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» Ship of Fools   » Things we did   » The Laugh Judgment   » The rabbi and priest's lunch

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Source: (consider it) Thread: The rabbi and priest's lunch

# 1

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Joke submitted by KenWritez, dinghy sailor, Esmerelda, rita, Marquis, Tenebris, Paul Brown and john ayliffe:

A rabbi and a priest are eating lunch together. The priest leans over and says, "Is it still true Jews can't eat pork?"

The rabbi nods and says, "Yeah, and is it true you Catholic priests can't have sex?"

The priest sighs and agrees.

A few minutes later, the priest whispers to the rabbi, "Have you ever eaten pork?"

The rabbi looks abashed but says, "Yes, I ate a ham sandwich once. Did you ever break your vow of celibacy?"

The priest sighs and says, "Yes, once, she was beautiful."

The rabbi smiles and says, "Better than a ham sandwich, isn't it?"

[ 18. July 2005, 22:40: Message edited by: Simon ]

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Eternal memory

Posts: 3787 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
Wesley J

Silly Shipmate
# 6075

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I find this one quite touching, and I can even see a hint of tenderness and comprehension in the Rabbi's final remark.

Two taboo-breakers (or sinners) are involved, and for a change a Jew seems to have an advantage over a Christian - at least in its RC form; not racist, nor offensive, though it may be a bit hurting to those in a position of 'forced' celibacy.

Even though we don't know the priest's answer, I imagine him smiling and sadly admitting that it was so, but perhaps also that he is content he knows. [Smile]

Perhaps one of those tiny, small revolutionary jokes that go around in the RC church, as a sign of hope perhaps that this rule might change one day, as it maybe right now causes more suffering than positive results.

(But then, I'm not RC, so please take this with a pinch of salt.)

Rather hilarious and witty, because containing some truth as well as being somehow compassionate: 4 points.

Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)

Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged
# 9691

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For me it is the unexpectedness of the punchline that makes me laugh. The joke was very predictable and so I didn't find it very funny.
Posts: 28 | From: Birmingham | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged
Ship's Inquirer
# 3271

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I'k heard this several times before, and I have always really liked it. The first time I heard it made me laugh quite a bit. I heard it as a Jewish joke, in which the two are side by side on a long airplane flight. In this version, there's a little more triumph from the rabbi, like he's really gotten the best deal of the two.

Not offensive at all, especially if you hear the version (as I originally did) that both these events occurred before the men entered religious life(for the priest, it was before seminary).

No longer the Bishop of Durham
If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? --Benjamin Franklin

Posts: 5259 | From: Deep in the American desert | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492

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I hoped to hear that the rabbi didn't try to mate with a ham sandwich; I did read Portnoy's Complaint. I found it very funny, not at all offensive and yes the priest gets the better deal: women are way more fun than ham sandwiches.

Something some of you may not know: we do have a handful of married men in the RC priesthood. They were (obviously?) originally ordained in C of E or Anglican dioceses. Of course there are also a handful uf widowers who became priests.

Still, a damn funny joke!

If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.

Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Newman's Own
# 420

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I did not find this joke to be hilarious, but did see a certain warmth which I found appealing. Everyone has fallen short of convictions in one way or another, and two dedicated clergy who are admitting to a single lapse seems a supportive, understanding exchange.

“History as Revelation is seldom very revealing, and histories of holiness are full of holes.” - Dermot Quinn

Posts: 6740 | From: Library or pub | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Marvin the Martian

# 4360

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Originally posted by Sir Kevin:
yes the priest gets the better deal: women are way more fun than ham sandwiches.

Methinks you have the wrong end of the stick here. The Rabbi gets the far better deal, because he only has to give up ham sandwiches - he can have sex whenever he wants. [Big Grin]

Hail Gallaxhar

Posts: 30100 | From: Adrift on a sea of surreality | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
# 3339

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This is one of the funnier ones.

Not offensive, even though I think the rabbi is laughing at the priest getting the bum deal.

Funnily enough I attended an RC wedding only yesterday where the (utterly charming) priest owned up to a feeling of jealousy when performing the sacrament of marriage. Hope he's heard this one.

Posts: 130 | From: London | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
The Bede's American Successor

# 5042

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Originally posted by themanwiththegingerhair:
For me it is the unexpectedness of the punchline that makes me laugh. The joke was very predictable and so I didn't find it very funny.

For me, the punchline was unexpected for another reason. Following the lead of other jokes in the Laugh Judgement, I was expecting something other than a beautiful female for the priest. Thank you for dissappointing me.

This was the iniquity of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had pride of wealth and food in plenty, comfort and ease, and yet she never helped the poor and the wretched.

—Ezekiel 16.49

Posts: 6079 | From: The banks of Possession Sound | Registered: Oct 2003  |  IP: Logged

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