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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Ageing congregation? No problem, bring your grandchildren along
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Evensong
Shipmate
# 14696
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Posted
Many Christian parish congregations are facing the problem of an ageing church and no young people ( yadda, yadda ) and ministers are increasingly employed expecting that they will "grow the congregation" and "get more young people".
A Sudanese colleague recently asked: why don't the old people bring their grandchildren along?
Why not indeed? Give the overly stressed out parents a break by dropping the kids off with the grandparents and the grandparents take em to church.
Viola, you have young people and are discipling from an early age.
It seems so simply brilliant and advantageous to everyone that I'm immediately skeptical.
Would this work? Why or why not?
[ 17. October 2014, 10:02: Message edited by: Evensong ]
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a theological scrapbook
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The Phantom Flan Flinger
Shipmate
# 8891
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Posted
Don't see why it couldn't work - at least for some people - those who live near to their children / grandchildren, of course this frequently isn't the case.
You'd probably need to adapt your services etc - a church that appeals to the older generation is unlikely to appeal to their grandchildren, at lease in its current form.
having got grandparents and grandchildren into the congregation, the children may then follow, at least occasionally.
But then you'd need to adapt again....
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Posts: 1020 | From: Leicester, England | Registered: Dec 2004
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*Leon*
Shipmate
# 3377
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Posted
I know of a few people who bring their grandparents along whenever they've got them on Sunday. I've never seen anyone bring their grandchildren every Sunday.
I wonder whether many people think it's the job of the parents to decide whether the kids get dragged to church; to regularly bring the grandchildren to church would be impinging on your children's right to bring up their kids as agnostics.
Posts: 831 | From: london | Registered: Oct 2002
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Moo
Ship's tough old bird
# 107
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by *Leon*:
to regularly bring the grandchildren to church would be impinging on your children's right to bring up their kids as agnostics.
Not if the parents know where the grandparents intend to take them.
Moo
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Posts: 20365 | From: Alleghany Mountains of Virginia | Registered: May 2001
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womanspeak
Shipmate
# 15394
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Posted
In my last Anglican parish the only children coming regularly were with grandparents. The services were aimed at the seniors and the kids went to Sunday School.
We did introduce a monthly family service with kids talk which was building nicely but the new clergyman cancelled it and introduced 1662. Kids and grandparents left, and almost everybody else.
But when I finally gave up advocating for the missing generations and also left I found a number of these families at my next church (Uniting - Methodist/Presbyterian) where Sunday School is before church and worship is all age friendly.
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from the bush
Posts: 62 | From: rural australia | Registered: Jan 2010
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Boogie
Boogie on down!
# 13538
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Posted
Our (Methodist) Church has a thriving Sunday School - all grandchildren brought along by grandparents.
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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Garden. Room. Walk
Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008
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lily pad
Shipmate
# 11456
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by *Leon*:
I know of a few people who bring their grandparents along whenever they've got them on Sunday. I've never seen anyone bring their grandchildren every Sunday.
I wonder whether many people think it's the job of the parents to decide whether the kids get dragged to church; to regularly bring the grandchildren to church would be impinging on your children's right to bring up their kids as agnostics.
A lot of the parents are actually quite nostalgic about church and are glad that their children are able to go. Not having to go themselves is often seen as bonus time and if the children go for a sleepover at the grandparents' on the Saturday night, even better.
The trend toward grandparents bringing children to worship has been becoming more and more common. Several scholars have been studying it and many congregations are changing over their formation practices.
We've discussed this quite extensively on the Ship before. Of course, I can't locate the thread. Sigh.
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Sloppiness is not caring. Fussiness is caring about the wrong things. With thanks to Adeodatus!
Posts: 2468 | From: Truly Canadian | Registered: May 2006
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Snags
Utterly socially unrealistic
# 15351
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Posted
The suggestion from the OP makes a few sweeping assumptions, not least of which are that a) the older folk are physically fit enough to bring the grandchildren, and b) that the grandchildren actually live near enough to make it practical.
That said, it does happen; I know of some kids at our shack who are regularly brought along by the grandparents (and grandparents by their older grandkids!). But far more live in other towns/cities/countries.
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Posts: 1399 | From: just north of That London | Registered: Dec 2009
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Beeswax Altar
Shipmate
# 11644
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Posted
Some grandparents bring their grandchildren to church. Grandparents should offer to bring their unchurched grandchildren to church. However, asking grandparents to bring their grandchildren will not work as a strategy to grow the church and bring in young people.
One, the strategy assumes the churchgoing grandparent lives in the same town as their grandchildren. This is frequently not the case. In fact, people often cite visiting grandparents as one of the reasons for not bringing children to church in the first place.
Two, the grandchildren might not want to attend church. Church is boring to children. Hard to argue that its important when their parents don't attend. Not saying children never voluntarily attend church when their parents don't. Some obviously do.
Now, you could say but we will make church fun and interesting for children. This brings us to three. A church made up entirely of grandparents won't be willing or able to make the commitment to make church fun and interesting for children.
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Losing sleep is something you want to avoid, if possible.
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Posts: 8411 | From: By a large lake | Registered: Jul 2006
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Galilit
Shipmate
# 16470
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Posted
Why is it boring?
I didn't think it was boring when I was little. Couldn't get enough of it in fact.
Fought tooth and nail (unsucessfully) not to get shunted out to Sunday School which was indeed boring!
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She who does Her Son's will in all things can rely on me to do Hers.
Posts: 624 | From: a Galilee far, far away | Registered: Jun 2011
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Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528
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Posted
We do have parents bring grandchildren. Usually because the parents are working WAY more than any human being ought to.
Problems come in when Grandma or Granddad dies and the children suddenly disappear. Parents aren't willing or able to pick up the ball, and we don't have the transport to make it happen without them. ![[Waterworks]](graemlins/bawling.gif)
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Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!
Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004
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Arethosemyfeet
Shipmate
# 17047
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Galilit:
Why is it boring?
I didn't think it was boring when I was little. Couldn't get enough of it in fact.
Fought tooth and nail (unsucessfully) not to get shunted out to Sunday School which was indeed boring!
One thing I've learned as a teacher is that it's generally a bad idea to consider ones own experience as typical. If it were typical in this case then our churches would already be full, wouldn't they?
Posts: 2933 | From: Hebrides | Registered: Apr 2012
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Rosa Gallica officinalis
Shipmate
# 3886
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Posted
There's also the matter that the generation that are becoming grandparents in their 50s & 60s are not in church anyway. Most of our congregations can't bring their grandchildren because teenagers and young adults have opinions of their own about how to spend Sunday mornings.
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Come for tea, come for tea, my people.
Posts: 874 | From: The Hemlock Hideout | Registered: Jan 2003
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Galilit:
Why is it boring?
I didn't think it was boring when I was little. Couldn't get enough of it in fact.
Fought tooth and nail (unsucessfully) not to get shunted out to Sunday School which was indeed boring!
These discussions always have someone say this. Many, quite possibly most, kids do find it boring. Can we talk about them please?
[ 17. October 2014, 13:59: Message edited by: Karl: Liberal Backslider ]
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061
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Posted
There are excellent windows for children to come to church, which churches should exploit. Christmas, for instance. Or Easter.
My church has rammed the pedal to the metal on this one. Christmas is amazing -- the Living Nativity (camels, donkeys, Wise Men!), the collection of wrapped gifts for the homeless shelter downtown (mound of gifts as tall as I am), Williamsburg wreaths, poinsettias mounded around the altar, and half a dozen services with full carols. A search goes out in November of every year, for a young family to play the role of the Holy Family and get hauled down the aisle in full costume while 'Silent Night' is sung. It is way over the top, but it does bring 'em in.
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Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page
Posts: 6378 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Brenda - your church's Christmas tableau vivant sounds amazing.
We have something similar: newest baby born in the village is automatically roped in to be the Christ child, own parents being J&M. Sunday schoolers narrate and play parts of shepherds, angels, kings, etc.
Although all speaking parts are pre-allocated within the Sunday School there is an unwritten rule that any visiting child who wishes can take part so we have been known to have 40+ shepherds.
The donkey had to be retired - he didn't like children except as a foodstuff - but we now have alpaca instead.
Taking place on Christmas morning the church is a bit of a bear garden but we then have a simple communion service sung with carols 45 minutes later, which gives those parents and grandparents who wish to attend time to get the small fry back home before returning to church, if they wish.
We have grandparents who regularly bring children: some children go to Sunday School, others come to services. And Sunday School attend once a month plus things like Remembrance, Harvest, Palm Sunday and Easter, Rogation, Plough Sunday, etc.
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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