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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: How to make small talk at an event
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
If I could afford it, which I can't, I'd love to live in the anglo-catholic 'retirement village' aka nursing home which is part of my 'ministry' because the people are mostly the sort i get on with well and who probably minister more to me than I to them.
But what happens if, having chosen your select little group of people to be friends with, they decide that they don't want to be friends with you? Then you're seriously screwed.
Much better to be open and friendly to everyone, even if you are an introvert, then you will always have some people you can turn to in a general way, as well as one or two close friends if you are fortunate enough to find them.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Belle Ringer
Shipmate
# 13379
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Posted
I'm really bad at small talk. I didn't understand the point of it until an article recently explained, so I'm trying to pretend interest in the weather" ("It's been raining all week!" As if we don't all know that?), and other inane topics.
I have learned that if someone asks a yes or no question like "are you going somewhere this summer?" I'm supposed to say more than just yes or no, use it as a springboard to further conversation, "no, but last year I went to X, have you been there?" or "No, instead I'm going to stay home and work on the house, do you have any tips for painting a room?"
I have also learned that when asked "how was your trip?" they want to hear one sentence, at most two: "I saw a small herd of buffalo cross the road ten feet in front of my car!" The question is small talk, not genuine interest in all that you did and saw and learned and wish you could have done.
Drives me buggy when a whole meal gathering consists of nothing but small talk, so I guess some people enjoy it, or really do care in detail about what the latest issue of People magazine said.
Posts: 5830 | From: Texas | Registered: Jan 2008
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BessLane
Shipmate
# 15176
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Posted
Small talk is a large part of my bread and butter and I have had to learn how to do it well, without seeming like I'm reading from a mental script. Yes, fifteen mini-conversations a day about the weather, or the Cardnals pitching staff, or whatever can be a bit trying at times, but IMO, it's part of the social contract.
And just because I can chatter on with folks inanely about fluff doesn't mean I don't hear the deeper stuff as well. Small talk is like the the opening pitch in a ball game. In the long run, it doesn't matter if it's a strike, a ball or a home-run, without that first pitch, you can't have a game.
FWIW...
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It's all on me and I won't tell it.
formerly BessHiggs
Posts: 1388 | From: Yorkville, TN | Registered: Sep 2009
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jacobsen
seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Another small-talk clutz checking in. A large part of my life has been spent learning how to chat! I attribute my shortcomings in this area to my mother, who was severely practically minded, often too tired to communicate, and whose first language was not English. Tiredness can make it very difficult to chat in a foreign language, however well you may speak it normally.
I try to observe how other people do it, and steal their gambits for later use. After all, if I can't be bothered with the effort to make contact, why should anyone else? And as has been said earlier on this thread, our first and longest standing friends may not always be around. It's as well to have seedling acquaintances with growth potential. This I learned from my mother, as mobility problems left her increasingly isolated. I'm like her in many ways, some good, but some to be guarded against.
[ 30. August 2012, 19:00: Message edited by: jacobsen ]
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But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Tortuf
Ship's fisherman
# 3784
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Posted
You guys are so over analyzing this stuff.
Posts: 6963 | From: The Venice of the South | Registered: Dec 2002
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BessLane
Shipmate
# 15176
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Tortuf:
You guys are so over analyzing this stuff.
Hmmmm...I wonder exactly what you mean by that... ![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
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It's all on me and I won't tell it.
formerly BessHiggs
Posts: 1388 | From: Yorkville, TN | Registered: Sep 2009
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Belle Ringer:
I have learned that if someone asks a yes or no question like "are you going somewhere this summer?" I'm supposed to say more than just yes or no, use it as a springboard to further conversation, "no, but last year I went to X, have you been there?" or "No, instead I'm going to stay home and work on the house, do you have any tips for painting a room?"
I have also learned that when asked "how was your trip?" they want to hear one sentence, at most two: "I saw a small herd of buffalo cross the road ten feet in front of my car!" The question is small talk, not genuine interest in all that you did and saw and learned and wish you could have done.
The "how was your trip?" question can be a springboard just as easily as the "are you going somewhere this summer?" question. Sometimes it's just a courtesy, acknowledging your absence, but if the person asking finds your response interesting, you can if you want talk further about it. If the original question was more specific -- "how was white-water rafting?" -- it's an indication of a higher level of interest. Your response about the herd of buffalo crossing the river may lead the person to ask more questions or show enough interest for you to tell more.
The first thing is to pay attention to how people respond to what you say. The second to realize that there's a lot of ground in between a courtesy inquiry about your trip and an interest in hearing about all you did/saw/learned/wish you could have done.
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
The Royal Family have a habit of purposely not asking people they meet any question that can be answered with a straight yes or no, which works very well in drawing people out.
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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kingsfold
Shipmate
# 1726
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Posted
I can do the opening question, and use the open question that doesn't have a yes/no answer. But I struggle to gauge the right questions to move the conversation forward, especially if the answer I get to the initial question is itself fairly closed. Oh well, maybe one day I'll get the hang of it.
Posts: 4473 | From: land of the wee midgie | Registered: Nov 2001
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Yangtze
Shipmate
# 4965
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Posted
I was in a social situation the other evening where, as happens, groups ebb and flow and at one point I was left alone with a chap. I'm brilliant at talk both small and large/deep. He clearly wasn't. End result, I keep trying to make conversation and get absolutely nothing back.
Now quite possibly he's standing there thinking why on earth is she asking me about the weather, how long I've been coming to this event etc etc what a waste of time.
BUT, and here's the rub, he made absolutely no effort to direct the conversation to a topic that he did want to talk about. He was not proactive in the conversation at all. If I asked him something he would reply with one or two words but he never gave more and he never asked me anything.
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Arthur & Henry Ethical Shirts for Men
organic cotton, fair trade cotton, linen
Sometimes I wonder What's for Afters?
Posts: 2022 | From: the smallest town in England | Registered: Sep 2003
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Yangtze
Shipmate
# 4965
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Posted
Sorry, cut off before the end.
I suppose my point was that the lack of any talk in that social setting made me feel awkward and uncomfortable. (He may have been perfectly comfortable.) I'm pretty OK with people not talking and preferring to listen in group settings but when there's just two of you it does seem rude.
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Arthur & Henry Ethical Shirts for Men
organic cotton, fair trade cotton, linen
Sometimes I wonder What's for Afters?
Posts: 2022 | From: the smallest town in England | Registered: Sep 2003
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Lyda*Rose
Ship's broken porthole
# 4544
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Posted
At that point, I think that I would smile and say, "Well, it looks like we've run out of topics. It's been nice," and then wander off to the refreshments.
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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano
Posts: 21377 | From: CA | Registered: May 2003
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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
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Posted
And hope there ARE refreshments, it's much easier to get through awkward pauses when you can pretend to have your mouth full.
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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
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Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
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Posted
Of course, some people are just shy. My son was always fascinated by people and listened to all the conversations in the room. He never joined in.
I think it takes great effort for shy people. When we went camping with friends their son had Aspergers and never stopped talking - they made a perfect pair, Mike listened, Tim talked and neither felt awkward!
But, slowly, very slowly - Mike learned. He now lives in Germany and works as a carer for disabled adults. He has no choice but to meet and speak to new people every day - and loves it. When we visit he does all the talking to strangers as we have no German - what a turn around!
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Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
Of course, some people are just shy. My son was always fascinated by people and listened to all the conversations in the room. He never joined in.
That's pretty much how I am by nature-- I think somewhere along the line I realized I could market this trait by becoming "a good listener"-- meaning I could generate conversation by asking questions about what other people were saying.
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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Zappa
Ship's Wake
# 8433
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Chorister:
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
If I could afford it, which I can't, I'd love to live in the anglo-catholic 'retirement village' aka nursing home which is part of my 'ministry' because the people are mostly the sort i get on with well and who probably minister more to me than I to them.
But what happens if, having chosen your select little group of people to be friends with, they decide that they don't want to be friends with you? Then you're seriously screwed.
Much better to be open and friendly to everyone, even if you are an introvert, then you will always have some people you can turn to in a general way, as well as one or two close friends if you are fortunate enough to find them.
Peronally I'd prefer to retire to a large room containing a big loopy dog and an aspidistra.
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shameless self promotion - because I think it's worth it
and mayhap this too: http://broken-moments.blogspot.co.nz/
Posts: 18917 | From: "Central" is all they call it | Registered: Sep 2004
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Definitely a cat, not a dog. They have antisocialism off to a fine art.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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venbede
Shipmate
# 16669
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Posted
Like young leo, I'm an introvert, but now I'm in the Second Half of Life, my extrovert shadow side comes into play.
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Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.
Posts: 3201 | From: An historic market town nestling in the folds of Surrey's rolling North Downs, | Registered: Sep 2011
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sebby
Shipmate
# 15147
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
quote:
Originally posted by Boogie:
There is no such thing as small talk imo. It's all conversation.
You are either interested in other people or you are not.
No. Small talk is there as a way to avoid real conversation with people one is not interested in.
I think the OP is really about that uncomfortable expression 'how to work a room'. One of the really rather important jobs that clergy have to do is precisely that - certainly in the commuity in which I live, which is fairly rural.
Whether it is the Life Boat Coffee Morning, or the village pub, it is almost expected as a given here that the vicar will speak to everyone. This is particuarly the case as the quite extraordinary 90-something year old incumbent could effortlessly arrive in the back bar full of 20 year olds and make them laugh, then move to the lounge bar and go around each table saying something to each group of holidaymakers. It meant that everyone knew him and felt that he was approachable. Quite frequently he would then be asked by randoms 'what time is the sevice on Sunday?'. It was about visibility.
After his time someone arrived who was well meaning enough, but caused offence as he once walked past someone without seeing them. Within days it was around the community that the new vicar was 'stand offish' and 'snobbish' (although actually working class) or 'never speaks' or 'only interested in those who go to church'. It may have been unreasonable, but it was, and is, how things are.
Small talk, however we define it, it a way of making people feel that they are important. Trivial comments frequently lead to full conversations. Although an extreme conparison, the royal family are quite good at it (its partly what they are paid for) and it helps keep their show on the road.
It would be unwise to underestaimate its power.
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sebhyatt
Posts: 1340 | From: yorks | Registered: Sep 2009
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venbede
Shipmate
# 16669
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Posted
That's good, sebby.
I remember the blessed Jim Thompson as Bishop of Stepney at a parish lunch in after a confirmation in Hackney. He went round to every table and had tried to speak (and listen ) to everyone. He was not patronising or trivial from what I witnessed.
Small talk can be trivial and showing off, but not necessarily.
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Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.
Posts: 3201 | From: An historic market town nestling in the folds of Surrey's rolling North Downs, | Registered: Sep 2011
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leo
Shipmate
# 1458
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Posted
I was reflecting on two social events last night and concluded that unless people make a real effort, people cling to the like-minded.
One was my 50th birthday. I booked a restaurant and invited 50 people - the only time all the different aspects of my life came together - teacher colleagues, church folk, book club people, friends. Each group sat together at separate tables and I was the only one who spoke to everybody - so much so that i never got round to eating a meal myself and had to get a takeaway afterwards.
The second event was last monday - my colleague's 60th birthday. The first hour or so was standing up drinking Pimms. Then everyone went to tables for a meal. Like my previous event, everyone gravitated to their own types. My table was made up of teachers and dinner ladies and i even spoke with the PE teacher i'd normally avoid. Then there was former pupils, present 6th formers, drama luvvies (the birthday boy = Head of Drama)
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My Jewish-positive lectionary blog is at http://recognisingjewishrootsinthelectionary.wordpress.com/
My reviews at http://layreadersbookreviews.wordpress.com
Posts: 23198 | From: Bristol | Registered: Oct 2001
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jacobsen
seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Happy birthday, Leo. But somehow I thought of you as much older than myself, rather than 11 years younger! ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
Nobbut a lad, indeed. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
[ 31. August 2012, 12:13: Message edited by: jacobsen ]
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But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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venbede
Shipmate
# 16669
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Posted
Happy Birthday, leo.
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Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.
Posts: 3201 | From: An historic market town nestling in the folds of Surrey's rolling North Downs, | Registered: Sep 2011
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
There’s always a danger in asking generic questions… I’ve heard this same story about various First Ladies (and it’s probably told of similar people in other countries). A guest at a party sees a woman who looks familiar and he just knows that he should recognize her. So he asks how she is, how’s the family, and what’s her husband doing these days? The First Lady replies, “Oh, he’s still President of the United States.”
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by venbede:
Happy Birthday, leo.
Happy birthday, Leo -- but from your profile it appears that the story you told is from just over 11 years ago. (But I hope you had a happy 60th last year!)
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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mark_in_manchester
not waving, but...
# 15978
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Posted
I acquired a new hobby this year, the details of which should probably be reserved for the 'hey MiM, just what _was_ that new hobby?' follow-up question which this kind of structured ( ![[Smile]](smile.gif) ) forum rather discourages. More relevant to the OP, the in-the-flesh newby-ness which ensued - club meetings where I knew no-one, silly questions which I knew were silly but which I really had to ask - took me back 33 years to joining the cubs, and to that feeling which has periodically recurred - youth clubs, university halls of residence, new towns and new jobs - of breaking in and starting from scratch. It's quite a while since I last went through it - and a useful thing to remember now I have kids who are, and will be, going through it themselves.
I was surprised how lonely and uncomfortable I still find it - if the interweb had been a third option, alongside going through the pain or watching telly with the parents, I wonder if I would have put myself through it as a teenager. I wonder too if this has anything to do with the vanishing of church (or at least, para-church) youth clubs in my part of the world.
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"We are punished by our sins, not for them" - Elbert Hubbard
(so good, I wanted to see it after my posts and not only after those of shipmate JBohn from whom I stole it)
Posts: 1596 | Registered: Oct 2010
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Sighthound
Shipmate
# 15185
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Posted
I am really poor at small talk. On the other hand, if someone gets me going, I can easily say more than I ought.
I think it's probably some kind of syndrome. I was much easier in company when I could take a drink or three, but nowadays I just have the odd pint and it isn't enough to relax me.
I think the Jane Austen theory on this is that one should keep practising.
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Supporter of Tia Greyhound and Lurcher Rescue.http://tiagreyhounds.org/
Posts: 168 | From: England | Registered: Sep 2009
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jacobsen
seeker
# 14998
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
I was reflecting on two social events last night ...........
One was my 50th birthday.
A misunderstanding - I should have checked your profile, Leo. Not such a lad after all.
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
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But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Zappa:
Peronally I'd prefer to retire to a large room containing a big loopy dog and an aspidistra.
Hee. I will very often seek out the pets at a party.
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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Garasu
Shipmate
# 17152
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Posted
I'll often seek out the Aspidistra...
Anyone remember the Adventure game?
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"Could I believe in the doctrine without believing in the deity?". - Modesitt, L. E., Jr., 1943- Imager.
Posts: 889 | From: Surrey Heath (England) | Registered: Jun 2012
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
As the saying goes: Boys will be boys. And so will a lot of middle-aged men.
Anyway, youse'ns have it easy; I've just come from a social evening with French, Norwegian, Colombian and Afrikaaner company. You get a feel for what jokes work cross-culturally.
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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sebby
Shipmate
# 15147
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
quote:
Originally posted by Zappa:
Peronally I'd prefer to retire to a large room containing a big loopy dog and an aspidistra.
Hee. I will very often seek out the pets at a party.
Apparently The Queen likes a good chat about pets (dogs) or even horses. It provides a topic for converaation and diverts from anything personal or controversial. It is said she dones't like it if someone bends down and strokes the corgis.
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sebhyatt
Posts: 1340 | From: yorks | Registered: Sep 2009
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la vie en rouge
Parisienne
# 10688
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Kelly Alves:
quote:
Originally posted by Zappa:
Peronally I'd prefer to retire to a large room containing a big loopy dog and an aspidistra.
Hee. I will very often seek out the pets at a party.
Small children can also be quite handy in this respect, if anyone's brought any. This has the dual advantage that people also think that you are playing with the children because you are a kind-hearted loving person and not because you are avoiding small talk with the adults.
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Rent my holiday home in the South of France
Posts: 3696 | Registered: Nov 2005
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
I find small talk with children much harder than with adults. Dogs are the easiest.
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Garasu
Shipmate
# 17152
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Posted
Dogs exist purely to give English people the opportunity to talk to one another...
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"Could I believe in the doctrine without believing in the deity?". - Modesitt, L. E., Jr., 1943- Imager.
Posts: 889 | From: Surrey Heath (England) | Registered: Jun 2012
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
I find small talk with children much harder than with adults.
Its easier the younger they are. Babies easiest. You can do it with your eyebrows!
But once above the age of about six to eight they will usually be aware that it's social death to be seen talking to anyone remotely resembling adults and so avoid any attempt to make contact.
Though to be fair, stupid adults will keep on asking then what they did at school, or what they want to do when they leave school, or remarking on how much they have grown, or reminding them how little they were when stupid adult first met them. You can understand them not wanting to waste social time on conversations like that...
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Ken
L’amor che move il sole e l’altre stelle.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
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Posted
Ask them if they saw the spider in the front porch. That's usually good for a flurry of "Ewwwww"s and requests to go out and look.
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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
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recklessrat
Shipmate
# 17243
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Posted
Yes, dogs and other animals make great topics!
The frustrating thing for me is an introvert is that however much I practise small talk, it never seems to get easier...every party/networking event/staff training I go on seems to take a similarly gargantuatan effort to attend. And then there's all the self-analysis afterwards! Yuk.
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stay simple, remain whole
Posts: 80 | From: The Shires | Registered: Jul 2012
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Kelly Alves
Bunny with an axe
# 2522
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by ken:
quote:
Originally posted by Pigwidgeon:
I find small talk with children much harder than with adults.
Its easier the younger they are. Babies easiest. You can do it with your eyebrows!
But once above the age of about six to eight they will usually be aware that it's social death to be seen talking to anyone remotely resembling adults and so avoid any attempt to make contact.
Though to be fair, stupid adults will keep on asking then what they did at school, or what they want to do when they leave school, or remarking on how much they have grown, or reminding them how little they were when stupid adult first met them. You can understand them not wanting to waste social time on conversations like that...
Talking to kids is actually one of my favorite things in the world to do. Maybe even my favorite thing. It's the adults I have problems with.
And as a tip, I usually let the kid lead-- they start off shy, but once they find you are genuinely responding to them and not just practicing your kid skills on them, they loosen up and start babbling away. And kids always have way more interesting things on their minds than most adults.
Sample adult conversation: I haven't had a good Merlot since 1993, and I fear I never shall again.
Sample kid convo: If you look at a certain clump in the shag rug in the hall, it looks just like Snoopy. Wait, now I see a hermit crab. Wait, I think can make a map out of it...
Guess which conversation I'm gonna get involved in?
So anyway, Yeah, I play with the pets (if they'll have me), I'll talk to the kids, just because it's fun. But as it seems to be OK on this thread to admit to conversational hopelessness, here's the one habit I have at parties that will probably earn me the most exasperated looks-- I will wander around until I find a speaker to sit next to, and just zone out listening to the music.
And I will hum along, if it's a good set.
Worse-- because this might be an excellent conversation starter (I just LOVE Sam and Dave!) but the problem is, if I am in a conversation and a good song comes on, I will totally stop the conversation and say "Hang on, I love this song." Because to me, if it's a really, really good song it's our job as grateful human beings to bask in it.
I bet in my twenties more than one poor guy trying to chat just wandered off in defeat as Elvis Costello won over. And I would look up, blinking and thinking,"Where'd that cute guy go?"
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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.
Posts: 35076 | From: Pura Californiana | Registered: Mar 2002
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ExclamationMark
Shipmate
# 14715
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
i even spoke with the PE teacher i'd normally avoid.
What?! Even the PE teacher? What possessed you man, were you in your right mind or had the PIMMS taken its gruesome toll?
Whoever would have thought it ... leo talking to the PE teacher.....
Posts: 3845 | From: A new Jerusalem | Registered: Apr 2009
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
Sometimes I just wait for people to come up and talk to me: I used to smoke cigars and a pipe and one time I was a deck carpenter on a production of the show Annie .
TV actress MacKenzie Phillips is the daughter of the late John Phillips and stepdaughter of his widow Michelle. She just came up to me, lit a cigarette and started a conversation. I almost never talk to the talent unless they speak to me first. I was amazed to find out that her stepmother was sixty!
Another time, my best friend (a young lady) just happened to talk to the person in front of her in a cue for the cinema in Beverly Hills. The wait was quite long and the three of us went for ice cream after the film. Our new friend just happened to be the daughter of the late film director George Roy Hill and we spent the weekend with the Hill family. Mr. Hill directed The Sting among other films but he was very unassuming. He was doing the final editing of The Great Waldo Pepper, a small film starring Bob Redford as a barnstormer pilot. By the time it was done, a horrible film called Airport 1976 was cast, produced, edited and released. Mrs. Hill had tried out for a part when we were there which she did not get! I was sad to be left out the following weekend when my friend had dinner on Malibu Beach with the Newmans because I had mid-terms!
You live in LA and you meet interesting and famous people all the time. I'm not shy; I can talk to anybody.
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
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Posted
Meh. I used to meet them, but because I can't recognize faces I would say things like "can you tell me the way to the ladies' room"? ![[Hot and Hormonal]](icon_redface.gif)
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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by leo:
Did anyone hear Stephen Fry's programme about small talk om Radio 4 the Thursday before last? Philosopher Theodore Zeldin stated that quote:
A proper conversation gets going only after about an hour: when, we assume, most of the strategies that we have cultivated for social situations are exhausted.
Depends. In some circumstances, with some people, you establish an instant rapport. Otherwise, an hour's prelude to baring souls seems only decent.
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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Curiosity killed ...
Ship's Mug
# 11770
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Posted
It's an interesting one - at the Globe as a groundling on my own this week, I got chatting to the guy in a wheelchair placed next to me right up against the stage - about how booking a wheelchair there worked, other performances this season (we both loved Richard III), other Olympic stuff, other theatres, and quite how rude the lady was who dumped her bag on his platform* and ignored him totally before moving off. And we both got chatting to a very enthusiastic Italian girl in the interval. I started pretty much all of those conversations, other than the ones started by the Italian girl, but he did reciprocate.
* There was a platform butted up against the stage with ramps to get a wheelchair on to it. When he was in place, the assistants moved the ramps out of the way and put a chain across the back. Apparently they'll do the same thing at the back of the yard and there's somewhere in the seating that works too. But he, like me, finds a place near the stage works best.
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Mugs - Keep the Ship afloat
Posts: 13794 | From: outiside the outer ring road | Registered: Aug 2006
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