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Source: (consider it) Thread: Welcoming with name tags
venbede
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# 16669

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In MW 3023 Trinity on the Hill I was struck by the following comment as though what was described was totally to be expected:

"A greeter welcomed us and issued name tags".

I can’t imagine this in the UK, even in the sort of praise band evangelical sort of place (of which I have no first hand experience).

I’m sure it’s well meant, but my gut reaction is to be aghast. Far from welcoming I’d find it very intrusive.

Is it common in the US?

Any comments?

--------------------
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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Sipech
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# 16870

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I hate being marked out as a newcomer/visitor. It's nigh on guaranteed way to make sure I never return.

That said, I would quite enjoy a bit of mischievousness if there were enough room to write Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

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Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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Yeah, it's very American. The reverse of the medal, which we have also done, is for all the members to wear name tags, which then marks the newbies out just as well. This does mean that all regular members have to have and wear their name tags, and a lot of whining from the pulpit has never gotten 100% compliance.

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Nick Tamen

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# 15164

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quote:
Originally posted by venbede:
Is it common in the US?

Any comments?

Yes, it is common—very common in some regions or in churches likely to get a regular number of visitors, perhaps not as common in others.

Bear in mind, though, that the churches that make name tags for visitors will also, in my experience, have permanent name tags for members. These are usually placed on some kind of board near the entrance to the narthex, so that members can pick them up as they come in and put them back as they leave. So, the name tags made for visitors are designed to keep them from being the only (non-robed) people not wearing name tags.

I'm not really a fan of the practice, though I understand the good intentions behind it. When I'm a visitor, I like to fade into the woodwork. And name tags remind me too much of a business convention. My own congregation started using name tags a few years ago. I was one of those who cautioned that not everyone finds use of name tags welcoming, but when the decision was made to use them, I decided to be a team player rather than to refuse to wear one. I've gradually gotten more used to them, though as time passes people start forgetting to wear them.

That said, I have had the experience of taking communion somewhere other than my own church, and of being surprised—in a good way—when those administering communion called me by name. It took me little a while to remember that, duh, I had a name tag on.

Edit: x-posted with Brenda.

[ 06. June 2016, 13:42: Message edited by: Nick Tamen ]

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The first thing God says to Moses is, "Take off your shoes." We are on holy ground. Hard to believe, but the truest thing I know. — Anne Lamott

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Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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It's also an expense and a bother -- someone has to make all those name tags, proofread them (names -must- be spelled right) and keep them in alphabetical order so that people can find them in the scrum just before the service. Irritating decisions have to be made about children, occasional visitors like college kids home for the summer, etc. People always lose them, don't put them back, leave them on their shirts and then run the garment through the wash, so you're always having to make more. And unless you carefully keep them all the same, the older ones are visibly different from the newer ones, obviating the point of being able to spot new arrivals with one glance.

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Nick Tamen

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# 15164

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
It's also an expense and a bother -- someone has to make all those name tags, proofread them (names -must- be spelled right) and keep them in alphabetical order so that people can find them in the scrum just before the service.

We don't put them in alphabetical order. We have two different doors to the narthex (which is also the way the people would come in earlier for Sunday school) that can be used depending on which street one is coming from (we're on a corner). So we put one rack for them near each door and just told everyone to use the rack nearest the door they usually use and to pick a place that works for them for their name tags.

Anyone who could be considered a regular or semi-regular visitor is offered a permanent name tag. All family members of a member, including college kids, have them too.

I could add that our permanent ones are printed on heavy stock with a plastic cover. The church logo is also on the tag. The ones for visitors, on the other hand, are simply stick-on tags with names hand-written.

I've actually been surprised that our somewhat laid-back system for them works pretty well.

[ 06. June 2016, 14:36: Message edited by: Nick Tamen ]

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The first thing God says to Moses is, "Take off your shoes." We are on holy ground. Hard to believe, but the truest thing I know. — Anne Lamott

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Amanda B. Reckondwythe

Dressed for Church
# 5521

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It's relatively common here, as others have noted. Personally I hate the practice -- I think it borders on a sin of pride. I much prefer Emily Dickinson's approach.

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The Phantom Flan Flinger
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Why would name tags be needed?
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Salicional
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# 16461

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The idea is that it makes it easier for newcomers/occasional visitors to learn people's names, particularly in a large congregation.
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Nick Tamen

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# 15164

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quote:
Originally posted by Salicional:
The idea is that it makes it easier for newcomers/occasional visitors to learn people's names, particularly in a large congregation.

Or for members to learn the names of newcomers. I'll admit, the older I get, the more help I need with that. [Hot and Hormonal]

It seems to be popular, too, in areas with more transient populations. I could have added above that we have a university nearby and we host the Presbyterian campus group. So, during the academic year we regularly see a fair number of college students whose faces may be familiar, but whose names may not be.

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The first thing God says to Moses is, "Take off your shoes." We are on holy ground. Hard to believe, but the truest thing I know. — Anne Lamott

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Alan Cresswell

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# 31

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I am absolutely useless at remembering names. So, although I think they're a generally daft thing more reminiscent of a conference than a church, I would value something to remind me of the name of the person I'm talking to.

Of course, that's name tags for regulars. For a visitor or newcomer there isn't the same need. You're new to all the regulars, and they will learn your name very quickly, you don't need to wear a name tag. But, you'll be lucky to remember any of the names of people you were introduced to in that information overload of being welcomed by everyone over coffee.

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Og, King of Bashan

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# 9562

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We have a box of stickers and markers. No one forces anyone to make a name tag, but it is encouraged, and I generally do it. I'm bad with names, so I always appreciate settings where name tags are used.

If you get enough people participating, it becomes somewhat egalitarian. I participate in an annual show in another setting, with some cast members having fifty shows under their belts, and usually about ten rookies every year. And everyone wears a name tag at every rehearsal, no questions, no exceptions, and no complaints. There is something about the fifty-year vet putting on his name tag that strikes the opposite of the "don't you know who I am" chord that can sometimes underscore the rest of the show.

(This coming from someone who will defiantly sit on his hands any time he is visiting a church and visitors are asked to identify themselves during the announcements.)

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Leorning Cniht
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# 17564

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quote:
Originally posted by Sipech:

That said, I would quite enjoy a bit of mischievousness if there were enough room to write Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

I once wrote "Inigo Montoya" on one of those paper "Hello my name is" stickers at some preschool function or similar. After the third parent said something along the lines of "Is that Spanish? You don't sound Spanish." and nobody showed any signs of recognition, I gave it up for a bad lot and removed the nametag.
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venbede
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# 16669

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quote:
Originally posted by Nick Tamen:
And name tags remind me too much of a business convention.

That was what I immediately thought. It also assumes everyone is an English speaker.

I have no difficulty standing up and introducing myself. That is asking me to define myself. Putting a badge on me is allowing myself to be defined.

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Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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Pigwidgeon

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# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by venbede:
I have no difficulty standing up and introducing myself. That is asking me to define myself. Putting a badge on me is allowing myself to be defined.

Many years ago (shortly after the Earth had cooled) I went to a diocesan youth conference. We were all asked ahead of time to make our own name tags, decorated however we wished. That gave each of us the opportunity to "define" ourselves. They were also great conversation starters. (This idea would probably not work in a church setting, but it worked very well there.)

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Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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If you really want a conversation starter, create a whole bunch of quite different name tags. The 'Hello My Name is' stickers are best for this. All the names should be of well-known people or characters -- Princess Margaret, Jabba the Hutt, Iron Man, Dwight D. Eisenhower, Pope John Paul II. Stick one onto the BACK of every attendee. They can find out who they are, only by asking other people.

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Lamb Chopped
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# 5528

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I'm mostly faceblind (about 80%) and I'm incredibly grateful for those tags when anyone uses them, as it prevents me making ghastly errors. But my kind are probably fairly rare, and if it bothers the whole church, I'd probably better just suck it up and deal.

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Og, King of Bashan

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# 9562

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quote:
Originally posted by venbede:
I have no difficulty standing up and introducing myself. That is asking me to define myself. Putting a badge on me is allowing myself to be defined.

Don't you start an introduction by saying something along the lines of "Hi! My name is venbede!"? I don't see the difference here.

(Maybe the way the MW report says they were "issued" name tags suggests that it was involuntary. I suspect that only a truly clueless usher would insist on you wearing a name tag if you just said "no thanks!". Granted, there are a lot of clueless extroverts out there...)

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"I like to eat crawfish and drink beer. That's despair?" ― Walker Percy

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Pigwidgeon

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# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
If you really want a conversation starter, create a whole bunch of quite different name tags. The 'Hello My Name is' stickers are best for this. All the names should be of well-known people or characters -- Princess Margaret, Jabba the Hutt, Iron Man, Dwight D. Eisenhower, Pope John Paul II. Stick one onto the BACK of every attendee. They can find out who they are, only by asking other people.

It would certainly make the Exchange of the Peace interesting.
[Big Grin]

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

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venbede
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# 16669

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quote:
Originally posted by Og, King of Bashan:
Don't you start an introduction by saying something along the lines of "Hi! My name is venbede!"? I don't see the difference here.

I do indeed. If I have a name badge on, that opening gambit becomes just silly. So what do I say?

--------------------
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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leo
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# 1458

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I really hate the idea of name badges.

One of my chrches has pigeon holes for 'members' - but we are there for non members.

As an introvert, my blue scarf helps me to approach strangers but I would hope tha most people can be friendly without indentifying marks.

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Doublethink.
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# 1984

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quote:
Originally posted by venbede:
quote:
Originally posted by Og, King of Bashan:
Don't you start an introduction by saying something along the lines of "Hi! My name is venbede!"? I don't see the difference here.

I do indeed. If I have a name badge on, that opening gambit becomes just silly. So what do I say?
"Hello" ?

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All political thinking for years past has been vitiated in the same way. People can foresee the future only when it coincides with their own wishes, and the most grossly obvious facts can be ignored when they are unwelcome. George Orwell

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ThunderBunk

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# 15579

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Like Leo, I instinctively really hate this idea.

However, it does remind me of the dilemma that eventually drove some American friends back over the pond.

It is considered good manners in this country not ever to allude to anyone's ignorance of a situation. Therefore we assume that everyone knows everything, the effect of which is that no-one will ever tell anyone anything openly, and it is impossible for outsiders to find anything out without applying the thumbscrews.

Perhaps we should start by offering our names "for free", and then be willing and able to fill in other blanks as they arise. Perhaps, however, this can be done without the use of labels.

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North East Quine

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# 13049

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Many years ago we visited a church in New York. When we went in, stickers which said "I'm (blank) and I'm a visitor!" were filled in with our names.

Lots of people said hello. We enjoyed it as a new experience, but we haven't been tempted to suggest it for our own church.

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Albertus
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# 13356

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quote:
Originally posted by leo:
I really hate the idea of name badges.

One of my chrches has pigeon holes for 'members' - but we are there for non members.

As an introvert, my blue scarf helps me to approach strangers but I would hope tha most people can be friendly without indentifying marks.

And of course 'members' isn't a category that the CofE recognises, anyway.
One would hope that people can be friendly without identifying marks. However, I've found that I'm much less shy about approaching unfamiliar faces- in fact not shy at all- since I becae a churchwarden. Having a role gives me a part to play and that's good.

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Karl: Liberal Backslider
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# 76

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
If you really want a conversation starter, create a whole bunch of quite different name tags. The 'Hello My Name is' stickers are best for this. All the names should be of well-known people or characters -- Princess Margaret, Jabba the Hutt, Iron Man, Dwight D. Eisenhower, Pope John Paul II. Stick one onto the BACK of every attendee. They can find out who they are, only by asking other people.

If you really want to guarantee that I will never, ever, darken your door again, do this. Or what's described in the OP. Or ask me to introduce myself. You'll get to know me, in good time, if I choose to hang around. Oh yes.

[ 06. June 2016, 21:41: Message edited by: Karl: Liberal Backslider ]

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St Deird
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# 7631

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I wear my nametag every week. I'm hoping that, one day, some of the people I chat to every week will wear their nametags, so I can finally find out what their names are...

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Lothlorien
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# 4927

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I loathe such things and was very glad when at one church, mine just disappeared. Somehow, I never got around to asking for a replacement.

I have made myself use a tag at a residential, week long conference where I was part of the team. One year we used the portable gadgets for making button style badges. These were decorated by each person as they saw fit. How does one portray being an introvert? I usually took the easy way out and did a quick butterfly or flower.

As for sticky labels, they are the work of the devil. They leave a residue of adhesive for seemingly forever on clothing. A solvent just does more damage often. An added evil to the actual practice of name tags..

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St Deird
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# 7631

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quote:
Originally posted by Lothlorien:
As for sticky labels, they are the work of the devil. They leave a residue of adhesive for seemingly forever on clothing. A solvent just does more damage often. An added evil to the actual practice of name tags..

Agreed. My current church has the only style that's ever been nice to my clothing: a magnetic nametag.

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They're not hobbies; they're a robust post-apocalyptic skill-set.

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venbede
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# 16669

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quote:
Originally posted by Lothlorien:
I loathe such things and was very glad when at one church, mine just disappeared.

Are you in the US, Loth? I got the impression you were in the UK. If so, what sort of UK churches have such tags?

--------------------
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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Lothlorien
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# 4927

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I am in Sydney, Australia, girt by sea and too much girt in the last few days of damage.

The last name tag which I lost had a safetry pin o. The back. It did not fall off, I lost it somewhere.

I would refuse to accept a sticky label.

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Buy a bale. Help our Aussie rural communities and farmers. Another great cause needing support The High Country Patrol.

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venbede
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# 16669

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I still can't imagine it in the UK.

Thanks

--------------------
Man was made for joy and woe;
And when this we rightly know,
Thro' the world we safely go.

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betjemaniac
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quote:
Originally posted by Karl: Liberal Backslider:
quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
If you really want a conversation starter, create a whole bunch of quite different name tags. The 'Hello My Name is' stickers are best for this. All the names should be of well-known people or characters -- Princess Margaret, Jabba the Hutt, Iron Man, Dwight D. Eisenhower, Pope John Paul II. Stick one onto the BACK of every attendee. They can find out who they are, only by asking other people.

If you really want to guarantee that I will never, ever, darken your door again, do this. Or what's described in the OP. Or ask me to introduce myself. You'll get to know me, in good time, if I choose to hang around. Oh yes.
[Overused]

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Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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We all are, clearly, speaking from the viewpoint of the longtime churchgoers. I wonder how newcomers feel about name tags? I am certain someone's done a study of it somewhere.

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Hilda of Whitby
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# 7341

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Making newcomers and guests (who might never return) fill out a name tag? I would head for the exit, personally. It's a bit like the practice at some churches to ask newcomers and guests to stand up. That makes me want to dive under a pew. I know these things are well-meant, but for someone like me (an introvert) it can feel intrusive.

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SvitlanaV2
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# 16967

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quote:
Originally posted by venbede:
I still can't imagine it in the UK.

Neither can I.

Mind you, it's not just about personality, but also church context. Most mainstream British congregations are small, and visitor numbers are also likely to be small. It's not that hard to remember the names of one or two visitors, if that's thought to be important, so a name badge would be unnecessary.

Secondly, IME the CofE congregation can be a space where it's okay to want to be alone. The name badge idea assumes that everyone wants to be friends, but a MOTR CofE congregation doesn't assume that at all.

[ 07. June 2016, 13:39: Message edited by: SvitlanaV2 ]

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Pigwidgeon

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# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
We all are, clearly, speaking from the viewpoint of the longtime churchgoers. I wonder how newcomers feel about name tags? I am certain someone's done a study of it somewhere.

Newcomers may well feel uncomfortable being expected to wear a name tag (I would), but doesn't it make it easier for them if the longtime churchgoers wear them? It's difficult when one is new to a congregation learning everyone's names and positions.

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Brenda Clough
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# 18061

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I will say that when we went to St. John's in Hampstead it was August, and there were but fifteen congregants in the pews. (Both the choir and the rector were away, and it was a scratch worship team.) And I dare swear I do not look like anyone in Hampstead. So we were easily distinguished and quickly greeted.

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venbede
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OK, let’s just say it’s a pond thing.

But it is also a matter of the size of the congregation: about 100 at Holy Trinity in the OP. With a evangelical mega church or a busy RC city weekend mass with hundreds or thousands it wouldn’t be practical. (And Brenda has described in weary tones and vivid terms the logistical impracticality in an average congregation.)

I also wonder if it is a MOTR thing – not in C of E terms but ecumenically. Nice Presbyterians (and you don’t get any nicer than Nick Tamen *), TECers. Methodists et al. I can’t imagine it at an RC mass or Orthodox Divine Liturgy (not least it assumes that everyone will be present and in their places at the start, fat chance). Can someone with more experience of Pentecostal services or revival rallies or the like say if it would work in that context?

* Not the least examples of his niceness was his first post here.

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Sipech
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# 16870

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
I dare swear I do not look like anyone in Hampstead.

[tangent] I was bobbling around that area on Saturday. Saw quite a variety of people (including Tamsin Greig), but am intrigued by what you mean. Were you in double denim? [/tangent]

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Baptist Trainfan
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# 15128

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
I will say that when we went to St. John's in Hampstead ...

Was that St. John's the Parish Church, or the rather lovely St. John's Downshire Hill?
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Baptist Trainfan
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# 15128

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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
I dare swear I do not look like anyone in Hampstead.

Is this what they (and their dogs) look like - or, at least, looked like in about 1960? (Start at 1min14sec into the video). Mind you, that is more Parliament Hill than Hampstead itself!

[ 07. June 2016, 14:51: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]

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Brenda Clough
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Gosh, there are two? This is the St. Johns Hampstead I was at. It was a couple summers ago. I do not look like a native of anywhere on earth, but it's not a problem. Even in China, I am head and shoulders taller than most of the population, and I walk and talk like an American.

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Baptist Trainfan
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Yes - this is the other one. It's very Evangelical. The churches are only about half-a-mile apart.

You're right about the walking: Polish people walk differently to Brits, for instance, although I couldn't define the differences.

[ 07. June 2016, 16:49: Message edited by: Baptist Trainfan ]

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Brenda Clough
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I think it was Dorothy Sayers who pointed out that it is very nearly impossible to disguise one's back. There are even regional variations -- New Yorkers walk in a distinctive way.

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Augustine the Aleut
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quote:
Originally posted by Brenda Clough:
We all are, clearly, speaking from the viewpoint of the longtime churchgoers. I wonder how newcomers feel about name tags? I am certain someone's done a study of it somewhere.

I daresay that studies exist but I have not seen any. On several occasions (mainly TEC in the southern states but also Anglican, UCC, & RCC in Ontario and BC) I have been given nametags and asked to write my name. I thanked them and declined-- only on two occasions (RCC & ACC, both in BC) was I pressured on this. On one of these occasions, if I had not been driving an older person there and back, the sidespersons were sufficiently determined on this that I would have happily exited and worshipped an espresso nearby.

However, I know several other people who really liked being asked to fill out nametags and felt that it was warm and welcoming, and they told me that it made them feel very positively towards the congregation. Different strokes, I suppose.

If I were a new resident, checking out possibilities, I think it would depend very much on whether or not I felt any pressure, so perhaps the nametaggers' attitude might carry the day for me.

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no prophet's flag is set so...

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Although we may all speak English, are from English speaking countries, it is not reasonable to assume cultural understanding of any particularly locale. I get that on London, Toronto, Vancouver, Texas etc that you expect to disappear into the crowd.

Culture of greeting people not recognized is well established as required in some places. It is obvious who isn't known, and to not draw some attention to visitors is seen as cold, unfriendly and rather un-Christian. You will be called by your first name for certain, and people will try to figure out how they might be connected to you. It's simply the polite thing to do. It's common to be one of 20 or 30 in some of our churches, so you will actually be introduced versus name tags. And in winter, they will boost your car battery and help you get on your way.

Now on the other hand, I think we're being told that the Anglican church will cease to be due to greying and infirm members, and almost no-one under 60, 50 if you're lucky. They are often desperate to "build community" and get some new blood. Is this also part of this name tag discussion.

[ 08. June 2016, 02:58: Message edited by: no prophet's flag is set so... ]

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Leorning Cniht
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# 17564

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quote:
Originally posted by no prophet's flag is set so...:

Culture of greeting people not recognized is well established as required in some places.

I'm usually greeted whenever I go to church whilst travelling. Usually with some variation on "Hello, are you new to the area?", to which I respond that I'm just here for the weekend, and depending on how chatty I'm feeling, further conversation may or may not ensue.

The only times I've been completely anonymous and unspoken-to were at a cathedral (I got a "Hello" and a service sheet, but suspect that strangers were common) and in a university town, where perhaps again strangers are the norm.

I hate nametags, and I hate random strangers walking up to me, peering at my chest, and then addressing me by name.

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Evangeline
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# 7002

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quote:
Originally posted by Lothlorien:
I loathe such things and was very glad when at one church, mine just disappeared. Somehow, I never got around to asking for a replacement.

I have made myself use a tag at a residential, week long conference where I was part of the team. One year we used the portable gadgets for making button style badges. These were decorated by each person as they saw fit. How does one portray being an introvert? I usually took the easy way out and did a quick butterfly or flower.

As for sticky labels, they are the work of the devil. They leave a residue of adhesive for seemingly forever on clothing. A solvent just does more damage often. An added evil to the actual practice of name tags..

I loathe them too [Smile] R u attending a church near you at the moment Loth? I still have extremely rare contact with St Docs for one reason or another.
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BabyWombat
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# 18552

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A parish I served tried name tags for a while -- until someone pointed out that it made it so terribly easy to know who had not come to church, simply by glancing at the tag board during the exchange of the peace. Yes, that could have been the invitation for making a friendly call to check in, but in that place it was more of a prompt to gossip and innuendo.

Another parish nearby had pigeon hole boxes in the narthex for all parishioners, for distribution of reports, newsletters, etc. It made it ever so easy to determine who the regulars were, and who seldom came (or at least who checked their mailbox).

I will admit to loathing name tags. Parishes in this diocese are, for the most part, small. When I am a visitor I find I assess the warmth of the congregation by noting if anyone notices me as a new face and welcomes me, without my standing out in any way. Yes, at times there has been confusion - an old timer, seldom present, welcoming me as a newbie after several months, but the welcome is still warmly meant and warmly taken.

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