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» Ship of Fools   »   » Oblivion   » Jobs which are not what they seem. (Page 3)

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Source: (consider it) Thread: Jobs which are not what they seem.
Doone
Shipmate
# 18470

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Prothonotary [/QB][/QUOTE]

The person in charge of promoting thongs over big knickers

philologist

Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015  |  IP: Logged
Schroedinger's cat

Ship's cool cat
# 64

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philologist
Someone who studies the history of people called Philip.

Gaffer

--------------------
Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.

Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Raptor Eye
Shipmate
# 16649

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Gaffer
Someone who breaks wind for a living.

Pianist

--------------------
Be still, and know that I am God! Psalm 46.10

Posts: 4359 | From: The United Kingdom | Registered: Sep 2011  |  IP: Logged
Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870

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Pianist - Someone who thinks the national anthem ought to be I Am The Music Man

Executive sanitation engineer

--------------------
I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile

Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged
Doone
Shipmate
# 18470

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executive sanitary engineer

The person in charge of keeping cleaners sane

astronaut

Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015  |  IP: Logged
Kitten
Shipmate
# 1179

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astronaut

The person you go to if you have run out of AstroTurf

stevedore

--------------------
Maius intra qua extra

Never accept a ride from a stranger, unless they are in a big blue box

Posts: 2330 | From: Carmarthenshire | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged
Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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stevedore: Architect to the Steves.

Ombudsman

--------------------
"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.

Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549

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Ombudsman Ashram Gardener

Tennis Umpire

--------------------
we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams

Posts: 10567 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Doone
Shipmate
# 18470

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tennis umpire

Someone who likes scoring points over someone else

hedge layer

Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015  |  IP: Logged
Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870

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Hedge layer - someone who doesn't mind a few prickles in their back

First Lord of the Treasury

--------------------
I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile

Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged
Doone
Shipmate
# 18470

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First Lord of the Treasury

Someone who has Messianic delusions of Grandeur

Flautist

Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015  |  IP: Logged
Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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Flautist: what they call proctologists behind their back (so to speak).

Cheerleader

--------------------
"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.

Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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Cheerleader

The person in charge of laundry detergent

Circus acrobat

--------------------
"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Doone
Shipmate
# 18470

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circus acrobat

A person with the athleticism needed to direct traffic in Piccadily Circus.

tailor

Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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tailor

The person responsible for attaching rear appendages on dogs and cats.

Which brings us to...

Dog groomer

--------------------
"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Chorister

Completely Frocked
# 473

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Employee at Wippells.

taxi driver

--------------------
Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.

Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549

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taxi driver Receptionist; person who checks whom you're talking to.

Telephone sanitation engineer

[ 29. February 2016, 16:17: Message edited by: Dafyd ]

--------------------
we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams

Posts: 10567 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870

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Telephone sanitation engineer - someone who ensures that conversations continue to make sense, even after the first "bye" has been said.

Director of Better

--------------------
I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile

Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged
Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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Director of Better: Person who ensures that adjectives are given nouns to modify.

Wet nurse

--------------------
"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.

Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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Wet nurse

A hospital employee who just gave a very messy bed bath.

Verger

--------------------
"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Leorning Cniht
Shipmate
# 17564

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Verger

Highways Authority employee who drives a mowing machine.

Bedder

Posts: 5026 | From: USA | Registered: Feb 2013  |  IP: Logged
Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870

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Bedder - Person who ensures that adjectives are given nouns to modify, when they have a cold.

Lab technician

--------------------
I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile

Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged
Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061

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A jumped-up title for the person who grooms labrador retrievers.

Typesetter

--------------------
Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

Posts: 6378 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged
Pulsator Organorum Ineptus
Shipmate
# 2515

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Typesetter

Someone who looks after typewriters whose parents are out having a good time with their friends and arrive home drunk.

Quantity Surveyor

Posts: 695 | From: Bronteland | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged
Kitten
Shipmate
# 1179

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Quantity Surveyor

Someone that measures Mary Quant for bras

Stenographer

--------------------
Maius intra qua extra

Never accept a ride from a stranger, unless they are in a big blue box

Posts: 2330 | From: Carmarthenshire | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged
Doone
Shipmate
# 18470

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stenographer

The person writing the life story of St. Brian Eno

anthropologist

Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015  |  IP: Logged
rolyn
Shipmate
# 16840

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Anthropologist A person who apologises for the upset caused by insects

Blacksmith

--------------------
Change is the only certainty of existence

Posts: 3206 | From: U.K. | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged
Schroedinger's cat

Ship's cool cat
# 64

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Blacksmith

Zoe Saldanas make up artist.

Forensic Archaeologist

--------------------
Blog
Music for your enjoyment
Lord may all my hard times be healing times
take out this broken heart and renew my mind.

Posts: 18859 | From: At the bottom of a deep dark well. | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Chorister

Completely Frocked
# 473

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Ancient Historian who studies medical practice in faraway countries.


Policeman

--------------------
Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.

Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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Policeman: Person in charge of props on the set of Keeping Up Appearances.

Haberdasher

--------------------
"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.

Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Sipech
Shipmate
# 16870

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Haberdasher - someone who runs away from chemical warfare

Chief Whip

--------------------
I try to be self-deprecating; I'm just not very good at it.
Twitter: http://twitter.com/TheAlethiophile

Posts: 3791 | From: On the corporate ladder | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged
Brenda Clough
Shipmate
# 18061

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The dominatrix in charge.

Caramelizer

--------------------
Science fiction and fantasy writer with a Patreon page

Posts: 6378 | From: Washington DC | Registered: Mar 2014  |  IP: Logged
Pasco
Shipmate
# 388

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Caramelizer: Operator at an avant-garde sunbed tanning studio.

Casting Director

Posts: 997 | From: Domiciling 'ere, living locally. | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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Casting Director
The person in charge of fly fishing.

Blacksmith

--------------------
"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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Blacksmith: A member of the African branch of the Smith family.

Beadle

--------------------
"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.

Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356

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Liverpudlian pop star with a heavy cold.

Intern

Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged
Dafyd
Shipmate
# 5549

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Intern Seabird enthusiast.

Human Resources Manager

--------------------
we remain, thanks to original sin, much in love with talking about, rather than with, one another. Rowan Williams

Posts: 10567 | From: Edinburgh | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Pasco
Shipmate
# 388

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Human Resources Manager: Person associated with procurements for Papua New Guinea ceremony.

Stage Manager

Posts: 997 | From: Domiciling 'ere, living locally. | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
Baptist Trainfan
Shipmate
# 15128

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The person (before the age of the railways) who used to organise the mail coaches at inns so that the horses were changed, the passengers fed, and they all got away on time. (Also found in the Wild West).

Astronomer Royal.

Posts: 9750 | From: The other side of the Severn | Registered: Sep 2009  |  IP: Logged
Doone
Shipmate
# 18470

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Astronomer Royal

A titled person whose head is in the clouds.

High Court Judge

Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015  |  IP: Logged
Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356

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Tennis umpire

Deemster

Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged
Doone
Shipmate
# 18470

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Deemster

The person who judges the Manx cat competition.

Thatcher

Posts: 2208 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2015  |  IP: Logged
Albertus
Shipmate
# 13356

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Someone who used to go round with That Sonny

Arborist

Posts: 6498 | From: Y Sowth | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged
Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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Arborist: Someone who tells tiresome stories.

Nurse

--------------------
"I take prayer too seriously to use it as an excuse for avoiding work and responsibility." -- The Revd Martin Luther King Jr.

Posts: 10542 | From: The Great Southwest | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Pasco
Shipmate
# 388

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Nurse: Nordic horse-drawn hearse provider.

Acupuncturist

Posts: 997 | From: Domiciling 'ere, living locally. | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
no prophet's flag is set so...

Proceed to see sea
# 15560

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Acupuncturist - someone who ensures accuracy of punctuation.

Cardinal

--------------------
Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety.
\_(ツ)_/

Posts: 11498 | From: Treaty 6 territory in the nonexistant Province of Buffalo, Canada ↄ⃝' | Registered: Mar 2010  |  IP: Logged



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