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Source: (consider it) Thread: Gadgets for God Suggestions
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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The old Gadgets for God thread seems to have disappeared, but Episcopal Priest Barbie was just too wonderful to let pass.
[Big Grin]

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
ST
Shipmate
# 14600

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Agreed, although it has Barbie has had mentions here and here.

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Formerly nowsouthwest - but moved!

Posts: 114 | From: No longer in the South-west of the UK! | Registered: Feb 2009  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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Oops! I hadn't read those threads.
[Hot and Hormonal]

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
jacobsen

seeker
# 14998

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But here I could get onto the site - the other links didn't work for me. Thanks, PW! [Smile]

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But God, holding a candle, looks for all who wander, all who search. - Shifra Alon
Beauty fades, dumb is forever-Judge Judy
The man who made time, made plenty.

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Doublethink.
Ship's Foolwise Unperson
# 1984

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How's about this ?

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All political thinking for years past has been vitiated in the same way. People can foresee the future only when it coincides with their own wishes, and the most grossly obvious facts can be ignored when they are unwelcome. George Orwell

Posts: 19219 | From: Erehwon | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Organ Builder
Shipmate
# 12478

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I just had this brought to my attention.

Even in death, you can't escape tackiness.

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How desperately difficult it is to be honest with oneself. It is much easier to be honest with other people.--E.F. Benson

Posts: 3337 | From: ...somewhere in between 40 and death... | Registered: Mar 2007  |  IP: Logged
jlg

What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98

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Oh. Dear. Yuck.

I'm sure the laser image tombstone people will quickly seize on this.

Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Boogie

Boogie on down!
# 13538

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How about one of these ?

Patience needed - they are sold out until October.

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Garden. Room. Walk

Posts: 13030 | From: Boogie Wonderland | Registered: Mar 2008  |  IP: Logged
Lyda*Rose

Ship's broken porthole
# 4544

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Classics! But I'm afraid that they have been well known for a couple of years.

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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

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Kelly Alves

Bunny with an axe
# 2522

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Those are kinda grwong on me. They are rather jaunty.

(Cheer, cheer for Old Notre Dame,
Wake up the echoes cheering her name...)

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I cannot expect people to believe “
Jesus loves me, this I know” of they don’t believe “Kelly loves me, this I know.”
Kelly Alves, somewhere around 2003.

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Golden Key
Shipmate
# 1468

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This technically may not qualify, since it's an Instructables project rather than a ready-made product, but:

Telephone To God--Instructables.

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Blessed Gator, pray for us!
--"Oh bat bladders, do you have to bring common sense into this?" (Dragon, "Jane & the Dragon")
--"Oh, Peace Train, save this country!" (Yusuf/Cat Stevens, "Peace Train")

Posts: 18601 | From: Chilling out in an undisclosed, sincere pumpkin patch. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
andythehat

Ship's Flying Monk
# 10399

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Got a tin of these for a recent birthday... The free "toy" is a Jesus pencil-topper...

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Get your warm fuzzy feeling here!

Posts: 302 | From: Cambridge, but now Malmesbury, Wiltshire | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged
Wesley J

Silly Shipmate
# 6075

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quote:
Originally posted by Organ Builder:
I just had this brought to my attention.

Even in death, you can't escape tackiness.

That there's a taliban welcoming good and decent American citizens in the afterlife does come as a bit of a shock.

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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)

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Wesley J

Silly Shipmate
# 6075

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quote:
Originally posted by andythehat:
Got a tin of these for a recent birthday... The free "toy" is a Jesus pencil-topper...

From the same site:

"Jesus and Flamingo Shower/Bath Gel" - an unlikely combination. But wait: there's more! Yes, "Jesus contains 50ml of scented shower/bath gel" (who'd have thunk!), yet, as they claim, is "SOLD OUT". Unsurprisingly though, as with £1.00 it was certainly cheaper than 30 pieces of silver. Nor do you have to kill yourself afterwards. Which is always a good thing, I reckon.

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Be it as it may: Wesley J will stay. --- Euthanasia, that sounds good. An alpine neutral neighbourhood. Then back to Britain, all dressed in wood. Things were gonna get worse. (John Cooper Clarke)

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Nanny Ogg

Ship's cushion
# 1176

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How about this for your table - seasoning for the soul

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Buy me a beer and I'm you friend forever

Posts: 4137 | From: Away with the fairies | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged
Simon

Editor
# 1

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quote:
Originally posted by Organ Builder:
I just had this brought to my attention.

Even in death, you can't escape tackiness.

Thanks, OB. This is one we've already covered, but do post again if you see any other holy deathware... it's one of our favourite Gadget for God categories.

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Eternal memory

Posts: 3787 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
jlg

What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98

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quote:
Originally posted by Nanny Ogg:
How about this for your table - seasoning for the soul

I have to admit I found this rather tempting, but then I came up with a bunch of questions.

I do wonder how well it grinds the peppercorns. Also why they chose to depict the BVM in ebony? And does it dispense both salt and pepper or merely grind whichever (which assumes the salt is in chunky form) you put into it?

Kitsch is one thing, lack of information on a website selling something is another.

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Organ Builder
Shipmate
# 12478

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quote:
Originally posted by Simon:
Thanks, OB. This is one we've already covered, but do post again if you see any other holy deathware... it's one of our favourite Gadget for God categories.

Whoops! I had checked the "Death" category, so I wondered how I missed it. I see it is under "Home and Garden". Somehow, that makes it funnier.

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How desperately difficult it is to be honest with oneself. It is much easier to be honest with other people.--E.F. Benson

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Simon

Editor
# 1

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Yes, it probably should be under "Sale of the Cemetery"... I'll move it when I have a mo.

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Eternal memory

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Flausa

Mad Woman
# 3466

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I soooooo wish that this actually came as a figurine. There's a Precious Moment for the mantle.
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daisymay

St Elmo's Fire
# 1480

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Have you got this one already? Jesus Toasters I've not noticed it before!

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London
Flickr fotos

Posts: 11224 | From: London - originally Dundee, Blairgowrie etc... | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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In my local bookstore today, I came across What Would Jesus Wear? and was delighted to come home and see that it's available from amazon.com so that all of you can buy them as Christmas gifts!

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

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rufiki

Ship's 'shroom
# 11165

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Um, Jesus' wardrobe appears to include a cross and a sheep. [Ultra confused]
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RadicalWhig
Shipmate
# 13190

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Pastor Shepherd Ministry Doll and Prayerhour Playset - just the thing to keep the budding young prosperity-gospel preachers of the future happy.

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Radical Whiggery for Beginners: "Trampling on the Common Prayer Book, talking against the Scriptures, commending Commonwealths, justifying the murder of King Charles I, railing against priests in general." (Sir Arthur Charlett on John Toland, 1695)

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jlg

What is this place?
Why am I here?
# 98

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quote:
Originally posted by rufiki:
Um, Jesus' wardrobe appears to include a cross and a sheep. [Ultra confused]

(jlg briefly channels Sheep3 and butts rufiki.

Baaah. jingle.

... exits stage left)


Um, ever hear Christ called "Lamb of God"?

You missed the papal mitre.

Posts: 17391 | From: Just a Town, New Hampshire, USA | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by jlg:
Um, ever hear Christ called "Lamb of God"?

Or the Good Shepherd?

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
rufiki

Ship's 'shroom
# 11165

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I was just bemused that they would be considered part of his wardrobe. "Today Jesus is sporting a lovely little woolly number..." But I just had another look and noticed the T-shirt that says "God, guns and guts made America free". Now I'm disturbed.
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Pearl B4 Swine
Ship's Oyster-Shucker
# 11451

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Sanctify your Halloween by carving your Jack-O-Lantern prayerfully. Suggestions for 'Christian' pumpkin designs here.

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Oinkster

"I do a good job and I know how to do this stuff" D. Trump (speaking of the POTUS job)

Posts: 3622 | From: The Keystone State | Registered: May 2006  |  IP: Logged
Lyda*Rose

Ship's broken porthole
# 4544

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Witches? Martinis? [Paranoid]

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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

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passer

Indigo
# 13329

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More for halloween at this site. Amongst other things, the wigs are just fab!

For those unfamiliar with the contemporary images of Jesus which are readily accessible all over the interwebz, this handy reminder is included:

quote:
What Does Jesus Looks Like?

Jesus is portrayed in the Bible and most photos as a man with shoulder-length brown hair, a full beard, wearing a mid-calf lenght white robe and sandals. In some pictures he is portrayed wearing a blue sash with this ensemble also.

The Bible references Jesus as a shepherd also, so in some instances he is pictured with a large staff, or rugged stick, in his hand.

In historical recordings, Jesus was crucified on a cross, resulting in some pictures portraying him with holes in his feet and the palms of his hands. In addition to the holes, he often is seen wearing a crown of thorns that the Romans put on his head when they placed him on the cross.


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la vie en rouge
Parisienne
# 10688

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*bump*

I just came accross the Martin Loofah King for inspirational exfoliation.

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Rent my holiday home in the South of France

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Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by la vie en rouge:
*bump*

I just came accross the Martin Loofah King for inspirational exfoliation.

How timely!

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Sandemaniac
Shipmate
# 12829

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The sarcastic reviews and the tags are well worth a read as well...

AG

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"It becomes soon pleasantly apparent that change-ringing is by no means merely an excuse for beer" Charles Dickens gets it wrong, 1869

Posts: 3574 | From: The wardrobe of my soul | Registered: Jul 2007  |  IP: Logged
Pure Sunshine
Shipmate
# 11904

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Cracked.com has done an article similar to Gadgets for God. Some of the entries are quite jaw-dropping (e.g. number 18)
Posts: 472 | From: UK | Registered: Oct 2006  |  IP: Logged
Keren-Happuch

Ship's Eyeshadow
# 9818

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I just came across the most jaw-dropping selection of "religion neckties" and felt the need to share it:

Neckties for Jesus

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Travesty, treachery, betrayal!
EXCESS - The Art of Treason
Nea Fox

Posts: 2407 | From: A Fine City | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged
luvanddaisies

the'fun'in'fundie'™
# 5761

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Wow, there're a *lot* of those.

Special style names that caught my eye were
"I Am Knock Off" and, in the "Life of Christ" section of neckties there were two little-known incidents depicted from Jesus's life - "Jesus prays with sheep" and "Metallic head of Christ".

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"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." (Mark Twain)

Posts: 3711 | From: all at sea. | Registered: Apr 2004  |  IP: Logged
Gladly The Cross-eyed Bear

Fixed Bearly Tone
# 9641

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There are several people in Queen Mousie's family who would love to have one of these to hang their "Happy Birthday Jesus" banner on for the Christmas season.

Gladly

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Percy, Mace, and Grease be with you!

Posts: 162 | From: East end of the Desolation of Smog | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged
comet

Snowball in Hell
# 10353

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have we come across the jesus toaster yet?

how about the Grilled Cheesus?

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Evil Dragon Lady, Breaker of Men's Constitutions

"It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.” -Calvin

Posts: 17024 | From: halfway between Seduction and Peril | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged
Chorister

Completely Frocked
# 473

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In Creamtealand at the moment you can buy Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh scented soaps.

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Retired, sitting back and watching others for a change.

Posts: 34626 | From: Cream Tealand | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged
mousethief

Ship's Thieving Rodent
# 953

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Is this the right place to put Christmas Kitsch? If so, here is this awful one:

27 worst nativity sets (there's actually 33 and counting)

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This is the last sig I'll ever write for you...

Posts: 63536 | From: Washington | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
Louise
Shipmate
# 30

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When money is no object! Put the Bling into BVM with this Sevan Bicakci Virgin Mary, amethyst and green diamond intaglio ring. A snip at £16,850 for the Bishop in your life - they'll queue round the block to kiss his ring!

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Now you need never click a Daily Mail link again! Kittenblock replaces Mail links with calming pics of tea and kittens! http://www.teaandkittens.co.uk/ Click under 'other stuff' to find it.

Posts: 6918 | From: Scotland | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Lamb Chopped
Ship's kebab
# 5528

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That is the fugliest ring I've seen in a long time. And what's with the description? "Amethysts, diamonds, and the Virg"

Sounds like some gangsta nickname.

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Er, this is what I've been up to (book).
Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down!

Posts: 20059 | From: off in left field somewhere | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged
Ancient Mariner

Sip the ship
# 4

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BVM ring would be a cert if we were doing Kitschmas this year. If you see anything else we'll stockpile for the next run. Meantime, this year's festive focus is Roll on Christmas.

[Cool]

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Ship of Fools' first novel, Rattles & Rosettes, is the tale of two football (soccer) fans: 16-year-old Tom in 1914 and Dan in 2010. More at www.rattlesandrosettes.com

Posts: 2582 | From: St Helens (near Liverpool) UK | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Lyda*Rose

Ship's broken porthole
# 4544

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quote:
Originally posted by Louise:
When money is no object! Put the Bling into BVM with this Sevan Bicakci Virgin Mary, amethyst and green diamond intaglio ring. A snip at £16,850 for the Bishop in your life - they'll queue round the block to kiss his ring!

Love this bit:
quote:
Add this 24K gold ring with amethyst, diamonds and The Virgin Mary from Sevan Bicakci to your fine jewellery collection. It is a beautiful and unique piece and will serve you well paired with your evening ensembles this coming season.
Accessorize your gala occasions with the BVM. [Roll Eyes]

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"Dear God, whose name I do not know - thank you for my life. I forgot how BIG... thank you. Thank you for my life." ~from Joe Vs the Volcano

Posts: 21377 | From: CA | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged
Darkwing
Shipmate
# 16207

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This sweater would make the Baby Jesus cry. You can get one off of eBay here!

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"Science was my most favorite subject, especially the Old Testament!"
- Kenneth, 30 Rock

Posts: 161 | From: NW Oregon, USA | Registered: Feb 2011  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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I don't think anyone's posted the delightful merchandise from Donkey Products (in Germany). I was at a concert this evening, and in the gift shop I found Holy Family Teabags! These were such wonderful Gadgets for God that I came home to check out their website, where I also found a Crucifixion Cookie Cutter and some interestingly-shaped "holy" soaps. Strangest of all -- the Breast Tree Ball [Eek!]

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Mamacita

Lakefront liberal
# 3659

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Fabulous finds, Pigwidgeon. The Crucifixion Cookie Cutter would make delightful treats for the reception after Easter services, don't you think?

If you want another good chuckle, run the product descriptions through Google Translator.

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Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world’s grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it.

Posts: 20761 | From: where the purple line ends | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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quote:
Originally posted by Mamacita:
If you want another good chuckle, run the product descriptions through Google Translator.

I actually did that with some that I couldn't translate myself!

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged
Simon

Editor
# 1

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Just a note to thank everyone for posting Gadget suggestions on this thread, and to say that the 12 Days of Kitschmas has just gone online...

The 12 Days of Kitschmas

Two or three items from this thread are credited there. Do let me know if others also need a thank you.

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Eternal memory

Posts: 3787 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
Pigwidgeon

Ship's Owl
# 10192

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I'm so proud! Two of my submissions made the list!
[Yipee]

(Long before I was even a registered Shipmate I was so excited to have one of my contributions included on the Gadgets page. It was probably the first time ever that my name -- my RL one -- appeared on the Internet.)

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"...that is generally a matter for Pigwidgeon, several other consenting adults, a bottle of cheap Gin and the odd giraffe."
~Tortuf

Posts: 9835 | From: Hogwarts | Registered: Aug 2005  |  IP: Logged



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