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» Ship of Fools   »   » Oblivion   » The Shiny New Limericks Thread (Page 66)

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Source: (consider it) Thread: The Shiny New Limericks Thread
jrw
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a liquorice stick
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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
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he got from a hick

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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Kwesi
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'Twas a marriage he could not abide.

Delilah had a hair-stylist's penchant

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jrw
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said Samson, the now bald defendant
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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
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she wields a bold blade

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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Raptor Eye
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To increase his malaise

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
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and now he's become quite dependent!

* * * *

In Leafy Surrey today

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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Sipech
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Some couples were ruffling hay

--------------------
I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile

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Raptor Eye
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Which caused them to sneeze

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
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amidst all the sleaze

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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Raptor Eye
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A kerfuffle which gave them away.

A man with a pencil moustache

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

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Stetson
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Displayed it in Vegas for cash.

--------------------
I have the power...Lucifer is lord!

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
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he didn't make much

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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jacobsen

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So tried for a touch

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

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Welease Woderwick

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but was arrested and his life turned to ash.

* * * *

When driving from London to Leeds

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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jacobsen

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Consider your bodily needs

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
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always take along

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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kingsfold

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a giraffe and a bong

--------------------
I came to Jesus and I found in him my star, my sun.
And in that light of life I'll walk 'til travelling days are done


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Stetson
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and packets of contraband seeds.

An exorcist said to an imp

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Raptor Eye
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"On yer bike, you pesky wee wimp!"

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

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jacobsen

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I've looked in the Bible

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

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jrw
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and I've not had my trifle
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Welease Woderwick

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In my style you're putting a crimp!

* * * *

There was a young lady from Utah

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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jacobsen

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Who had an overgrown hootah

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

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pjl
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Always poking her nose in
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Raptor Eye
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Thinking it was no sin

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

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jacobsen

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The only thing left was to shootah.


However, she mended her ways

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

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jrw
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after being stranded for 5 days
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Welease Woderwick

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on an isle in the sun

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

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Raptor Eye
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Where she learned to have fun

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

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Stetson
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As she frolicked 'round naked in leis.

A cop while out searching for speeders

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jacobsen

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Was distracted by filling bird feeders

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

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jrw
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Whilst chasing a worm
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Golden Key
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Leapt over a berm

--------------------
Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
jacobsen

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Ignoring the speeding fine pleaders.


To the rain I admonish: "depart!"

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

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Stetson
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But the weatherman points to his chart...
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Raptor Eye
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The clouds are now forming

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

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jacobsen

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And soon 'twill be storming

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged
jrw
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My cycle ride plans fall apart

"I'll visit the Arndale instead

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Raptor Eye
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I might buy a comfy new bed

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

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jacobsen

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So vital is sleep

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged
Golden Key
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And counting lost sheep

--------------------
Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Sipech
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So, to the world, I appear to be dead

As fireworks go pop and bang

--------------------
I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile

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Raptor Eye
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The old man in the doorway, he sang

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged
kingsfold

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of catherine wheels

--------------------
I came to Jesus and I found in him my star, my sun.
And in that light of life I'll walk 'til travelling days are done


Posts: 4473 | From: land of the wee midgie | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged
Golden Key
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# 1468

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And Baldur who kneels

--------------------
Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
jacobsen

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# 14998

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And the angels in heaven, who sang.


It has rained here non-stop for two days

--------------------
But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged
Curiosity killed ...

Ship's Mug
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The skies display a palette of greys

--------------------
Mugs - Keep the Ship afloat

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pjl
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But it's great for the ducks
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Welease Woderwick

Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424

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In Herts, Berks & Bucks

--------------------
I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details

What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?

Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged



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