Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Jobs which are not what they seem.
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
The beep monitor who edits TV stars' blue language, to make it suitable for family viewing.
Soldier
-------------------- Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Oops, cross-post. Mine was in reply to celebrant as you probably guessed.
-------------------- Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Piglet
Islander
# 11803
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Posted
Soldier A Cockney auctioneer
Lay clerk
-------------------- I may not be on an island any more, but I'm still an islander. alto n a soprano who can read music
Posts: 20272 | From: Fredericton, NB, on a rather larger piece of rock | Registered: Sep 2006
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Lay clerk - person who arranges the sunbeds before the Germans get their towels down.
Product Information Controller (I nicked this one off the work intranet)
-------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
The Fat Controller's Boss. Carries out the Very Important Work of persuading young children or, more accurately, their parents, of buying as much Thomas The Tank Engine merchandise as will physically fit into their house, by constant advertising of said products to the mini manipulators.
Phlebotomist
-------------------- Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Leorning Cniht
Shipmate
# 17564
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Posted
A veterinary specialist, who removes parasitic insects from the hind parts of dogs.
Staffing Coordinator
Posts: 5026 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2013
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Staffing Coordinator: One who controls the frequency at which certain bacterial infections occur.
Dishwasher
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Dishwasher
A technician who ensures your satellite television reception is clear.
Butler
-------------------- "...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe." ~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Firenze
Ordinary decent pagan
# 619
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Posted
Butler
Not a profession as such, but the person in every meeting ever who says "That sounds like a good idea, however...."
Thatcher
Posts: 17302 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Jun 2001
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jrw
Shipmate
# 18045
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Posted
Thatcher
One who murders union leaders in order to use their hair to thatch rooftops.
Film Director
-------------------- plug plug
Posts: 522 | Registered: Mar 2014
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
Film Director
Person overseeing dishwashers at a low-class restaurant, telling them which dishes to not rinse completely.
Mediator
-------------------- This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Mediator
One who serves as a guide at a television studio.
Veterinarian
-------------------- "...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe." ~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549
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Posted
A heretic of long standing.
Milkman
-------------------- we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams
Posts: 10567 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Sperm Donor.
Piper (got missed out on last page)
-------------------- Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549
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Posted
Tony Benn impersonator
Apple picker
-------------------- we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams
Posts: 10567 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
Apple picker Someone who will only choose a certain brand of pc.
Nursemaid [ 13. February 2016, 15:27: Message edited by: Raptor Eye ]
-------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Nursemaid - an electronic device (popular in the 70sand 80s) that dispersed chicken soup and paracetamol whenever you were ill.
Barista
-------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Barista: An attorney who litigates matters concerning coffee.
Meat Inspector
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Kitten
Shipmate
# 1179
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Posted
Meat Inspector
Someone who ensures that male porn star wannabes have the necessary equipment
Chandler
-------------------- Maius intra qua extra
Never accept a ride from a stranger, unless they are in a big blue box
Posts: 2330 | From: Carmarthenshire | Registered: Aug 2001
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Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649
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Posted
Chandler Someone who takes care of the third letter of the alphabet.
Mathematician [ 14. February 2016, 15:37: Message edited by: Raptor Eye ]
-------------------- Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10
Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
Mathematician
Somebody who thinks up themes for mothers.
Pharmacist
-------------------- Blog Music for your enjoyment Lord may all my hard times be healing times take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Those who farm the upper reaches of Dartmoor where sensitive archaelogical remains mustn't be disturbed.
Verger
-------------------- Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Verger: An expert on Latin poetry.
Janitor
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
Janitor - travel agent specializing in mid-winter holidays in Glastonbury
general contractor
-------------------- This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
general contractor - someone who gets ill for a living
Journals editor
-------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Doone
Shipmate
# 18470
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Posted
Journals editor [/QB][/QUOTE] blackmailer of secrets
Undertaker
Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015
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Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061
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Posted
The person whose duty it is to begin the task.
Supernumerary
-------------------- Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page
Posts: 6378 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Maths Professor
Bellboy
-------------------- Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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Leorning Cniht
Shipmate
# 17564
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Posted
The role usually played by Norman Clegg in Last of the Summer Wine.
Director of First Impressions
Posts: 5026 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2013
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mousethief
Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953
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Posted
Person in charge of initial tombstone rubbings.
Usability Tester
-------------------- This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...
Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Usability Tester: A person whom employment agencies send to prospective employers to see if they are doing any hiring at the moment.
Paralegal [ 17. February 2016, 13:51: Message edited by: Amanda B. Reckondwythe ]
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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Schroedinger's cat
Ship's cool cat
# 64
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Posted
Have you had an accident while parachuting? Might you be entitled to compensation?
Contact the paralegal team.
Technical support technician
-------------------- Blog Music for your enjoyment Lord may all my hard times be healing times take out this broken heart and renew my mind.
Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
Person who puts a screw in someone's walking aid to stop it from collapsing.
Percussionist. [ 17. February 2016, 16:53: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Doone
Shipmate
# 18470
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Posted
Percussionist
Someone who swears very very loudly.
homeopathist
Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015
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Leorning Cniht
Shipmate
# 17564
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Posted
An itinerant who calls door-to-door offering to lay new tarmac on your path.
Astrologer
Posts: 5026 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2013
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Astrologer
Someone who cuts down trees and carries them home in his Chevy van.
Trombone player
-------------------- "...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe." ~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Trombone player - someone who never quite understood how to use a slide rule properly, but found it fun anyway.
Theologian
-------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128
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Posted
Someone who designs and prints company logos on T-shirts and the like.
Permanent Way Inspector.
Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009
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Sioni Sais
Shipmate
# 5713
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Posted
quote: Originally posted by Baptist Trainfan: Someone who designs and prints company logos on T-shirts and the like.
Permanent Way Inspector.
One of a trio along with the Permanent Truth Inspector and the Permanent Light Inspector. With employment reform that "Permanent" tag may not be for long.
Loss adjuster
-------------------- "He isn't Doctor Who, he's The Doctor"
(Paul Sinha, BBC)
Posts: 24276 | From: Newport, Wales | Registered: Apr 2004
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Loss adjuster
Someone who works at a diet clinic (and fudges the books)
Librarian
-------------------- "...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe." ~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870
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Posted
Librarian - dastardly political revolutionary who thinks that useful information should be well ordered (antonym: civil servant)
Corporate Responsibility Manager
-------------------- I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it. Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile
Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012
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Chorister
Completely Frocked
# 473
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Posted
Leader of the Home Guard
Radiographer
-------------------- Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.
Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001
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rolyn
Shipmate
# 16840
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Posted
Someone who makes graphs to show sales of transistor radios
Stonemason
-------------------- Change is the only certainty of existence
Posts: 3206 | From: U.K. | Registered: Dec 2011
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Pigwidgeon
Ship's Owl
# 10192
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Posted
Stonemason
Someone who makes sculptures of Mick Jagger.
Disc jockey
-------------------- "...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe." ~Tortuf
Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005
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Pasco
Shipmate
# 388
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Posted
Disc Jockey: A pizza deliveryman on horseback.
Politician
Posts: 997 | From: Domiciling 'ere, living locally. | Registered: Jun 2001
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Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549
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Posted
Politician Expert on good manners
Agony Aunt
-------------------- we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams
Posts: 10567 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004
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The Rogue
Shipmate
# 2275
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Posted
Agony Aunt - a torturer who likes to keep it in the family.
Accountant
-------------------- If everyone starts thinking outside the box does outside the box come back inside?
Posts: 2507 | From: Toton | Registered: Feb 2002
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Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061
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Posted
An ant in the peerage.
Tatter
-------------------- Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page
Posts: 6378 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014
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Amanda B. Reckondwythe
Dressed for Church
# 5521
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Posted
Tatter: The sacristan of an Anglo-Catholic church.
Prothonotary
-------------------- "I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.
Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004
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