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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Famous BBC RSS Feed Headlines!
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Eutychus:
Day-Lewis makes Oscars history
Phew. Presumably that means we'll never have to put up with them again?
![[Killing me]](graemlins/killingme.gif) Not a bad idea at all, Eutychus!
* * * * * * *
Catholic church faces 'grave crisis'
Try cremation?
[ 26. February 2013, 17:43: Message edited by: Wesley J ]
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Eutychus
From the edge
# 3081
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Posted
Medical students job offers withdrawn after exam marking error
'nuff said ![[Mad]](angryfire.gif)
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Let's remember that we are to build the Kingdom of God, not drive people away - pastor Frank Pomeroy
Posts: 17944 | From: 528491 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
Fall in Festive Knife Crime Hailed
Sadly, gloomy knife crime rates remain unchanged.
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Annual shark kills 'hit 100 million'
WHAT!?? Let's rip, and rid humanity of them murderous beasts! Good grief! This just can't go on!
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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churchgeek
Have candles, will pray
# 5557
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Posted
OK, this wasn't an RSS feed, but rather a link a friend posted on facebook. However, when I read this headline:
West Michigan producer recalls 6,600 pounds of ham
my first thought, honestly, was of a record or video producer having memories of quite a lot of non-kosher meat!
Why I read "ham" literally (and correctly) when I read "producer" and "recalls" incorrectly, I don't know - maybe because a "ham" weighing 6,600 pounds would be well beyond the Guinness record book. And really, you wouldn't have to recall such a guy; you'd simply never forget him.
A bit of caffeine and I should be alright...
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I reserve the right to change my mind.
My article on the Virgin of Vladimir
Posts: 7773 | From: Detroit | Registered: Feb 2004
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
On a related subject, this from the BBC website:
Bacon crime drama gets second season
"This season: Who left the mysterious note reading 'Some Pig'?"
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Strange BBC headlines next to each other this morning:
Breath test 'spots stomach cancer'
Cregan 'put grenade in man's mouth'
Possibly to prevent him having a breath test? ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Eutychus
From the edge
# 3081
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Posted
Five questioned over missing student
It's been a while since we've had an Enid Blyton one...
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Let's remember that we are to build the Kingdom of God, not drive people away - pastor Frank Pomeroy
Posts: 17944 | From: 528491 | Registered: Jul 2002
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Eutychus:
Five questioned over missing student
It's been a while since we've had an Enid Blyton one...
I thought it meant this Five.
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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Tesco buys Giraffe restaurants
Horse meat is the new giraffe meat?
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Pearl B4 Swine
Ship's Oyster-Shucker
# 11451
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Wesley J:
Tesco buys Giraffe restaurants
Horse meat is the new giraffe meat?
How many restaurants does one Giraffe need?
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Oinkster
"I do a good job and I know how to do this stuff" D. Trump (speaking of the POTUS job)
Posts: 3622 | From: The Keystone State | Registered: May 2006
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Qoheleth.
Semi-Sagacious One
# 9265
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Posted
The front page headline of the April issue of the CofE's In Review :
quote:
Twenty year high for young priests
I'll have a bit of whatever's in that thurible.
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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The Benedictine Community at Alton Abbey offers a friendly, personal service for the exclusive supply of Rosa Mystica incense.
Posts: 2532 | From: the radiator of life | Registered: Apr 2005
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
On the Sky News mobile news headlines this afternoon:
"Bus Driver Has Close Shave With Huge Pole."
Posts: 25445 | Registered: May 2001
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ariel:
On the Sky News mobile news headlines this afternoon:
"Bus Driver Has Close Shave With Huge Pole."
Never tried a razor, has he?
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Ariel
Shipmate
# 58
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Posted
This is the beauty of that headline. There are so many possible interpretations. When I first saw it, I thought it referred to a huge Polish person. Not sure why it'd make headline news that the two of them would be shaving in unison, but maybe it was a slow news day.
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Stejjie
Shipmate
# 13941
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Posted
Kidney sacked as Ireland coach.
Liver expected to take over.
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A not particularly-alt-worshippy, fairly mainstream, mildly evangelical, vaguely post-modern-ish Baptist
Posts: 1117 | From: Urmston, Manchester, UK | Registered: Jul 2008
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
UK and Jordan sign Abu Qatada treaty
As long as Jordan makes him wear pink, I'm all for it. Who knows, she might even get him to sing...!
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Ariston
Insane Unicorn
# 10894
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Wesley J:
UK and Jordan sign Abu Qatada treaty
As long as Jordan makes him wear pink, I'm all for it. Who knows, she might even get him to sing...!
Congratulations, I think you may have found the only SFW page with pictures of Ms. Price on the entire Internet.
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“Therefore, let it be explained that nowhere are the proprieties quite so strictly enforced as in men’s colleges that invite young women guests, especially over-night visitors in the fraternity houses.” Emily Post, 1937.
Posts: 6849 | From: The People's Republic of Balcones | Registered: Jan 2006
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Stejjie
Shipmate
# 13941
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Posted
File under "I know what they meant, but...":
quote:
Storey targets return after birth
You mean she* was competing before she was born? These child prodigies are getting younger and younger...
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*'She' being Sarah Storey, Great British cyclist
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A not particularly-alt-worshippy, fairly mainstream, mildly evangelical, vaguely post-modern-ish Baptist
Posts: 1117 | From: Urmston, Manchester, UK | Registered: Jul 2008
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Eutychus
From the edge
# 3081
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Posted
Benefits of sun 'may outweigh risks'
Well yes. A little light and warmth seems useful.
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Let's remember that we are to build the Kingdom of God, not drive people away - pastor Frank Pomeroy
Posts: 17944 | From: 528491 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Hunt after wall collapses near hotel
Some people take every opportunity to go and kill critters. Haresy!
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Head 'spent £7k on own party'
Caught foot in the mouth. Not 'armless at all.
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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ArachnidinElmet
Shipmate
# 17346
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Posted
Cheese-rolling warnings ignored
If you're not careful it rolls right off your plate. The Health & Safety Executive advises cheese be firmly secured to a piece of toast.
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'If a pleasant, straight-forward life is not possible then one must try to wriggle through by subtle manoeuvres' - Kafka
Posts: 1887 | From: the rhubarb triangle | Registered: Sep 2012
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Palace 'on a hiding to nothing'
Have the Anti-Royalists finally won?
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Bank lending continues to shrink
At least a member of the medical profession still gets some bank cash.
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
Universities face challenges ahead
Hardly news. University Challenge* has been going for at least fifty years.
*TV quiz show
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Daily Mail in payout to psychic
They obviously didn't see that coming.
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Eutychus
From the edge
# 3081
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Posted
Teenager Edmund among beaten Brits
BBC reports from Narnia on younger brother's failure to oust High King Peter.
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Let's remember that we are to build the Kingdom of God, not drive people away - pastor Frank Pomeroy
Posts: 17944 | From: 528491 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
Root in line for Ashes opening spot
"Form an orderly queue there!"
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
Buddhist monks protest against Time
"...declare their support for Space."
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
This one isn't funny, but it deserves mention for its sheer failure to convey meaning:
Stabbed boy police find woman's body
And, no, it isn't missing a comma.
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
How would the addition of a comma clarify whatever meaning it was meant to convey?
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
From the Torygraph:
Chinese girls found dead after starving to death
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Amanda B. Reckondwythe:
How would the addition of a comma clarify whatever meaning it was meant to convey?
If it was "Stabbed boy, police find woman's body" I might have believed that a wounded boy and the police together found the body with the comma taking the place of the word "and." I have seen headlines use that sort of shorthand before even if it is not grammatically proper.
In this particular case, however, that was not the meaning they were trying to convey anyway, so that is why I said that it was not missing a comma.
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Hedgehog:
If it was "Stabbed boy, police find woman's body" I might have believed that a wounded boy and the police together found the body.
I think I'd prefer "Stabbed, boy police find woman's body", meaning that a juvenile peace officer, having been wounded by a knife, went on to discover the woman's body.
Or even "Stabbed? Boy! Police find woman's body", meaning that police found a woman's body -- and had she been stabbed? Oh, boy, I'll say she had!
Such fodder could probably engender a thread all its own.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
Here's the link from the BBC.
I don't think any amount of punctuation helps. "Police investigating stabbed boy find woman's body" is as succinct as I can make it, but that adds a whole word. No chance of me ever making sub-editor.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Leorning Cniht
Shipmate
# 17564
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sioni Sais:
I don't think any amount of punctuation helps. "Police investigating stabbed boy find woman's body" is as succinct as I can make it, but that adds a whole word. No chance of me ever making sub-editor.
"Woman's body found by stabbed boy cops" is a bit clearer than the original, but better, I think, is something like
Stabbed boy: Police find woman's body
or even Stabbed boy: Woman's body found - the fact that the body was found by the police is a trivial detail.
[ 02. July 2013, 21:37: Message edited by: Leorning Cniht ]
Posts: 5026 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2013
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
Concern over part-time student fall
Hope they landed OK.
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"He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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matthew_dixon
Shipmate
# 12278
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Posted
Grant among top bookings at reading festival
Yes, this is actually a festival of books and reading at Trafalgar Square, and is NOT as I first thought Hugh Grant headlining the annual rock music event the Reading Festival!
Posts: 321 | From: Cardiff | Registered: Jan 2007
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Warning over reading ages in Army
What!? No clue. Link here.
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Pearl B4 Swine
Ship's Oyster-Shucker
# 11451
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Wesley J:
Warning over reading ages in Army
What!? No clue. Link here.
I think it must be reading about 18 hours a day, and sleeping the rest of the time, which rankles the Army Officers.
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Oinkster
"I do a good job and I know how to do this stuff" D. Trump (speaking of the POTUS job)
Posts: 3622 | From: The Keystone State | Registered: May 2006
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Eutychus
From the edge
# 3081
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Posted
Lost ring found on Barrier Reef
Preciousssssssss...
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Let's remember that we are to build the Kingdom of God, not drive people away - pastor Frank Pomeroy
Posts: 17944 | From: 528491 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Duchess taken to hospital in labour
A good decision to join them. Much better than the Tory party. I think the populace will love her for this.
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
Woman takes horse into McDonald's
Bring your own burgers?
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Ann
Curious
# 94
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Posted
Cameron unveils online porn curbs - am I the only one who had to re-read that to make sure it didn't say "clubs"?
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Ann
Posts: 3271 | From: IO 91 PI | Registered: May 2001
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ann:
Cameron unveils online porn curbs - am I the only one who had to re-read that to make sure it didn't say "clubs"?
I was too busy trying to figure out why anyone would be arranging for curb service if it is online.
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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Wesley J
Silly Shipmate
# 6075
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Posted
German poster campaign to find Nazis
A bit late, perhaps. Not a big problem 70 or 80 years ago. - Or are they perhaps recruiting new ones?!
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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)
Posts: 7354 | From: The Isles of Silly | Registered: May 2004
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Hedgehog
Ship's Shortstop
# 14125
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Posted
Australia asylum shift 'troubling'
"I have to work at the asylum from 3:15 to 11:20? That's crazy!"
-or-
"You know, I think I want that 'troubling' to be about a foot more to the right..."
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"We must regain the conviction that we need one another, that we have a shared responsibility for others and the world, and that being good and decent are worth it."--Pope Francis, Laudato Si'
Posts: 2740 | From: Delaware, USA | Registered: Sep 2008
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