Thread: Backstage Noticeboard Board: Nativity Play / Ship of Fools.


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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 
Luvvies and dahlings,

There have been some movements in the Management - I put it down to a dodgy chicken bhuna, but apparently it is not. You may want to take note of the following:

Each scene will be started at 8pm GMT each day (there is a list of scenes available in the Programme). The scene will close at 12 midday GMT the next day, this should give members of the cast the world over chance to let their dramatic light shine. Alternatively it will give most people the time to make a fool of themselves on stage.

Please be promptly on-stage at the beginning of any scene you play a part in. I do not have to remind you how angry our beloved Director can get, and the painful way she exacts punishment on any misbehaving member of the cast.

A review of each scene will be written by the late, great Steve Tomkins and will be published on the day following the scene wot he is writing about. Fear not, he has better grammar than me. And I hear he is cheaper to bribe as well...

If there are any more important announcements please keep an eye on this noticeboard. And one more thing - please don't try to sell any broken buggies or dodgy copies of Britney Spears albums on here, ok?

Musical Director

[Changed scene closing time, see note below]

[ 11. December 2002, 16:10: Message edited by: Musical Director ]
 

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Posted by Assorted Strings (# 3652) on :
 
Dear Sir/Madam/exalted management types,

As I understand it, scenes for the forthcoming (nay in progress) production Ship of Fools Nativity Play are to be performed between the hours of 8pm and 8am the following day.

Sadly, this means I will be unable to play my part (apart from throwing rotten fruit or veg on the thread in heaven) as I am off-line during those hours.

Is there any hope for those of us who are only on-line during English working hours, or will I have to tender my resignation?

In hope of a reprieve,

Your faithful string section.
 

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Posted by Herod (# 3649) on :
 
It's bloody typical this.

My big scene (my only flipping scene, to be honest) falls on Sunday evening.

No-one's online Sunday evenings.

(Plus I have a carol concert (and doubtless a pub) to go to Sunday evening.

That's unless the Nativity has its interval at the weekend.

Come to think of it, aren't most people either Leeds-meeting or Manc-meeting Saturday too?
 

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Posted by Lowly Stage Hand (# 3648) on :
 
Dear Musical Director,

Unfortunately, I find myself in exactly the same position as Assorted Strings.

Is there any possibility of another solution?
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 
People, people, cease your warbling! We are looking into the extension of the Scenes to last a bit longer to allow those who prefer to sleep at night to play their parts. I will get back to you very shortly. Watch this page *points to empty flightcase*

And as to you, Herod...

quote:

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Originally posted by Herod:
No-one's online Sunday evenings.

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quote:

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Come to think of it, aren't most people either Leeds-meeting or Manc-meeting Saturday too?

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Yes they are. Does the Moon Under Water have a phone point we can borrow? If not we'll just have to drown our sorrows in Manchester ale.
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 
OK, new change. Scenes will now run from 8pm to 12 midday the next day. At 12 sharp the scene will be locked, and the next scene opened at 8pm.

This should hopefully give everyone chance to post.

[Edited message above to reflect new change]
 

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Posted by Assorted Strings (# 3652) on :
 
Thank you.


 

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Posted by Angel 1 (# 3661) on :
 
erm, might be busy next tuesday when it finally time for the angels to be around.

but i'll try and get here eventualy (possibly late)

A
 

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Posted by Virgin Mary (# 3653) on :
 
I have posted elsewhere to the fact that tomorrow night I shall be being mother to another little boy in another Nativity play and will be slightly late online, depending on how quicky I can calm down the Smudgelet after his starring role as a chef (yes, a chef!) and get him and his brother settled into bed.

Then on Friday the journey to Bethlehem will probably have a major diversion via Cubs and Sainsbury's which will mean I will not be online until 9pm. I'll just have to rely on Joseph to do all the packing and get the donkey ready. Make sure you remember to lock the front door and cancel the milk, Joe!

I am seriously concerned that this commitment to the Nativity play may result in me becoming addicted to Ship of Fools, as I know has already happened to some of you, but I continue to battle against it.
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Virgin Mary:
I am seriously concerned that this commitment to the Nativity play may result in me becoming addicted to Ship of Fools, as I know has already happened to some of you, but I continue to battle against it.

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Posted by chief stage manager (# 3658) on :
 
I have a mandatory staff meeting Thursday which, given the notoriety of them lasting for 5 hours, may prevent me from being online til 9:30 or 10pm GMT tomorrow night.

This is fretting me mightily. I know I'm addicted.
 

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Posted by Evil Henchman (# 3705) on :
 
As a number of us are Meeting at Leeds or Manchester over the weekend, plus others who are only online during working hours (9-5 Mon-Fri) I suggets that there are no scenes over the weekend...

Tis just a suggestion however, and I shall bow to the hosts decision. (I'll bitch about it and them in the cafe for weeks however )

Evil Henchman
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 
I hear your concerns regarding the weekend performances, however unless there is a major shift in ... well, lots of things, the performances will go as planned. Surely each scene running for 16 hours is long enough for you to get on stage? And as to the opening of Scene 6 (On the Road to Bethlehem) on Saturday night, we will just have to see what we can sort out for that...

Keep the ideas coming! And if you dare 'bitch about it and them in the cafe for weeks' then you will learn all about the sharp end of a trombone slide, ok?
 

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Posted by Equity Deputy (# 3673) on :
 
May I observe that Erin has been reading Dumbledore's Christmas list, and seems to be the one person in the cast with a pair of socks!
 

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Posted by Dragon (# 3669) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Musical Director:
Luvvies and dahlings,

A review of each scene will be written by the late, great Steve Tomkins and will be published on the day following the scene wot he is writing about. ...

Musical Director

[Changed scene closing time, see note below]

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quote:

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Originally posted by Equity Deputy:
May I observe that Erin has been reading Dumbledore's Christmas list, and seems to be the one person in the cast with a pair of socks!

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No, we shepherds all have socks. And wash them every night.
 

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Posted by Camel driver (# 3655) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by angel 5:
I'm glad it's changed, but with no net access apart from a school computer, i can't get online til at least 9am, which means i've missed most of the action...
oh well...i'll just make a nuisence of my self back stage...

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Same problem, but multiplied by an unreasonable management expecting me to do some work when I arrive in the office, meant that I only just arrived in time for the end of Scene 3 - by which point some scoundrel had taken the kings/wise men on a TOUR BUS to follow the star!!

I will be complaining to the union about this - what's a humble camel-driver to do to make a living? What's wrong with, say, 1700 GMT (1200 EST) as a closing time??

At least the camel-manure business has some growth in it...
 

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Posted by Angel 3 (# 3687) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Camel driver:
Same problem, but multiplied by an unreasonable management expecting me to do some work when I arrive in the office, meant that I only just arrived in time for the end of Scene 3 - by which point some scoundrel had taken the kings/wise men on a TOUR BUS to follow the star!!

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quote:

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Originally posted by Camel driver:
Same problem, but multiplied by an unreasonable management expecting me to do some work when I arrive in the office, meant that I only just arrived in time for the end of Scene 3 - by which point some scoundrel had taken the kings/wise men on a TOUR BUS to follow the star!!

I will be complaining to the union about this - what's a humble camel-driver to do to make a living? What's wrong with, say, 1700 GMT (1200 EST) as a closing time??

At least the camel-manure business has some growth in it...

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Sir Camel Driver... apologies. But The Show Must Go On. Or in this case, off.

You may have noticed from my post that being a point-to-point low-fares operation I actually commit myself to deposit all those on board some 40 miles from their destination, which gives you a rather useful loophole.

In fact, I am tied up with some other business in an alternative universe (real life) when the curtain goes up on scene 4, so maybe you can rescue the multitudes, and the script, then, perhaps by preparing your lines beforehand?

At your service,

The Low-Cost Option
 

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Posted by Fairy Godmother (# 3695) on :
 
Lost

I seem to have mislaid a few hipflasks during the last few performances

I know I passed one to Herod, another to Rudolph and a third to Elizabeth. If they could hand them back to me it would be appreciated. (You may even benefit from refills )

They have great sentimental value as well as serving a practical use for both myself and other cast members.

Your help in recoving these items would be invaluable.
 

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Posted by Deputy Chief Shepherd (# 3698) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Fairy Godmother:
Lost I seem to have mislaid a few hipflasks during the last few performances

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quote:

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Originally posted by Camel driver:
I only just arrived in time for the end of Scene 3 - by which point some scoundrel had taken the kings/wise men on a TOUR BUS to follow the star!!

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Actually, things do get very confused as the kings depart, but my overall reading of the stage action was that a number of Harley motorbikes mysteriously appear on stage, at which point the Kings, by now having manifested as members of ZZ Tops, ride off on the bikes, while the Shepherds have rescued the sheep and assorted other animal life and put them in the tour bus...

I also got the impression that the kings were quite keen on the motorbike angle, there was a lot of engine revving going on.

I think it would be nice to keep this reading of the plot, it fits very well with Zephirine's persona as Bee of Good Cheer and also I do rather like the image of Alan togged up in ZZ Tops gear as a biker on a Harley...

But of course the Tour Bus would be handy to carry all their gear, you wouldn't expect kings to travel with only what they could fit in their panniers.

Cheers

WDx

[ 13. December 2002, 13:41: Message edited by: Musical Director ]
 

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Posted by Angel 1 (# 3661) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Fairy Godmother:
Lost

I seem to have mislaid a few hipflasks during the last few performances

I know I passed one to Herod, another to Rudolph and a third to Elizabeth. If they could hand them back to me it would be appreciated. (You may even benefit from refills )

They have great sentimental value as well as serving a practical use for both myself and other cast members.

Your help in recoving these items would be invaluable.

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I have stolen said hip flasks as you were mean and wouldn't give me any.
if you say sorry, I might return them.


Angel 1
 

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Posted by Assorted Strings (# 3652) on :
 
Now Herod's a terrible man,
For it seems that his name doesn't scan.
But if you make a start,
Your narrationly art
Will ensure that you soon have a plan.
 

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Posted by Miss Ship of Fools 2002 (# 3718) on :
 
Oh there you are Narrator... I saw you needed some help with the rhyming, and since I realise you haven’t actually mentioned me in any of your poems you obviously need some help with my name too. I’m only backstage of course, but you may need a filler at some point and recording some of the valiant acts of programme folding and crown making, not to mention the tealady, might be a nice way of keeping everyone involved. Otherwise you do get a lot of un-sung heros, and though the vicar always makes a point of saying thank-you I think it always helps keep morale up to include everyone.

I find Miss Ship of Fools 2002 rhymes quite well with
Miss Slip-on Shoes, turquoise or blue?
Miss Trip in Pools, I’m wet all through,
Miss Clip with Tools, Build it with Glue
Miss Sip or Drools, Vodka in Stew.

Do hope that’s of help to you dear. Many years of helping Richard with his English homework helped me develop my little poetry talent, though now he’s graduated from university I don’t often get a chance to practice!
 

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Posted by angel 5 (# 3696) on :
 
notice that might not belong here...
i don't think i'll have any net access 'til Monday...
So just imagine me playing songs badly on a recorder, and generally annoying every one...
there now, i bet you're all so dissapointed!

 

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Posted by Camel driver (# 3655) on :
 
I'm afraid that I shan't be here until Monday morning UK time, so the trip to Herod will have to happen without the aid of my Certified Camel Driving* skills.

Can I please ask all principals and extras to note the following:

• The camels will be off stage left - please do not frighten them or offer them alcoholic drink (this means you, Fairy Godmother) if you don't want to be up to your necks in camel dung
• Can the kings/wise men take just one camel each, following the colour-coded keys left in the dressing room
• The rest of the caravan can be taken on stage only if accompanied by a suitably qualified stage hand (I expect the Equity Deputy to advise on this)
• All camels will be counted against manifest on Monday morning - breakages and other damage must be paid for, as stated in the contract

Have fun and remember - be careful out there
* Doesn't specify whether the driving, the camels or the driver are (or should be) certified...
 

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Posted by Narrator (# 3680) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Miss Ship of Fools 2002:
I find Miss Ship of Fools 2002 rhymes quite well with
Miss Slip-on Shoes, turquoise or blue?
Miss Trip in Pools, I’m wet all through,
Miss Clip with Tools, Build it with Glue
Miss Sip or Drools, Vodka in Stew.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Camel driver:
I'm afraid that I shan't be here until Monday morning UK time, so the trip to Herod will have to happen without the aid of my Certified Camel Driving* skills.

Can I please ask all principals and extras to note the following:

• The camels will be off stage left - please do not frighten them or offer them alcoholic drink (this means you, Fairy Godmother) if you don't want to be up to your necks in camel dung
• Can the kings/wise men take just one camel each, following the colour-coded keys left in the dressing room
• The rest of the caravan can be taken on stage only if accompanied by a suitably qualified stage hand (I expect the Equity Deputy to advise on this)
• All camels will be counted against manifest on Monday morning - breakages and other damage must be paid for, as stated in the contract

Have fun and remember - be careful out there
* Doesn't specify whether the driving, the camels or the driver are (or should be) certified...

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quote:

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However, it is quite possible and indeed likely that their luggage, which I suppose is in the tour bus with the sheep, is going to get lost if we have an absentee camel driver.

Mind you, it also seems plausible that those sheep are capable of making their way to Bethlehem on their own steam...

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It's okay. The luggage has been DHL'ed and, according to the waybill, is waiting at the Inn for them to collect it. And the sheep seem prefectly comfortable in this large van that I stole...borrowed and we should be on schedule for tonight's appearence

The Understudy

PS He told me that Showbusiness was glamourous. He lie
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Understudy:
PS He told me that Showbusiness was glamourous. He lie

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quote:

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Originally posted by Dragon:

quote:

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Doesn't specify whether the driving, the camels or the driver are (or should be) certified...

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Um, as I mentioned before the Wise men actually left on motorbikes (I was on stage at the time and trying to work out what was going on, I remember it all most clearly.)

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(er...hit wrong button. so sorry)

could this be a problem ?

[Maybe, but for the moment I am more worried about your coding...]

[ 13. December 2002, 19:44: Message edited by: Musical Director ]
 

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Posted by Equity Deputy (# 3673) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Camel driver:
<snip>

• <snip>
• The rest of the caravan can be taken on stage only if accompanied by a suitably qualified stage hand (I expect the Equity Deputy to advise on this)
• All camels will be counted against manifest on Monday morning - breakages and other damage must be paid for, as stated in the contract <snip>

..

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quote:

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Originally posted by Narrator:

quote:

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Originally posted by Miss Ship of Fools 2002:
I find Miss Ship of Fools 2002 rhymes quite well with
Miss Slip-on Shoes, turquoise or blue?
Miss Trip in Pools, I’m wet all through,
Miss Clip with Tools, Build it with Glue
Miss Sip or Drools, Vodka in Stew.

---

Thank you, most helpful.

Now, the next name on my list...

Joseph.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Angel 1:
I have stolen said hip flasks as you were mean and wouldn't give me any.
if you say sorry, I might return them.

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It's OK luv - I've plenty more where they came from and despite what I said about sentiment value I wouldn't want them after you grubby little hands have been all over them
 

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Posted by Angel 1 (# 3661) on :
 
you just watch what you're saying, fairy. I've got friends in high places!

A
 

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Posted by Fairy Godmother (# 3695) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Angel 1:
you just watch what you're saying, fairy. I've got friends in high places!

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I've got wings as well you know...
 

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Posted by Angel 1 (# 3661) on :
 
yeah, but they're held on with sellotape and glue.
A

[ 13. December 2002, 23:44: Message edited by: Musical Director ]
 

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Posted by Fairy Godmother (# 3695) on :
 
You only manage it with the help of a harness

And with your weight only just I notice...
 

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Posted by Angel 1 (# 3661) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Fairy Godmother:
You only manage it with the help of a harness

And with your weight only just I notice...

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quote:

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Originally posted by Musical Director:
*notices no ladies present*

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quote:

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Originally posted by Virgin Mary:

quote:

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Originally posted by Musical Director:
*notices no ladies present*

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*ahem*

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quote:

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Originally posted by Musical Director:
*notices no ladies present*

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you mean person.

A
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Angel 1:

quote:

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Originally posted by Musical Director:
*notices no ladies present*

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you mean person.

A

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I'm still standing by my original point
 

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Posted by Stable Cat (# 3657) on :
 
hello there, this is the cats minder. i'm sorry to say that my little darling probably won't be in the next scene, due to other commitments. and i'm so sorry that she shredded that little black-and-white, um, was it a dog? but after all, the little dear was attacked. really, you should keep dangerous animals like that under control!
 

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Posted by Donkey (# 3752) on :
 
Everybody look out! I am here and ready to go on down the road to Bethle,,,ahem. Yeah, that's it!
 

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Posted by Director (# 3664) on :
 
Glad to know you got here safely, Donkey.
 

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Posted by Fairy Godmother (# 3695) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Musical Director:
Ladies, ladies! *notices no ladies present* Women, women! Please, desist and cease this pointless squabbling. You're upsetting the animals.

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I've always said I'm no lady - and I wasn't upsetting any animal - just a fairy
 

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Posted by Virgin Mary (# 3653) on :
 
Am I the only one who misread the Director's location as "From her Psychotherapist's Couch"? Interesting!
 

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Posted by Sheep 3 (# 3663) on :
 
Baaaaaa

*jingle, jingle*
 

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Posted by Angel 6 (# 3709) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Herod:
I do not pander to the critics....

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That's all right, Your Wickedness -- the critics don't pander to you, either!


 

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Posted by Angel 6 (# 3709) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Angel 1:

quote:

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Originally posted by Musical Director:
*notices no ladies present*

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you mean person.

A

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Don't cry. We'll get them later, with the Angelic Kazoo Chorus. They'll be sorry!



Angel 6, with a tough hide and no need for a harness
 

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Posted by A very naughty boy (# 3677) on :
 
Pending software problems I may or may not be there tonight, if I'm not there then please leave me sleeping,

Thanks.
 

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Posted by Director (# 3664) on :
 
Request from a poor, tired Director...

Re: Cafe

Please could we try and keep all shop talk to the Rehearsal Hall and away from the Gangway. It's great to see so many people entering into the spirit of the thing; making the Nativity play the undoubted success it is (Eutychus is snowed under with bookings ) but...we do need to give a thought to other people wbo aren't as involved. I'd feel pretty miffed for example,if I logged in and all my fellow coffee drinkers were yattering on about the football results ad nauseam

ta
Miffy

p.s. And don't forget the Union noticeboard and audience participation threads. Use them!

[ 16. December 2002, 10:36: Message edited by: Director ]
 

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Posted by Deputy Chief Shepherd (# 3698) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Director:
Please could we try and keep all shop talk to the Rehearsal Hall

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Rehearsal? What's a rehearsal?

And we have a Rehearsal Hall? Where?
 

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Posted by Director (# 3664) on :
 
You'll find the Rehearsal Hall in the cafe.

 

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Posted by Equity Deputy (# 3673) on :
 
I haven't been able to spend time in the cafe recently, but I would be pleased to see supplements to the Deputy Reports posted in the Union Office thread and incorporate any interesting statistics into my spreadsheet archive.

Cheers -
 

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Posted by Angel 1 (# 3661) on :
 
oops, messed that one up. maybe have been at booze already. ammended version. . . .

quote:

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Originally posted by Angel 1:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Angel 6:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Angel 1:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Musical Director:
*notices no ladies present*

---

you mean person.

A

---

Don't cry. We'll get them later, with the Angelic Kazoo Chorus. They'll be sorry!



Angel 6, with a tough hide and no need for a harness

---

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quote:

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Originally posted by Even Lowlier Shepherd:
How the heck are we supposed to drag out this Angels telling Shepherds scene all night? Anyone else up for a pub crawl?

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Don't ask me, I'm just the Musical Director. You need to ask the Narrator or Director about that side of things
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 
OK Listen Up All Cast Members

On Friday we have the big Other Visitors To The Stable Scene. This is the big chance for all the backstage crew, plus any members of the cast who haven't yet had the opportunity or courage to tread the boards to do so.

Please be onstage promptly to get in queue to see the Christ-child (and Evil Twin of course) bearing gifts. But none of this namby-pamby perfume rubbish - bring practical, unusual or just plain expected presents.

So there you are - your big chance to shine. Don't mess it up. Or if you do, do it in a funny manner. And remember - speak slowly and c l e a r l y.
 

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Posted by Techie1 (# 3688) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Stable Cat:
hello there, this is the cats minder...i'm so sorry that she shredded that little black-and-white, um, was it a dog? but after all, the little dear was attacked. really, you should keep dangerous animals like that under control!

---

Hmmm... the story I heard was that the dog got a pretty good piece of that cat...After all, it was mostly black fur on the stage and the dog is white... Funny how the cat has "other commitments" and won't be showing up... Those other commitments wouldn't be at a vetinary hospital, would it???
 

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Posted by Angel 6 (# 3709) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Angel 1:
...When does the bar/tealady start serving?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Angel 6:
We don't need no stinkin' tealadies; we're ANGELS, and we can conjure up the stuff with a snap of the fingers ... The choice is yours, and the Tealady doesn't get a cut!

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Angel 6:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Angel 1:
...When does the bar/tealady start serving?

---

We don't need no stinkin' tealadies; we're ANGELS, and we can conjure up the stuff with a snap of the fingers.

What would you prefer -- Courvoisier? Single malt scotch? Dom Perignon? Jack Daniels? Bud Lite? The choice is yours, and the Tealady doesn't get a cut!

---

As is consistent with my current satatus as fallen angel I would like some WKD please.

realsies that please isn't very fallen

NOW



A
 

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Posted by Mother Mary (# 3799) on :
 
You can't rely on Cub leaders to do the right thing any more, can you? Akela has decided to have a Christmas Party for the Cubs on Friday night, despite all my protestations. I am trying frantically to organise someone to pick Tiddles up after the party, but if I fail to do so, I won't be home and online until about nine. Visitors will just have to form an orderly queue at the stable door and wait patiently.

(Of course, if Tiddles misbehaves between now and then, I might have to ban him from the party! )
 

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Posted by Assorted Strings (# 3652) on :
 

quote:

---

posted by the Musical Director:
On Friday we have the big Other Visitors To The Stable Scene. This is the big chance for all the backstage crew, plus any members of the cast who haven't yet had the opportunity or courage to tread the boards to do so.

Please be onstage promptly to get in queue to see the Christ-child (and Evil Twin of course) bearing gifts. But none of this namby-pamby perfume rubbish - bring practical, unusual or just plain expected presents.

---

quote:

---

Hmmm... the story I heard was that the dog got a pretty good piece of that cat...After all, it was mostly black fur on the stage and the dog is white... Funny how the cat has "other commitments" and won't be showing up...

---

the cat's grey, love. not black. all that black fur came out of that little mongral of yours.

and, just to be srious and step into my real person for a moment, the other commitments included a seriously sick daughter, and i really don't think the comments are funny.
 

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Posted by chief stage manager (# 3658) on :
 
Eek!

As is typical for my w@*#kplace, a Case Review meeting which was supposed to begin an hour ago and was pushed up to this hour has yet to begin.

There is no telling when it will start now, and even worse is how long it will last.

Sorry, I might not be backstage for while this evening. Will sign in as soon as I can. I'm praying as I type for this #@*#### ordeal just to be cancelled.
 

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Posted by Mother Mary (# 3799) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by chief stage manager:

Sorry, I might not be backstage for while this evening. Will sign in as soon as I can.

---

Does this mean that the all-purpose stand-in for the understudy will need an understudy to stand in for her?

quote:

---

I'm praying as I type for this #@*#### ordeal just to be cancelled.

---

I hope you are not referring to the nativity play!
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Stable Cat:
and, just to be srious and step into my real person for a moment, the other commitments included a seriously sick daughter, and i really don't think the comments are funny.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Musical Director:
...I have shares in the Tealady's business venture...

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mother Mary:
Originally posted by chief stage manager:

quote:

---

I'm praying as I type for this #@*#### ordeal just to be cancelled.

---

I hope you are not referring to the nativity play!

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Let me make myself clearer.

The Nativity Play is a love. It's my j-o-b I'd love to have the Fairy Godmother turn into a lump of coal. (I suppose she doesn't do evil tricks, though...)
 

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Posted by Fairy Godmother (# 3695) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by chief stage manager:
The Nativity Play is a love. It's my j-o-b I'd love to have the Fairy Godmother turn into a lump of coal. (I suppose she doesn't do evil tricks, though...)

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quote:

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posted by on Funny things kids say

Rowen
Shipmate
# 1194

Posted 26. November 2002 22:57

The Sunday School Xmas play was in full swing.
Mary and Joseph came down the aisle of the church, looking very sweet and solemn.
"Mary" looked over at her family.... Daddy, Mummy and the 2 six month old twin boys. They were so proud of her!
They walked behind the pulpit, and re-appeared. Mary loving clutched the baby doll wrapped in a rug.
As clergy MC, I announced that they had been given a son by God. Joseph spoke strongly. "His name is Jesus!"
They walked over to the crib, and were about to lay Jesus therein, when Mary looked troubled. She glanced at me, and I craned my head- aha, a Sunday School teacher had goofed up. There was a baby Jesus doll already there in the crib! What was I to do?
But Mary kept her calm. She picked up the second doll, and announced with great joy "And this one is called Malcolm. He is Jesus' loved twin brother, and they are identical!"
So I did my usual giggle giggle giggle

Actually, upon reflection, the existance of such a twin might explain many of the mysteries found in the gospels....

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[ 22. December 2002, 19:07: Message edited by: Musical Director ]
 

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Posted by Wise Guy (# 3707) on :
 
Hi, Kelly here. I've been having a rough couple of days, computer/life wise, and I apologise for my abscence on the board. I will be raring to go tomorrow, though.

I suppose I have been aptly punished in that I have missed the Baby Jesus!

Sorry again...
 

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Posted by Chief Wise Man (# 3674) on :
 
I have a party engagement at 14.00 GMT-6 so I shan't make curtain up. Break a leg; I'm there with you in (Great) Spirit, sibs. It's been fun and has made what would have been a melancholy roll-up to the Big Day filled with splatterings of mirth.

God Bless Us Every One,
(said without tongue in cheek)

CWM/Geek
 

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Posted by Director (# 3664) on :
 
Free to good home.

Several dozen leftover mincepies.

Will swap with creme n' onion Pringles.

(Never again!)
 

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Posted by Director (# 3664) on :
 
Calling Pilot, calling Pilot!

Come in Pilot. You're needed onstage.
 

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Posted by Deputy Chief Shepherd (# 3698) on :
 
Staggers offstage. Grabs at water bottle.

Well. Glad that's over. I like a happy ending!
 

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Posted by Black Angel (# 3676) on :
 
Ohhhh there's hours yet for things to go pear-shaped in.

'Specially as our pilot seems to be asleep at the wheel.

Anyone up for the auto-pilot failing?
 

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Posted by Assorted Strings (# 3652) on :
 
Oooh yes, I'll swap you Pringles for the mince pies. Got any brandy butter to go with them?
 

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Posted by Angel 1 (# 3661) on :
 
Mmmm, I love brandy butter. unfortunatly I hate christmas pudding, mince pies and anything else that it goes with.

wouldn't mind the pringles though.
 

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Posted by Assorted Strings (# 3652) on :
 
This is beginning to sound like we're getting the cast party food sorted.

So far we have:

Mince pies - Director
Pringles - Strings (note to self: keep 'em away from Joseph)
Brandy butter - no offers yet

Anyone else got anything to contribute?
Tea-lady?
 

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Posted by Tour Manager (# 3670) on :
 
Come on you lot! All aboard or we'll never make it to next year's performance!
 

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Posted by Assorted Strings (# 3652) on :
 
Well, that's it folks. The curtain has descended. The fat lady has sung.

I vote we have three cheers for our Director and Musical Director.

Hip hip.....
 

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Posted by Passer-by 3 (# 3711) on :
 
Well, that's the end of that then. My throats hoarse after those last few scenes.

Secombe: Right. Round the back for the old brandy there!
 

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Posted by Understudy (# 3717) on :
 
I come bearing mince pies and mulled wine ... And a fresh batch of cup-cakes

The Understudy
 

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Posted by Assorted Strings (# 3652) on :
 
Excellent.

I've also got some sausage rolls.

I know Angel 6 is saying they've already had the party, but I think we need another one for those hard working members of the cast who didn't get to the first one.
 

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Posted by Joseph (# 3666) on :
 
I'm still annoyed they had a party on the concorde I was taking and didn't wake me up. Anyway, I've got some party poppers...

*pop*
 

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Posted by Chief Wise Man (# 3674) on :
 
Hooray!

(said to the earlier proferred "hip, hip...")

Well done Miffy and ChrisT and the ever-amazing and prolific BVM Smudgie who carried the play from beginning to end. Dunno how you did it ... even with a minor role, I had a hard time finding enuf time to contribute.

And a rasberry to the critic, for good measure . phhhhtth.
 

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Posted by Fairy Godmother (# 3695) on :
 
Does anyone want some twiglets?

I've also got a few packets of pork scratchings and some bottles of Black Sheep and Riggwelter for the beer lovers.

The contents of the hips flasks are mine and mine alone. Unless you care to remove them...
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 
Riggwelter and mince pie for me please (just about to do this in real lafe, actually!)

Hurrah! Well done everyone. The party has now officially started!
 

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Posted by Mother Mary (# 3799) on :
 
*sigh*... OK, point me in the direction of the kitchen, somebody. *sigh* I'll take my hot chocolate and my mince pie with me.
 

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Posted by Mother Mary (# 3799) on :
 
I would just like it put on record that is was my full intention to reunite my son and myself with my beloved husband this morning.... but someone closed the thread before I got home!!!
 

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Posted by Musical Director (# 3651) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Mother Mary:
I would just like it put on record that is was my full intention to reunite my son and myself with my beloved husband this morning.... but someone closed the thread before I got home!!!

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quote:

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Originally posted by Assorted Strings:
Did you say Black Sheep?

Yes, please!

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quote:

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Originally posted by kenwritez:
What's up with the critic ducking out before play's end? WTF????

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Yes kenwritez, I hear he was out for a duck*

* English expression, means to be 'out' in cricket without making a single run/point - the ultimate shame for an Englishman
 

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Posted by Schroedinger's cat (# 64) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by ChrisT:

quote:

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Originally posted by kenwritez:
What's up with the critic ducking out before play's end? WTF????

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Yes kenwritez, I hear he was out for a duck*

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Casting aspertions on his private life will not help in the next performance, you know.
 

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Posted by kingsfold (# 1726) on :
 
Given his nekked dance on the roof of the tour bus, I'm not sure that there's much left private...
 

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