Source: (consider it)
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Thread: What's changed?
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
Read that Brenda. Thanks for posting.
As someone with bi-polar disorder who knows people with bi-polar disorder, I don't dump friends for doing wrong. I try to pull them closer. Often guilt drives people away though. One friend who was jailed for fraud back in the 1980s took 30 years to come back. I'm glad he did. [ 14. November 2017, 21:24: Message edited by: simontoad ]
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Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096
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Posted
sorry, that thing about dealing with friends who do wrong is an utterly personal response and not in any way a recommendation or advice to others, or indeed a claim that the author's suggested way to proceed, which is to consider what value there is in the friendship, is wrong.
I'd go on, but it's a tangent.
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Posts: 1571 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
Brenda, thanks for that Scalzi link!
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Just for some balance: I know that boys and men are abused, too--and that's every bit as bad as when girls and women are abused.
I don't know what the current books are. But, back in the early '90s, there was a men's book called "Victims No Longer", by Mike Lew. IIRC, it was hailed as the first book for male survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Hopefully, there've been more books since then.
For women, try "The Courage To Heal", by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis. There's a main book, a workbook, and a couple of other related books. It's been through a couple of editions, and may still be in print. I highly recommend it.
Sorry, I don't know of resources for non-binary gendered folks, but there may will be some.
-------------------- Blessed Gator, pray for us! --"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon") --"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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anoesis
Shipmate
# 14189
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Brenda Clough: A useful but depressing question to contemplate is, have you ever viewed a penis that you didn't want/ask to see? I wonder if there are any women who can say no.
Me. I can say no. So there's at least one. Doesn't mean I haven't been groped/squeezed/frotted/leered at, at work and elsewhere. But no flashing, no pxts.
-------------------- The history of humanity give one little hope that strength left to its own devices won't be abused. Indeed, it gives one little ground to think that strength would continue to exist if it were not abused. -- Dafyd --
Posts: 993 | From: New Zealand | Registered: Oct 2008
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by anoesis: quote: Originally posted by Brenda Clough: A useful but depressing question to contemplate is, have you ever viewed a penis that you didn't want/ask to see? I wonder if there are any women who can say no.
Me. I can say no. So there's at least one. Doesn't mean I haven't been groped/squeezed/frotted/leered at, at work and elsewhere. But no flashing, no pxts.
I don’t know if this counts but I’ve been shown penises I didn’t want to see *then* (a boyfriend pushing me). I’ve had the other stuff, though, albeit not at work as much as elsewhere. Also, it doesn’t necessarily have to be *you* being targeted-it can make the whole environment feel toxic if that kind of stuff goes around unchecked. You have to constantly be on the defensive so you won’t be “next”.
-------------------- More where that came from Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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