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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Scene 2: Elizabeth has a Visitor
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
Thank you ma'ams.
<bows deeply and elegantly>
Is there a problem with something evil that you need help fighting?
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Musical Director
Nativity Play
# 3651
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Posted
Let's have a bit of The Philosophers' Drinking Song, eh? It seems the right time...
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ChrisT sez: *sigh* Let's take it once more from the top...
Posts: 284 | From: The Bandstand | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
Waves at Tealady...
Do you happen to have anything with peppermint, my good merchant?
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
After purchasing peppermint tea from the Tealady at an outrageous price, JK sprinkles it about the room to mask the smell of "sick pregnant lady".
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 6
Nativity Play
# 3709
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jedi Knight:
Waves at Tealady...
Do you happen to have anything with peppermint, my good merchant?
I think I've got a little schnapps here if you want it, kiddo. And, unlike the Tea Lady, the angels don't charge for the goodies!
Angel Chorus:
Oh, it's rum, rum, rum
that makes me want to hum,
on the farm, on the farm!
Oh, it's rum, rum, rum
that makes me want to hum,
on the Palestinian hillside farm!
![[Two face]](graemlins/scot_twoface.gif)
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Rossweisse // The few, the proud, the angelic
Posts: 133 | From: Heavenly Host clubroom | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fairy Godmother
Nativity Play
# 3695
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Musical Director:
Let's have a bit of The Philosophers' Drinking Song, eh? It seems the right time...
I knows the words to that one I does
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It could only be Nanny Ogg
Posts: 265 | From: Appearing in a pantomime near you | Registered: Dec 2002
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St. Elizabeth
Nativity Play
# 3679
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Posted
Everybody sing!
IIIII-mannuel Kant was a real pissant who was very rarely stable,
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggaw who could drink you under the table,
Davud Hume could outconsume Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel,
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine who was just as sloshed as Shlebel.
There's nothing Nietzche couldn't teach ya 'bout the raising of the wrist,
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.
John Stewart Mill, of his own free will, after half a pint of shanty was particularly ill.
Plato, they say, could stick it away, half a crate of whiskey every day!
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
And Hobbes was fond of his Dram.
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart:
"I drink, therefore I am."
Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed;
A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed.
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Elizabeth Anne, who will soon no longer live on Tenth Street.
Posts: 32 | From: Luke 1:42 | Registered: Dec 2002
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St. Elizabeth
Nativity Play
# 3679
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Posted
Oh, dear, that should read "beggar", not "beggaw" and "Schlegel", not "Shlebel". I blame the booze!
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Elizabeth Anne, who will soon no longer live on Tenth Street.
Posts: 32 | From: Luke 1:42 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fairy Godmother
Nativity Play
# 3695
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jedi Knight:
Thank you ma'ams.
<bows deeply and elegantly>
Is there a problem with something evil that you need help fighting?
You couldn't to owt about sheep could you?
The shepherds seem to have taken the night off
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It could only be Nanny Ogg
Posts: 265 | From: Appearing in a pantomime near you | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Peppermint... now that could sort out my indigestion. Yes, I have indigestion something wicked, oh jedi knight.
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Angel 6:
I think I've got a little schnapps here if you want it, kiddo. And, unlike the Tea Lady, the angels don't charge for the goodies!
Dear honorable angel! Many thanks! The tea was some help, but I do think the schnapps will work better.
Do you have...say...a gallon?
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Musical Director
Nativity Play
# 3651
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Posted
Ah, that was good! Any special requests, as we're in a 'drunken singing' type mood?
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ChrisT sez: *sigh* Let's take it once more from the top...
Posts: 284 | From: The Bandstand | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fairy Godmother
Nativity Play
# 3695
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Musical Director:
Ah, that was good! Any special requests, as we're in a 'drunken singing' type mood?
There's always the hedgehog song...
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It could only be Nanny Ogg
Posts: 265 | From: Appearing in a pantomime near you | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
JK lets two sotted pregnant ladies lean on hi/her strong shoulders. Walks them to the fine Natuzzi leather sofa with tufted arm rests.
Fairy Godmother, I can probably use something in my utility belt to "encourage" the sheep to go to pasture.
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Techie1
Nativity Play
# 3688
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Posted
Turns Elizabeth's mike waaaaay down.
<stage whisper> Hey Teacart Lady... Up here... I need something to cool off... these lights are HOT!
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seeing lights? hearing voices? i can help with that...mysticlisa
Posts: 18 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Excuse me, excuse me.
You seem to be forgetting that I am a sweet and innocent young thing, and there are children present. ![[Angel]](graemlins/angel.gif)
I think I should sing "Ickle Jesus, sweetly sleep".
And please would somebody take this needle out of my belly? Please?
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 6
Nativity Play
# 3709
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jedi Knight:
...Do you have...say...a gallon?
Sure, no prob!
(snaps angelic fingers; one of those water-cooler bottles of the finest peppermint schnapps magically appears)
Enjoy!
Angel Chorus:
Oh, it's wine, wine, wine
that makes me want to shine
on the farm, on the farm!
Oh, it's wine, wine, wine
that makes me want to shine
on the Palestinian hillside farm!
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Rossweisse // The few, the proud, the angelic
Posts: 133 | From: Heavenly Host clubroom | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
Is there anything to eat besides spam, spam, spam and I believe there are a couple more varieties of spam pizza?
Oh, and the Surgeon General says it's not wise to drink while pregnant.
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Stable Cat
Nativity Play
# 3657
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Posted
*stable cat enthusiastically joins in singing*
YOOOOOOWWWWWLLLLLL............
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nicolemrw says "meow!"
Posts: 85 | From: the stable | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
Thanks Angel 6! You are indeed a messenger from The Most High!
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 6
Nativity Play
# 3709
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Posted
(Noting that Evil Twin is gently snoring in the womb, Angel 6 carefully removes needle and patches BVM's belly. Then she flies carefully up to the light crew with lots of frosty lager -- the crew are always beer drinkers by choice. Flying back down to stage -- center front, of course -- she sings a surprisingly tender and frankly gorgeous rendition of "Still, still, still." Then she flies off to have a drink herself; she's earned it.)
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Rossweisse // The few, the proud, the angelic
Posts: 133 | From: Heavenly Host clubroom | Registered: Dec 2002
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St. Elizabeth
Nativity Play
# 3679
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jedi Knight:
Oh, and the Surgeon General says it's not wise to drink while pregnant.
America hasn't been invented yet! We don't need to listen to some "surgeon general"!
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Elizabeth Anne, who will soon no longer live on Tenth Street.
Posts: 32 | From: Luke 1:42 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 6
Nativity Play
# 3709
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Jedi Knight:
Thanks Angel 6! You are indeed a messenger from The Most High!
You know it, babe.
Shall we do something about that cat?
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Rossweisse // The few, the proud, the angelic
Posts: 133 | From: Heavenly Host clubroom | Registered: Dec 2002
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chief stage manager
Nativity Play
# 3658
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Posted
*pssst - hey, Angel 6 - the needle, the needle. Don't fly off with the amnio needle.. ![[Frown]](frown.gif)
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The original bessie rosebride.
Posts: 148 | From: stage left amongst the props | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
I keep forgetting, a Jedi sometimes sees the Future, the Past, old friends...long gone.
Here, kitty, kitty, kitty. You can have a nice home in the Jedi Temple...where you'll be appreciated!
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Sheep 3
Nativity Play
# 3663
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Posted
Baaaaaaa.
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jlg the sheep
Posts: 278 | From: lost in a pasture | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 6
Nativity Play
# 3709
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by chief stage manager:
*pssst - hey, Angel 6 - the needle, the needle. Don't fly off with the amnio needle..
Just having it sterilized -- here you go! Let me know when the ET (hmmm...) wakes up.
(Angel 6 tops off the glasses of the BVM and Elizabeth, and, faintly wondering how she turned into the Angel of the Spirits, as it were, gently flies off again.)
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Rossweisse // The few, the proud, the angelic
Posts: 133 | From: Heavenly Host clubroom | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Look, I don't like to be a party pooper, especially as I suppose this is really my party and all that, but I think I ought to go and get some sleep. I still feel a bit dodgy after all that spam, you know. Liz, have you got a room ready for me?
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
JK sits with Liz and Mary and pours a thimbleful of peppermint schnapps to enjoy...
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 6
Nativity Play
# 3709
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Virgin Mary:
...I think I ought to go and get some sleep. I still feel a bit dodgy after all that spam, you know. Liz, have you got a room ready for me?
Come along -- I'll tuck you in. Here, have some nice hot chocolate.
(Kicks sheep out of the bedroom, makes sure BVM is all comfy, turns down light, kicks sheep out again and locks door, with special anti-sheep device attached, behind her.)
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Rossweisse // The few, the proud, the angelic
Posts: 133 | From: Heavenly Host clubroom | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jesus' evil twin
Nativity Play
# 3702
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Posted
![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
*kick*
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Erin (of course)
Posts: 54 | From: my own room (finally!) | Registered: Dec 2002
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Sheep 3
Nativity Play
# 3663
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Posted
[Having been kicked for no reason at all, Sheep 3 exits stage left, looking for those nice dressing rooms.]
Baaaaaa.
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jlg the sheep
Posts: 278 | From: lost in a pasture | Registered: Dec 2002
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St. Elizabeth
Nativity Play
# 3679
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Posted
Good night, Mary!
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Elizabeth Anne, who will soon no longer live on Tenth Street.
Posts: 32 | From: Luke 1:42 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Turns over in her sleep so that the bulge which is Jesus's evil twin sister is squished firmly up against the ribcage and her feet, arms and head totally incapacitated
Hmmmmmmmmmmmm zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ![[Snore]](graemlins/snore.gif)
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jesus' evil twin
Nativity Play
# 3702
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Posted
Hey! I can't move! I guess I'll just have to keep myself entertained by singing.
Oh... ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall,
ninety-nine bottles of beer,
take one down,
pass it around,
ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall.
Ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall,
ninety-eight bottles of beeeeeeeerrrrrrrrr... ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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Erin (of course)
Posts: 54 | From: my own room (finally!) | Registered: Dec 2002
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Jedi Knight
Nativity Play
# 3686
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Posted
Well, Liz...since your cousin has gone to sleep, I'm sure you're ready to hit the sack as well.
I shall bid you adieu (literally), and remember, if your evil what-zis bothers you, just let me know, and I will do what I do best!
<deep Jedi bow>
JK exits stage left, taking schnapps along with...
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jj says-Don't y'all bad guys be messin' with those babies, now y'hear?
Posts: 61 | From: Fort Misery, Flour-dough | Registered: Dec 2002
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Techie1
Nativity Play
# 3688
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Posted
Lights out in three.... two... one...
Bzzzzzzzap!
<louder stage whisper>
Teacart Lady!!! Can I get a drink up here????
<mumbling to self> ...not appreciated.... just see how they like doing the @$%&* play in the dark... ![[Mad]](angryfire.gif)
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seeing lights? hearing voices? i can help with that...mysticlisa
Posts: 18 | Registered: Dec 2002
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chief stage manager
Nativity Play
# 3658
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Posted
Who issued the command the kill the lights? ![[Confused]](confused.gif)
No bother, It's way past my dinnertime, anyhow.
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The original bessie rosebride.
Posts: 148 | From: stage left amongst the props | Registered: Dec 2002
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St. Elizabeth
Nativity Play
# 3679
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Posted
Aaahh! Where are the lights? Oh, dear. What to do now?
[Takes out a well-concealed hip flask]
Well, hasn't this been a fun, boozy day? Now to partake in some gin.
[finishes it before anyone can steal it!]
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Elizabeth Anne, who will soon no longer live on Tenth Street.
Posts: 32 | From: Luke 1:42 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 3
Nativity Play
# 3687
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Posted
(At this point Angel 3 is lowered down from on high. She has thoroughly enjoyed singing about all of her favourite drinks with Angel 6 plus Hallelujah chorus and Philosopher's drinking song very loudly. But now comes a more reflective moment. Now it is time to sing a lullaby for the two drunken so...er, ladies reclining at her feet. The stage is dimmed, a spotlight shines on her, nicely picking up the highlights in her wings. With harp obbligato, she begins, to the tune of "Away in a manger".)
"Away with a Stranger - what do you expect?
It's nine months of nausea and
It's not over yet.
Her poor feet are hurting and her varicose veins
Look like a roadmap of the outskirts of Staines.
Away with a Stranger - it's really too sad!
She's carrying twins and
One of them's bad.
But one is our Saviour and so she should choose
To do the right thing and cut out the booze.
Away with a Stranger - it's really quite fun!
She's marrying Joseph and
Won't be a nun.
She can't wait for Christmas! From all of us here:
Glad tidings to all and Bee_of_Good_Cheer!"
(Well satisfied with her evening's singing, Angel 3 bows deeply to her wildly cheering audience. Bouquets rain down - she grabs a couple and flies off stage right.)
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The artist usually known as Duo Seraphim
"Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est."
Posts: 76 | From: Sydney, Australia | Registered: Dec 2002
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Musical Director
Nativity Play
# 3651
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Posted
*a hush descends over the audience, as a lone oboe picks its way tenderly through the melodious strains of 'Sweetness Follows' by REM to string accompianment ... the Musical Director slips off quietly clutching his usual bottle ...*
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ChrisT sez: *sigh* Let's take it once more from the top...
Posts: 284 | From: The Bandstand | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 6
Nativity Play
# 3709
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Techie1:
...Teacart Lady!!! Can I get a drink up here????...
For cryin' in a bucket, I flew all the way up there with an entire CASE of beer. What more do you want? (Flies up with an additional six-pack, mumbling about stagehands and their ilk.)
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Rossweisse // The few, the proud, the angelic
Posts: 133 | From: Heavenly Host clubroom | Registered: Dec 2002
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Chief Angel
Nativity Play
# 3706
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Posted
![[Embarrassed]](icon_redface.gif) *Chief Angel slopes onto the stage trying to look inconspicuous*
Sorry, am I a bit late?
*Looks around herself and sees BVM is sleeping*
*Sings a beautiful, soft lullaby to send the Evil Twin to sleep too*
*Exit CSL*
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WorkInProgress at her most angelic...
Posts: 42 | From: Heaven/Pantoland | Registered: Dec 2002
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Passer-by 3
Nativity Play
# 3711
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Posted
[Enter stage left. Exit stage right]
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(W)
Posts: 30 | From: The Wings | Registered: Dec 2002
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Chief Angel
Nativity Play
# 3706
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Posted
*Finding the lullaby didn't work, the Chief Angel tries to work out how to get something louder piped to the Evil Twin without disturbing the BVM* ![[Paranoid]](graemlins/paranoid.gif)
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WorkInProgress at her most angelic...
Posts: 42 | From: Heaven/Pantoland | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 6
Nativity Play
# 3709
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chief Angel:
*Finding the lullaby didn't work, the Chief Angel tries to work out how to get something louder piped to the Evil Twin without disturbing the BVM*
Try something stronger .
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Rossweisse // The few, the proud, the angelic
Posts: 133 | From: Heavenly Host clubroom | Registered: Dec 2002
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St. Elizabeth
Nativity Play
# 3679
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Posted
Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you're chewing your life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle,
And this'll help things turn out for the best,
And.....
Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling]
Always look on the light side of life.
[whistling]
If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle. That's the thing.
And...
Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistling] .........
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Elizabeth Anne, who will soon no longer live on Tenth Street.
Posts: 32 | From: Luke 1:42 | Registered: Dec 2002
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Sheep 3
Nativity Play
# 3663
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Posted
[Enters stage left, nibbles her way over to BVM's bedrom door, then stands, staring at door and chewing cud.]
Baa.
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jlg the sheep
Posts: 278 | From: lost in a pasture | Registered: Dec 2002
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Techie1
Nativity Play
# 3688
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Angel 6:
quote:
Originally posted by Techie1:
...Teacart Lady!!! Can I get a drink up here????...
For cryin' in a bucket, I flew all the way up there with an entire CASE of beer. What more do you want? (Flies up with an additional six-pack, mumbling about stagehands and their ilk.)
I am NOT a stagehand! I am a technician!
And besides... <mumbling> I couldn't find the beer in the dark... stupid primadona angel...
<lights slowly come back up>
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seeing lights? hearing voices? i can help with that...mysticlisa
Posts: 18 | Registered: Dec 2002
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