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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: The Shiny New Limericks Thread
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Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356
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Posted
The next day it's Tuesday; and then
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My beard is a testament to my masculinity and virility, and demonstrates that I am a real man. Trouble is, bits of quiche sometimes get caught in it.
Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Half-way through the week
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
Tomorrow it's Monday again
The next day it's Tuesday; and then
Half-way through the week
When my clothes start to reek
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
I start to hanker for the coming weekend!
When cruising the mean streets in my jeep
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
I spied Chrysler Corp.'s head veep.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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ArachnidinElmet
Shipmate
# 17346
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Posted
with a peach and a mango
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'If a pleasant, straight-forward life is not possible then one must try to wriggle through by subtle manoeuvres' - Kafka
Posts: 1887 | From: the rhubarb triangle | Registered: Sep 2012
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
And uttering nary a peep.
While racing along in my Ford,
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
The speedo registered a ton
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Sir Kevin
Ship's Gaffer
# 3492
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Posted
And driving was very much fun;
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If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Writing is currently my hobby, not yet my profession.
Posts: 30517 | From: White Hart Lane | Registered: Oct 2002
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
But I now find I'm terribly bored.
The squirrel stole nuts from my tree
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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The5thMary
Shipmate
# 12953
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Posted
As I shouted "fiddle dee dee!"
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God gave me my face but She let me pick my nose.
Posts: 3451 | From: Tacoma, WA USA | Registered: Aug 2007
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
And regretted not having my tea.
A silly old geezer named Rufus
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
Just for giggles, decided to spoof us.
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
To perform his multi tasks
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
The best one was totally toofless.
There was a small infant from Staines
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Who only wore diapers by Haines.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
He blubbered in Pampers
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
And suckled on champers
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356
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Posted
Chased down with the odd pint of Brains!
A visionary artist from Cookham
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My beard is a testament to my masculinity and virility, and demonstrates that I am a real man. Trouble is, bits of quiche sometimes get caught in it.
Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
She was so horrific
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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pimple
Ship's Irruption
# 10635
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Posted
that every prolific
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In other words, just because I made it all up, doesn't mean it isn't true (Reginald Hill)
Posts: 8018 | From: Wonderland | Registered: Nov 2005
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
Work was condemned, so they took 'em.
There was a blow fly on the wall
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Who made his home in a gents' stall.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
The sights that he saw
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
Surely against the law
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
were things that must have come from The Fall.
* * * *
When cycling along on the flat
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
I suddenly noticed a cat
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
sleeping, of course,
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
and sporting a flowery hat.
While travelling abroad on my hols
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356
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Posted
I got drunk with a couple of Poles
Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008
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L'organist
Shipmate
# 17338
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Posted
Triple vodkas all round
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Rara temporum felicitate ubi sentire quae velis et quae sentias dicere licet
Posts: 4950 | From: somewhere in England... | Registered: Sep 2012
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
Then the horrible sound...
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
Of two angry and roaring pink trolls!
An outdoor reared piglet who strayed
[ 01. October 2014, 16:04: Message edited by: Raptor Eye ]
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
But he needn't have fretted
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
as he was abetted
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
| IP: Logged
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
by drinking some pink lemonade.
There once was a bloke from Kincardine
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Who looked like Osama bin Laden
[assuming my pronunciation is correct, sorry if not]
[ 02. October 2014, 14:18: Message edited by: TheAlethiophile ]
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I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
He tried a disguise
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
cov'ring all but his eyes
[tangent] Spot on, Alethiophile! [/tangent]
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356
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Posted
And resembled instead Graeme Garden!
As I strolled through the streets of Caerphilly
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My beard is a testament to my masculinity and virility, and demonstrates that I am a real man. Trouble is, bits of quiche sometimes get caught in it.
Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008
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rolyn
Shipmate
# 16840
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Posted
I saw a frog sat on a lily
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Change is the only certainty of existence
Posts: 3206 | From: U.K. | Registered: Dec 2011
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