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Source: (consider it) Thread: Mansplaining
Ohher
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# 18607

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quote:
Originally posted by jbohn:
I once had the sublime experience of standing on deck aboard a schooner, listening to a man with a degree in Physics explain to the captain of said schooner how tacking into the wind isn't actually possible - while she was doing it... [Ultra confused]

Less sublime, I admit, but I once had the exquisite pleasure of accepting in person a Reader's Choice Award sent through the mail to Mr. X. Y. Ohher from a major science fiction magazine.

--------------------
From the Land of the Native American Brave and the Home of the Buy-One-Get-One-Free

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lilBuddha
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quote:
Originally posted by RooK:
quote:
Originally posted by lilBuddha:
Well, an electric Porsche will result in fewer over-priced parts to pay for, so that is a plus.
Electric, really? I though we were talking about cars and driving.

Oh, I see. You've never had the Porsche experience. Or a real electric drive experience. That's the only explanation I can see for the massive bout of carsplaining you're begging for.

'90's Porsche, but still a Porsche. Meh. I've heard the newer ones are better, but no one is willing to let me drive theirs.
I've no doubt the Porsche electric would be a fun vehicle. But it is just too close to being one of these.

--------------------
So goodnight moon, I want the sun
If it's not here soon, I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say goodnight moon

- A. N. Parsley, D. Mcvinni

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Rowen
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HIM, ernest clergyman: "Ah, Rev Rowen... I am so pleased to be here at your induction service. I am also a minister in your denomination, from several parishes over. This is a big event for you. Ministry must be very exciting for you. And confusing. You will soon get the hang of it. I have been a minister now for six years, so if you need advice , come and see me. Your first task here will be to meet the people and learn their names... So, been a minister long?""

ME, the woman clergy: "27 years."

I labeled it as mansplaining in my head....

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"May I live this day… compassionate of heart" (John O’Donoghue)...

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Lamb Chopped
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Phone rings.
"May i speak to Dr. Lamb, please?"
"Speaking. How may i help you?"
(Condescendingly) "No, i meant DOCTOR Lamb."
(With an edge in my voice) "SPEAKING. HOW MAY I HELP YOU?"
"I mean REVEREND Dr. Lamb."
"This is Dr. Lamb. I will be happy to get Rev. Lamb for you now."

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

--------------------
Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!

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Golden Key
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# 1468

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The incidents in the previous two posts are edging towards "Who's On First?" (MetroLyrics).

Audio and video here.


--------------------
Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

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mousethief

Ship's Thieving Rodent
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quote:
Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
Phone rings.
"May i speak to Dr. Lamb, please?"
"Speaking. How may i help you?"
(Condescendingly) "No, i meant DOCTOR Lamb."
(With an edge in my voice) "SPEAKING. HOW MAY I HELP YOU?"
"I mean REVEREND Dr. Lamb."
"This is Dr. Lamb. I will be happy to get Rev. Lamb for you now."

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

<confused coquette voice> The Reverend Doctor Lamb? There is no person with that title at this number. Please call again. <click>

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“Religion doesn't fuck up people, people fuck up religion.”—lilBuddha

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Sioni Sais
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quote:
Originally posted by mr cheesy:
quote:
Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
I did coin the term Saisbonio* to describe the phenomenon of an Englishman telling a Welshman why he's wrong about Wales, Welsh culture or the language.

*From Sais - Englishman, and Esbonio, to explain.

In the Welsh Assembly that's simple known as "Neil Hamilton"
All true. Quick and near-certain route to the Promised land.

--------------------
"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"

(Paul Sinha, BBC)

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North East Quine

Curious beastie
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I used to watch crap TV (home makeover shows etc) whilst ironing my husband's shirts. He used to explain that I'd rot my brain watching such rubbish, and say that he would never risk his own mighty brain by watching inane T.V. Eventually I realised that I was losing my husband's respect by watching mindless drivel whilst ironing his shirts. But I knew that I was incapable of watching anything intellectually challenging and ironing at the same time.

So I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem. [Disappointed]

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Golden Key
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# 1468

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NEQ--

ROTFL! Well done!

--------------------
Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

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cliffdweller
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# 13338

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quote:
Originally posted by North East Quine:
I used to watch crap TV (home makeover shows etc) whilst ironing my husband's shirts. He used to explain that I'd rot my brain watching such rubbish, and say that he would never risk his own mighty brain by watching inane T.V. Eventually I realised that I was losing my husband's respect by watching mindless drivel whilst ironing his shirts. But I knew that I was incapable of watching anything intellectually challenging and ironing at the same time.

So I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem. [Disappointed]

Love the sass, but I am curious-- what is this "ironing" of which you speak?

--------------------
"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner

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Golden Key
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# 1468

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Perhaps it involves rolling clothing into a tight little ball, and hitting it with a golf club/iron?

--------------------
Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

Posts: 18506 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Sioni Sais
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# 5713

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quote:
Originally posted by cliffdweller:
quote:
Originally posted by North East Quine:
I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem. [Disappointed]

Love the sass, but I am curious-- what is this "ironing" of which you speak?
It's derived from "irony", you know, that weird British thing.

--------------------
"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"

(Paul Sinha, BBC)

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The Intrepid Mrs S
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SS [Killing me]

--------------------
Don't get your knickers in a twist over your advancing age. It achieves nothing and makes you walk funny.
Prayer should be our first recourse, not our last resort
'Lord, please give us patience. NOW!'

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cliffdweller
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# 13338

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quote:
Originally posted by Sioni Sais:
quote:
Originally posted by cliffdweller:
quote:
Originally posted by North East Quine:
I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem. [Disappointed]

Love the sass, but I am curious-- what is this "ironing" of which you speak?
It's derived from "irony", you know, that weird British thing.
well done.
[Overused]

--------------------
"Here is the world. Beautiful and terrible things will happen. Don't be afraid." -Frederick Buechner

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Leaf
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# 14169

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quote:
Originally posted by North East Quine:
I stopped ironing his shirts.

His mighty brain had genuinely not anticipated that as a solution to the problem. [Disappointed]

[Overused] [Axe murder]
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Rossweisse

High Church Valkyrie
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quote:
Originally posted by cliffdweller:
Love the sass, but I am curious-- what is this "ironing" of which you speak?

I regard wrinkles as a fashion statement. (You are free to decide for yourself just what that statement might be.)

--------------------
I'm not dead yet.

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mrs whibley
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I'm grateful for the opportunity to commit my very favourite mansplain to pixels.

A former boss was older, more experienced and in some areas more knowledgeable than I. He spent a lot of time explaining things, and even when we got to those subjects where I was on familiar ground, I usually took the Boogie route and just smiled and nodded. A Lot.

I am over 40 and, this is relevant, have lived all my life in the UK.

Late last September, he said the following to me:
'Oh, it's coming up to that time of year again when it will be getting dark in the late afternoons. But you'd know that; you were here last year.'
I nodded. And smiled.

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I long for a faith that is gloriously treacherous - Mike Yaconelli

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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096

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[Killing me]

I'm afraid I began to mansplain the movement of the sun each afternoon to my wife last night, in the context of describing my gardening choices. She looked up at me with my metaphorical pipe in my mouth and said something like "Does it? Does the sun really move like that? Wow."

Project Toad continues.

--------------------
Human

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Eliab
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My daughter (aged 9 at the time - so y'all will sympathise with what I have to deal with) came up with the word "factulent" for the practice of passing information in the uncontrolled and unwelcome manner of one passing wind.

If she wants to know what a word means, and I tell her, that's fine. If I go on to tell her that it comes from the Latin or Norse word for ... "Dad's being factulent again!"


I prefer that to "mansplaining". More insulting and less sexist.

--------------------
"Perhaps there is poetic beauty in the abstract ideas of justice or fairness, but I doubt if many lawyers are moved by it"

Richard Dawkins

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M.
Ship's Spare Part
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That is an incredibly useful, pithy and generally wonderful, addition to the English language and I am going to start using it, with proper acknowledgement, immediately.

I've always hated the word mansplaining because it is so unpleasantly sexist.

M.

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Brenda Clough
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You hire a press flack as you hire a lawyer -- someone to be your spokesman. What they themselves believe in their heart is irrelevant. If you don't want to defend a murderer, you can decline the case. She decided to work for Lyin' Don of her own free will, knowing (from plentiful recent examples) that associating with him is like touching tar, blackening a person beyond cleansing. She knew that once Sean Spicer was a decent human being. She saw the awful fate of Chris Christie. She signed on anyway.

--------------------
Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

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balaam

Making an ass of myself
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Posted that on the right thread, Brenda?

(Was that factulent enough for you?)

--------------------
To learn which questions are unanswerable, and not to answer them: this skill is most needful in times of stress and darkness.”
― Ursula K. Le Guin
blog

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Anselmina
Ship's barmaid
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quote:
Originally posted by M.:


I've always hated the word mansplaining because it is so unpleasantly sexist.

M.

Ditto 'old wives' tales'? [Big Grin] I always felt this was essentially a sexist term, but yet somehow did describe a well-established human practice of folk-loric style of wisdom, probably inaccurate and not much to be trusted.But ruined because of its implied association with elderly women!

--------------------
Irish dogs needing homes! http://www.dogactionwelfaregroup.ie/ Greyhounds and Lurchers are shipped over to England for rehoming too!

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lilBuddha
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quote:
Originally posted by M.:
That is an incredibly useful, pithy and generally wonderful, addition to the English language and I am going to start using it, with proper acknowledgement, immediately.

I've always hated the word mansplaining because it is so unpleasantly sexist.

M.

Someone who mansplains is sexist, Someone who accuses a man of mansplaining simply because they are man is sexist; the term mansplaining itself is not.

--------------------
So goodnight moon, I want the sun
If it's not here soon, I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say goodnight moon

- A. N. Parsley, D. Mcvinni

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Nick Tamen

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quote:
Originally posted by Anselmina:
Ditto 'old wives' tales'? [Big Grin] I always felt this was essentially a sexist term, but yet somehow did describe a well-established human practice of folk-loric style of wisdom, probably inaccurate and not much to be trusted.But ruined because of its implied association with elderly women!

I am reminded of the words of Gandalf (or maybe it’s Aragorn—I forget which): “Pay heed to the tales of old wives. It may well be that they alone keep in memory what it was once needful for the wise to know.”

--------------------
The first thing God says to Moses is, "Take off your shoes." We are on holy ground. Hard to believe, but the truest thing I know. — Anne Lamott

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agingjb
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"Factulent" goes with "swallowed the dictionary" and "too much information" as proper dismissals of unwelcome expressions of knowledge and intelligence.

--------------------
Refraction Villanelles

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simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
You hire a press flack as you hire a lawyer -- someone to be your spokesman. What they themselves believe in their heart is irrelevant. If you don't want to defend a murderer, you can decline the case. She decided to work for Lyin' Don of her own free will, knowing (from plentiful recent examples) that associating with him is like touching tar, blackening a person beyond cleansing. She knew that once Sean Spicer was a decent human being. She saw the awful fate of Chris Christie. She signed on anyway.

One of the most childish ways to insult someone is to deliberately get their name wrong. Like Sarah Suckerbee-Handers.

--------------------
Human

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Leorning Cniht
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quote:
Originally posted by agingjb:
"Factulent" goes with "swallowed the dictionary" and "too much information" as proper dismissals of unwelcome expressions of knowledge and intelligence.

What is this "unwelcome expressions of knowledge" concept of which you speak?
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agingjb
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quote:
Originally posted by Leorning Cniht:
quote:
Originally posted by agingjb:
"Factulent" goes with "swallowed the dictionary" and "too much information" as proper dismissals of unwelcome expressions of knowledge and intelligence.

What is this "unwelcome expressions of knowledge" concept of which you speak?
That attitude displayed by people who use phrases like "swallowed the dictionary then", I have encountered it; too often.

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Refraction Villanelles

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M.
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# 3291

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No, lilBuddha, I think the term itself is sexist. It suggests it is something men do.

Some men do. So do some women.

M.

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Dafyd
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# 5549

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quote:
Originally posted by Eliab:

I prefer that to "mansplaining". More insulting and less sexist.

It's a different activity. If you or I were ever to meet Mary Beard in the unlikely event that we knew some piece of information about the classical world that she didn't know it is unlikely she'd think it factulent. For just that reason it would be easy to mansplain.

While I assume it's possible to be factulent and wrong, I assume factulency is more likely from people with justified confidence in their accuracy. The reverse is true of mansplaining.
The men who informed Beard over the internet that there were no people of African ancestry were in no sense factulency but we're mansplaining.

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we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams

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Jane R
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M.:
quote:
I've always hated the word mansplaining because it is so unpleasantly sexist.
You have obviously never been a woman in the position of having a man explain something that she already knows (better than he does) to her.

THAT is what mansplaining is. It may be unpleasantly sexist to be accused of it, but it is nowhere near as unpleasant as being on the receiving end of it.

Factulence (= giving more detail than required in an answer to a question) is something anyone can be guilty of.

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M.
Ship's Spare Part
# 3291

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But anyone can be guilty of that, JaneR. Calling it 'mansplaining' suggests it's exclusive to men.

M.

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Anselmina
Ship's barmaid
# 3032

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But calling it 'mansplaining' might be because it IS a man doing it? And some men do it, in the way they do, because they ARE men talking to the little woman who needs to be informed where she's going wrong because her little female brain just can't get a handle on the topic.

So if I say 'Jack condescendingly lectured me on something I already knew' I'm saying, Jack, as we all know speaks like that to everyone. But if I say 'Jack mansplained where I had gone wrong, in his opinion', I'm saying something additional, about Jack's attitude towards women, and the way he specifically addresses them?

Yes, some women do that too, to men. Womensplaining then? Or was that what the words 'nagging' 'hen-pecked' 'hag-ridden' 'under the thumb' were invented for?

What a minefield language is!

--------------------
Irish dogs needing homes! http://www.dogactionwelfaregroup.ie/ Greyhounds and Lurchers are shipped over to England for rehoming too!

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lilBuddha
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# 14333

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quote:
Originally posted by M.:
But anyone can be guilty of that, JaneR. Calling it 'mansplaining' suggests it's exclusive to men.

M.

Anyone can do any behaviour, but there are behaviours that are more prevalent in certain groups. Next you will claim that sexism doesn’t exist or that it is equally applied by men and women. Does the M stand for Murdoch?

--------------------
So goodnight moon, I want the sun
If it's not here soon, I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say goodnight moon

- A. N. Parsley, D. Mcvinni

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Doc Tor
Deepest Red
# 9748

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A case in point. Over on FB, I was sciencing in a friend's thread, when someone else I didn't know scienced also. I interpreted her sciencing, but when she said she was an astrophysicist, I apologised for trying to explain her subject straight away, introduced myself as a geophysicist and we had a good conversation about mutual sciencing.

This is how adults behave. Anything less is sub-optimal.

[ 15. December 2017, 13:41: Message edited by: Doc Tor ]

--------------------
Forward the New Republic

Posts: 9090 | From: Ultima Thule | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged
Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528

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quote:
Originally posted by M.:
But anyone can be guilty of that, JaneR. Calling it 'mansplaining' suggests it's exclusive to men.

M.

Anyone CAN be guilty of that, but my experience suggests it happens far more often with a single gender. (Possibly because women trying it get sat on, really HARD and quickly.)

So the question becomes, is it okay to name a bad behavior for a gender when the incidence is something like 97% (wild guess)?

Like calling street cat-calling "man-fuckwittery" or similar.

--------------------
Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!

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Rossweisse

High Church Valkyrie
# 2349

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A discussion of manspreading on Facebook brought up the same objections of sexism, although, in my experience, it, too, is an overwhelmingly male practice. I suggested calling it "jerkspreading" instead, and the fellows still grumped. From their reactions (one asked "What about big purses taking up seats?", to which I responded, "Put them on your laps" to general male silence), I suspect that they are themselves manspreading practitioners.

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I'm not dead yet.

Posts: 15049 | From: Valhalla | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged
Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549

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quote:
Originally posted by Rossweisse:
A discussion of manspreading on Facebook brought up the same objections of sexism, although, in my experience, it, too, is an overwhelmingly male practice.

I've never been manspread at by a woman.

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we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams

Posts: 10533 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528

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IME we are rigorously drilled in not displaying our bits (as we would in short skirts etc)

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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!

Posts: 20051 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by Lamb Chopped:
IME we are rigorously drilled in not displaying our bits (as we would in short skirts etc)

Even women wearing slacks or jeans don't tend to do that. But it's often happened to me in theaters -- by men, of course.

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Don't keep calm. Go change the world.

Posts: 9755 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Rossweisse

High Church Valkyrie
# 2349

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quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
Even women wearing slacks or jeans don't tend to do that. But it's often happened to me in theaters -- by men, of course.

It happens to me everywhere. I've started bumping them back when they do it, figuring I'm too little for them to slug.

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I'm not dead yet.

Posts: 15049 | From: Valhalla | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by Rossweisse:
It happens to me everywhere. I've started bumping them back when they do it, figuring I'm too little for them to slug.

Maybe it's time for women to start wearing nice long hat pins again... a swift jab in an offending leg might do the trick.

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Don't keep calm. Go change the world.

Posts: 9755 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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Knitting needles are good too.

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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

Posts: 6227 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged
M.
Ship's Spare Part
# 3291

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Blimey. Perhaps I've been lucky in my choice of men friends.

Perhaps I've put people down better.

But fine, let's disagree, because I just can't be arsed.

M. (Murdoch, apparently)

Posts: 2298 | From: Lurking in Surrey | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
simontoad
Ship's Amphibian
# 18096

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I remember one manspreading woman really well. I liked her instantly when I saw her and listened to her, and not just because she was rolling a massive spliff.

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Human

Posts: 1510 | From: Romsey, Vic, AU | Registered: May 2014  |  IP: Logged
RdrEmCofE
Shipmate
# 17511

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May I add SpouseSplaining to the growing list, just in the interests of impartiality. I would have asked that WifeSplaining be added but it might get me into water 'out of my depth'.

My wife is registered blind but still offers driving advice e.g. if I am sluggish taking away from a green light. Her ESP is awesome and not to be ignored.

I always accept 'advice' in such situations, believing it is better to have two eyes and a blind spouse with uncanny ESP, than just two eyes with 40 years driving experience behind them. (One can easily miss something important one rare occasion. Who is to know beforehand when that might be?)

Upshot is: we should all be a bit less 'precious' about being told things we already know and a bit less 'in awe' of those who know things that we have not yet learned.

It's called being gracious.

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Love covers many sins. 1 Pet.4:8. God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, not holding their sins against them; 2 Cor.5:19

Posts: 222 | From: Southampton | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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What about ParentSplaining?

Yes, my mother was a wise woman and knew a lot about many things. But why did she need to tell me everything I was doing wrong when she came to watch one of my horseback riding lessons? (She'd never been on a horse.) She gave me advice about diving -- she'd never learned to swim. Then she wondered why I wouldn't let her sit in on the rehearsals of an after-school orchestra I was in (she didn't play a musical instrument).

I loved her dearly, miss her everyday, and was happy to have advice on the many things about which she was knowledgeable.

My father, on the other hand... how Mom put up with him for almost 50 years I'll never know!

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Don't keep calm. Go change the world.

Posts: 9755 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
lilBuddha
Shipmate
# 14333

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quote:
Originally posted by M.:
Blimey. Perhaps I've been lucky in my choice of men friends.

Perhaps I've put people down better.

But fine, let's disagree, because I just can't be arsed.

M. (Murdoch, apparently)

What about female friends? Or the thousands* of examples that can be found with a casual search?
You can think we are all liars or mistaken, and are entitled to your opinion. But please do not pretend it is an equally rational conclusion.


*at least

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So goodnight moon, I want the sun
If it's not here soon, I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say goodnight moon

- A. N. Parsley, D. Mcvinni

Posts: 17537 | From: the round earth's imagined corners | Registered: Dec 2008  |  IP: Logged
mousethief

Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953

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quote:
Originally posted by Rossweisse:
A discussion of manspreading on Facebook brought up the same objections of sexism, although, in my experience, it, too, is an overwhelmingly male practice. I suggested calling it "jerkspreading" instead, and the fellows still grumped. From their reactions (one asked "What about big purses taking up seats?", to which I responded, "Put them on your laps" to general male silence), I suspect that they are themselves manspreading practitioners.

Yeah, touching a woman's purse without leave is such a good idea. That wouldn't possibly be considered sexist (or illegal), would it?

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“Religion doesn't fuck up people, people fuck up religion.”—lilBuddha

Posts: 63494 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged



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