primary school slang for flatulence ...

How about everyone in the crowd wearing these?

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Don't keep calm. Go change the world.

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Stercus Tauri
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# 16668

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He should be driven from the airport in a bus. I am sure he knows Margaret Thatcher's remark that, “A man who, beyond the age of 26, finds himself on a bus can count himself as a failure.” But he probably doesn't know what a bus is.

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Thay haif said. Quhat say thay, Lat thame say (George Keith, 5th Earl Marischal)

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Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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Is there local bus service from the airport to Balmoral? Preferably the type of bus where people get on with their goats and chickens (probably more common in other parts of the world than in Scotland). If he's lucky he might get a seat rather than having to stand in the aisle.

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Don't keep calm. Go change the world.

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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468

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Re bagpipes:

You could really surprise him with Japanese bagpipers. AIUI, that got started when a Japanese man heard bagpipes, and wept, because they reminded him of Japanese warrior tradition.

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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?"--Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon"
--"I'm not giving up--and neither should you." --SNL

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Gramps49
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# 16378

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Trump trashes NATO

Acts as a child at the G7

Picks a fight with Germany

Snubs the Paris Accords

Gets into a one-sided tweet storm with the Mayor of London. (who is now calling for the withdrawal of the invite)

Why would anyone want him to visit your great nation?

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Lyda*Rose

Ship's broken porthole
# 4544

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I wish he wouldn't visit ours, for say, four years.

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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

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Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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Why don't they simply change the locks on the White House doors the next time he leaves to go anywhere?

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"It used to be that being crazy meant something. But not anymore – nowadays everybody's crazy!" – Charles Manson

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Bishops Finger
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# 5430

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Well, he'd just carry on 'governing by Twitter' from Mar-a-Lago, or wherever he happens to be playing golf at the time.

I suppose we'll have to host the Orange Lord at some point, but not yet, please ...

IJ

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The future is another country - they might do things differently there...

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Ohher
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# 18607

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45 should visit Siberia. He should tour gulags, and wax Twitteretic in praise of the bigly security facilities there. He should enter into negotiations with the Kremlin over converting "political prisoner centers" into casino tourist traps and, in the dear old Yiddish curse, he should prosper and grow rich and buy a hotel with a thousand rooms and be found dead in every one of them.

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From the Land of the Native American Brave and the Home of the Buy-One-Get-One-Free

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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468

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Ohher--

Shhhh! He'll want to build his own greatest, bigliest gulags. Don't give him ideas!!

[Paranoid]

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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?"--Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon"
--"I'm not giving up--and neither should you." --SNL

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Bishops Finger
Shipmate
# 5430

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Ohher, thank you for that wonderful addition to the list of Yiddish curses upon The Trumpimple!

(May he burst, soonish, and very bigly.)

[Overused]

IJ

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The future is another country - they might do things differently there...

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cliffdweller
Shipmate
# 13338

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quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
Why don't they simply change the locks on the White House doors the next time he leaves to go anywhere?

I'd be willing to withdraw all my moral and ethical concerns with the travel ban if we could guarantee it would permanently bar ANYONE who'd visited a Muslim nation with a history of supporting terrorism in the prior 60 days.

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"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner

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Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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What's good for the goose . . . .

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"It used to be that being crazy meant something. But not anymore – nowadays everybody's crazy!" – Charles Manson

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cliffdweller
Shipmate
# 13338

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Britain's part of NATO-- and they tell me "an attack on one is an attack on all". Can't you detain him as a foreign operative who is in the process of attempting a coup on a NATO ally?

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"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner

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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468

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Cliffdweller--

Good. And find some reason for another country to drag him off to the criminal court in the Hague. Let him think it's an honor. (Of course, the US isn't a signatory to that court, so might not be possible.)

And if we could involve the fictional UN Center for Law and Enforcement, a la "The Man From UNCLE", then Ilya Kuryakin and Napoleon Solo could get into the game. Particularly appropriate, since they were into Cold War hijinx.
[Cool]

Hmmm...I wonder if the pope could persuade T that he really could use a long retreat...

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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?"--Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon"
--"I'm not giving up--and neither should you." --SNL

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Bishops Finger
Shipmate
# 5430

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I should think that, after meeting with Trumpimple, the Pope could do with a long retreat...

IJ

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The future is another country - they might do things differently there...

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cliffdweller
Shipmate
# 13338

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quote:
Originally posted by Bishops Finger:
I should think that, after meeting with Trumpimple, the Pope could do with a long retreat...

IJ

Or a long, long "silkwood" shower...

Yeah, retreats don't seem to be Donald's thing. Much better would be to invent some pseudo-religious Catholic honorific he needs to fly to Rome to receive-- "The Bigly Popist Medal of Bigliness." No need to make it sound real or use Latin-- the guy that has to ask if Presbyterians and evangelicals are "both Christians?" isn't likely to have a lot of detailed info on papal honors. Once he arrives at the ceremony a brief instruction in the ancient Christian tradition of humility will elucidate why this honor may not be all he expects.

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"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner

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Enoch
Shipmate
# 14322

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Could I put a question to USAnian Shipmates.

You've probably picked up that he's bigly unpopular over here.

However, as he's your President, even though many of you wish he wasn't, if the UK were to withdraw his invitation, would those of you who don't like him be sympathetic, or would your identification with your country cause you to feel this as an emotional affront to your country?

[ 08. June 2017, 16:37: Message edited by: Enoch ]

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Brexit wrexit - Sir Graham Watson

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Nicolemr
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# 28

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Personally I would be happy to see his invitation withdrawn. I don't see him in any way as representing my country, so an insult to him is not an insult to us.

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On pilgrimage in the endless realms of Cyberia, currently traveling by ship. Now with live journal!

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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528

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I think most of us (minus the diehard T supporters) agree he has it coming to him.

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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!

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Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by Enoch:
Could I put a question to USAnian Shipmates.

You've probably picked up that he's bigly unpopular over here.

However, as he's your President, even though many of you wish he wasn't, if the UK were to withdraw his invitation, would those of you who don't like him be sympathetic, or would your identification with your country cause you to feel this as an emotional affront to your country?

I would love England even more! I do identify with my country, but no way, no how do I identify with Trump. No sympathy from me.

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Don't keep calm. Go change the world.

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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468

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Enoch--

If his particular invitation is withdrawn, it needs to be made crystal clear that it's about *him*, not about the US. That would need to be said in words, not just implied.

I would probably have a knee-jerk response of being a little offended, but I'd deal with it. The big problem would be his supporters, and anyone else who took it as a slap in the face of the US, betrayal, rejection of "the special relationship", etc. The reaction would make the whole "not French fries, but *Freedom* fries" mess look like just flicking off a piece of lint.

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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?"--Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon"
--"I'm not giving up--and neither should you." --SNL

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stonespring
Shipmate
# 15530

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quote:
Originally posted by Enoch:
Could I put a question to USAnian Shipmates.

You've probably picked up that he's bigly unpopular over here.

However, as he's your President, even though many of you wish he wasn't, if the UK were to withdraw his invitation, would those of you who don't like him be sympathetic, or would your identification with your country cause you to feel this as an emotional affront to your country?

Part of me would cheer if he was disinvited, seeing how I view him as a quasi-fascist and a threat to democracy everywhere, but I doubt it would be helpful. It would only give more fuel to his supporters' fire and it would encourage the Putins and Erdogans of the world to disinvite any heads of state/government whose actions they disapproved of. Also, despite my just having called Trump a quasi-fascist, I do not think he is quite at the Hitler level of citizens-have-no-loyalty-to-him and all-nations-must-deny-him-any-recognition. So he does deserve to be treated with the respect due to a Head of State. Sadly, the exigencies of salvaging what hope is left for peace in the world also means that honoring the Special Relationship is also important, even if Trump has been bad mouthing allies left and right and not honoring our commitments to NATO.
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468

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I don't suppose Prince Charles could introduce T to a nice, big compost heap?

"Oh, goodness, did you fall in? Well, since you're in there, would you mind awfully turning the compost over? And when you're done and have cleaned up, I believe Camilla will have some warm scones and tea waiting. Darjeeling?"
[Snigger]

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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?"--Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon"
--"I'm not giving up--and neither should you." --SNL

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Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061

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You do not want to invite him. You do not want to see him. Preserve your own health, sanity, and morality. Do not worry about us, we're going to cope. Preserve yourselves.

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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

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Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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quote:
Originally posted by cliffdweller:
invent some pseudo-religious Catholic honorific he needs to fly to Rome to receive-- "The Bigly Popist Medal of Bigliness." No need to make it sound real or use Latin

But "Fortibus es in ero"* would be most appropriate.

_________________________

* For those who have never seen it:

O sibili si ergo,
Fortibus es in ero.
O nobili, demis trux.
Si vatis enim? Causan dux!

Don't attempt to translate -- simply read it literally.

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"It used to be that being crazy meant something. But not anymore – nowadays everybody's crazy!" – Charles Manson

Posts: 10292 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
cliffdweller
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# 13338

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quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
quote:
Originally posted by Enoch:
Could I put a question to USAnian Shipmates.

You've probably picked up that he's bigly unpopular over here.

However, as he's your President, even though many of you wish he wasn't, if the UK were to withdraw his invitation, would those of you who don't like him be sympathetic, or would your identification with your country cause you to feel this as an emotional affront to your country?

I would love England even more! I do identify with my country, but no way, no how do I identify with Trump. No sympathy from me.
I may be slightly miffed we don't get a short vacay as promised from the guy. I might try crying "no backsies!" But in the end I'd admit he's our problem so not fair to foist on you even if only for a few days. Sigh

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"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner

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Gwai
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Yeah, no loyalty to him. Despite all the literalists who keep explaining that he is our president, that's the real spirit of #notmypresident. Feel free to disinvite him.

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A master of men was the Goodly Fere,
A mate of the wind and sea.
If they think they ha’ slain our Goodly Fere
They are fools eternally.


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Ohher
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quote:
Originally posted by Enoch:
Could I put a question to USAnian Shipmates.

You've probably picked up that he's bigly unpopular over here.

However, as he's your President, even though many of you wish he wasn't, if the UK were to withdraw his invitation, would those of you who don't like him be sympathetic, or would your identification with your country cause you to feel this as an emotional affront to your country?



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From the Land of the Native American Brave and the Home of the Buy-One-Get-One-Free

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Ohher
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# 18607

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quote:
Originally posted by Enoch:
Could I put a question to USAnian Shipmates.

You've probably picked up that he's bigly unpopular over here.

However, as he's your President, even though many of you wish he wasn't, if the UK were to withdraw his invitation, would those of you who don't like him be sympathetic, or would your identification with your country cause you to feel this as an emotional affront to your country?

Sorry -- apparently my long absence has erased my small ability to manage how to post.

Frankly, I doubt 44.5's (Because, after all, he's only half-baked) supporters would give a hoot if Their Hero were disinvited. But I do think any actual disinvitation would have to be worded carefully. In fact, I think Her Majesty's government would be wise instead to offer, pre-visit, a detailed itinerary. These plans should include encounters with the various Scots folks outraged by the golf course up there; a great deal of walking to view assorted non-gold-colored historic interiors (no golf carts, sadly, available); encounters with extremely cultured representatives of the fine arts; encounters with the upper echelons of Oxbridge scholars, especially those studying and/or developing solutions for climate change; and so on. Utmost care must be taken to avoid meetings with anyone with whom the talking yam might have something in common.

As he seems to have a remarkably narrow range of interests -- beauty contests, real estate, and his public image -- it should be possible to keep him paralyzed with boredom for a fortnight or so should he accept, while providing him with ample motivation for declining the invitation.

I know Prince Philip is now retired, but surely a lengthy private meeting could be arranged, if the Prince is sufficiently well to offer a few of his famously offensive remarks.

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From the Land of the Native American Brave and the Home of the Buy-One-Get-One-Free

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Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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-MOST- crucially, no young women. Staid matrons of over sixty only. Warn them all to carry big handbags of heavy leather, and train them to hold the bags not over one arm, but in both hands positioned centrally. This is VERY important. If you want to weaponize them I suggest weighting the bags with a lump of lead, but as they are they will be the necessary shield.

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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

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Penny S
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quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
quote:
Originally posted by cliffdweller:
invent some pseudo-religious Catholic honorific he needs to fly to Rome to receive-- "The Bigly Popist Medal of Bigliness." No need to make it sound real or use Latin

But "Fortibus es in ero"* would be most appropriate.

_________________________

* For those who have never seen it:

O sibili si ergo,
Fortibus es in ero.
O nobili, demis trux.
Si vatis enim? Causan dux!

Don't attempt to translate -- simply read it literally.

My Dad's version had "pisan dux".

[ 09. June 2017, 14:53: Message edited by: Penny S ]

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Bishops Finger
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No, no - you can't put pisan dux together, or the dux would eat the pis....

IJ

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The future is another country - they might do things differently there...

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L'organist
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If Trump cannot be disinvited then the UK should respond in two ways. News coverage kept to the minimum and population of London ignoring presence of the petulant one.

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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet

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