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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Scene 4: Meet Mary and Joseph
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chief stage manager
Nativity Play
# 3658
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Posted
sends more Pringles onstage....(fume) and it'll be me to clean up the sheep plop; seeing as how I still have no stage hands!
No, wait - I'll send out a mop and bucket to Joseph.. ![[Two face]](graemlins/scot_twoface.gif)
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The original bessie rosebride.
Posts: 148 | From: stage left amongst the props | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Virgin Mary:
Pretzels, sweetheart? I'll get them for you now, my dear. Let me put the radio back on for you... you're in time for the second half.
Oh, good.
Yawns. So tired... looks like this might be the kind of sleep featuring DREAMS.
![[Snore]](graemlins/snore.gif)
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Gently strokes Joseph's forehead to lull him to sleep and waves to attract the musical director's attention Golden Slumbers would be rather handy right now, or something like that, if you'd be so kind, Chris.
Hey, come on angels, I think this is your moment!
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Director
Nativity Play
# 3664
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by chief stage manager:
sends more Pringles onstage....(fume) and it'll be me to clean up the sheep plop; seeing as how I still have no stage hands!
No, wait - I'll send out a mop and bucket to Joseph..
Aha! You're getting the idea. Good, good! ![[Devil]](graemlins/devil.gif)
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Miffy
Posts: 109 | From: Her physiotherapist's couch | Registered: Dec 2002
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Musical Director
Nativity Play
# 3651
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Posted
*sings* Goodnight sweetheart, well it's time to goooo...
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ChrisT sez: *sigh* Let's take it once more from the top...
Posts: 284 | From: The Bandstand | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Musical Director:
*sings* Goodnight sweetheart, well it's time to goooo...
![[Ultra confused]](graemlins/confused2.gif)
Just as I was falling asleep, the most hideous sound... Mary! Check the cat's still alive!
Eesh. And what the heck's this bucket and mop for?
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fourth Angel
Nativity Play
# 3647
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Posted
*hovers over the radio before Joseph can get to it*
Oh cooo-eeee! Joooooooseph!
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From the goddess Inanna to the fourth angel from the left.
Posts: 62 | From: The Realms of Glory | Registered: Dec 2002
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Director
Nativity Play
# 3664
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Musical Director:
*sings* Goodnight sweetheart, well it's time to goooo...
Ooh! A duet?
Waltzes off into the wings with a beatific smile on her face, and Fairy Godmother's flask in one hand. A trail of pringle crumbs marks her route to the dressing room.
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Miffy
Posts: 109 | From: Her physiotherapist's couch | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
It's all right sweetheart... don't worry about it. You just go to sleep.
Whispered shout
Angels... now... it's your big moment...WHERE ARE YOU????
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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chief stage manager
Nativity Play
# 3658
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Posted
(pssst....hey, Joe - you're on cleanup detail for the stage area tonight. Sorry, just got here - no time to tell you before....
Heh, heh! ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
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The original bessie rosebride.
Posts: 148 | From: stage left amongst the props | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fourth Angel
Nativity Play
# 3647
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Posted
I'm here I'm here!
Oi, Joseph. Listen up a minute...
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From the goddess Inanna to the fourth angel from the left.
Posts: 62 | From: The Realms of Glory | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Fourth Angel:
*hovers over the radio before Joseph can get to it*
Oh cooo-eeee! Joooooooseph!
![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
What do you want, strange winged being?
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Third Singer
Nativity Play
# 3712
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Posted
Any ideas for a song? it's not to late for the backing vocals to the 'Magnificat?'
wanders off mumbling My soul doth proclaim the greantness of the Lord..................
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AKA Nightlamp
Posts: 7 | From: UK | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fourth Angel
Nativity Play
# 3647
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Posted
Umm... ummm.. *tries to remember lines. Flicks through Matthew*
Here we go. *ahem*
"Do not be afraid!" Except of the evil twin and the nasty Herod and his henchman. Oh, and possibly of the sheep too. Some of them look like they're verging on evil. And I'm sure that fairy godmother is up to no good either.
Oh. Sorry. "Do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife". That's better.
Does that help?
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From the goddess Inanna to the fourth angel from the left.
Posts: 62 | From: The Realms of Glory | Registered: Dec 2002
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Stable Cat
Nativity Play
# 3657
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Posted
*the singing and yelling have roused the sleeping cat, who decides to join in*
MMMEEEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!
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nicolemrw says "meow!"
Posts: 85 | From: the stable | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Fourth Angel:
"Do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife".
Does that help?
A bit of corroborative detail might be useful at this point, angel dear.
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Fourth Angel:
Umm... ummm.. *tries to remember lines. Flicks through Matthew*
Here we go. *ahem*
"Do not be afraid!" Except of the evil twin and the nasty Herod and his henchman. Oh, and possibly of the sheep too. Some of them look like they're verging on evil. And I'm sure that fairy godmother is up to no good either.
Oh. Sorry. "Do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife". That's better.
Does that help?
Yes.
Mary, my profoundest apologies. I have doubted the work of the Lord, and you, my dear wife-to-be. And in so doing, I have strayed from the path of righteousness...
etc. etc. etc.
Anyway, let's celebrate! What would you prefer, dear? Lamb or cat?
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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chief stage manager
Nativity Play
# 3658
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Stable Cat:
*the singing and yelling have roused the sleeping cat, who decides to join in*
MMMEEEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!
sends large fishing net (of course, why wouldn't a nativity play in fishing villages need one?) out between curtains lower stage left and traps that derned cat, but good!
Drags cat hissing and clawing backstage....
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The original bessie rosebride.
Posts: 148 | From: stage left amongst the props | Registered: Dec 2002
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Angel 3
Nativity Play
# 3687
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Posted
(Angel 3 enters and looks meaningfully at Angel 4. Time to take control.In her most severe tone she begins...)
Look here, toolboy, the word Angel means "messenger" as in "a word in your shell like from Him Upstairs".
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The artist usually known as Duo Seraphim
"Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est."
Posts: 76 | From: Sydney, Australia | Registered: Dec 2002
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chief stage manager
Nativity Play
# 3658
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Posted
Either lamb or cat could be nicely microwaved in minutes. Just tell me whether to skin or sheer....
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The original bessie rosebride.
Posts: 148 | From: stage left amongst the props | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fourth Angel
Nativity Play
# 3647
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Posted
Oh well that was awfully easy. ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif)
I was hoping to have to do that nice glowy thing they use on Touched By an Angel and all..
Still, as long as Joseph's convinced...
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From the goddess Inanna to the fourth angel from the left.
Posts: 62 | From: The Realms of Glory | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
Oh, do the glowy thing too!
Go on!
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Oooh, yes. Do the glowy thing.
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Stable Cat
Nativity Play
# 3657
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Posted
*stable cat, thoroughly enraged, shreds the net easily, and escapes back on-stage with a mighty leap that takes her solidly on top of the angel's head*
MMMMRRRRROOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!!
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nicolemrw says "meow!"
Posts: 85 | From: the stable | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fourth Angel
Nativity Play
# 3647
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Angel 3:
Look here, toolboy, the word Angel means "messenger" as in "a word in your shell like from Him Upstairs".
What, a cherub can't improvise occasionally? Besides, it did the job, didn't it?
Seeing as you're here, shall we do an angelic duet? The Cherry Tree carol might be apt?
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From the goddess Inanna to the fourth angel from the left.
Posts: 62 | From: The Realms of Glory | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fairy Godmother
Nativity Play
# 3695
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Posted
From wings loudly
For goodness sakes do the glowy thing and get it over with
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It could only be Nanny Ogg
Posts: 265 | From: Appearing in a pantomime near you | Registered: Dec 2002
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Musical Director
Nativity Play
# 3651
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Posted
Found a perfect song for this juncture:
'I Want To Kill Your Cat' by Gary Geniesse. See the lyrics right here!
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ChrisT sez: *sigh* Let's take it once more from the top...
Posts: 284 | From: The Bandstand | Registered: Dec 2002
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Stable Cat
Nativity Play
# 3657
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Posted
*since the angel doesn't seem to object to her presence, the stable cat curls up on the angels head and settles down for a nap*
puuuuurrrrrrr...........
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nicolemrw says "meow!"
Posts: 85 | From: the stable | Registered: Dec 2002
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chief stage manager
Nativity Play
# 3658
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Stable Cat:
*stable cat, thoroughly enraged, shreds the net easily, and escapes back on-stage with a mighty leap that takes her solidly on top of the angel's head*
MMMMRRRRROOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!!
you're not taking creative liberties with me! No straggly barn cat can possibly claw her way through one of Nazareth's finest fishing nets! They catch oyster toads in 'em and their teeth will chew open an oyster shell - and they can't hack their way through this netting.
Ha! Captured you again. There's a nice four point restraint for you backstage....nice kitty!
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The original bessie rosebride.
Posts: 148 | From: stage left amongst the props | Registered: Dec 2002
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Stable Cat
Nativity Play
# 3657
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Posted
*stable cat shreds stage manager's net, and, incidentally, the stage manager as well, escaping handily. she then stalks off in a huff*
hhhhhcckkkkkkppppfffttttt........
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nicolemrw says "meow!"
Posts: 85 | From: the stable | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fourth Angel
Nativity Play
# 3647
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Posted
With a contended smile, the fourth angel begins to glow radiantly. So radiantly that it'll dislodge any felines hanging around. Forget a halo, she looks like she's been eating ready-brek for the past decade. Or visiting Sellafield. Or something.
A golden aura surrounding her, she smiles sweetly at Joseph and Mary. Her voice softens to an Irish lilt. "I'm an angel. And I'm here t'say that the Father loves you soooo much."
*turns glow off*.
There ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif) ![[Angel]](graemlins/angel.gif)
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From the goddess Inanna to the fourth angel from the left.
Posts: 62 | From: The Realms of Glory | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Applauds
Oh, very good!
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Musical Director
Nativity Play
# 3651
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Fourth Angel:
...Her voice softens to an Irish lilt. "I'm an angel. And I'm here t'say that the Father loves you soooo much."...
Time for the Father Ted theme?
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ChrisT sez: *sigh* Let's take it once more from the top...
Posts: 284 | From: The Bandstand | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
That was impressive!
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fourth Angel
Nativity Play
# 3647
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Posted
*curtsies modestly*
Thank you. I taught that Roma Downey all she knows about glowing.
Not sure about Father Ted though...
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From the goddess Inanna to the fourth angel from the left.
Posts: 62 | From: The Realms of Glory | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fairy Godmother
Nativity Play
# 3695
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Posted
Here kitty kitty - are they being horrid to you?
Come to Fairy Godmother - puss puss puss
Would you like some fresh milk with whiskey?
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It could only be Nanny Ogg
Posts: 265 | From: Appearing in a pantomime near you | Registered: Dec 2002
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Sheep 3
Nativity Play
# 3663
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Posted
[Sheep 3 enters LSR, comes to a stop in front of Fourth Angel and chews her cud while contemplating the contended smile.]
Baa.
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jlg the sheep
Posts: 278 | From: lost in a pasture | Registered: Dec 2002
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chief stage manager
Nativity Play
# 3658
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Posted
*calmly attends to a couple of minor superficial scratches inflicted by Stable Cat. A little antiseptic is enough. No need for a Mr Men plaster, at all. That cat is a wuss.*
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The original bessie rosebride.
Posts: 148 | From: stage left amongst the props | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Fairy Godmother:
Would you like some fresh milk with whiskey?
Whiskey is not for cats. It's for humans. To demonstrate this, I shall now proceed to drink all your whiskey.
*glug*
*glug*
*glug*
*glug*
*glug*
*glug*
*glug*
*glug*
*glug*
Dash beddah.
*hic*
Wheresh Mary gone?
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Er.... I'm here, sweetie.
Wonders whether it might have been a better idea to exit stage left while the going was good
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
Oh goody goodsh. Whash are we going to call dish liddle babby, den? Ish he going to be a Joe like me? Or do we have to call him shomeshing religioush?
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Fourth Angel
Nativity Play
# 3647
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Posted
The Fourth Angel, no longer glowing, shoves the sheep offstage with a hefty push, before turning back to Joseph with her sweetest smile.
You've got to call him Jesus. At least that's what God said. I suggested Emannuelle for the other one, seeing as God seems to have said to call him that as well. But nobody appears to have picked up on that.
He could always be Jesus Joe?
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From the goddess Inanna to the fourth angel from the left.
Posts: 62 | From: The Realms of Glory | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Well, I had thought of Engelbert, but apparently we've got to go for the name Jesus. God insisted on choosing, seeing as it was his son. Seems fair enough, I suppose.
And as for this evil twin sister, someone suggested Emanuelle, though I'm a bit worried about the implications of that. I rather like the name Lavinia. What do you think?
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
I shink the evil one should be called Anne! After my mother-in-law!
Geddit? Haw! Haw! Haw!
How about "Karen"? Then she could grow up in my trade and be Karen Carpenter!
Geddit? Haw! Haw! Haw!
Taps Mary's pregnant bump and laughs loudly in its direction.
Do you hear that, kidsh? Haw! Haw! Haw! I'm a comedian! Haw! Haw! Haw!
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
The BVM gets up serenely and waves surreptitiously to the tealady Better make that one very strong coffee, please. Put it on the tab.
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Mrs. Herod
Nativity Play
# 3681
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Posted
Where's that cat? Herod loves chat a la whiskey! I knew that evilhench man would come in handy! Hey take care of the cat can ya love, then take it to the cook thanks yer a darlin'
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Jemmi
Posts: 4 | From: The Palace | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
Hmph.
I don't feel so good. ![[Embarrassed]](icon_redface.gif)
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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Virgin Mary
Nativity Play
# 3653
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Posted
Oh, will you look at the time, Joe dear. A Virgin most pure such as I am needs her beauty sleep, you know. No, don't worry, I can get my own coat, you just sit there comfortably and I'll be round tomorrow to clean up the Pringle crumbs.
Hmmm... now, that's Joseph convinced.... but I don't think Mum's going to be that easy somehow.....
Serenely exits stage left, followed by a sheep
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Can you have a white wedding in blue?
(Smudgie)
Posts: 287 | From: Down the road from the carpenter's shop, Nazareth | Registered: Dec 2002
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Musical Director
Nativity Play
# 3651
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Posted
Hey Joe, fancy hitting the bars downtown? I've got a song we can sing!
'Hey Bartender' by the Blues Brothers
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ChrisT sez: *sigh* Let's take it once more from the top...
Posts: 284 | From: The Bandstand | Registered: Dec 2002
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Joseph
Nativity Play
# 3666
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Virgin Mary:
Serenely exits stage left, followed by a sheep
Wow, doesn't take much to fool her, does it? Time to head down the King Herod's Arms, methinks...
Women!
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
Exit stage right.
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Joseph, the not-so-Jesuitical ex-Lad.
Posts: 177 | From: Palestine | Registered: Dec 2002
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