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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Blessing the Cadillac
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Simon
Editor
# 1
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Posted
This joke submitted by Campbellite:
A man buys a new Cadillac and wants to have it blessed. He goes to a Protestant minister who lays hands on the hood and prays, "Bless, O Lord, this shiny new Cadillac!"
The man then goes to a priest, who sprinkles it with holy water and prays over the new car in Latin.
The man then takes it to a rabbi, who prays over the car in Hebrew... and cuts off two inches of the tailpipe.
[ 05. July 2005, 09:26: Message edited by: Simon ]
Poll information
This poll contains 2 question(s). 121 user(s) have voted.
You can't view the results of this poll without voting.
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Eternal memory
Posts: 3787 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2001
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The Scrumpmeister
Ship’s Taverner
# 5638
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Posted
I've heard this one a couple of times, but I always find it funny.
None of these jokes is offensive though.
Where are all the really cringeworthy ones about Judas being a great kisser and Jesus being well hung?
[ 05. July 2005, 10:54: Message edited by: Back-to-Front ]
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If Christ is not fully human, humankind is not fully saved. - St John of Saint-Denis
Posts: 14741 | From: Greater Manchester, UK | Registered: Mar 2004
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Adam.
Like as the
# 4991
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Posted
I suppose I didn't find this one particularly funny, because it's easier to laugh at your own tradition than some-body else's.
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Ave Crux, Spes Unica!
Preaching blog
Posts: 8164 | From: Notre Dame, IN | Registered: Sep 2003
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Mark M
Shipmate
# 9500
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Back-to-Front:
I've heard this one a couple of times, but I always find it funny.
None of these jokes is offensive though.
Where are all the really cringeworthy ones about Judas being a great kisser and Jesus being well hung?
Unfortunately I just don't get it...
maybe that's because I'm meant to be asleep now?
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I only know three words of Latin: deus caritas est.
Posts: 139 | From: Edinburgh, Scotland UK | Registered: May 2005
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The Scrumpmeister
Ship’s Taverner
# 5638
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Posted
Circumcision, dear.
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If Christ is not fully human, humankind is not fully saved. - St John of Saint-Denis
Posts: 14741 | From: Greater Manchester, UK | Registered: Mar 2004
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Foolhearty
Shipmate
# 6196
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Posted
Not funny.
Feels like this joke might have had more to it at one point, and lost, erm, something important through too many re-tellings (as opposed to bris).
It's the Cadillac bit. There has to be some reason it's a Cadillac (and not a jalopy or a Ford Escort or Honda Civic). It should have called for more differentiating behavior/prayer from the three Holy Men.
It'd be funnier if what was being blessed was something that usually gets blessed, or if the thing being blessed played some role in the interactions between the clergy and the owner.
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Fear doesn't empty tomorrow of its perils; it empties today of its power.
Posts: 2301 | From: Upper right-hand corner | Registered: May 2004
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
Tacky. Circumcising a car ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
quote:
(From Back-to-Front:)
Where are all the really cringeworthy ones about Judas being a great kisser and Jesus being well hung?
Dunno. Why not post some?
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Alicïa
Shipmate
# 7668
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Posted
I didn't find it particularly funny or offensive.
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"The tendency to turn human judgments into divine commands makes religion one of the most dangerous forces in the world." Georgia Elma Harkness
Posts: 884 | From: Where the Art is. | Registered: Jun 2004
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Boopy
Shipmate
# 4738
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Posted
In the version I know, the focus is more on initiation rites and the car is just any car, make being unimportant. So the Anglican sprinkles it with holy water, the Baptist drives it into a lake, and the Rabbi trims the exhaust pipe. Not sure if that makes it much funnier....I laughed when I first heard it but that would be at least 20 years ago so it has done the rounds.
Posts: 1170 | From: UK | Registered: Jul 2003
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Lurker McLurker™
Ship's stowaway
# 1384
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Posted
That's the trouble with trying to evalauate jokes. One's natural instinct is to think of jokes that one has already heard as being less funny. It's hard to be objective when there are some new jokes (or new to me) and some old ones, such as this.
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Just War Theory- a perversion of morality?
Posts: 5661 | From: Raxacoricofallapatorius | Registered: Sep 2001
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Carys
Ship's Celticist
# 78
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Posted
I didn't get it at all.
Having just gone through all the jokes currently on board and voted, I notice that I voted 1 for an awful lot, but that varied between, incomprehension (like this one), not finding it funny and finding it tedious but I couldn't see a way of differentiating.
Carys
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O Lord, you have searched me and know me
You know when I sit and when I rise
Posts: 6896 | From: Bryste mwy na thebyg | Registered: May 2001
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Mark M
Shipmate
# 9500
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Back-to-Front:
Circumcision, dear.
Ah, thank you. I'm forced to agree with Ariel, though.
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I only know three words of Latin: deus caritas est.
Posts: 139 | From: Edinburgh, Scotland UK | Registered: May 2005
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Newman's Own
Shipmate
# 420
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Posted
Please excuse my innocence - but is this supposed to also be a reference to the old joke about how men have big cars as some kind of phallic symbol?
I thought it was stupid.
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Cheers,
Elizabeth
“History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn
Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001
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iGeek.*
Resident alien
# 3207
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Posted
Took me a moment to get it. I thought it moderately funny at that point (because I had to exert the effort to think, maybe I needed the jocular payoff?). Can't imagine what offense there might be in it.
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.sig on holiday
Posts: 702 | From: Hot-on-us, TX | Registered: Aug 2002
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Long-Johns Silver
Apprentice
# 1763
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Posted
A cut above some of the other jokes ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
quote:
the Baptist drives it into a lake
New variant for me - I like it & it builds up to the very well worn punch line
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"Smile", they said "it could be worse".
So I did...
And it was.
Posts: 49 | From: "The Church" - Church Inn that is :-) | Registered: Nov 2001
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churchgeek
Have candles, will pray
# 5557
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Posted
There should be a reason the man goes around getting it blessed by so many different clergy. People never do that with anything - they stick with their own tradition and that's it. Having a compelling reason to keep going to a new clergy member and have a new blessing done might have made the joke funny, or it might have just made it too long, I'm not sure which.
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I reserve the right to change my mind.
My article on the Virgin of Vladimir
Posts: 7773 | From: Detroit | Registered: Feb 2004
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Ann
Curious
# 94
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Posted
The version I know:
quote:
A priest and a rabbi each buy a new car. On Sunday afternoon, while the priest is washing his car for the first time the Rabbi walks by.
"What are you doing?" asks the rabbi.
The priest replies, "It's a new car, I'm baptising it."
Later on the priest drives past the rabbi's house and sees him walking to his new car with a hacksaw. As he watches, the rabbi saws off the last inch of the exhaust pipe.
This, to my mind, is a better explanation of why the ministers do what they do.
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Ann
Posts: 3271 | From: IO 91 PI | Registered: May 2001
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spacecadet
Apprentice
# 10131
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Posted
well at least it made me giggle (once) ![[Snore]](graemlins/snore.gif)
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"your arms are the arms that
hung shining stars in deepest space" - vicky beeching
Posts: 11 | From: the mother ship | Registered: Aug 2005
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Ogre
Shipmate
# 4601
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Posted
It's a fair chestnut: I must have heard it first about forty five years ago, so hearing it again was like meeting an old friend. When I told it to an Anglican cleric, shortly after I had first heard it, he tried to cap the punch line with, "I thought you were going to say the Rabbi was going to have the car Simonized!" ![[Votive]](graemlins/votive.gif)
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Pete Ergo Religionem
['Therefore Seek a Way of Life']
Posts: 480 | From: West Midlands, UK | Registered: Jun 2003
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