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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: The Shiny New Limericks Thread
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
And items from various lepers
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
quote:
There was once a fair maiden from Bognor
Who cooked great spaghetti bologna
But her use of hot peppers
And items from various lepers
Combined, made her spectacles fog more.
On Pentecost, the vicar wore red panties
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
red girdle and various fancies
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
And to top it all off
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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Doublethink.
Ship's Foolwise Unperson
# 1984
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Posted
To dance the fandango in scanties.
[ 09. June 2014, 17:35: Message edited by: Doublethink ]
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All political thinking for years past has been vitiated in the same way. People can foresee the future only when it coincides with their own wishes, and the most grossly obvious facts can be ignored when they are unwelcome. George Orwell
Posts: 19219 | From: Erehwon | Registered: Aug 2005
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
Next line, Doublethink?
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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Doublethink.
Ship's Foolwise Unperson
# 1984
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Posted
Oops, sorry the dipsy host cried,
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All political thinking for years past has been vitiated in the same way. People can foresee the future only when it coincides with their own wishes, and the most grossly obvious facts can be ignored when they are unwelcome. George Orwell
Posts: 19219 | From: Erehwon | Registered: Aug 2005
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
I feel like I've let down the side!
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
I've emptied the GIN
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Of biscuits, but on the stale side.
While swimming one day in the ocean
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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ArachnidinElmet
Shipmate
# 17346
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Posted
I saw blue whales cause a commotion
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'If a pleasant, straight-forward life is not possible then one must try to wriggle through by subtle manoeuvres' - Kafka
Posts: 1887 | From: the rhubarb triangle | Registered: Sep 2012
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roybart
Shipmate
# 17357
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Posted
The waves that that they made
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"The consolations of the imaginary are not imaginary consolations."
-- Roger Scruton
Posts: 547 | From: here | Registered: Sep 2012
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
So to stay on the beach, that's my notion.
While wandering deep in the forest
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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pimple
Ship's Irruption
# 10635
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Posted
I was knocked in the air - Mini-Morrised!
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In other words, just because I made it all up, doesn't mean it isn't true (Reginald Hill)
Posts: 8018 | From: Wonderland | Registered: Nov 2005
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
But to my surprise
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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no prophet's flag is set so...
Proceed to see sea
# 15560
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Posted
I spied with my eyes
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Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
\_(ツ)_/
Posts: 11498 | From: Treaty 6 territory in the nonexistant Province of Buffalo, Canada ↄ⃝' | Registered: Mar 2010
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
it was an Austin, and the driver a florist!
When cycling on down the main road
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
It croaked out a warning
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
at four in the morning
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
but sadly it croaked it in code.
A lovely young maiden called Sue
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
cooked her stepmother in a fondue.
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
Poor Sue was pelted
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
With toast bits all coated with goo!
There was a young lad from Poughkeepsie*
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* po-KIP-see
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
Whose girlfriend was terribly dipsy
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356
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Posted
All through Dutchess County
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My beard is a testament to my masculinity and virility, and demonstrates that I am a real man. Trouble is, bits of quiche sometimes get caught in it.
Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
she kept scoffing Bounties
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
So much that she almost got tipsy.
There's nothing to watch on TV
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
he said with inordinate glee
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
But if I can find the remote
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
and the bones of a goat
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
| IP: Logged
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
I can summon a ghost in my teepee
When walking the streets of old Durham
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I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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no prophet's flag is set so...
Proceed to see sea
# 15560
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Posted
My thoughts weren't entirely pure, um
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Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
\_(ツ)_/
Posts: 11498 | From: Treaty 6 territory in the nonexistant Province of Buffalo, Canada ↄ⃝' | Registered: Mar 2010
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
I puffed up to the castle
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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ArachnidinElmet
Shipmate
# 17346
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Posted
With a red sequinned tassel
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'If a pleasant, straight-forward life is not possible then one must try to wriggle through by subtle manoeuvres' - Kafka
Posts: 1887 | From: the rhubarb triangle | Registered: Sep 2012
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Stetson
Shipmate
# 9597
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Posted
to scope out young maidens and lure 'em.
I'd say that that the typical Shippie
Posts: 6574 | From: back and forth between bible belts | Registered: Jun 2005
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no prophet's flag is set so...
Proceed to see sea
# 15560
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Posted
And under their hat
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Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
\_(ツ)_/
Posts: 11498 | From: Treaty 6 territory in the nonexistant Province of Buffalo, Canada ↄ⃝' | Registered: Mar 2010
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Mamacita
Lakefront liberal
# 3659
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Posted
There's room for some "tat"
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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.
Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002
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pjl
Shipmate
# 16929
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Posted
Cos they still live the life of a hippie.
Whilst driving down a one way street
[edited to fix boldfacing error]
[ 13. June 2014, 00:11: Message edited by: Amanda B. Reckondwythe ]
Posts: 576 | From: england | Registered: Feb 2012
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
I noticed a cow with one teat.
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"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Welease Woderwick
Sister Incubus Nightmare
# 10424
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Posted
Says I to the cow
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I give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.
Fancy a break in South India?
Accessible Homestay Guesthouse in Central Kerala, contact me for details
What part of Matt. 7:1 don't you understand?
Posts: 48139 | From: 1st on the right, straight on 'til morning | Registered: Sep 2005
| IP: Logged
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Lucia
Looking for light
# 15201
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Posted
Please tell me how
Posts: 1075 | From: Nigh golden stone and spires | Registered: Oct 2009
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Did you and your giant bull meet?
One summery day in Fitzrovia
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I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
a guitar, being plucked by Segovia
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I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander.
alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
| IP: Logged
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
All of a sudden a string
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Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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