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Source: (consider it) Thread: A sign in the sky
Simon

Editor
# 1

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Joke submitted by Kitten, Evan, Linda Labida and welford:

Q: What's white and zips across the sky at 100 mph followed by a band of angels?

A: The coming of the Lord.

[ 18. July 2005, 22:40: Message edited by: Simon ]

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Eternal memory

Posts: 3787 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
mousethief

Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953

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Oh look, a sexual pun. [Snore]

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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...

Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
Calindreams
Shipmate
# 9147

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It would be slightly funiier if you missed out the bit 'followed by a band of angels'.

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Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore

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Sarkycow
La belle Dame sans merci
# 1012

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See, perhaps I'm being particularly slow today, but I didn't immediately realise the sexual pun here.

And yet I still laughed. Why did I laugh? Hmmm. I think it was the mental image, which made Jesus' return into a Superman/Batman type flight, having heard the call, or seen the signal that indicated trouble was happening. He's flying through the sky, ready to rescue the situation at the last moment.

Jesus' return is often presented (in the churches I have attended at any rate) as this big, celebratory, yet strangely pompous/ceremonial thing. He will appear, and slowly the cloud will lower him to earth, and everyone will fall to their knees in worship. Yet, in this joke, he's breaking his neck trying to get there, with a crowd of angels racing to keep up [Big Grin]

But then I read MT's snap comment, and realised that I had probably misunderstood the joke.

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“Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.”

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Pyx_e

Quixotic Tilter
# 57

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quote:
See, perhaps I'm being particularly slow today, but I didn't immediately realise the sexual pun here.

I think you need greater exposure to innuendo to hone up your skills. I know just the bloke.

P

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It is better to be Kind than right.

Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Amos

Shipmate
# 44

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Only 100mph? The speed of light would be better. I agree that the band of angels seems a bit de trop. Otherwise mildly funny (I liked the one about the fish too).

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At the end of the day we face our Maker alongside Jesus--ken

Posts: 7667 | From: Summerisle | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Newman's Own
Shipmate
# 420

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quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
quote:
See, perhaps I'm being particularly slow today, but I didn't immediately realise the sexual pun here.

I think you need greater exposure to innuendo to hone up your skills. I know just the bloke.
Well, Pyx_e, obviously you cannot send the bloke to
me ... but, though I did catch the sexual pun, I'm here wondering what the reference to the angels means in that context...

Obviously, this joke is not one I found very funny, since I do not fully even get it.

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Cheers,
Elizabeth
“History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn

Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Pyx_e

Quixotic Tilter
# 57

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It ain't rocket science:

quote:
I looked over Jordan and what did I see,
Comin' for to carry me home!
A band of angels comin' after me,
Comin' for to carry me home!

P

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It is better to be Kind than right.

Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
KenWritez
Shipmate
# 3238

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I confess I didn't get the joke either until I saw MT's post. Obviously I am Pyx_e deficient.

I need to go get some plums.

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"The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd." --Quentin Tarantino, Pulp Fiction

My blog: http://oxygenofgrace.blogspot.com

Posts: 11102 | From: Left coast of Wonderland, by the rabbit hole | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged
Nutmeg
Ship's spice girl
# 5297

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I heard that one in primary school.

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" Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read" - Groucho Marx

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Zeke
Ship's Inquirer
# 3271

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At first I didn't get it but then a split second later I did and felt really disgusted and offended too. I guess it's because it's God, after all, and attributing human body functions seemed really unacceptable, especially things you would probably not mention at all if you were with polite people.

I've read it a couple more times and am a little more used to it, so don't feel quite as offended, but it still strikes me as pretty disgusting. I can see why it's funny, though, and at least it doesn't mock anybody's suffering or anything like that.

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No longer the Bishop of Durham
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If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? --Benjamin Franklin

Posts: 5259 | From: Deep in the American desert | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
Midnight Scholar
Shipmate
# 9112

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quote:
Originally posted by Zeke:
At first I didn't get it but then a split second later I did and felt really disgusted and offended too. I guess it's because it's God, after all, and attributing human body functions seemed really unacceptable

But taking on of humanity, including bodily functions, is the very definition of Incarnation, isn't it? Many Christian-based jokes rely on just this notion.

However on this one I am with previous posters, in that it's the sort of lame 'dirty' joke I'd have expected to be swapped in my (RC) primary school playground, usually whispered between the 'in guys' who'd then refuse to tell it to nerds like me and pretend that made them big.

annoying that kind of behaviour - but common to primary schools everywhere I suspect.

Not offended - but really really not funny either.

mn

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Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth.
Deal with it.

Posts: 129 | From: out there | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
Ian Climacus

Liturgical Slattern
# 944

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I thought it was in relation to the Parousia.

Then I read MT's comment and wondered what drugs he was on...what did he mean sexual?

I voted.

Then I "got it".

Offensive, but not terribly. Not particularly funny either -- I thought my original thought of Christ tearing through the skies at 100mph was funnier.

[ 18. July 2005, 05:09: Message edited by: Ian Climacus ]

Posts: 7800 | From: On the border | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
Glimmer

Ship's Lantern
# 4540

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Well, well. Didn't get it at first (I'm familiar with the elephant one - what's grey and comes in pints) so scores 0 on the funny-meter. Then I got it but it still didn't nudge the score up.

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The original, unchanged 4540.
The Temple area, Ankh Morpork

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The Bede's American Successor

Curmudgeon-in-Training
# 5042

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quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
It ain't rocket science:

quote:
I looked over Jordan and what did I see,
Comin' for to carry me home!
A band of angels comin' after me,
Comin' for to carry me home!

P
I'm surprised a person from Wales would know the words to this song.

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This was the iniquity of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had pride of wealth and food in plenty, comfort and ease, and yet she never helped the poor and the wretched.

—Ezekiel 16.49

Posts: 6079 | From: The banks of Possession Sound | Registered: Oct 2003  |  IP: Logged
Eliab
Shipmate
# 9153

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[Ultra confused] The grammar is all to hell. "Coming" refers to the action, or to the experience, not to the physical substance produced. When was the last time anyone shouted at you for leaving "coming" all over the toilet seat? Exactly. It's a crap pun.

Surely the question should be "What fills the sky with whiteness flying at 100 mph [followed by bands of angels - if you think they add anything]?"

It's a little bit distasteful. The idea of a God masturbating all over the sky is pretty far removed from the one I worship, so I don't feel that my religion is under attack here, but there is a fair degree of trivialisation of God involved in the joke. It's hard to reconcile laughing at this with praying "Hallowed be thy name".

There's also an element of taking as a sexual punchline a well known quotation that I don't like. It spoils the quote in its original and proper context. To justify such desecration, I think you need to pay for it with a better laugh than this joke gets.

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"Perhaps there is poetic beauty in the abstract ideas of justice or fairness, but I doubt if many lawyers are moved by it"

Richard Dawkins

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frin

Drinking coffee for Jesus
# 9

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Despite the above complaints about grammar, I've conjured a similar mental image to this one many times while trying to sing "mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the lord". The original in its proper context suggests its own spoiling simply through the evolution of language in general.

'frin

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"Even the crocodile looks after her young" - Lamentations 4, remembering Erin.

Posts: 4496 | From: a library | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
Pyx_e

Quixotic Tilter
# 57

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quote:
Originally posted by The Bede's American Successor:
quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
It ain't rocket science:

quote:
I looked over Jordan and what did I see,
Comin' for to carry me home!
A band of angels comin' after me,
Comin' for to carry me home!

P
I'm surprised a person from Wales would know the words to this song.
When we meet I shall sing you the whole bloody thing in my best Paul Robeson.

P

[ 18. July 2005, 16:03: Message edited by: Pyx_e ]

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It is better to be Kind than right.

Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
The Bede's American Successor

Curmudgeon-in-Training
# 5042

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quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
quote:
Originally posted by The Bede's American Successor:
quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
It ain't rocket science:

quote:
I looked over Jordan and what did I see,
Comin' for to carry me home!
A band of angels comin' after me,
Comin' for to carry me home!

P
I'm surprised a person from Wales would know the words to this song.
When we meet I shall sing you the whole bloody thing in my best Paul Robeson.

P

Complete with gestures?

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This was the iniquity of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had pride of wealth and food in plenty, comfort and ease, and yet she never helped the poor and the wretched.

—Ezekiel 16.49

Posts: 6079 | From: The banks of Possession Sound | Registered: Oct 2003  |  IP: Logged
Pyx_e

Quixotic Tilter
# 57

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Yeah, but the rugby ones.

P

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It is better to be Kind than right.

Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
The Bede's American Successor

Curmudgeon-in-Training
# 5042

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quote:
Originally posted by Pyx_e:
Yeah, but the rugby ones.

P

Are there any other?

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This was the iniquity of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had pride of wealth and food in plenty, comfort and ease, and yet she never helped the poor and the wretched.

—Ezekiel 16.49

Posts: 6079 | From: The banks of Possession Sound | Registered: Oct 2003  |  IP: Logged
Pyx_e

Quixotic Tilter
# 57

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The Sunday School ones, it's best not to get them confused.

P

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It is better to be Kind than right.

Posts: 9778 | From: The Dark Tower | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
rajm
Shipmate
# 5434

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quote:
Originally posted by Glimmer:
Well, well. Didn't get it at first (I'm familiar with the elephant one - what's grey and comes in pints) so scores 0 on the funny-meter. Then I got it but it still didn't nudge the score up.

This story at the register appears to be converging both with that and the original joke
Posts: 131 | From: Cheshire | Registered: Jan 2004  |  IP: Logged
rajm
Shipmate
# 5434

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quote:
Originally posted by frin:
Despite the above complaints about grammar, I've conjured a similar mental image to this one many times while trying to sing "mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the lord".

I have a copy of Carlo Caretto's The God who Comes on my bedside table and the image frequently disturbs me.
Posts: 131 | From: Cheshire | Registered: Jan 2004  |  IP: Logged
Trudy Scrumptious

BBE Shieldmaiden
# 5647

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Having posted elsewhere that I am just juvenile enough to find "coming" puns hilarious, I have to say that this one didn't do it for me, so it must be really bad.

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Books and things.

I lied. There are no things. Just books.

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SteveTom
Contributing Editor
# 23

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quote:
Originally posted by TrudyTrudy (I say unto you):
Having posted elsewhere that I am just juvenile enough to find "coming" puns hilarious...

Amen. May I not live too long to snigger at puerile innuendo.

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I saw a naked picture of me on the internet
Wearing Jesus's new snowshoes.
Well, golly gee.
- Eels

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uvatar
Apprentice
# 9848

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I agree that the joke just ain't funny except when you forget the sexual meaning and try to get a picture of jesus and the angels zipping across the sky...

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every man is evil, every man' s a liar, unashamed with a wicked tong singing in the black soul choir

Posts: 2 | From: belgium | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged
Esmeralda

Ship's token UK Mennonite
# 582

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Found this one pretty disgusting and not at all funny. It created a really vile mental picture.

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I can take the despair. It's the hope I can't stand.

http://reversedstandard.wordpress.com/

Posts: 17415 | From: A small island nobody pays any attention to | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged


 
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