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Source: (consider it)
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Thread: Who is Justin Welby?
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Tortuf
Ship's fisherman
# 3784
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Posted
Who is the new ABC and what does that mean for the CoE?
(Who, as in what is he like, what are his beliefs in areas that rile folks here, etc.)
Posts: 6963 | From: The Venice of the South | Registered: Dec 2002
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Mudfrog
Shipmate
# 8116
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Posted
quote:
Originally posted by Tortuf:
Who is the new ABC and what does that mean for the CoE?
(Who, as in what is he like, what are his beliefs in areas that rile folks here, etc.)
Sorry, have you just arrived from afar?
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"The point of having an open mind, like having an open mouth, is to close it on something solid."
G.K. Chesterton
Posts: 8237 | From: North Yorkshire, UK | Registered: Jul 2004
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Hawk
Semi-social raptor
# 14289
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Posted
Perhaps he's just arrived from the east following a star?
Tortuf, you may find this thread helpful.
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“We are to find God in what we know, not in what we don't know." Dietrich Bonhoeffer
See my blog for 'interesting' thoughts
Posts: 1739 | From: Oxford, UK | Registered: Nov 2008
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Angloid
Shipmate
# 159
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Posted
And this one.
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Brian: You're all individuals!
Crowd: We're all individuals!
Lone voice: I'm not!
Posts: 12927 | From: The Pool of Life | Registered: May 2001
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rolyn
Shipmate
# 16840
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Posted
The clue to this thread is in the title .
Judging by interest it's attracted I think Archbishop Welby can take heart from one thing alone.... that being the state of extremely low expectations in which he has been called to operate.
Maybe this will turn out to be no bad thing.
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Change is the only certainty of existence
Posts: 3206 | From: U.K. | Registered: Dec 2011
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rolyn
Shipmate
# 16840
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Posted
Oh, I see the disscussion has been going on elsewhere . And hey , guess what it's about ? ![[Snore]](graemlins/snore.gif)
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Change is the only certainty of existence
Posts: 3206 | From: U.K. | Registered: Dec 2011
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Saul the Apostle
Shipmate
# 13808
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Posted
quote:
"I cannot forecast to you the action of Welby. He is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma; but perhaps there is a key. That key is the churches direction and focus ."
If I might mis quote Winston Churchill ![[Confused]](confused.gif)
Saul
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"I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma; but perhaps there is a key. That key is Russian national interest."
Posts: 1772 | From: unsure | Registered: Jun 2008
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ken
Ship's Roundhead
# 2460
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Posted
Dramatis personaeThe Bishop of Blackburn , The Archdeacon of Middlesborough-in-Cleveland. Justin Portal Welby, Bishop of Durham and Archbishop-elect of Canterbury; the Bishops of Dover and Ebbsfleet, the Bishop of Chester.
Blackburn: Trouble at mill.
Middlesborough:Oh no - what kind of trouble?
Blackburn: One on't cross beams gone owt askew on on t'treadle.
Middlesborough:Pardon?
Blackburn: One on't cross beams gone owt askew on t'treadle.
Middlesborough:I don't understand what you're saying.
Blackburn: One of the cross beams has gone a little askew on the treadle.
Middlesborough:Well what on earth does that mean?
Blackburn: I don't know - The The Archbishop of York just told me to come in here and say that there was trouble at the mill, that's all - I didn't expect some kind of Anglican Inquisition!
Baaaa-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!
Enter Justin Portal Welby, Bishop of Durham and Archbishop-elect of Canterbury, accompanied by Dover and Ebbsfleet.
Justin Welby:NOBODY expects the Anglican Inquisition! Our chief weapon is General Synod ... Synod and the Mother's Union ... the Mother's Union and Synod ... Our two weapons are the Mother's Union and Synod ... and endless committee meetings ... Our three weapons are the Mother's Union, Synod, and endless committee meetings ... and tasteful liturgy ... Our four ... no ... Amongst our weapons ... Amongst our weaponry ... are such elements as the Mother's Union, Synod ... I'll come in again.
Blackburn: I didn't expect a kind of Anglican Inquisition.
Baaaa-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!
Justin Welby:NOBODY expects the Anglican Inquisition! Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as: the Mother's Union, Synod, endless committee meetings, tasteful liturgy , and full-length surplices - Oh damn! ... I can't say it - you'll have to say it.
Dover: What?
Justin Welby:You'll have to say the bit about 'Our chief weapons are ... '
Dover: I couldn't do that ...
Blackburn: I didn't expect a kind of Anglican Inquisition.
Baaaa-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dover: Er ... Nobody ... um ...
Justin Welby:Expects ...
Dover: Expects ... Nobody expects the ... um ... the Anglican ... um ...
Justin Welby:Inquisition.
Dover: I know, I know! Nobody expects the Anglican Inquisition. In fact, those who do expect -
Justin Welby:Our chief weapons are ...
Dover: Our chief weapons are ... um ... er ...
Justin Welby:General Synod ...
Dover: General Synod and -
Justin Welby:Okay, stop. Stop. Stop there - stop there. Stop. Phew! Ah! ... our chief weapons are Synod ... blah blah blah. Bishop, read the charges.
Ebbsfleet: You are hereby charged that you did on diverse dates commit heresy against the Holy Church. 'My old man said follow the - '
Dover: That's enough. Now, how do you plead?
Middlesborough:We're innocent.
Justin Welby:Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Dover: We'll soon change your mind about that!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Justin Welby:Mother's Union, Synod, and a most tasteful - Ooooh! Now, Bishop - the rack!
Justin Welby:You ... Right! Tie him down.
Justin Welby:Right! How do you plead?
Middlesborough:Innocent.
Justin Welby:Ha! Right! Bishop, give the rack, oh dear, give the rack a turn.
Dover: I ...
Justin Welby:I know, I know you can't. I didn't want to say anything. I just wanted to try and ignore your crass mistake.
Dover: I ...
Justin Welby:It makes it all seem so stupid.
Dover: Shall I ... ?
Justin Welby:No, just pretend for God's sake. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
[Cut to them torturing the Bishop of Chester]
Justin Welby:Now, old man - you are accused of heresy on three counts - heresy by thought, heresy by word, heresy by deed, and heresy by action - four counts. Do you confess?
Chester: I don't understand what I'm accused of.
Justin Welby:Ha! Then we'll make you understand! Dover! Fetch ... HYMNS OLD AND NEW!
Baaaa-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dover: Here they are, lord.
Justin Welby:Now, old lady - you have one last chance. Confess the heinous sin of heresy, reject the works of the ungodly - two last chances. And you shall be free - three last chances. You have three last chances, the nature of which I have divulged in my previous utterance.
Chester: I don't know what you're talking about.
Justin Welby:Right! If that's the way you want it - Bishop! Sing number 328!
Justin Welby:Confess! Confess! Confess!
Dover: It doesn't seem to be hurting him, lord.
Justin Welby: Hm! He is made of harder stuff! Bishop Ebbsfleet! Fetch ... TEN CAROLS FOR MIXED VOICES ARRANGED BY JOHN RUTTER!!!!!
Baaaa-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ebbsfleet: Not the Rutter book!!!!!!!!!!!!
Justin Welby:So you think you are strong because you can survive the Kevin Mayhew? Well, we shall see. Dover! Sing him the Rutter!
Justin Welby: Now - you will stay listening to the Rutter rehearsal until lunch time, with only a cup of coffee at eleven. Is that really all it is?
Dover: Yes, my lord.
Justin Welby:I see. I suppose we make it worse by shouting a lot, do we? Confess, man. Confess! Confess! Confess! Confess!
Dover: I confess!
Justin Welby:Not you!
[ 10. December 2012, 15:02: Message edited by: ken ]
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Ken
L’amor che move il sole e l’altre stelle.
Posts: 39579 | From: London | Registered: Mar 2002
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Matt Black
Shipmate
# 2210
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Posted
As ever, Ken, ![[Overused]](graemlins/notworthy.gif)
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"Protestant and Reformed, according to the Tradition of the ancient Catholic Church" - + John Cosin (1594-1672)
Posts: 14304 | From: Hampshire, UK | Registered: Jan 2002
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Saul the Apostle
Shipmate
# 13808
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Posted
What he said - brilliant! ![[Biased]](wink.gif)
Saul the Apostle
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"I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma; but perhaps there is a key. That key is Russian national interest."
Posts: 1772 | From: unsure | Registered: Jun 2008
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PaulBC
Shipmate
# 13712
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Posted
Plagerizing Monty Python ? Brilliant and we need to have a sense of humour . Or is humour now heresey no no I am being chased by at least 3 bishops arrgghhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lots of great good luck to the new ABC!! ![[Smile]](smile.gif) ![[Angel]](graemlins/angel.gif) ![[Votive]](graemlins/votive.gif)
[ 10. December 2012, 22:13: Message edited by: PaulBC ]
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"He has told you O mortal,what is good;and what does the Lord require of youbut to do justice and to love kindness ,and to walk humbly with your God."Micah 6:8
Posts: 873 | From: Victoria B.C. Canada | Registered: May 2008
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