Thread closed      Thread closed My profile login | | Directory | Search | FAQs | Board home   Printer-friendly view   » Ship of Fools   »   » Oblivion   » The Shiny New Limericks Thread (Page 67) Email this page to a friend or enemy.   Pages in this thread: 1  2  3  ...  64  65  66  67  68    Source: (consider it) Thread: The Shiny New Limericks Thread jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     But not quite so healthy in Grays* * a place in Essex To what do I owe this great pleasure? -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    You poured out a generous measure -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     But I'd rather drink GIN [tangent] Not only is Grays a place in Essex it is also the Birthplace of Wonderful Welease Woderwick! I am told that the local authorities have still failed to erect a statue in my honour [/tangent] [ 08. November 2015, 00:37: Message edited by: Welease Woderwick ] -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     To what do I owe this great pleasure? You poured out a generous measure I'd rather drink GIN - Pigwidgeon, come in! -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    Join us, and stretch out a feather! A caterpillar, as it munched on a leaf -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     Said, "Gardeners call me a thief" -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     "but think, when I grow -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged jrw Shipmate # 18045 Posted                    I will put on a show Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     of beauty quite beyond belief!" * * * * When Luther nailed his note to the door -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged Sipech Shipmate # 16870 Posted                       He showed the pope's doctrine was poor -------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     but the prelate in Rome -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    Went off of his dome -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged Stetson Shipmate # 9597 Posted                    And shouted "Indulgences! More!" A crooner, while working the room Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     Sang purely of gloom and of doom -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Kwesi Shipmate # 10274 Posted                     Of love unrequited Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     And children affrighted -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    He was drowned out by a big sonic boom! A lady who borrowed a book -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged Sipech Shipmate # 16870 Posted                       Gave it back after just a brief look -------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     She found that soft porn -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    Only brought on a yawn -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged jrw Shipmate # 18045 Posted                    and that it was much more fun to cook She decided to try a new recipe Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     Involving a leek and copious green pea -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Stetson Shipmate # 9597 Posted                    Plus a helping of pork Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    And served up on cork -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged Sipech Shipmate # 16870 Posted                       Made her guests all squeal with glee. There once was a moron called Boris -------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged pjl Shipmate # 16929 Posted                     Who dated a thicko named Doris Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012  |  IP: Logged Baptist Trainfan Shipmate # 15128 Posted                     He claimed he was Mayor Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    And sat in a posh chair -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged jrw Shipmate # 18045 Posted                    He had lots which fell from backs of lorries A scandal arose in the media Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     Whose primary source was Wickopedia [ 13. November 2015, 09:45: Message edited by: jacobsen ] -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Kwesi Shipmate # 10274 Posted                     It wasn't the bung Posts: 1641 | From: South Ofankor | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged Stetson Shipmate # 9597 Posted                    Who got 'em all hung Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    The truth was a whole lot seedier. As the lady powdered her nose -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged Stetson Shipmate # 9597 Posted                    She noticed a man with no clothes. -------------------- I have the power...Lucifer is lord! Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     Her heart gave a bound -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     but she uttered no sound -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged jrw Shipmate # 18045 Posted                    as she hid herself in an alcove She'd entered the gents by mistake Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     that's one anyone can make -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     Too late to back out -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Sipech Shipmate # 16870 Posted                       She fashioned a spout -------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     And promptly ejected a lake. Oh dammit, my ankle is broken Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     yet nary a word has been spoken -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     The AA* took ages *Automobile Association - rescue -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     [they're in the Yellow Pages] -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     Insurance will pay but a token. I now need to find a new car -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     I'll ask a friend I know from the bar -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged jacobsen seeker # 14998 Posted                     Just one with four wheels -------------------- But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy The man who made time, made plenty. Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009  |  IP: Logged Welease Woderwick Sister Incubus Nightmare # 10424 Posted                     he'll know some good deals -------------------- I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way. Fancy a break in South India? Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand? Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged Raptor Eye Shipmate # 16649 Posted                    I'm hoping to go very far. It wasn't the nicest of days -------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10 Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged jrw Shipmate # 18045 Posted                    when I found myself lost in the maze Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged Pages in this thread: 1  2  3  ...  64  65  66  67  68         Thread closed         Printer-friendly view Go to: Select a board: Category: Ship's business -------------------- The Styx Category: Community discussion -------------------- Heaven Purgatory Hell All Saints Category: Special interest discussion -------------------- Ecclesiantics Kerygmania The Circus Dead Horses The Eighth Day Category: Ship's Locker -------------------- Glory Limbo Category: Things we did -------------------- Nativity Play Auctions The Laugh Judgment The Da Vinci Code Chapter & Worse Contact us | Ship of Fools | Privacy statement © Ship of Fools 2016 UBB.classicTM 6.5.0