Source: (consider it)
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Thread: The Shiny New Limericks Thread
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Discussion was frank
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
 Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
[Drat the surprise new page]
At the Council of Chalcedon Some things were said that were needin'. Discussion was frank All the way to the bank
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
as the goldfish would always need feeding
A Roman soldier walked into Asda
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Having travelled thus far in his Mazda ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
The guy stuck his neck out
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
And asked her to work a bit faster.
A ginger cat walked into a bar
-------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
And got it chopped off with a panga.
Anopheles, the famous Ashanti general,
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
........sorry, I withdraw!
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
A ginger cat walked into a bar And ordered a tot of cold tar
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
With which to anoint
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
A cutie blue point [ 14. May 2015, 10:36: Message edited by: Welease Woderwick ]
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Belonging to Hedy Lamarr.
My head of department's a clot
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
A genius of admin he's not
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
He forgot our checks
-------------------- Blessed Gator, pray for us! --"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon") --"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
While petty cash adds to his pot.
Now spring is the time I adore
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
 Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
But summer I really deplore!
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
And autumn's just damp
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
While winter's so camp
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
My kingdom for only a groat
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
In fact, 'twas a horse
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
 Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
And he spake it, of course,
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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pimple
 Ship's Irruption
# 10635
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Posted
In the pub, with a very sore throat.
Now that bishops are better informed
-------------------- In other words, just because I made it all up, doesn't mean it isn't true (Reginald Hill)
Posts: 8018 | From: Wonderland | Registered: Nov 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
There only remains
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
The cleansing of stains
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
before the Church Rampant is stormed!
* * * *
When dining out one Saturday night
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Between sheriff and thief
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
 Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
But was given much grief
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
as my dinner suit was much too tight
I made my way back to McDonalds
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
To be served by a couple - both Ronalds
(Good luck, all who follow here)
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
It wasn't the service
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Which made me so nervice
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
But the Burger King paper coronals.
At the airport security check-in
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
A guard and a pilot were neckin'.
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
But 'twas not the lipstick
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Nor even the dipstick
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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pimple
 Ship's Irruption
# 10635
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Posted
That made the stuck pair call a tech in.
The infinite love of the Vicar
-------------------- In other words, just because I made it all up, doesn't mean it isn't true (Reginald Hill)
Posts: 8018 | From: Wonderland | Registered: Nov 2005
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
Was more than enough for this sinner
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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Welease Woderwick
 Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
He loved me all night
-------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Meike
Shipmate
# 3006
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Posted
I did not requite [ 24. May 2015, 14:22: Message edited by: Meike ]
-------------------- “A god who let us prove his existence would be an idol” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Posts: 250 | From: I like this place | Registered: Jul 2002
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
And kept him well outside my knicker.
To me, the geum Mrs. Bradshaw
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Kwesi
Shipmate
# 10274
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Posted
Is a genus one cannot ignore
Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005
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jacobsen
 seeker
# 14998
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Posted
Her petals so bright
-------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
And no sight of blight
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
It's a cottage garden plant to adore.
A parrot who spoke fluent French
-------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
made a rude comment to Judi Dench
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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