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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Taking it Literally
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
We lifted a huge bolt out of the ground, revealing a hole just big enough for us to get through. We jumped into the hole, disappointed that we would not have time to stay and play with the model railway. We found ourselves going down a long slide and the next thing we knew we were in a room, where Q was showing James Bond some gadgets. They both turned to look at us. "Well, now they know about the secret mission, they'll have to join you on your assignment, 007", said Q. James Bond did not seem very enthusiastic about this, but led the way towards a lift. Q said that transport to the airport would be waiting when we got out of the lift. From the airport we would fly with James Bond to some exotic location. "Don't mention this to M, will you?", said Q to James Bond as we got into the lift, "She'll have our guts for garters".
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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jacobsen
seeker
# 14998
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Posted
"Well, at least we missed the thunder," replied Bond, hastily feeling his abdomen to check the gut quotient thereof."But this floor is sheer glass to walk on." "Banana skin territory, " commented Q.
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But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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Banner Lady
Ship's Ensign
# 10505
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Posted
"Back off!" said B1. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" asked B2. "I think I am, B1" replied the second banana, fetching a firehose. "It's cream tea time!" they chorused.
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Women in the church are not a problem to be solved, but a mystery to be enjoyed.
Posts: 7080 | From: Canberra Australia | Registered: Oct 2005
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
Eventually the bananas stopped chasing us and turned into the city opera house.
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Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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jacobsen
seeker
# 14998
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Posted
The opera house was amazing. There were arches, painted black on the inside, with a large red lamp hanging from the roof of each. "My goodness," said Glinda, "they're fluorescent tomatoes!"
"No, no, " barked Toto. "Just stationary fireballs. If you can handle that."
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But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.
Posts: 8040 | From: Æbleskiver country | Registered: Aug 2009
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
We all stood next to the burned down opera house. "They ruined my big night!", said Josie Carreras the opera singer. "We came here for a night of drama and this is what happens!", said an angry ticket holder who obviously had no sense of irony. "You just couldn't leave my balls alone, could you?!" the theatre manager said to us angrily, "I'll b****y give you all Puccini!".
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Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468
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Posted
Puccini, a little blood seeping from a paper cut, crawled out from a secret basement door of the opera house. Everyone stared at him.
He stood up, muttering in Italian, dusted off his clothes, and took a gallant bow. "Yes, I'm dead--get over it!"
More staring. Puccini got a wicked gleam in his eye.
"So...two kids dare each other to go into a graveyard on All Soul's night. They see a strange light, seeping out around a monument. They scramble over to it, and accidentally trip down the stairs revealed by a moved monument.
"When they landed, they saw, by candle light, a man with wavy hair and old clothing, sitting in a corner. He had two stacks of paper. He would take a sheet from one stack, erase everything on it, and put it in the other stack.
"Suddenly noticing them, the man smiled. 'Hello! I'm Beethoven, and I'm...decomposing.'"
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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")
Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
"Probably just as well", said the theatre manager, "we were going to put on Fidelio". He turned to us. "You needn't think you lot are off the hook though".
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plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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