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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Pearls of Wisdom
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Inspired by Albertus's sig.
Never go to a dentist with blood in his hair
and advice read recently
Never visit a doctor whose pot plants have died
what other pearls of wisdom are you able to offer other Shipmates?
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
The classics are -
Never eat at a place called 'Mom's'
and
Never play poker with a man named 'Doc'
[ 03. August 2013, 20:36: Message edited by: Firenze ]
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
It tastes like chicken.
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Ken
L’amor che move il sole e l’altre stelle.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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The Rogue
Shipmate
# 2275
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Posted
It's an accountancy mnemonic:
Purchases
Expenses
Assets
Receipts
Lialibilities
Sales
The first three are debit items and the bottom three credit.
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If everyone starts thinking outside the box does outside the box come back inside?
Posts: 2507 | From: Toton | Registered: Feb 2002
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
I could say Cast not pearls to swine but that would be cruel. ![[Two face]](graemlins/scot_twoface.gif) So, instead, I'll offer this relevant piece of Asian advice, which of course we shipmates would never do to each other (cough):
Do not remove a fly from your friend's forehead with a hatchet.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
My personal rule:
Never drink any wine that feels compelled to tell you in its name what color it is.
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
Car mechanics with clean hands are not to be trusted.
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
Sioni's Rule of Food: Avoid any recipe with the suffix " Bake".
Sioni's Rule of Drink: Avoid the 'House Special' Cocktail.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Two of my favourite sayings from other parts of the world are:
A big goat does not sneeze without reason
and
An egg never sits on a hen
Interesting how many of the sayings are ostensibly about animals but are really about, and incredibly appropriate for, human beings.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Never squat with your spurs on.
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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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no prophet's flag is set so...
Proceed to see sea
# 15560
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Posted
No act of kindness ever goes unpunished.
Better late than pregnant.
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Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
\_(ツ)_/
Posts: 11498 | From: Treaty 6 territory in the nonexistant Province of Buffalo, Canada ↄ⃝' | Registered: Mar 2010
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Tortuf
Ship's fisherman
# 3784
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Posted
If a frog had wings it wouldn't bump it's tail.
Posts: 6963 | From: The Venice of the South | Registered: Dec 2002
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rolyn
Shipmate
# 16840
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Posted
God helps those who help themselves .
God help you if you get caught helping yourself !
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Change is the only certainty of existence
Posts: 3206 | From: U.K. | Registered: Dec 2011
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North East Quine
Curious beastie
# 13049
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Posted
Ye maun open your spaver, ye maun open your pooch.
Literal translation - if you open the fly of your trousers, you open your wallet.
It means, don't have sex unless you are prepared to pay child maintenance.
Posts: 6414 | From: North East Scotland | Registered: Oct 2007
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
A person who gets all wrapped up in himself makes a mighty small package.
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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
It's not what you know
and it's not who you know.
It's what you know about who you know.
And knowing that they know you know it. ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Campbellite
Ut unum sint
# 1202
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Posted
They won't care what you know, until they know that you care.
Advice for new clergy
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I upped mine. Up yours.
Suffering for Jesus since 1966.
WTFWED?
Posts: 12001 | From: between keyboard and chair | Registered: Aug 2001
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W Hyatt
Shipmate
# 14250
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Posted
An old adage for engineers:
quote:
In theory, practice and theory are the same, but in practice they're not.
and from Karl Popper:
quote:
Whenever a theory appears to you as the only possible one, take this as a sign that you have neither understood the theory nor the problem which it was intended to solve.
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A new church and a new earth, with Spiritual Insights for Everyday Life.
Posts: 1565 | From: U.S.A. | Registered: Nov 2008
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Cast your bread upon the waters and you may get back a jam sandwich
soggy, perhaps...
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Oscar the Grouch
Adopted Cascadian
# 1916
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Posted
Never put off until tomorrow
something you can con another sucker into doing on your behalf today.
[ 04. September 2013, 07:47: Message edited by: Oscar the Grouch ]
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Faradiu, dundeibáwa weyu lárigi weyu
Posts: 3871 | From: Gamma Quadrant, just to the left of Galifrey | Registered: Dec 2001
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Zeke
Ship's Inquirer
# 3271
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Campbellite:
They won't care what you know, until they know that you care.
Advice for new clergy
This is also often given as advice for teachers.
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No longer the Bishop of Durham
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If men are so wicked with religion, what would they be without it? --Benjamin Franklin
Posts: 5259 | From: Deep in the American desert | Registered: Sep 2002
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Beautiful Dreamer
Shipmate
# 10880
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Posted
It takes 32 muscles to frown and 18 to smile, but only four to reach out bitch-slap the f***er on the head.
If I can't laugh at myself, I have no right to laugh at anyone else.
Don't blame another woman for stealing your man; blame him for being able to be stolen.
If a man can be stolen *by* you, he can also be stolen *from* you.
[ 20. September 2013, 03:24: Message edited by: Beautiful Dreamer ]
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More where that came from
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Posts: 6028 | From: Outside Atlanta, GA | Registered: Jan 2006
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