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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Crappy Choruses & Horrible Hymns redux
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Sinistærial
Ship's Lefty
# 5834
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Posted
It is amazing how much motivation that I get from working on my company's Fringe Benefit Tax return!
After finally reading the past twenty-two pages I feel that I can contribute another twenty-two!
Now for my first offering: what is it with the words in some hyongs?
Exibit A: quote:
God's promises are rainbows in the dark
What exactly does this mean? - God's promises do not exist?
- That they are figments of our imagination?
Exibit B: We had a new song called calvary
which has the line quote:
...our gain was heavens loss..
??? Heaven lost something when Christ died? - an empty status maybe but that is all!
Exibit C: from Jesus, lover of my soul. Maybe charismatic people have more faith than me but the line quote:
..though my world will fall I'll never let you go..
would be far better if the "I" and the "You" were swapped around (which we do in my ch__ch)
These hyongs have really great melody and some good lines - why do they screw it up with weird lines that make no sense?
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People laugh at me because I am different.
I laugh at other people because they are all the same.
æ = æ
Posts: 894 | From: The Holy City - Adelaide | Registered: Apr 2004
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Agent Smith
Shipmate
# 3299
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by quantpole:
quote:
Originally posted by A. Smith:
My least favourite Matt Redman song is the "dirge" Worthy. ![[brick wall]](graemlins/brick_wall.gif)
The verses are bearable but the chorus
"Worthy X lots
Much more worthy than i know!
Cant stand repetetive choruses. It sounds like a droning chorus!
Like Mr Townsend (sp?) stuff, especially the Blessed be your name - sounds like a "proper hymn"
I presume you mean Stuart Townend who has indeed written quite a few hymn-like songs in the past few years. I'm a bit confused though; Blessed Be Your Name is a Matt Redman one and couldn't really be described as a 'proper hymn'. Townend's most well known song is In Christ Alone - you might be thinking of something like that.
Sorry it was a Matt Redman song, it is unfortunately the closest thing we get to a hymn in my church. (Doh!)
I apologise for the inaccuracies in my previous post.
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"I'm so English, I am probably descended from a Cricket Bat and a cup of tea".
James May - 20th Century
http://www.flickr.com/photos/agentsmith1974/
Posts: 536 | From: Inside M25 | Registered: Sep 2002
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Karl: Liberal Backslider
Shipmate
# 76
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Posted
quote:
Sorry it was a Matt Redman song, it is unfortunately the closest thing we get to a hymn in my church. (Doh!)
You have my deepest sympathy.
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Might as well ask the bloody cat.
Posts: 17938 | From: Chesterfield | Registered: May 2001
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Sinisterial:
what is it with the words in some hyongs?
Dunno, but maybe its all explained here:
A major part of every lesson is Hyong
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Ken
L’amor che move il sole e l’altre stelle.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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wafer thin
Apprentice
# 9159
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Posted
Why when you go into an evangelical church they pick the worse chorus known in this world and the next, then you have to sing it a hundred times?????
Posts: 28 | From: bristol | Registered: Mar 2005
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Gill H
Shipmate
# 68
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Posted
So that you can remember the words well enough to post some of them here.
(But not enough of them to break copyright laws, of course.)
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*sigh* We can’t all be Alan Cresswell.
- Lyda Rose
Posts: 9313 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Auntie Doris
Screen Goddess
# 9433
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Posted
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
I have to sing at a wedding tomorrow. Went to a music practice tonight to find that the songs are..
- Love Divine (happy with that)
- Morning Has Broken (bearable but reminds me of school assemblies)
- Shine Jesus Shine(somebody kill me now!!) ![[Projectile]](graemlins/puke2.gif)
How on earth can I stand up the front of the church pretending to be all happy when I have to sing Shine Fricking Jesus Shine.
Help me ![[Help]](graemlins/help.gif)
Help me
Help me
Auntie Doris x
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"And you don't get to pronounce that I am not a Christian. Nope. Not in your remit nor power." - iGeek in response to a gay-hater :)
The life and times of a Guernsey cow
Posts: 6019 | From: The Rock at the Centre of the Universe | Registered: May 2005
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Bishops Finger
Shipmate
# 5430
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Posted
There is no escape from the Shiny Song......
Auntie D, are you still alive, or did you not survive the experience?
Ian J.
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Our words are giants when they do us an injury, and dwarfs when they do us a service. (Wilkie Collins)
Posts: 10151 | From: Behind The Wheel Again! | Registered: Jan 2004
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Auntie Doris
Screen Goddess
# 9433
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Posted
I did survive... but I didn't make it through Shine Jesus Fricking Shine without laughing. Luckily the little bridesmaid was running around the bride and groom at the time giggling, so I pretended I was laughing at her.
Nevertheless it wasn't a pretty experience. I am all Kendricked out for the coming year I think.
Auntie Doris x
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"And you don't get to pronounce that I am not a Christian. Nope. Not in your remit nor power." - iGeek in response to a gay-hater :)
The life and times of a Guernsey cow
Posts: 6019 | From: The Rock at the Centre of the Universe | Registered: May 2005
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Bishops Finger
Shipmate
# 5430
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Posted
Oh good - glad you made it!
'Morning has broken' is bad enough (though I like the tune - isn't there a proper hymn which is sometimes sung to it?) - and what the heck has that (or the Shiny Song) got to with a wedding anyway? I shudder to think of what the clergy have to go through......
Ian J.
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Our words are giants when they do us an injury, and dwarfs when they do us a service. (Wilkie Collins)
Posts: 10151 | From: Behind The Wheel Again! | Registered: Jan 2004
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Auntie Doris
Screen Goddess
# 9433
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Posted
God only knows what Shine Jesus Fricking Shine has to do with anything. Who am I to question tho? I was just there to sing and drink Bucks Fizz!! ![[Snigger]](graemlins/snigger.gif)
Auntie Doris x
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"And you don't get to pronounce that I am not a Christian. Nope. Not in your remit nor power." - iGeek in response to a gay-hater :)
The life and times of a Guernsey cow
Posts: 6019 | From: The Rock at the Centre of the Universe | Registered: May 2005
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Metapelagius
Shipmate
# 9453
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Posted
/quote 'Morning has broken' is bad enough (though I like the tune - isn't there a proper hymn which is sometimes sung to it?) /quote
Yes. 'Child in the manger', translated from the Gaelic 'Leanabh an aigh' of Mary Macdonald (1789 - 1872).
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Rec a archaw e nim naccer.
y rof a duv. dagnouet.
Am bo forth. y porth riet.
Crist ny buv e trist yth orsset.
Posts: 1032 | From: Hereabouts | Registered: May 2005
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Oscar the Grouch
Adopted Cascadian
# 1916
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Posted
There's also a really good Iona Community song, called "God the Creator", which uses the same tune (Bunessan).
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Faradiu, dundeibáwa weyu lárigi weyu
Posts: 3871 | From: Gamma Quadrant, just to the left of Galifrey | Registered: Dec 2001
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
What's wrong with Morning is Broken?
Its quite good, I thought. Not exactly an exposition of the entire Gospel in one song, but then what is?
Bunessan is a little town or village in Mull. The last place you pass through before you get to Fionnphort where you can get a boat to Iona. Its rather lovely.
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Ken
L’amor che move il sole e l’altre stelle.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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Pânts*
Ship's underwear
# 4487
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Posted
Should I be concerned that the only songs I know all the words to, and so consequently keep singing to Alien are crappy choruses?!?! ![[Disappointed]](graemlins/disappointed.gif) ![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
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I'm not here any more. Dial 999 to get me. (No. Please don't really. Bit you could PM me on my new number cos I never get PMs!)
Posts: 8380 | From: The Stables | Registered: May 2003
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Carys
Ship's Celticist
# 78
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Pânts:
Should I be concerned that the only songs I know all the words to, and so consequently keep singing to Alien are crappy choruses?!?!
Yes!
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O Lord, you have searched me and know me
You know when I sit and when I rise
Posts: 6896 | From: Bryste mwy na thebyg | Registered: May 2001
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Janine
The Endless Simmer
# 3337
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Posted
Nope.
Sing them with great gusto and extreme facial experessions. Good mental stimulation for the Alien.
Or, when it's sleepy-snuggly time, sing the most banal or bloodthirsty words sweetly and softly and send her off to Dreamland with 'em.
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I'm a Fundagelical Evangimentalist. What are you?
Take Me Home * My Heart * An hour with Rich Mullins *
Posts: 13788 | From: Below the Bible Belt | Registered: Sep 2002
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Papio
Ship's baboon
# 4201
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by ken:
What's wrong with Morning is Broken?
Its quite good, I thought. Not exactly an exposition of the entire Gospel in one song, but then what is?
The tune makes my ears hurt.
And lyrically, I always thought it was rather twee and santimonous.
[ 21. June 2005, 16:35: Message edited by: Papio. ]
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Infinite Penguins.
My "Readit, Swapit" page
My "LibraryThing" page
Posts: 12176 | From: a zoo in England. | Registered: Mar 2003
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MSHB
Shipmate
# 9228
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Papio.:
quote:
Originally posted by ken:
What's wrong with Morning is Broken?
Its quite good, I thought. Not exactly an exposition of the entire Gospel in one song, but then what is?
The tune makes my ears hurt.
And lyrically, I always thought it was rather twee and santimonous.
"Morning is broken
Can't fix it up again..."
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MSHB: Member of the Shire Hobbit Brigade
Posts: 1522 | From: Dharawal Country | Registered: Mar 2005
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
Souless, souless, the lot of you. Being nasty to poor Eleanor Farjeon like that.
Next you'll be telling me you don't like Christina Rossetti.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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Roseofsharon
Shipmate
# 9657
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Posted
I registered with SoF today, and thought this topic looked like a good place to start.
I started at the beginning, and have been on here for FOUR HOURS!...Have just reached the bottom of page 8, and must go to bed!
I have no idea how long it is going to be before I catch up with the rest of you, but it's been fun tagging along behind you.
Rose
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Talk about books -any books- on our rejuvenatedforum http://www.bookgrouponline.com/index.php?
Posts: 3060 | From: Sussex By The Sea | Registered: Jun 2005
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Auntie Doris
Screen Goddess
# 9433
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Posted
Hi RoseofSharon,
I think that when I joined this was one of the first threads I looked at. I laughed at it for hours and hours.
Nice avatar too ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
Auntie Doris x
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"And you don't get to pronounce that I am not a Christian. Nope. Not in your remit nor power." - iGeek in response to a gay-hater :)
The life and times of a Guernsey cow
Posts: 6019 | From: The Rock at the Centre of the Universe | Registered: May 2005
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Roseofsharon
Shipmate
# 9657
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by dorothea:
sing-along version of the Lord's prayer reminds me of a poem I used to like at primary School. The poem ended.
"Amen, amen, amen, amen.
Timothy Winters, Lord. Amen!"
"Timothy Winters" by Charles Causley...my favourite poem
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Posts: 3060 | From: Sussex By The Sea | Registered: Jun 2005
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Roseofsharon
Shipmate
# 9657
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Boopy:
many not ostensibly religious poems may be so if you choose to read them that way; that decision often lies with the reader. Boopy;)
..."that decision often lies with the reader."....Which, of course, also applies to the singer/listener when deriding the crappy choruse and hideous hymns.
The distorted meanings, and warped images come from our own imaginations...we are not innocent bystanders! ![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
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Posts: 3060 | From: Sussex By The Sea | Registered: Jun 2005
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Roseofsharon
Shipmate
# 9657
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by dorothea:
Newman's Own wrote:
quote:
I'm very familiar with many mystic writings (and naturally the scriptures) which use erotic imagery, but what I find so hilarious about the "I want to have sex with Jesus" imagery today is that those using it in their compositions seem not to see the erotic implications at all.
Totally hillarious!! It's as if these people both writers and those who promote this type of stuff have undergone an irony bypass. Quite a number of times, I've accidently turned up at 'praise' service - to find myself grinning my head off in the songs, not because I am enraputured but because I'm ******* my sides.
There's something risible about innocence?... See my previous post about the contribution of the singer/listener.
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Posts: 3060 | From: Sussex By The Sea | Registered: Jun 2005
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Roseofsharon
Shipmate
# 9657
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Robin:
Simon was a rebel
Jesus loved him still
and replaced his dagger
with a daffodil
I confess to providing my own inappropriate mental image when I read this. ![[Hot and Hormonal]](icon_redface.gif)
[edited to fix UBB]
[ 29. June 2005, 12:06: Message edited by: TonyK ]
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Talk about books -any books- on our rejuvenatedforum http://www.bookgrouponline.com/index.php?
Posts: 3060 | From: Sussex By The Sea | Registered: Jun 2005
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Ann
Curious
# 94
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Posted
Roseofsharon,
Glad you like the thread, welcome to the Ship and all that. The thing that brought me to the Ship was a similar thread on the original boards, many years ago now. Otherwise I'd have probably thought, "Oh yes, a vaguely interesting religious site." when I followed a link here and forgotten all about the site within the week.
Unfortunately, the original boards are either lost or very difficult to find, but these boards have an area called "Limbo" where old threads go when they die if they've been good. One of the Limbo threads is the one of which this is the Redux. If you want to waste more time ...
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Ann
Posts: 3271 | From: IO 91 PI | Registered: May 2001
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Alaric the Goth
Shipmate
# 511
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Posted
As the starter of the original thread, I am very plesed it has given so much pleasure to so many people that this (redux thread) is now 23 pages long! ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
Posts: 3322 | From: West Thriding | Registered: Jun 2001
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Gill H
Shipmate
# 68
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Posted
I started one many moons ago called 'Musical irreverence' which wasn't so much a rant, more a giggle. That went on for a long while.
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*sigh* We can’t all be Alan Cresswell.
- Lyda Rose
Posts: 9313 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Gill H
Shipmate
# 68
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Posted
Must ... resist ... Limbo thread.
I've stopped after 4 pages 'cause I need to get some work done. What a laugh.
I'd forgotten about my 'It's pants and it breaks my heart' parody. And Alexandra's 'Jesus loves me' parody too. (Wish she'd come back - she was a wonderful writer.)
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*sigh* We can’t all be Alan Cresswell.
- Lyda Rose
Posts: 9313 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Roseofsharon
Shipmate
# 9657
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Ann:
If you want to waste more time ...
Noooo! I've only just made it here.
Apart from a few hours at work, I've been here all day ![[Snore]](graemlins/snore.gif)
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Talk about books -any books- on our rejuvenatedforum http://www.bookgrouponline.com/index.php?
Posts: 3060 | From: Sussex By The Sea | Registered: Jun 2005
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Roseofsharon
Shipmate
# 9657
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by M.:
..... It contains the priceless line,
'With God things just don't happen'....
It makes better sense if you put the words in the right order:-
With God things don't just happen
Or to emphasise the point. use quotation marks:
With God things don't "just happen"
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Posts: 3060 | From: Sussex By The Sea | Registered: Jun 2005
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M.
Ship's Spare Part
# 3291
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Posted
Roseofsharon posted:
quote:
It makes better sense if you put the words in the right order:-
With God things don't just happen
Or to emphasise the point. use quotation marks:
With God things don't "just happen"
Yes, I assumed that that is what is meant; although it's inelegant, it does make more sense.
However, the words I was taught at church, that we had written down and that most people sang (I used actually to change the order to make sense when I sang it, but I was alone) were as I quoted them.
M.
Posts: 2303 | From: Lurking in Surrey | Registered: Sep 2002
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Evensnog
Shipmate
# 8017
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Posted
From today's slightly early July 4th service, I think it's called 'This is my Song':
My country's skies are bluer than the ocean
And sunlight beams on cloverleaf and pine;
But other lands have sunlight too, and clover,
And skies are everywhere as blue as mine.
Posts: 507 | From: Silicon Valley | Registered: Jul 2004
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RuthW
liberal "peace first" hankie squeezer
# 13
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by GloriaGloriaGloria:
From today's slightly early July 4th service, I think it's called 'This is my Song':
My country's skies are bluer than the ocean
And sunlight beams on cloverleaf and pine;
But other lands have sunlight too, and clover,
And skies are everywhere as blue as mine.
Yes, sung to the tune Finlandia. They had this at the church I work for this morning, along with a rewritten version of "America" and some other terribly PC thing. Gag.
Posts: 24453 | From: La La Land | Registered: Apr 2001
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AngelicR
Apprentice
# 7930
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Posted
Lovely thread, has made me chuckle out loud!
I myself fell victim recently, during a rendition of 'It's all out you' (not an all time favourite...) I caught myself singing a slightly alternative chorus of "It's all about shoes, Jeee-sus".
Whoopsie!
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This too will pass
Posts: 23 | From: UK | Registered: Jul 2004
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AngelicR
Apprentice
# 7930
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Posted
Sorry!
Of course the song is 'It's all ABout you'. Preview Post may well be my friend, but he's a bloomin useless one until I learn to read properly!
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This too will pass
Posts: 23 | From: UK | Registered: Jul 2004
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Master Tubby Bear
Shipmate
# 9739
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Posted
A few observations from n years as a church pianist:-
1. Give thanks with a grateful heart = Go West/One nil to the Ar-se-nal/Pachelbel's Canon
2. There's a song with the chorus "And I worship you/I give my life to you/I fall down at your feet" where the opening bars of the chorus bear an uncanny resemblance to the theme tune to Blake's 7
3. the vegetarian's chorus: "There's a fight to be fought and a race to be run/there are dangers to meet by the way"
4. the baker's chorus - My Jesus my Saviour - "Icing for joy..."
5. which moron put the words of "God is our strength and refuge" to the Dambusters theme? Can't sign it now without thinking of black and white films and/or that Carling Black Label advert
Have just realised that not much of the above makes sense unless you are a middle class male living in the UK. oops.
Lots of love
The Tubbster
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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In every I Love You there is a Goodbye
Posts: 391 | From: London, England | Registered: Jul 2005
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Master Tubby Bear
Shipmate
# 9739
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Posted
oops x 2 - meant to say "middle AGED male". let's not get into what class distinctions bring to bear in musical taste.
MTB
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In every I Love You there is a Goodbye
Posts: 391 | From: London, England | Registered: Jul 2005
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Trini
Shipmate
# 7921
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by AngelicR:
Lovely thread, has made me chuckle out loud!
I myself fell victim recently, during a rendition of 'It's all out you' (not an all time favourite...) I caught myself singing a slightly alternative chorus of "It's all about shoes, Jeee-sus".
Whoopsie!
On Sunday, we were introduced to a new 'chorus' which included the line "I've seen the latest fashions" and goes on to say how much better our Lord, King and Creator of the Universe is, than the latest shoes. Talk about damning with faint praise!
Posts: 816 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Jul 2004
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testbear
Shipmate
# 4602
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by AngelicR:
Lovely thread, has made me chuckle out loud!
I myself fell victim recently, during a rendition of 'It's all about you' (not an all time favourite...) I caught myself singing a slightly alternative chorus of "It's all about shoes, Jeee-sus".
Whoopsie!
Better that than the friend of mine who would get the whole emphasis of the song everso slightly wrong - "It's all about meeee...Jeee-sus"
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"If you really believe what you say you believe / you wouldn't be so damn reckless with the words you speak"
Posts: 127 | From: a town where you can't smell a thing | Registered: Jun 2003
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Gill H
Shipmate
# 68
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Posted
Trini - you don't remember any lyrics, do you?
Imagining some dreadful pun on Jimmy Choos/Him we choose ... ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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*sigh* We can’t all be Alan Cresswell.
- Lyda Rose
Posts: 9313 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Gill H
Shipmate
# 68
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Posted
One quick Google later ...
Was it this?
Upside Down
I like my pun better.
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*sigh* We can’t all be Alan Cresswell.
- Lyda Rose
Posts: 9313 | From: London | Registered: May 2001
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Trini
Shipmate
# 7921
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Posted
No, that isn't it. (Scary to think there are more in that vein.)
I wasn't paying much attention to the song but the comparison of God to fashion woke me up. Not surprisingly, that's the only line I can remember. There weren't any actual references to shoes but the line I quoted is word for word, from the song.
I've written a friendly note about it to our worship leader because I really think it's an insulting song. I mean, if I created the world and someone said, "gee, you're cooler than Armani" I think I would be miffed. It was especially funny coming right before the very traditional "This is my Father's world".
Now, you have me wondering what they rhymed with "fashions"...
Posts: 816 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Jul 2004
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Ricardus
Shipmate
# 8757
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Posted
In the same vomit-inducing line of damning with faint praise: I nominate the children's song that was inflicted on us last Sunday.
My memory has formed a protective seal over the details, but the chorus was something like: Jesus, you're my superhero / better than Superman / better than Spiderman / better than Barbie / better than Action Man.
Why do some lyricists think you can switch your brain off just because you're writing for children? As Trini says, you wouldn't get away with saying that sort of thing if you were trying to praise a real person:
quote:
Hail, our Sovereign Elizabeth, by God's grace Queen of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, Duke of Lancaster, defender of the faith, paragon of the charms and virtues and glorious even beyond the Barbie dolls!
or
quote:
My darling, shall I compare you to a summer's day? You are more lovely and more temperate; more beautiful even than Barbie, for only your breast implants are made of plastic.
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Then the dog ran before, and coming as if he had brought the news, shewed his joy by his fawning and wagging his tail. -- Tobit 11:9 (Douai-Rheims)
Posts: 7247 | From: Liverpool, UK | Registered: Nov 2004
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Songs of Praise
Shipmate
# 8435
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Posted
Has anyone yet mentioned those horrid 'question and answer' evangelical choruses, where the men either always lead (natch) or, most horrifically, provide the answers to the women's questions.
Such as Lift up your heads, O ye gates (the king of glory shall come in), thus:
Women: Who is the king of glory? What is his name? (i.e. Oh no, we've forgotten already, our heads are so full of kittens and knitting)
Men: We are the men and we know all the answers in this case!
Or something like that.
Posts: 94 | From: a distance | Registered: Sep 2004
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Trudy Scrumptious
BBE Shieldmaiden
# 5647
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Posted
Is the "it's all about you Jesus" one Heart of Worship? Because that has to be the single most unsingable song ever, from a congregational point of view -- closely followed by "Shout to the Lord" -- and this coming from someone who genuinely enjoys most Praise and Worship choruses. "Shout to the Lord" I do like if it's performed, but not for congregational singing. "Heart of Worship" is just dirgelike and the lyrics are annoying.
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Books and things.
I lied. There are no things. Just books.
Posts: 7428 | From: Closer to Paris than I am to Vancouver | Registered: Mar 2004
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AngelicR
Apprentice
# 7930
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Posted
quote:
Is the "it's all about you Jesus" one Heart of Worship? Because that has to be the single most unsingable song ever
The very same. I find it too distracting, and not matter how hard I concentrate always end up lapsing into shoe worship... maybe an important lesson in discipline in worship!?
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This too will pass
Posts: 23 | From: UK | Registered: Jul 2004
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seasick
...over the edge
# 48
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Posted
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Songs of Praise said:
Has anyone yet mentioned those horrid 'question and answer' evangelical choruses, where the men <snip> provide the answers to the women's questions.
Such as Lift up your heads, O ye gates (the king of glory shall come in), thus:
Women: Who is the king of glory? What is his name? (i.e. Oh no, we've forgotten already, our heads are so full of kittens and knitting)
Men: We are the men and we know all the answers in this case!
Or something like that.
Otherwise, the women would be teaching the men, and that would be Bad™.
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We believe there is, and always was, in every Christian Church, ... an outward priesthood, ordained by Jesus Christ, and an outward sacrifice offered therein. - John Wesley
Posts: 5769 | From: A world of my own | Registered: May 2001
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