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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Doubting Thomas
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Simon
Editor
# 1
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Posted
Joke submitted by George Wagner:
St Thomas holds forth in the Upper Room. "I won't believe until I can place my fingers into the holes in His hands and His feet and thrust my hand into the wound in His side."
Just then the Risen Christ enters. "Tom," Jesus says, "the boys and I have been talking, and we're all afraid that you're becoming just a little too weird for our group."
[ 13. July 2005, 11:01: Message edited by: Simon ]
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Eternal memory
Posts: 3787 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2001
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Newman's Own
Shipmate
# 420
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Posted
This one could 'work' very well, particularly if it were told in tones of the KJV and Book of Common Prayer.
It is not hilarious, but it is fairly funny and not at all offensive. Thomas' request is a very strange one. I rather like jokes which capture some of the odd or amusing 'undertones' of incidents in the scriptures.
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Cheers,
Elizabeth
“History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn
Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001
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John Donne
Renaissance Man
# 220
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Posted
Oh yes, liked it. I think because it dares to say something about the parables, prophecies, happenings in the Bible that we all think but rarely say. Let's face it, some of them are off the planet.
Teeth like a flock of sheep... breasts like the twin fawns of a gazelle, spitting in mud and applying the mixture to someone's eyes, sticking your hands in someone's wounds... If someone at a party said those things, you'd edge slowly away.
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif)
Posts: 13667 | From: Perth, W.A. | Registered: May 2001
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Marquis
Apprentice
# 9750
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Posted
Best joke so far! Hysterical, if only because there are a few folks I know that this would apply to equally as well as Thomas.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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"I believe that the words Favour", "Owe", and "Big" were used....."
Posts: 28 | From: NYC | Registered: Jul 2005
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Zeke
Ship's Inquirer
# 3271
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Posted
I always had some feelings that the way Thomas is described in the gospel makes him really seem odd, and a little bit grisly as well. I was never comfortable enough to tell this to anybody, so having a story in which Jesus himself makes an observation on it was a real kick and a surprise too. This got a big laugh out of me.
I guess we are supposed to assume that Thomas was just coming up with the most outlandish idea he could think of, precisely because he was sure it wouldn't happen. He certainly isn't depicted as terribly bright, or trustful enough of the other disciples to so much as consider their account, even though he presumably had seen many miracles performed, including a couple of instances of bringing dead people back to life. There are those who think he was purposely shown in a bad light by a gospel writer with an axe to grind, but that is another kettle of fish.
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No longer the Bishop of Durham
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If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? --Benjamin Franklin
Posts: 5259 | From: Deep in the American desert | Registered: Sep 2002
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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
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Posted
I love it because we get Jesus speaking in a 21st century "concerned friend recommending a shrink" voice--"You know, you really ought to see someone about those thoughts of yours...."
PLUS, we know all the while that He's much weirder.
PS: Coot, may I use your last paragraph for a signature?
[ 12. July 2005, 03:45: Message edited by: Lamb Chopped ]
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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
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Lurker McLurker™
Ship's stowaway
# 1384
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Posted
I think it is hilarious. Probably because the whle idea is ridiculous but I never thought of it that way until now. Humour is at its best when it helps you see things from a new angle (of course, that's why it can be offensive as some people feel threatened by this).
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Just War Theory- a perversion of morality?
Posts: 5661 | From: Raxacoricofallapatorius | Registered: Sep 2001
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Newman's Own
Shipmate
# 420
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by The Coot:
Teeth like a flock of sheep... breasts like the twin fawns of a gazelle, spitting in mud and applying the mixture to someone's eyes, sticking your hands in someone's wounds... If someone at a party said those things, you'd edge slowly away.
Excellent and all too true, Coot! I'll not even think, for the moment, of Peter's walking on water, John's wanting to call down fire from heaven, or what the Pharisees were doing in the wheat field.
As an aside, remember Franco Zeffirelli's brilliant "Jesus of Nazareth"? Now and then, that film slipped in some inside jokes. They depicted Thomas as originally employed by Jairus - and insisting, when Jesus said the little girl was 'not dead, only sleeping,' 'But I saw she was dead!' That was almost as good as when the two thieves are waiting to be crucified, and the 'bad thief' shouts, "It was him who did the murder, not me!"
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Cheers,
Elizabeth
“History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn
Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001
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Tree Bee
Ship's tiller girl
# 4033
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Posted
Slightly amusing, but it's just a punchline.
I would have found it funnier if there had been a build up to it.
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"Any fool can make something complicated. It takes a genius to make it simple."
— Woody Guthrie
http://saysaysay54.wordpress.com
Posts: 5257 | From: me to you. | Registered: Feb 2003
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Left at the Altar
Ship's Siren
# 5077
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Posted
This is the best one so far. Great twist.
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Still pretty Amazing, but no longer Mavis.
Posts: 9111 | Registered: Oct 2003
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SteveTom
Contributing Editor
# 23
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Posted
I giggled long and loud at this. I've no idea why.
There's nothing clever about it, and I think that Thomas's demand for physical proof of the resurrection makes perfect sense, so logically the joke doesn't really work.
But I guess if you ignore the biblical context, the silliness and unexpectedness work for me.
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I saw a naked picture of me on the internet
Wearing Jesus's new snowshoes.
Well, golly gee.
- Eels
Posts: 1363 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Orb
Eye eye Cap'n!
# 3256
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Lurker McLurker™:
I think it is hilarious. Probably because the whle idea is ridiculous but I never thought of it that way until now. Humour is at its best when it helps you see things from a new angle (of course, that's why it can be offensive as some people feel threatened by this).
Yes, seeing things from a new angle IS offensive, isn't it? Also, determinedly Christian, I'd wager...
This joke has the most realistically "modern-day" patter of the ones I've read so far. It sounds like something a good stand-up (Bill Hicks?) might have used in mocking religion.
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“You cannot buy the revolution. You cannot make the revolution. You can only be the revolution. It is in your spirit, or it is nowhere.” Ursula K. Le Guin, The Dispossessed
Posts: 5032 | From: Easton, Bristol | Registered: Aug 2002
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